Am I interpreting house-ruler aspects correctly?

This topic was created in the Astrology forum by Jarax on Wednesday, April 8, 2020 and has 24 replies.
Using this chart as an example:

User Submitted Image

Am I right to think that because Red has Moon as their 5H ruler and Blue's Venus/Mars/Uranus (which rule their 8th, 7th, and 5th respectively as well as Venus being their chart ruler) make direct conjunctions to it, that it would function the same as those planets sitting in that person's 5th house or activating it in that way?
bump?
Posted by tiziani

I felt like yes at first, but working through it I now feel they’re different.

For example Mars is the 2nd house ruler for Red person. That changes everything. Blue and Red’s perception of a Mars event is going be different.
What would a typical Mars event look like? I'm not sure how to apply 2nd house rulings to Mars either unless it meant aggressively acquiring possessions?
Posted by LaPetiteEtoile

They might feel like Moon/Neptune is pretty illusive too.

This reads like two ships passing in the night.
Yeah. There is a heavy Neptunian vibe to the entire synastry chart along with Red's ASC being in Pisces and their ruling planet (Neptune) being at home in the 12th house. I can see why it would look that way but so far it doesn't quite feel that quick or fleeting. With Neptune and Pluto all over though, I can't tell who has the "upper hand" here or if mutual attraction is even indicated (I'm not sure how strong Eros is in synastry so I didn't really touch on Red's Eros conjunct Blue's Mars and Venus or the Mars/Moon-Venus contacts).
This looks very karmic. A lot of strong connections mixed with important squares and oppositions to personal planets. The difference in style and perception coupled with such strong contact would promote a lot of self awareness. Especially when you consider the house that are directly involved.

Romantic connection like you see in movies is a no go, however. However the kind of synastry is rather strong and I would expect a real kind of love and affection to develop. This is the synastry of life long best friends so long as a romantic relationship isn't forced.
Posted by Lostthoughts

This looks very karmic. A lot of strong connections mixed with important squares and oppositions to personal planets. The difference in style and perception coupled with such strong contact would promote a lot of self awareness. Especially when you consider the house that are directly involved.

Romantic connection like you see in movies is a no go, however. However the kind of synastry is rather strong and I would expect a real kind of love and affection to develop. This is the synastry of life long best friends so long as a romantic relationship isn't forced.


So you think it's more of a friends to lovers kind of vibe but it HAS to happen organically? What hard aspects stick out to you the most?
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

This looks very karmic. A lot of strong connections mixed with important squares and oppositions to personal planets. The difference in style and perception coupled with such strong contact would promote a lot of self awareness. Especially when you consider the house that are directly involved.

Romantic connection like you see in movies is a no go, however. However the kind of synastry is rather strong and I would expect a real kind of love and affection to develop. This is the synastry of life long best friends so long as a romantic relationship isn't forced.


So you think it's more of a friends to lovers kind of vibe but it HAS to happen organically? What hard aspects stick out to you the most?
click to expand

are you one of these people or have a personal stake in this relationship?
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

This looks very karmic. A lot of strong connections mixed with important squares and oppositions to personal planets. The difference in style and perception coupled with such strong contact would promote a lot of self awareness. Especially when you consider the house that are directly involved.

Romantic connection like you see in movies is a no go, however. However the kind of synastry is rather strong and I would expect a real kind of love and affection to develop. This is the synastry of life long best friends so long as a romantic relationship isn't forced.


So you think it's more of a friends to lovers kind of vibe but it HAS to happen organically? What hard aspects stick out to you the most?

are you one of these people or have a personal stake in this relationship?
click to expand
I'm Blue in the chart.
I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊

Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊
So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image
click to expand

change what exactly?
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?
click to expand


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.
click to expand

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?
click to expand


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.
click to expand



Love is love

You can love a friend

You could love a lover

A wife or even ex wife

How it works out is beside the point

There are different kinds of love yet

Love is love

This applies to all range of feelings. I personally would not be involved with someone I couldn't be friends with in the first place. The early cloud9/honeymoon stage fades or calms down eventually. You have to be able to get along and hash things out regardless. I actually use friend ship as a base myself.

