marchpisces7036
@marchpisces7036
12 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 9 · Topics: 1
Do I have to give my Aquarius time and space?
it further. I went to school for computer programming so I was able to easily find her main Facebook account and log into an email she was using to pretend to be me. She was on dating sites and messaging guys, doing all sorts of craziness.
I had planned on figuring out how far deep this girl was going with my identity and then taking any legal means necessary after the holidays to put this to an end. I didn't tell my Aquarius about what I found out because he was already so sketched out and untrusting I wanted to wait.
Well, of course, he gets on my computer yesterday when I'm running errands and finds that girls' email account open and just assumes its mine. When I came back all of my belongings were in trash bags and he told me "it wasnt up for discussion". I tried to explain the situation but he wanted to hear none of it. He told me he didn't believe me and that it was over. So now I'm dealing with a break up AND this stalker at the same time.
I'm devastated to lose my Aquarius. I don't understand how you can spend every day for months with someone and still not trust them. Why would he think I would ever be involved in any thing like this when he's with me every single day and knows my life/routine/etc? We've been inseparable for months and I don't think it's fair I gave him a second chance when he blatantly lied to me several times regarding his loyalty and other girls but when my trust is questioned I'm immediately discarded? Only a few hours before everything happened he was telling me how much he loved me and was planning for our future.
I sent several messages to him today on Facebook asking him to give our relationship a new start without all the internet drama. As a Pisces, I'm very laidback and so I've never dealt with this kind of up and down rollercoaster before with dating. I love him so much, even despite all the B.S., but I feel like I have lost him. I saw he read my messages but he never responded. He got back on OK Cupid the same day we broke up. An hour after we broke up he tweeted, "What am I supposed to do with $ 100 worth of bath products?" those were my Christmas gifts - then he posted a pic of him in the bathtub with them. It's all just so hurtful and mean. Do I have to just give him time and space to come around? Is his mind definitely set on staying broken up? Or should I just forget all about him?
I had planned on figuring out how far deep this girl was going with my identity and then taking any legal means necessary after the holidays to put this to an end. I didn't tell my Aquarius about what I found out because he was already so sketched out and untrusting I wanted to wait.
Well, of course, he gets on my computer yesterday when I'm running errands and finds that girls' email account open and just assumes its mine. When I came back all of my belongings were in trash bags and he told me "it wasnt up for discussion". I tried to explain the situation but he wanted to hear none of it. He told me he didn't believe me and that it was over. So now I'm dealing with a break up AND this stalker at the same time.
I'm devastated to lose my Aquarius. I don't understand how you can spend every day for months with someone and still not trust them. Why would he think I would ever be involved in any thing like this when he's with me every single day and knows my life/routine/etc? We've been inseparable for months and I don't think it's fair I gave him a second chance when he blatantly lied to me several times regarding his loyalty and other girls but when my trust is questioned I'm immediately discarded? Only a few hours before everything happened he was telling me how much he loved me and was planning for our future.
I sent several messages to him today on Facebook asking him to give our relationship a new start without all the internet drama. As a Pisces, I'm very laidback and so I've never dealt with this kind of up and down rollercoaster before with dating. I love him so much, even despite all the B.S., but I feel like I have lost him. I saw he read my messages but he never responded. He got back on OK Cupid the same day we broke up. An hour after we broke up he tweeted, "What am I supposed to do with $ 100 worth of bath products?" those were my Christmas gifts - then he posted a pic of him in the bathtub with them. It's all just so hurtful and mean. Do I have to just give him time and space to come around? Is his mind definitely set on staying broken up? Or should I just forget all about him?
Posted by marchpisces7036
I'm Ever since we started dating, though, there has been nothing but secrets and lying, mostly involving other girls.
I found out months after we became "official" that he was sexting with a couple friends, even asked one out on a date.
Still, though, I decided to look past the major red flags, lying, lack of communication, etc
Oh, baby girl, there are red flags for a reason!!!! You recognized them, yet you continued to want to be in a relationship with him—? What's up with that. Where is your self esteem? Obviously, this guy's actions aren't matching his words. Aquarius is one to show love through actions and what are his actions telling you?
As far as space, we give them space to recharge, do their hobbies, spend time with their family and friends, rest and relax so they can recharge and come back to us more committed than before. We DON'T give them space to be a horn dog with other women!!!!
Oh, and good luck with the stalker chick - hunt her down and smack her across the head! Get a handle on that and nip it in the bud now before she does any more damage to you. If he were committed to you and really loved you, he would believe you and help you with tracking this crazy bitch down and putting her in her place.
