Scorp Men- genuine or have hidden agenda?

This topic was created in the Scorpio forum by unsure_aries on Monday, August 24, 2009 and has 44 replies.
Ah...the eternal scorpio issue...it's never going to go away!!
A lot of them are game players. I think it's because they are trying to protect themselves. So, this back and forth could go on for quite some time. As an Aries myself, I could never handle it due to my lack of patience and my hatred of the game itself. He's testing you...that's what they do. Just stand your ground and be a strong Aries and see how it plays out.
Good luck girl...could be a rough ride!!
oh god! is he a sagi moon?smile scorp like to play games. sex implied games a lot but sexually wise aries are way more out there with no games. i'm aries with scorp bf and it's always been annoying. when he's with friends/work he's that super rock star guy full of fun & every guy wants to be him and every girl wants to do him. but when he's with my his booooring and not that sexual. i know i'm gonna get a lot of beating him & some ppl will blame me but that's how most scorps are. all high talk but not as much action. they more of perceptual ppl & aries are more doers.
it's all about power games for them. that's how he "controls" the situation. i want you but i'm not going to sleep with you. and when i'll sleep with you it's going to be when i want to sleep with you. moronic! my freaks out when i bring up sex too many times.
don't fall for his crap & stop getting confused if you can help it. take it with a grain of salt. he will want to control the situation. and he is playing head games but will never admit it. don't reply to him for a while and see what happenssmile if he wants to be with you then he'll go after you for real.
good luck!smile it's not going to be an action driven relationship but mostly emotional manipulation and scorp stupid testing. so, decide if you want that.
Personally, I would be a tad shy. The way he texts I guess I would text like that too or really similarly. I really do think he likes you/ wants to kiss you.
Oh and I would prefer Passion to sex anyday. I doubt he just wants sex from you, if he loves/likes you.
hi ariessunsmile how are you? i was just rereading the reading messagessmile everything ok i guess. we're getting to the the point of either do or don't. he has to go away for a few months and it was done without my decisions involved. so, that triggered me for to have couple of heart to hearts. he wants to stay with me and doesn't want the relationship to end but not ready to think as "we" and take the next step. so, it makes me think about the whole "we" as both of us at this point. it's almost 2 years and it's getting stale so it's either do or don't. i'm not looking forward to breaking up or be single or date other ppl. and i do want to be with him but can't be in a limbo and live off the possibilities. so, don't know what to do at this point. there are cons & pros. you know the usual scorp thing.
he decided to go away and he didn't realize that i'd be upset. wtf???? do men think before they do anything????? maybe, it is true that if he'd want to be with me he'd include me in the decision. don't know...
ariessun - tnx for your supportsmile isn't it funny that most of aries women/scorp men relationships are so similar it's scarryWinking
yes, it has a lot to do with moon sign. if he's a cancer moon then run run and then run faster. very bad combo for an aries woman. then sagi moon is the next one to stay away from and, of course, the one that my scorp bf has. just my luck.
Posted by ramfishtwins
Ah...the eternal scorpio issue...it's never going to go away!!
A lot of them are game players. I think it's because they are trying to protect themselves. So, this back and forth could go on for quite some time. As an Aries myself, I could never handle it due to my lack of patience and my hatred of the game itself. He's testing you...that's what they do. Just stand your ground and be a strong Aries and see how it plays out.
Good luck girl...could be a rough ride!!


thank you RFT! ugh, why do they have to be like this?! haha. i think that i actually have pretty good patience/willpower, but i just don't want to get screwed over or effed with, and that's why it's so difficult/annoying to deal with! hah.
yeah, i'm trying to not play the games back anymore...and i've already brought it up twice. do you think he wants me to play games back and be chill/laid-back or stand up to his antics? i just don't know the best route to take?!
thank you!! smile
Posted by IcyG
Personally, I would be a tad shy. The way he texts I guess I would text like that too or really similarly. I really do think he likes you/ wants to kiss you.