Yes I do understand the confusion that happens when your friends are the opposite sex and you find them attractive or vis versa. I prefer female friends. It happens and the outcome had been on both sides of the fense.

Can you give more detail what is going on with both your feelings and the relationship?



Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.


Love is love

You can love a friend

You could love a lover

A wife or even ex wife

How it works out is beside the point

There are different kinds of love yet

Love is love

This applies to all range of feelings. I personally would not be involved with someone I couldn't be friends with in the first place. The early cloud9/honeymoon stage fades or calms down eventually. You have to be able to get along and hash things out regardless. I actually use friend ship as a base myself.

Yes I do understand the confusion that happens when your friends are the opposite sex and you find them attractive or vis versa. I prefer female friends. It happens and the outcome had been on both sides of the fense.

Can you give more detail what is going on with both your feelings and the relationship?
click to expand
The relationship itself is fine on her end. My own feelings however, make it feel strained on my end. I don't think she even suspects anything is wrong (I would never expect a Gemini to realize someone hasn't spoken to them until a large amount of time has passed either way). I do want to have the confidence to still be her friend even when she inevitably ends with someone else. The issue lies in that right now my feelings are stuck in the "what if?" phase? I don't know how she feels because I never asked and she admitted to me that she would rarely ever voice her opinions on how she feels about someone unless it was very sudden or erratic in nature. Sometimes we do have slightly more intimate conversations about how she feels about herself, her insecurities, etc and I want more of that but I don't want to force it either.

I stopped the playful banter entirely. I realized that I didn't always want all of our conversations to go that way so I figured that if I changed, that it might change the nature of our friendship into something more harmonious with the banter just being a backdrop instead of center stage. About a week ago, we did get into a slight argument about how she felt about herself and after I explained a few things to her (giving her my own POV), she initially got upset before calming down and saying it wasn't my fault while telling me she appreciates the different viewpoints I give her (I'm gonna guess that's the Mercury Opp Mercury and Mars playing out). Things are kind of just back to neutral right now.
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.


Love is love

You can love a friend

You could love a lover

A wife or even ex wife

How it works out is beside the point

There are different kinds of love yet

Love is love

This applies to all range of feelings. I personally would not be involved with someone I couldn't be friends with in the first place. The early cloud9/honeymoon stage fades or calms down eventually. You have to be able to get along and hash things out regardless. I actually use friend ship as a base myself.

Yes I do understand the confusion that happens when your friends are the opposite sex and you find them attractive or vis versa. I prefer female friends. It happens and the outcome had been on both sides of the fense.

Can you give more detail what is going on with both your feelings and the relationship?


The relationship itself is fine on her end. My own feelings however, make it feel strained on my end. I don't think she even suspects anything is wrong (I would never expect a Gemini to realize someone hasn't spoken to them until a large amount of time has passed either way). I do want to have the confidence to still be her friend even when she inevitably ends with someone else. The issue lies in that right now my feelings are stuck in the "what if?" phase? I don't know how she feels because I never asked and she admitted to me that she would rarely ever voice her opinions on how she feels about someone unless it was very sudden or erratic in nature. Sometimes we do have slightly more intimate conversations about how she feels about herself, her insecurities, etc and I want more of that but I don't want to force it either.

I stopped the playful banter entirely. I realized that I didn't always want all of our conversations to go that way so I figured that if I changed, that it might change the nature of our friendship into something more harmonious with the banter just being a backdrop instead of center stage. About a week ago, we did get into a slight argument about how she felt about herself and after I explained a few things to her (giving her my own POV), she initially got upset before calming down and saying it wasn't my fault while telling me she appreciates the different viewpoints I give her (I'm gonna guess that's the Mercury Opp Mercury and Mars playing out). Things are kind of just back to neutral right now.
click to expand

have really investigated your feelings for her beyond recognizing them? I go though the "what if" stage multiple times with my female friends until the dust settles on both sides. That includes them wondering themselves. If it happens the same time we end up talking about it with heavy subtext and banter. It's normal.

