gemini1689
@gemini1689
14 YearsGemini
Comments: 0 · Posts: 57 · Topics: 18
AQUAS.. please help, Im upset
aquas don't like emotional outbursts, ask around. get your shit together on your own. then when you're feeling better ask him if he has a problem with his gf of 4yrs coming to him for emotional support.
has this happened before?
are you being needy? (you might be without even realising.)
what do you need from him? (guys like to know what's expected of them, especially in emotional matters. otherwise they can't deliver and withdraw even further because you're so disappointed with them they don't know how to move things forward. catch 22.)
has this happened before?
are you being needy? (you might be without even realising.)
what do you need from him? (guys like to know what's expected of them, especially in emotional matters. otherwise they can't deliver and withdraw even further because you're so disappointed with them they don't know how to move things forward. catch 22.)
I agree with Nimbue.
I think: you can't rely on someone else for your happiness. Your boyfriend can be there to support you, of course, but you make it seem like without him you can't make it through. That isn't true. It sounds like you're getting really caught up in this Aqua/your future husband, like he's the center of your world. Don't do that. You're your own person.
He can't seem to keep you happy, let alone make you happy. This is probably making him feel like there isn't anything he can do. What would happen if he did come to see you? Would he be able to cheer you up and calm you? Or would his visit just end in another argument? Be honest with yourself. He probably knows that it won't do any good, so why even go. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you. He's probably frustrated with the situation and wants you to "chill out". Don't add unneeded drama to the situation.
Let him love you his way. You sound like you are in just dire need of him and his love, but when you get it, it is not how you want it. Please, please, try to relax. If you really are this depressed you should probably see a doctor.
I think: you can't rely on someone else for your happiness. Your boyfriend can be there to support you, of course, but you make it seem like without him you can't make it through. That isn't true. It sounds like you're getting really caught up in this Aqua/your future husband, like he's the center of your world. Don't do that. You're your own person.
He can't seem to keep you happy, let alone make you happy. This is probably making him feel like there isn't anything he can do. What would happen if he did come to see you? Would he be able to cheer you up and calm you? Or would his visit just end in another argument? Be honest with yourself. He probably knows that it won't do any good, so why even go. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you. He's probably frustrated with the situation and wants you to "chill out". Don't add unneeded drama to the situation.
Let him love you his way. You sound like you are in just dire need of him and his love, but when you get it, it is not how you want it. Please, please, try to relax. If you really are this depressed you should probably see a doctor.
He's already hinted to you that he thinks your so-called "depression" is instead just a cry for his attention
And if you're only conveinantly "depressed" when he's busy or not around, don't be surprised that he's acting this way towards you
I'm not saying that how he's treating you is right, but moreso just trying to give you a different perspective from his point of view.
To him, you're probably coming off as clingy, demanding & someone who refuses to let him live & give him space when he asks for it.
If this is truly how he sees you, of course he's turned off & this will cause him to further distance/disconnect from you
From your point of view, if you're really not being this way as a cry for attention, I get that it totally sucks that the 1 person you oughta go to (your man) isn't being there for you right now
BUT if that's the case, deal with him later & as for right now, focus on getting yourself together
Instead of waiting on him to be your hero/knight in shining armor, go vent to/lean on other friends/family OR even better, lean on yourself since you oughta be your own best friend.
Don't expect for him to be the key to your happiness. If that's your expectation of him, it's unrealistic & in that case, I don't blaim him for not being willing to take on such a job.
And if you're only conveinantly "depressed" when he's busy or not around, don't be surprised that he's acting this way towards you
I'm not saying that how he's treating you is right, but moreso just trying to give you a different perspective from his point of view.
To him, you're probably coming off as clingy, demanding & someone who refuses to let him live & give him space when he asks for it.
If this is truly how he sees you, of course he's turned off & this will cause him to further distance/disconnect from you
From your point of view, if you're really not being this way as a cry for attention, I get that it totally sucks that the 1 person you oughta go to (your man) isn't being there for you right now
BUT if that's the case, deal with him later & as for right now, focus on getting yourself together
Instead of waiting on him to be your hero/knight in shining armor, go vent to/lean on other friends/family OR even better, lean on yourself since you oughta be your own best friend.
Don't expect for him to be the key to your happiness. If that's your expectation of him, it's unrealistic & in that case, I don't blaim him for not being willing to take on such a job.
Plus men are problem-solvers.
Simply telling him that your hormones are raging or that you're depressed & don't know why isn't gonna help him & leaves him to feel powerless.
If he doesn't even know the source of your unhappiness/depression, there's no way for him to fix it or come to your aid, especially if no matter what he says/does, doesn't seem to be helping you feel better.
If your depression is THAT bad, see a doctor. Yes, your boyfriend is there to help you cope with life's issues, BUT he's NOT a doctor or your therapist.
I'm sure he has his own problems & issues to deal with too. Sometimes it's not that he may not wanna hear it, but moreso that he doesn't know how to help you. So instead of driving himself nuts & feeling like he's damned if he does & damned if he doesn't, it's easier for him to detach & put some distance there.
It never makes sense to the person whose depressed but it makes a world of sense to the people on the outside looking in
Simply telling him that your hormones are raging or that you're depressed & don't know why isn't gonna help him & leaves him to feel powerless.
If he doesn't even know the source of your unhappiness/depression, there's no way for him to fix it or come to your aid, especially if no matter what he says/does, doesn't seem to be helping you feel better.
If your depression is THAT bad, see a doctor. Yes, your boyfriend is there to help you cope with life's issues, BUT he's NOT a doctor or your therapist.
I'm sure he has his own problems & issues to deal with too. Sometimes it's not that he may not wanna hear it, but moreso that he doesn't know how to help you. So instead of driving himself nuts & feeling like he's damned if he does & damned if he doesn't, it's easier for him to detach & put some distance there.
It never makes sense to the person whose depressed but it makes a world of sense to the people on the outside looking in
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