i hope you're right IcyG!! but he just soooo doesn't come off shy at all, that's the thing...
i wish Scorps weren't so darn hard to read! haha. thanks IcyG smile
Posted by starsapphire91
Hey girl!
I think you need to put your foot down, and leave the ball in his court. Tell him, "Look, i'm sick of playing games with you. I want somethimg real, and i need a man who knows what he wants. So, you contact me when your ready to grow up and be serious." And don't call him, text him, or contact him in any way unless he contacts you first. I think this is the best solution because this will force him to get over himself and realize that if he wants to be with you, he's gotta be more mature and sure of himself and his feelings. Plus, if this does work, and a real relationship forms, then he will know in the future that his game-playing is NOT acceptable. To all the women who say that this is a Scorpio male trait, only immature men act like this. Mature people in general are sure of their feelings and are direct with them, and don't have to play mind games and dance around their feelings because they aren't sure about what they want. I can't believe that EVERY Scorpio male in this world is immature.


hey again SS91! smile
i think you are totally right...i have a feeling that that conversation will be coming very soon because this is just getting ridiculous! haha. i'd love to be more serious with him, but if he's not ready for that should i say "we can still be friends but i can't do the 'in-between, flirty, come over and cuddle' stuff. it's too confusing" or should i not even bring up being friends? what do you think?
thank you!! smile you rock!
Posted by ariesgirl402
ariessun - tnx for your supportsmile isn't it funny that most of aries women/scorp men relationships are so similar it's scarryWinking


VERY scary! haha smile good luck with your Scorp AG402. i SO SO hope it works out in the end smile keep us posted!
Posted by *Tasha

----- wowwwwww he still hasn't tried to kiss u?! this ^^^ made me laugh sorry. my friend's scorp didn't kiss her the first 2 dates? b/c he was "intimidated b/c she's so pretty" is what he said...but after that he was over it. and mine kissed me soon as we got back to my house Big Grin save the judgment
that's something i'd expect from a Virgo or someone else kinda shy...u should really find out his moon. idk i wouldn't have the patience for that. fuck that. unless i wasn't physically attracted to him...


glad i made you laugh *Tasha smile haha
yeah, after NINE times...but if he wasn't into me or just wanted to be friends, why would he keep asking me to hang out?! i guess he just doesn't know what he wants....and i REALLY don't think he's shy. he doesn't come off that way at all to me...ugh!
i think he's an Aries moon...and I'm an Aries moon too...what does that mean?! :-/
thank you!!
Posted by starsapphire91
Thanx! You're my favorite Aries on DXPnet!
You should tell it to him in the way you normally would. Yes, my version was rather cutting smile, but you should retain a certain firmness. Maybe tell him, "Look, i really like you, but i'm not too sure if you like me. I don't even think that you're sure if you like me. That's fine, but i would like something more from this. If you can't give me that, or if this just isn't the right time for you, then that's okay too. But, i can't keep doing this "in-between" thing, it's too nerve-racking and stressful. Either we're gonna be in a real relationship, or, we stay platonic friends." He has an aries moon? The scorpio sun + aries moon combo i think would make him a VERY direct person, i know my aries moon does! Jesus, he's acting like a libra! Does he have a libra rising, perhaps?



aww, hahah. thank you! i appreciate that smile i feel like you and i sort of think the same way...so it's nice to see someone else agree with what i think i should do smile thanks!! i so so appreciate your opinion.
yes, i love EXACTLY what you wrote for what i should say to him! that's totally what i want to go for...make it firm and honest, yet laid-back and sort of a no pressure situation...like, i'd like to have you in my life but i don't NEED you kind of thing smile
well, i'm not exactly sure if he has an Aries Moon because i don't know what time of day he was born :-/ ugh! i need to find that out...yeah, i was thinking that he was acting a bit like a libra too! hahah. but he seems a bit more reliable than a libra so i'm not sure...
thank you! smile

Posted by poopsie1
maybe txt him back -
"what do YOU think? Winking" lol



well, i would have said something like that but so many days have passed now! maybe something like, "do you really want me to jump you? because i will...in a sweet/non-slutty way of course." or something like that?? hahah. i really just want to keep things light and easy, but he's so frustrating! i wish he would just tell me what he's thinking already Big Grin
Posted by poopsie1
ok this one for being late -