When you do feel the connection the strongest besides when you are speaking openly. What you described before was her showing emotional vulnerability which is a form of intimacy. You have a soft spot for that don't you? When do you also feel it strongly? Investigating that will tell you the nature of your connection as it is now and also about yourself as well.

I'm sure there is a way for you to talk to her and tell her that you like her and care for her a lot and your curious if there could be romantic potential. Think you could Use banter. First though I would investigate your feeling further like I said above.


P.S. About your comment with Gemini. That isn't quite true. That arch type is the definition of duality. Could befriend you to sleep with your boyfriend or/and seduce your boyfriend to prove to you he is a price of shit. This is why geminis are called shady often. They can happily live in contradiction. Robinhood could very well have been a Gemini as well as thantos. I like geminis 😆

To top it off she has Taurus(in Venus and Saturn no less) who are know for giving space as well as aqua( quite a bit actually) which is known for giving space for very different reasons.
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.


Love is love

You can love a friend

You could love a lover

A wife or even ex wife

How it works out is beside the point

There are different kinds of love yet

Love is love

This applies to all range of feelings. I personally would not be involved with someone I couldn't be friends with in the first place. The early cloud9/honeymoon stage fades or calms down eventually. You have to be able to get along and hash things out regardless. I actually use friend ship as a base myself.

Yes I do understand the confusion that happens when your friends are the opposite sex and you find them attractive or vis versa. I prefer female friends. It happens and the outcome had been on both sides of the fense.

Can you give more detail what is going on with both your feelings and the relationship?


The relationship itself is fine on her end. My own feelings however, make it feel strained on my end. I don't think she even suspects anything is wrong (I would never expect a Gemini to realize someone hasn't spoken to them until a large amount of time has passed either way). I do want to have the confidence to still be her friend even when she inevitably ends with someone else. The issue lies in that right now my feelings are stuck in the "what if?" phase? I don't know how she feels because I never asked and she admitted to me that she would rarely ever voice her opinions on how she feels about someone unless it was very sudden or erratic in nature. Sometimes we do have slightly more intimate conversations about how she feels about herself, her insecurities, etc and I want more of that but I don't want to force it either.

I stopped the playful banter entirely. I realized that I didn't always want all of our conversations to go that way so I figured that if I changed, that it might change the nature of our friendship into something more harmonious with the banter just being a backdrop instead of center stage. About a week ago, we did get into a slight argument about how she felt about herself and after I explained a few things to her (giving her my own POV), she initially got upset before calming down and saying it wasn't my fault while telling me she appreciates the different viewpoints I give her (I'm gonna guess that's the Mercury Opp Mercury and Mars playing out). Things are kind of just back to neutral right now.

have really investigated your feelings for her beyond recognizing them? I go though the "what if" stage multiple times with my female friends until the dust settles on both sides. That includes them wondering themselves. If it happens the same time we end up talking about it with heavy subtext and banter. It's normal.

When you do feel the connection the strongest besides when you are speaking openly. What you described before was her showing emotional vulnerability which is a form of intimacy. You have a soft spot for that don't you? When do you also feel it strongly? Investigating that will tell you the nature of your connection as it is now and also about yourself as well.

I'm sure there is a way for you to talk to her and tell her that you like her and care for her a lot and your curious if there could be romantic potential. Think you could Use banter. First though I would investigate your feeling further like I said above.