I agree with the above poster, this guy isn't worth your time, tears or attention!!!!!!
Don't be offended by me calling you baby girl. I didn't mean anything by it. My BFF is 42 and I call her baby girl because she's younger than me (like a baby sister).
Sounds to me he likes his internet life better than you.
Run far far away.
Run far far away.
*Waves at aquasnoz*
Posted by marchpisces7036
I'm a Pisces female and have been dating an Aquarius male for 8 months. We're both in our late 20s. We have had an amazing relationship so far for the most part. We're more compatible than any other match I've been in, have an incredible sex life, and I really thought this is someone I could spend the rest of my life with. Ever since we started dating, though, there has been nothing but secrets and lying, mostly involving other girls. I found out months after we became "official" that he was sexting with a couple friends, even asked one out on a date. When I confronted him he tried to avoid talking about it and absolutely hates confrontation. He denied everything, even though I saw the messages with my own eyes. Still, though, I decided to look past the major red flags, lying, lack of communication, etc because I felt like we were so great in other ways. He told me he loved me so much and that I was amazing and that he would never do anything to mess it up. He had told me he had been cheated on in the past so I always made it a point to be as open and honest about everything and everyone in my life, even giving him the password to my computer if he cared to look.
One of the major problems is that he focuses too much on the internet. He's addicted to his phone/computer and won't let it out of his sight for even a second. We both work as freelancers and work online sometimes 12 hours a day each and we're both prone to be the type to live more 'in our heads' than outside of it, at times, if that makes sense. In person, together, we have the best relationship. But in the internet world he lets social media and other people affect how he feels.
There was a recent situation where a girl who used to stalk me in college resurfaced. She made a bunch of fake FB accounts and was contacting my boyfriend and other people I knew pretending to be people I worked with. Why, I still have no idea. At first neither my bf or I knew these were catfish accounts and I guess he was talking to these accounts everyday sometimes, mostly about me and our relationship. Why he was talking to these "people" about us or me I don't know. When we found out in the past month it was the girl I knew, my Aquarius accused me of being involved and not believing me. He even went as far as to contact an ex of mine to "verify" parts of my story. Eventually, though, he decided he beli
ok the underlined is his problem right there. He takes too much stock on what people outside your relationship feels. It's not about having online /internet work since you both are into it. You're a computer programmer, so that's part of your career/job/work.
He wouldnt be moved at all from what other people say online. Not one bit. If he cared/loved you. Internet or not.
He wouldnt be moved at all from what other people say online. Not one bit. If he cared/loved you. Internet or not.
it's the same if he had a social circle in real life. If he cared so much about what other think/feel, then he's not worth your time. He's love of life is the entire world, because he cares about what they feel/think.
Thanks for everyone's thoughts. I really appreciate it. He still hasn't responded to my messages or email and I'm guessing, probably won't.
For what its worth, I do understand your pain.
😢
😢
So very sad to hear this. I had a similar situation with my Aquarius ex. You are definitely better off without him. It hurts so much at first but after a little while you will wake up one day and be surprised at how much better you feel when you aren't being lied to and disrespected.
My Aqua ex had the same obsession with his phone and computer. He never let them out of his sight either. When I finally got the courage to look at his old phone when he got a new one he had been sexting, texting and trying to meet up with tons of girls.
Please choose yourself and try to get over him!
My Aqua ex had the same obsession with his phone and computer. He never let them out of his sight either. When I finally got the courage to look at his old phone when he got a new one he had been sexting, texting and trying to meet up with tons of girls.
Please choose yourself and try to get over him!
Wow. This is 1 of those situations where it's really NOT what it looks like!!
1 question: Was he upset b/c you kept your new revelations from him OR was he upset b/c he believed that all of those profiles were really yours?!
If he's just upset about the fact that you didn't tell him about the new revelations, then I can understand him being a little frustrated & perhaps wanting to have the "talk" with you about you both being more open & sharing with each other. If this was the case, than yeah his reaction was a little too extreme.
On the other hand, if he broke it off b/c he believed that those were profiles that YOU secretly created, then I can kind of understand why he flipped. Put yourself in his shoes. There were already trust issues in the relationship. If you came home & found what seemed to be like clear evidence that your man was all on dating sites with profiles with HIS info and pics on it, you'd probably flip too, & especially if he'd been lecturing/accusing you of being unfaithful in the past.
However, I think this is the perfect time for you to sit back & reflect on the relationship. There's NO trust. There was no trust before this even happened. He didn't trust you back then either, not b/c you'd done anything to lose his trust before but b/c people like him with trust issues won't trust you regardless & are looking for any little thing you do wrong or out of sequence to say HA! I caught you! to justify their insecurities to themselves.