"sorry for being late. better than never right Tongue. ok my reply to you - yes sexy, why haven't we never made out? why why oh why?" lol


haha, something like that might work! lol. if i don't hear from him by dinner time tomorrow then i'll text him something...i'll keep you posted smile thank you!!
Posted by unsure_aries
Posted by ramfishtwins
Ah...the eternal scorpio issue...it's never going to go away!!
A lot of them are game players. I think it's because they are trying to protect themselves. So, this back and forth could go on for quite some time. As an Aries myself, I could never handle it due to my lack of patience and my hatred of the game itself. He's testing you...that's what they do. Just stand your ground and be a strong Aries and see how it plays out.
Good luck girl...could be a rough ride!!


thank you RFT! ugh, why do they have to be like this?! haha. i think that i actually have pretty good patience/willpower, but i just don't want to get screwed over or effed with, and that's why it's so difficult/annoying to deal with! hah.
yeah, i'm trying to not play the games back anymore...and i've already brought it up twice. do you think he wants me to play games back and be chill/laid-back or stand up to his antics? i just don't know the best route to take?!
thank you!! smile
click to expand


You are very welcome!
And I think some of the lady's responses here are coming from direct experiences with Scorp men and their ways. If you've never had the chance to have a relationship with one, then it's easy to say that we are judging one sign or being hypocrites. I think it's great that he says he doesn't want to jump into sex...BUT, I do believe this is all a part of the big picture (their agenda). It can be common for them to play games and want to be in control, but it's not like this for all. It's difficult for Aries and Scorp because they are always fighting for the power. I do not suggest you play games back. Some like it when you stand up to them...shows you are not weak and they like a strong woman. I think this is why we attract each other so well.
I would sit back and wait for him to contact you...which he will...guaranteed!! Then, just play it cool. If you want to take it to the next level, it looks like you are going to have to put yourself out there and throw the first punch. Winking
Keep up posted!
You are too sweet Poopsie...thanks! LOL
I am serious...why would she keep up with this game? If she sits back and looks like she doesn't care, he will wonder what's up. I agree that she should have responded to that text, but now it's a little late. Like I said...if she wants something more, then she will need to take the reigns and go after it. If not, then leave the game playing to pre-schoolers.
I have had some decent relations with scorps. I'm just stating what they generally do.
I think you need to tone down your love and devotion for us Aries...it's becoming way to much for me to handle HEHEHE!!!
What sign are you by the way?
Posted by starsapphire91
The problem here is not that he wants to wait for sex, it's the fact that he is acting immature. Point blank. I'm sorry, but any man who wants to "Wait" for sex, won't send flirty text messages insinuating that he wants to have sex with you. He keeps on going back and forth, and this kind of "wishy washy" behavior is not somehing i would expect from a 29-almost-30 yr old, it's unacceptable. The fact of the matter here is, HE isn't sure about what he wants, so he needs to grow up and make a fucking decision. If he wants to keep things platonic, then he needs to stop sending flirtacious texts and keep things "friendly". If he wants FWB (which i'm sure he's not interested in), then he needs to quit being a pussy, and tell her to her face. If he wants a relationship, the he needs to tell her as well. I'm sorry, but he needs to state his fucking intentions. Plus, any man who wants to flirt or "talk" to me about sex... had better pick up the goddamn phone and call me! This constant texting is teenage bullshit, i'm 17 and i expect more!



hi SS91!
i must say that you are definitely wise beyond your years, but i'm sure you hear that a lot! smile
and you are right. he is totally immature and has admitted that to me...what am i doing with this guy?! haha. yeah, i think he doesn't know what he wants either and that is the problem/issue at hand. i will keep the flirting or whatever it is going a little bit longer, but once we have that serious conversation again i am going to tell him that i need to at least date him seriously, or no more of the in-between and we'll just be friends. i definitely don't want FWB and i think you're right...i don't think he does either or he might have tried to kiss me by now, who knows.
once again, you ROCK SS91! thank you thank you smile
Posted by poopsie1
I agree Aries women and Scorpios men are not good for each other in general for Aries lack sensitivity, intuition and the ability to understand subtlety which are what water signs are made for.



i kind of feel more Aquarius than Aries...what do you think of Aquarius woman/Scorp man??! smile hopefully that's a little better?! haha
and thank you ariessun as well!! smile
Posted by ariessun
hi ramfishtwin!
poopsie obviously does not know aries peeps all that well..otherwise this person would have never used "fear" and aries in the same breath. the concept of fear does not exist in aries land. not sure that's a GOOD thing, but it is what it is... Winking



Hey there lady!
You are so right about the fear thing...it can be good and very bad depending on the situation smile
I just can't get over her screen name...I keep wanting to call her Poops, but am refraining LOL! Sorry Poops!
Posted by poopsie1
ramfishtwins, I'm a sign of truth, from my perspective as always of course lol.