P.S. About your comment with Gemini. That isn't quite true. That arch type is the definition of duality. Could befriend you to sleep with your boyfriend or/and seduce your boyfriend to prove to you he is a price of shit. This is why geminis are called shady often. They can happily live in contradiction. Robinhood could very well have been a Gemini as well as thantos. I like geminis 😆

To top it off she has Taurus(in Venus and Saturn no less) who are know for giving space as well as aqua( quite a bit actually) which is known for giving space for very different reasons.
click to expand
I do tend to have a bit of a soft spot for emotional vulnerability. It makes me feel like I'm getting to know parts of someone that everyone doesn't get to see. Outside of that, sometimes when we have intellectual conversations, it feels like we learn from each other. There are also times when we're both just being goofy that I really feel close because we're vibing off of eachother's energy. A few weeks ago we were on call streaming our screens and we did a full read of both our natal charts/synastry and numerology as well as the 16 Personalities Test (ironically this all started from taking a random Harry Potter house test) and it was alot of fun. I felt I learned a bit more about her that day. We found alot of aspects we agreed on (like the Moon/ASC DW) and when we got to aspects that denoted sexual attraction, we both laughed at how the writer phrased it.

I do agree that cheeky banter that can be read between the lines would be the best way opposed to an awkward confession 100% .

PS - And does Taurus Venus ever re-connect or check in lol?
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

I'm going to say something to you And I need you to try and take it very seriously.

We learn and are shaped by our experiences. How we perceive events shapes us. Our interactions with others teach us not only about them but ourselves in the process. Good or bad and positively or negatively is purely a matter of perception and what we make of the outcome of the events.

If you make rushed assumptions and Expectations then play those out with this relationship before you experience it and get a real feel for it, you risk getting it wrong and robbing yourself of something possibly beautiful in its own right. Bias is a trap in astrology.

I specialized myself with chart reading into relationship dynamics and it's effects. I'm big on choice and I recognize people are at different levels of personal development and the spiritual definition of "vibration" is a good term to use here as well. I look at things on paper by default as best case scenario, without more detail. Sometimes personal issues and trama interfere with the relationships with amazing synastry. Awareness of this happens by experiencing this issue or conflict.

I said I don't see a romantic love you see in movies. Definitely real love and effection though. There are different kinds of love. It's a personal choice and based on your own needs and desires in a partner that matter, if and what is right for you.

My personal advice is:

Go find out the right way, without letting your bias that could cloud your judgement though reading the chart. If you want to try for more then what is happening between you two, then that's between you two. There is definalty a real strong connection in the chart. What happens with that is up to you both.


Poke around only when there is a actual problem in your relationship, then experiment with the solutions based on how it relates to your synastry. Otherwise stay away from it😊


So it turns out, I was off by an hour and my planets fall in the 11th. Does that change anything?

User Submitted Image

change what exactly?


Like make the relationship even more friendship-based. Some say 11th represents hopes and wishes so I'm kinda confused.

planet person brings awareness to house person. It's a 2 way street though.

11th house is the social and society house. Stop digging unless there is a problem. I said what I said in comparison to the kind and strength of Venus and mars connections that naturally can lead to strong romantic feelings like you see in the movies. If you reread my post, I state that there is a really strong connections in this synastry. You should reread my post that I said for you to take very seriously. You asked about house lords but uncertain of what aspects and ideas the houses represent is alarming to me.

What's really going though your head and heart regarding this relationship?


Confusion about my feelings and whether my friendship was/is based on ulterior motives this whole time. I actually haven't talked to her in 4 days (no fight, just haven't felt like it). It's almost like I don't want to hear that mutual attraction is impossible but I can accept it at this point (although basing anything entirely on astrology is probably a really bad idea). I'd rather not delude myself.


Love is love

You can love a friend

You could love a lover

A wife or even ex wife

How it works out is beside the point

There are different kinds of love yet

Love is love

This applies to all range of feelings. I personally would not be involved with someone I couldn't be friends with in the first place. The early cloud9/honeymoon stage fades or calms down eventually. You have to be able to get along and hash things out regardless. I actually use friend ship as a base myself.

Yes I do understand the confusion that happens when your friends are the opposite sex and you find them attractive or vis versa. I prefer female friends. It happens and the outcome had been on both sides of the fense.

Can you give more detail what is going on with both your feelings and the relationship?


