Do Aqua's have big foreheads?

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Freebird
@Freebird
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Alien

Sure, it seems easy being a space alien. You've got your x-ray
vision, your late model space ships and media coverage galore. But,
as usual with most glamour jobs, there's a lot of nitty gritty work
the public doesn't get to see. The job can become routine, and even
a bit tedious, as we learned when we stumbled upon this intriguing
page from...

S P A C E A L I E N ' S L O G B O O K

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8:15 AM Leave asteroid for work.

9:00 AM Hover over cornfield on outskirts of small Midwestern town.

9:30 AM Land in backyard where housewife is hanging laundry.
Silence barking dog with penetrating gaze.

10:00 AM Stun housewife with laser-gun or energy pulsating finger-
tips. Levitate her body just long enough to be glimpsed by a passing
motorist. Materialize the body inside spaceship.

Remove internal organs; weigh, label and categorize. Return most, if
not all, to the body. Erase all traces of surgery.

Rematerialize housewife in backyard. Turn back time two hours. Bid
enigmatic good-bye. Leave.

1:00 PM Visit once prestigious astronomer who everyone thinks has
gone mad. Deliver pep talk. Leave him fist-sized fragments of an
unidentifiable element.

2:15 PM Drop by Whitley Strieber's house, pick up royalty check from
best seller. Communion.

3:00 PM It's Saturday; Beam Mulder psychic impressions where to go
next.

3:20 PM Hover over southwestern desert.

3:30 PM Offer psychotic drifter a lift.

4:30 PM Pose for cover of "Weekly World News" with Pres. Bush,
Discuss ozone depletion, space travel, scandal evasion, future
political endorsements.

6:30 PM Back at the asteroid. Introduce psychotic drifter to other
aliens. Listen to Windham Hill.

9:00 PM Dinner. Eat drifter.

10:00 PM Wash antennae, brush eyeballs, peel off outer layer of
skin. Beam cryptic message to NASA satellite. Lights out.