"what do you think of Aquarius woman/Scorp man??!"
unsure, if your scorp has air in his chart and you have water and earth in yours that would work better unless he has significant fire in him.



I should have known you would give me an evasive answer!
"so i just decided to text him earlier today. i said, "i'm sorry that i haven't texted you sooner. i'm just really confused. do you know who this is? " ----> he knows that it's me, but it's just a little inside joke thing we have when we haven't talked to/seen the other person for a while or one of us has been out of town.
he responds 30 min. later with: "haha whatever. i actually had a crazy dream about you last night" "

This is such a typical response to "i'm just really confused" He completed avoided your confused and went straight to sex!
Posted by ariessun
meh Winking..you're welcome. i have an aqua moon, which i THINK makes it worse with scorp men. i detach so quickly...which is not a good thing when dealing with signs that run on emotion and manipulation, such as the scorp man. he doesn't understand how i can turn tail and not look back. but...we've got "other" issues we're dealing with..or rather he's got an issue that needs to be rectified and so..that's about all i'm gonna say about that. other than it's a dealbreaker and he knows it. so...yea..um..hmmm...anyway...my best advice? err...i have none, really. sorry. Sad


YEAH, i am definitely a detached person! like, i never really ever "miss" people...i guess that's good and bad, i don't know! after breaking up with my boyfriend of 5 years, i found it rather easy to get over him? sad but true Sad maybe i just wasn't in love anymore or maybe it's my detachment issue...whatever it is, i'm not sure what to think of it?! My ex was a Leo btw...
anyways, i hope things are going well with your Scorp man :-/ hopefully he'll man up and realize that he doesn't want to lose you!! keep us posted please!
Posted by starsapphire91
Hey!
I think it may work at some point, but... i think you two might need to take a break from each other for him to really figure his feelings out. To be totally honest, even if you two enter a serious relationship, he might be the type to fear commitment, and that's a whole 'nother headache! I don't really think it's a hidden agenda with him, i don't think he's that aware of his emotions, so i don't think it's that deep. Some women read too far into the behaviors of their Scorpio men, due to stereotypes. Not every Scorpio is filled with intensity and emotional depth. Case in point, your guy seems very flirtacious and airy. Which isn't a bad thing at all, in fact i know it makes him quite charming! But i think he needs to live a little more before he can become more serious about life. Granted, you're younger than him, and far more mature, but men mature slower than women. Yeah... that sucks, but imagine how i feel! I'm 17, and most teenage boys suck! Aw hell, men suck in general! Winking But for now, i think you should start to be a little more serious with him in your communication. If you keep things more serious, maybe a real relationship will bud between you two. I hope this helps some! smile


i think you could be right again! haha. he could definitely be the type to fear commitment, especially now that he's almost 30 and wondering when he is going to get married and what not. and i think you're TOTALLY right about him not having "emotional depth" and being very flirtatious and airy...honestly, i think he just loves having fun and doesn't take life too seriously...which i am SO okay with! i like having fun too and staying out of drama, etc. i just wish i knew what he was thinking about me?! haha smile
man, those teenage boys must be TERRIBLE to deal with for you! i can't even imagine :-/ haha. i think we could be really great friends AND have an amazingly fun relationship and that's what makes this so hard! smile
Scorp Men- genuine or have hidden agenda?


Every person has an agenda that is for thier own benefit, and every person has information about their agenda that they aren't revealing unless it is to their benefit.
Posted by P-Angel
Scorp Men- genuine or have hidden agenda?


Every person has an agenda that is for thier own benefit, and every person has information about their agenda that they aren't revealing unless it is to their benefit.



very true smile can i change the title of the topic i started?! hahah
Posted by machiavelli bull
Always hidden agenda!Alwayssmile



ahh, dangit! that is not what i want to hear?! :-P
I work with two. One's okay, the other's a complete assbag.
Posted by poopsie1
"I just can't get over her screen name...I keep wanting to call her Poops, but am refraining LOL! Sorry Poops!"
Poop or not (LOL) what made you think I'm a her?
I may be her scorp don't you think lol.