The relationship itself is fine on her end. My own feelings however, make it feel strained on my end. I don't think she even suspects anything is wrong (I would never expect a Gemini to realize someone hasn't spoken to them until a large amount of time has passed either way). I do want to have the confidence to still be her friend even when she inevitably ends with someone else. The issue lies in that right now my feelings are stuck in the "what if?" phase? I don't know how she feels because I never asked and she admitted to me that she would rarely ever voice her opinions on how she feels about someone unless it was very sudden or erratic in nature. Sometimes we do have slightly more intimate conversations about how she feels about herself, her insecurities, etc and I want more of that but I don't want to force it either.

I stopped the playful banter entirely. I realized that I didn't always want all of our conversations to go that way so I figured that if I changed, that it might change the nature of our friendship into something more harmonious with the banter just being a backdrop instead of center stage. About a week ago, we did get into a slight argument about how she felt about herself and after I explained a few things to her (giving her my own POV), she initially got upset before calming down and saying it wasn't my fault while telling me she appreciates the different viewpoints I give her (I'm gonna guess that's the Mercury Opp Mercury and Mars playing out). Things are kind of just back to neutral right now.

have really investigated your feelings for her beyond recognizing them? I go though the "what if" stage multiple times with my female friends until the dust settles on both sides. That includes them wondering themselves. If it happens the same time we end up talking about it with heavy subtext and banter. It's normal.

When you do feel the connection the strongest besides when you are speaking openly. What you described before was her showing emotional vulnerability which is a form of intimacy. You have a soft spot for that don't you? When do you also feel it strongly? Investigating that will tell you the nature of your connection as it is now and also about yourself as well.

I'm sure there is a way for you to talk to her and tell her that you like her and care for her a lot and your curious if there could be romantic potential. Think you could Use banter. First though I would investigate your feeling further like I said above.


P.S. About your comment with Gemini. That isn't quite true. That arch type is the definition of duality. Could befriend you to sleep with your boyfriend or/and seduce your boyfriend to prove to you he is a price of shit. This is why geminis are called shady often. They can happily live in contradiction. Robinhood could very well have been a Gemini as well as thantos. I like geminis 😆

To top it off she has Taurus(in Venus and Saturn no less) who are know for giving space as well as aqua( quite a bit actually) which is known for giving space for very different reasons.


I do tend to have a bit of a soft spot for emotional vulnerability. It makes me feel like I'm getting to know parts of someone that everyone doesn't get to see. Outside of that, sometimes when we have intellectual conversations, it feels like we learn from each other. There are also times when we're both just being goofy that I really feel close because we're vibing off of eachother's energy. A few weeks ago we were on call streaming our screens and we did a full read of both our natal charts/synastry and numerology as well as the 16 Personalities Test (ironically this all started from taking a random Harry Potter house test) and it was alot of fun. I felt I learned a bit more about her that day. We found alot of aspects we agreed on (like the Moon/ASC DW) and when we got to aspects that denoted sexual attraction, we both laughed at how the writer phrased it.

I do agree that cheeky banter that can be read between the lines would be the best way opposed to an awkward confession 100% .

PS - And does Taurus Venus ever re-connect or check in lol?
click to expand

when you break the pattern of behavior they are use to. When they start missing you they will reach out. That aqua moon though might calm that down further. I have not known someone with a aqua Taurus aspect to really get a feel for it. Honestly I don't think I should comment on it because of this.

That actually sounds like a lot of fun, doing those quizzes together. Doesn't matter how accurate they are so long as you don't put too much stock in them. My favorite ones that have actual scientific credibility is the Myers Briggs test and love languages. Those are pretty accurate so long as your honest with yourself. I've had both of those legitimately change for me over Because I've legitimately change as a person though. Either way great way to get to know someone. I'll keep that in mind for a date.

Astrology one is dangerous because a lot of placements and aspects are not looked at objectively or only the POSSIBLE negative expressions are listed.

A good example of this is moon expecting mars synastry. I read one interpitations that suggested physical violence. Never have I once considered hitting her. Nor are either of us like that low vibration shit. If we were those kind of people, I suppose it could be plausible BUT we are very much not. If you don't know the difference and can't look at these things objectively could sabotage a relationship over it. The Pluto aspects can actually be a good thing if both people express it in a healthy way. Pluto gets so much hate in synastry.

