Can a aqua woman be a aries man?

This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by mahogany2 on Wednesday, April 6, 2011 and has 10 replies.
I am a happy aqua woman who wants a depressed aries man that I use to date 12 years ago. He is depressed because he is not where he want to be financially and his divorce was final 1 year ago. Some people say i come off as though financially I am great but I am not and he did not ask me that . And I do not focus on my have nots I try to be happy with what I got. He disappeared after talking for about a month and that is normally me and I can not take it.
But I want to know can I an aqua female bring him out of his depression the aries man?
Sorry can she be with an aries man?
I know that its not my job to fix him mainly because I am not together myself. But do I call every now and then just to check on him as a friend or just walk away from him completely?
I'm going to tell you this as my Aries moon.
YES,he neeeeds you.
Aries NEEDS that push..that something thats going to light that fire inside us to get us going.BUT the trick is you cant do it,HE has to find it himself,you can only guide him back into that way of thinking/feeling if that makes sense.Don't try to force it,it has to be natural he has to forget the troubles & learn how to be optimistic try to make him feel like a boss & regain his strength but don't be so obvious!Good luck smile
^^
Oh & work you're way into being his lover IF thats what you feel LOVE can heal all wounds but don't give all yourself to him for YOUR safety! smile
Ok, thanks.
You can't withdrawl what he's NOT willing/ready to deposit.
If he's not ready yet to fully invest himself in you or a new relationship just yet, don't take it so personal. It's not you, it's him. And if you care about him so deeply, you'll back off enough so that he'll have time to get himself together. Besides, he won't be excited about fulfilling anything long-term with you until HE gets himself together & until HE knows that he's coming into the situation being the best man that he can be OR until he gets back to where he used to be.
It's great that you aren't knocking him for his current circumstances, BUT he IS. So respect that his ability to commit entirely depends on how he defines his manhood. And like most men, how financially AND emotionally stable they are is what determines whether or not they feel in the "mood" to start a commitment with someone else.
There's really nothing you can do to bring him out of his depression. Sure, you can be there for him, listen to him vent, & support him that might help. But ultimately HE is the 1 who has to be ready to lift himself out of this depression. And he must 1st acknowledge the source of his true depression before he OR you can reap the fruits/benefits of that.
The after-math of divorces can be rough. It takes some people (especially men) long periods of time to fully heal & get over a previous marriage, especially if they lost alot financially or emotionally during the marriage. And other women being in his face & asking him for commitment (even if they're great women) just over complicate things b/c it adds more things to his plate.
I understand & I have stepped back and I havent heard from him in 5weeks until I text him and said "R u ok? Just checking." And he did respond to say that he has been working alot. Then he called and said the samething and that he will call me back. I don't know if he locked my number in or if he just caught my voice and now it has been a week and he haven't called back so I want be calling anymore. I thought about calling every now and then but I am having second thoughts about that.
The main thing is that I have backed off.
Posted by mahogany2

The main thing is that I have backed off.


Good. I know it sucks & I know he's left you feeling confused & wanting answers, BUT this is the part where whether or not you end up further confused/heartbroken is all on YOU & in YOUR hands. You see the bigger picture...you can either walk away & just hope that he'll be back or you can stay around & take the risk (a risk he didn't ask you to take) that you'll end up regretting the fact that you stayed around & took that risk.
Either way, don't take his distance so personal. Don't make his pain/depression about you. That wouldn't be fair to him. He's emotionally unavailable. Emotionally unavailable people do exactly as you described this guy as doing...they come on strong temporarily & then poof! They're gone...they come hard with a few sweet words/promises, you fall for it & then before you can even blink, they disappear & leave you wondering. And by the time you're finally fed up & want answers, that person doesn't feel obligated to give them to you b/c they can always technically say that you didn't have to stay around or that "you knew what you were getting yourself into."
When a man tells you who he is (even if temporarily), BELIEVE HIM! Don't argue with it. Don't try to change him. Don't try to sell yourself in hopes of thinking that showing him how golden/loyal you are will somehow erase his depression.
What you're ultimately asking him to do is focus on you, but he can't b/c he's focused more on his depression. And trust me, you shouldn't want 1/2 of him or the "worst" of him. If anything, for YOUR sake, back off & don't be so willing to come back UNTIL he can be the man that HE needs to be & that you deserve....if you sign up for love during a time when someone is only 1/2 prepared to give their all, 1/2 is exactly what you'll get! (And of course half is not good enough)
dated one...the only thing i cannot stand is their child-like behavior during arguments.logical fallacies all over the place.