Ah...I see! Just an assumption I guess Poopster...
Posted by saywha?
hmm yea..
i'm going through the worst kind of commitment blues ever. Scorp *can* drive me insane day in and day out. Even the parents' meet up has done nothing to calm me... rather heightened every instinct. I feel like I should be listening to my instincts and break into a run. Sad



yeah, i've already met my Scorp's parents too! so weird. i feel the same way you do :-/ like i should just follow my instincts and get the eff away from him...but he just keeps pulling me back and he hasn't technically done anything wrong i guess...it's probably just my own paranoia. but it's just so damn frustrating!!
keep us posted on your Scorp as well please smile good luck!
Posted by saywha?

smile
that sounds great! One thing i do know about scorps is they dont generally hide the ppl they know from their parents. Its nice that he's made them known that a person called you exists in his life. A small step, but sure might lead to bigger things in the future if you both keep up the standard and the fireworks(very imp to a scorp guy) for a long time.
Mine is a little different. Its not just me meeting/talking to his parents, but both of our parents meeting up to talk/discuss. Big Grin... we've known each other for almost 5 yrs, committed 4 of those and long distance except for a stolen couple of months here and there. In june both our parents met up to talk and in the general course of discussion it became evident that his father's younger brother and my father's elder brother have been good friends for more than 10yrs! yea.. we've been blessed with tiny surprises... and both the families are more than eagerly looking forward to our wedding (infact, forcing us to go ahead and tie the knot as quickly as possible..)
Although things are not really as bad as I make it seem, I have been possessed by Paranoia itself. I'm not sure if it is the woman's intuition or pure scare of what the future might hold or how his high and mighty scorpionic azz would inflict hurt upon my naivve, innocent, completely trusting heart Tongue.


i know right?!...i figure meeting his parents MUST be a good thing as well...i think we are moving in the right direction, but in the next 2 weeks or so i'll know for sure where we stand with one another. either he wants to date me and hopefully only me, he just wants FWB (which i don't want), or we'll be platonic friends...that's pretty much it. i'll tell him what i'm looking for and if that's not what he wants then so be it! i won't hold it against him. he's the one missing out smile hehe.
and that is so crazy about them being friends for 10 years! what a small world! smile i know, paranoia is quite the killer huh?! so annoying! well, i hope your Scorp is trustworthy! i really do. i would think if you've known him for 5 years now and been with him for 4, that should be a pretty good sign smile have you set your wedding date yet? and if you don't mind me asking...where do you live? because i do wedding photography! hehe. just throwing it out there smile and what issues do you have with your Scorp? do you think he's cheating or somet
click to expand
oops, sorry Saywha? the post above got posted a little screwy...i messed up when deleting some of your text.

also, i was just thinking...i've hung out with my Scorp 9 times now...i'm not much of a flirt, so maybe i'm not giving off that "come hither" vibe and that's why he hasn't tried to kiss me yet?? just a thought! haha. maybe i need to be more aggressive, but not tooo aggressive smile
Posted by saywha?
Haha smile not yet.. we still have a lot practical issues to work through. hehe, thanks, I would sure like to check out your work but we're not sure.. we'd be getting married in a different country (India)
maybe i need to be more aggressive, but not tooo aggressive smile maybe... but dont be too aggressive too... they like to chase.



thanks saywha!! smile and i will PM you the link to my website if you want to check out my wedding stuff smile it would be amazing to shoot a wedding in India!! Big Grin hehe. How are things going with your Scorp btw?
Posted by Rumi
in an emotional situation, i guess his Moon would become top concern.. risings r facade.. more or less.