Taurus will check in and check in on you when they miss you because it's been too long it you break pattern. But not until they get attached to you or still interested. Even if not interested anymore and are attached, they will check up and maintain the relationship. Otherwise meh.

Why is trust a issues for you?
Posted by Lostthoughts

That actually sounds like a lot of fun, doing those quizzes together. Doesn't matter how accurate they are so long as you don't put too much stock in them. My favorite ones that have actual scientific credibility is the Myers Briggs test and love languages. Those are pretty accurate so long as your honest with yourself. I've had both of those legitimately change for me over Because I've legitimately change as a person though. Either way great way to get to know someone. I'll keep that in mind for a date.

Astrology one is dangerous because a lot of placements and aspects are not looked at objectively or only the POSSIBLE negative expressions are listed.

A good example of this is moon expecting mars synastry. I read one interpitations that suggested physical violence. Never have I once considered hitting her. Nor are either of us like that low vibration shit. If we were those kind of people, I suppose it could be plausible BUT we are very much not. If you don't know the difference and can't look at these things objectively could sabotage a relationship over it. The Pluto aspects can actually be a good thing if both people express it in a healthy way. Pluto gets so much hate in synastry.

Taurus will check in and check in on you when they miss you because it's been too long it you break pattern. But not until they get attached to you or still interested. Even if not interested anymore and are attached, they will check up and maintain the relationship. Otherwise meh.

Why is trust a issues for you?


I wouldn't say trust is an issue. I'm just wary of people because I've been burned before. I don't think she would do it but you never know. I was dealing with my uncle being hospitalized with blood clots in his lungs a few days ago and she was there for me and told me she loved me very much (which isn't something I'm used to from anyone at any point in my life. At least not that level of receptiveness and emotional comfort) so it definitely makes me want to trust her.
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

That actually sounds like a lot of fun, doing those quizzes together. Doesn't matter how accurate they are so long as you don't put too much stock in them. My favorite ones that have actual scientific credibility is the Myers Briggs test and love languages. Those are pretty accurate so long as your honest with yourself. I've had both of those legitimately change for me over Because I've legitimately change as a person though. Either way great way to get to know someone. I'll keep that in mind for a date.

Astrology one is dangerous because a lot of placements and aspects are not looked at objectively or only the POSSIBLE negative expressions are listed.

A good example of this is moon expecting mars synastry. I read one interpitations that suggested physical violence. Never have I once considered hitting her. Nor are either of us like that low vibration shit. If we were those kind of people, I suppose it could be plausible BUT we are very much not. If you don't know the difference and can't look at these things objectively could sabotage a relationship over it. The Pluto aspects can actually be a good thing if both people express it in a healthy way. Pluto gets so much hate in synastry.

Taurus will check in and check in on you when they miss you because it's been too long it you break pattern. But not until they get attached to you or still interested. Even if not interested anymore and are attached, they will check up and maintain the relationship. Otherwise meh.

Why is trust a issues for you?


I wouldn't say trust is an issue. I'm just wary of people because I've been burned before. I don't think she would do it but you never know. I was dealing with my uncle being hospitalized with blood clots in his lungs a few days ago and she was there for me and told me she loved me very much (which isn't something I'm used to from anyone at any point in my life. At least not that level of receptiveness and emotional comfort) so it definitely makes me want to trust her.
click to expand

She cares :-)

As for being burned. Pretty vague.
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

That actually sounds like a lot of fun, doing those quizzes together. Doesn't matter how accurate they are so long as you don't put too much stock in them. My favorite ones that have actual scientific credibility is the Myers Briggs test and love languages. Those are pretty accurate so long as your honest with yourself. I've had both of those legitimately change for me over Because I've legitimately change as a person though. Either way great way to get to know someone. I'll keep that in mind for a date.

Astrology one is dangerous because a lot of placements and aspects are not looked at objectively or only the POSSIBLE negative expressions are listed.

A good example of this is moon expecting mars synastry. I read one interpitations that suggested physical violence. Never have I once considered hitting her. Nor are either of us like that low vibration shit. If we were those kind of people, I suppose it could be plausible BUT we are very much not. If you don't know the difference and can't look at these things objectively could sabotage a relationship over it. The Pluto aspects can actually be a good thing if both people express it in a healthy way. Pluto gets so much hate in synastry.

Taurus will check in and check in on you when they miss you because it's been too long it you break pattern. But not until they get attached to you or still interested. Even if not interested anymore and are attached, they will check up and maintain the relationship. Otherwise meh.

Why is trust a issues for you?


I wouldn't say trust is an issue. I'm just wary of people because I've been burned before. I don't think she would do it but you never know. I was dealing with my uncle being hospitalized with blood clots in his lungs a few days ago and she was there for me and told me she loved me very much (which isn't something I'm used to from anyone at any point in my life. At least not that level of receptiveness and emotional comfort) so it definitely makes me want to trust her.

She cares :-)

As for being burned. Pretty vague.
click to expand


I will say sometimes she's really weird like today. Yesterday, we were cool but today I ask how her day at work was (she really hates her job and said she was going to quit soon) over text and get no response. Later on when she's streaming a game, I pop into call and nothing is said and it's quiet but when someone else pops in she says hello to them and starts having a conversation with them? I haven't done anything so I'm really confused. I guess this is the dual personality they were talking about? It's just like some days she's her happy normal self and others she's super cold and distant even when last we spoke, she was happy. Even weirder is, sometimes it feels like it's only with me as she'll talk to others just fine.

EDIT: And today it's back to normal. My head hurts lol.
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts
Posted by Jarax
Posted by Lostthoughts

That actually sounds like a lot of fun, doing those quizzes together. Doesn't matter how accurate they are so long as you don't put too much stock in them. My favorite ones that have actual scientific credibility is the Myers Briggs test and love languages. Those are pretty accurate so long as your honest with yourself. I've had both of those legitimately change for me over Because I've legitimately change as a person though. Either way great way to get to know someone. I'll keep that in mind for a date.

Astrology one is dangerous because a lot of placements and aspects are not looked at objectively or only the POSSIBLE negative expressions are listed.

A good example of this is moon expecting mars synastry. I read one interpitations that suggested physical violence. Never have I once considered hitting her. Nor are either of us like that low vibration shit. If we were those kind of people, I suppose it could be plausible BUT we are very much not. If you don't know the difference and can't look at these things objectively could sabotage a relationship over it. The Pluto aspects can actually be a good thing if both people express it in a healthy way. Pluto gets so much hate in synastry.

Taurus will check in and check in on you when they miss you because it's been too long it you break pattern. But not until they get attached to you or still interested. Even if not interested anymore and are attached, they will check up and maintain the relationship. Otherwise meh.

Why is trust a issues for you?


I wouldn't say trust is an issue. I'm just wary of people because I've been burned before. I don't think she would do it but you never know. I was dealing with my uncle being hospitalized with blood clots in his lungs a few days ago and she was there for me and told me she loved me very much (which isn't something I'm used to from anyone at any point in my life. At least not that level of receptiveness and emotional comfort) so it definitely makes me want to trust her.

She cares :-)

As for being burned. Pretty vague.


I will say sometimes she's really weird like today. Yesterday, we were cool but today I ask how her day at work was (she really hates her job and said she was going to quit soon) over text and get no response. Later on when she's streaming a game, I pop into call and nothing is said and it's quiet but when someone else pops in she says hello to them and starts having a conversation with them? I haven't done anything so I'm really confused. I guess this is the dual personality they were talking about? It's just like some days she's her happy normal self and others she's super cold and distant even when last we spoke, she was happy. Even weirder is, sometimes it feels like it's only with me as she'll talk to others just fine.

EDIT: And today it's back to normal. My head hurts lol.
click to expand

talking about the something without new info to make it stimulating gets old. If that is all you do and/or that person doesn't want to talk about those things.....

Don't take it personal.