Hmm, that makes sense. In which case, we both have an Aries moon...although, I'm still not sure what time of day he was born, so that might change things.
thanks!
Posted by scorpio rising
dont respond...


thanks scorpio rising smile
...think he'll still come around or is it over you think?
Posted by scorpio rising
i really dont know, and honestly this 'mysterious' way that 'scorpios' communicate/or not is just plain weird, i would just come right out with it.........if he contacts you...if he texts you, ask him if he has a voice, when he calls just ask him whatever is on your mind
i just dont agree with walking on eggshells with these guys at all..



yeah, i've already sort of tried that...i put it out there, said i'd love to try dating him or whatever. and nothing really came of it...i don't know how i even let it go on for this long. i'm just too nice i guess! i'll just keep on ignoring/giving the cold shoulder...maybe that will win him over...DUMB.
i just don't get why he was sttttiilllll trying to keep me around and we weren't even hooking up! hadn't even kissed yet or anything...i understand the game playing if you were hooking up and kept wanting to get some from somebody, but we didn't have any of that going on. maybe he is just very insecure...even though he doesn't put off that vibe whatsoever. who the eff knows.
or, he really just wanted to be friends, but why the flirting?! so stupid, hahah.
thank you again smile and yeah, that's good...if he does contact/text me a few more times, i'll ask if he has a voice like you said...maybe tell him to stop being an immature puss and call me. so silly.
Posted by Rumi
I wonder if 'walking on eggshells' is possible for fire signs.. if it does not come naturally, any put on is very easily picked up by scorps...
if it is NOT you.. dont show this face..

its already pretty strange.. why dont make it a bit simple..
cut the crap and be forthright...
just a thought

or you can go another few months with this delicious texting, while both of you enjoy it.




hmm...walking on eggshells...i don't really do that with anyone, even this Scorp. he is a very chill laid-back guy and i don't think anything i would say to him would upset him a bunch or make him super angry or anything like that. i'm real around him and i think he knows that i'm a nice genuine person...too bad he's being an idiot and totally missing out smile
well, i'm done texting him...done making an effort. i deleted his number. and i already cut the crap so to speak. told him i would like to try dating him, but he never really gave me anything back...so obviously, didn't want anything somewhat serious or just wasn't that into me...which is fine by me. he is super cool and fun to hang out with but i don't need a guy to make me happy smile
his loss!! thanks rumi smile

Posted by deemnsout4ever
he's keeping the conversation flowing,stop complaining,woman !!smile



hahaha, i'm not complaining Big Grin i'm super happy that he texted me back!! and i'm glad i put myself out there again...i really wasn't ready to give up on us! smile
Posted by deemnsout4ever
attagirl !!smile

I didn't read through all those posts, but at least you got him to reply to your texts in a timely manner smile



hahah, thanks deem! smile yeah, i definitely take that as a good sign smile
Posted by Mr Nice
This is rubbish, He will be just shy theres no game. He could also be trying to find out how you like him. Advice, but we all know aries hate advice, if you want to give this ago then you make the first move and kiss him. I was like this with may aries I'm a scorp she made the first and were still together it can be a tough relationship because we are a like meaning we both like to be in charge I've gotten around this by letting are think shes in charge. I also tend to give in lol but, its a good challenge and never boring. You also need to know what day of the month he was born? my aries is in early april I don't tend to get along with aries born in late march or late april. Other advice I would give you is don't judge someone becuase your confused by give the a chance. With knowing astrology aries and scorpio not ment to compatible but, if we learn to listen and try to understand each others good and bad traits there could be a good union with both signs.



i know, i think you're right about him trying to find out if i like him...also, i just got out of a 5 year relationship in February. ScorpGirl83 said that he might be really hesitant because of this.
...she also said i should just make the first move because he wants to make sure i'm ready for that smile ahh, it's going to be so difficult, but i will try!
and good job letting your Aries think she's in charge Winking Pretty sure that's the only way a Scorp/Aries relationship can work!! hahah smile i definitely think this relationship would never be boring, which i love smile but we'll see if we can make it work first!
i was born March 23rd and he is November 2nd...when is your bday?
and thank you...i'm trying soooo hard not to judge because of my confusion with him, but man it's difficult! :-/ we just really need to have a good long conversation about everything and clear the confusion. i definitely think communication is key here.
thanks mr nice!! smile
click to expand
Posted by Mr Nice
I definitely think communication is key here. You are right about that but, it just depends how patient you can be. my aries 1st april me 17th nov. If you get fed up find a libra, or auqqies maybe. Hope this helps good luck



thank you, i agree about communication smile i'm trying to be as patient as i can!! smile
eh, not sure how i feel about those Libras! :-P they are pretty difficult smile