You already know what I'm gonna say. Without trust you have nothing. So if he does decide to speak to you again, make sure that your goal isn't getting back into the relationship just for the sake of having security knowing that you have the "title" back. Demand that the trust be worked on & restored FIRST b/c trust issues never really go away unless dealt with.
If you told him the truth & know in your heart that you did all that you could do to try explaining things to him, then you don't have a choice but to give him space. He may or may not come back. If he's still cheating (emotionally, physically or cyber) then it'll take him even longer to come back if he even comes back at all b/c he'll be too busy looking for women to distract him. He did it during the relationship & now that it's been called off, he'll probably do it now, & won't feel bad b/c now he wouldn't technically be cheating b/c you guys aren't together anymore.
1 question: Was he upset b/c you kept your new revelations from him OR was he upset b/c he believed that all of those profiles were really yours?!
If he's just upset about the fact that you didn't tell him about the new revelations, then I can understand him being a little frustrated & perhaps wanting to have the "talk" with you about you both being more open & sharing with each other. If this was the case, than yeah his reaction was a little too extreme.
On the other hand, if he broke it off b/c he believed that those were profiles that YOU secretly created, then I can kind of understand why he flipped. Put yourself in his shoes. There were already trust issues in the relationship. If you came home & found what seemed to be like clear evidence that your man was all on dating sites with profiles with HIS info and pics on it, you'd probably flip too, & especially if he'd been lecturing/accusing you of being unfaithful in the past.
However, I think this is the perfect time for you to sit back & reflect on the relationship. There's NO trust. There was no trust before this even happened. He didn't trust you back then either, not b/c you'd done anything to lose his trust before but b/c people like him with trust issues won't trust you regardless & are looking for any little thing you do wrong or out of sequence to say HA! I caught you! to justify their insecurities to themselves.
You already know what I'm gonna say. Without trust you have nothing. So if he does decide to speak to you again, make sure that your goal isn't getting back into the relationship just for the sake of having security knowing that you have the "title" back. Demand that the trust be worked on & restored FIRST b/c trust issues never really go away unless dealt with.
If you told him the truth & know in your heart that you did all that you could do to try explaining things to him, then you don't have a choice but to give him space. He may or may not come back. If he's still cheating (emotionally, physically or cyber) then it'll take him even longer to come back if he even comes back at all b/c he'll be too busy looking for women to distract him. He did it during the relationship & now that it's been called off, he'll probably do it now, & won't feel bad b/c now he wouldn't technically be cheating b/c you guys aren't together anymore.
...If this guy was perfect before all of this then I'd tell you to be persistent & not give up. But this guy has got a lot of nerve leaving you high & dry when he was just before talking about loyalty. Trust me, you need this time apart.
As for the stalker situation, start documenting your proof. Don't threaten her with anything. If she suspects that you'll finally get the law involved, she'll try to cover her tracks & then boom, you won't have a sturdy case.
Once you get the legal process started (which you SHOULD!) & get things in writing & have started a legal trail, then perhaps you can send it to your Aquarius so that he knows that you wouldn't have went through all of this to take somebody down (the stalker) & make this all up just to keep him. In order for him to believe that you'd go through with all of that just to cover a lie means that he probably didn't think high of you beforehand!
Give him some space. Reflect. Gather evidence & prosecute your stalker & pray that if it's meant to be, it will be.
As for the stalker situation, start documenting your proof. Don't threaten her with anything. If she suspects that you'll finally get the law involved, she'll try to cover her tracks & then boom, you won't have a sturdy case.
Once you get the legal process started (which you SHOULD!) & get things in writing & have started a legal trail, then perhaps you can send it to your Aquarius so that he knows that you wouldn't have went through all of this to take somebody down (the stalker) & make this all up just to keep him. In order for him to believe that you'd go through with all of that just to cover a lie means that he probably didn't think high of you beforehand!
Give him some space. Reflect. Gather evidence & prosecute your stalker & pray that if it's meant to be, it will be.
Yes and how does one know that someone didnt hack into this guys his computer and 'hijack' (waves) the machine to reply to said girls catprofile by pretending to be him in order to split the couple up?
Could it be that this someone is tyring to prove himself right coz this someone likes being right always and seems to set things up so that this could happen time and time again-also time after time (which is a good song by the way)
Could it be that this someone is tyring to prove himself right coz this someone likes being right always and seems to set things up so that this could happen time and time again-also time after time (which is a good song by the way)
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Anyone or someone?
Anyone or someone?
I really appreciate everyone's thoughts on the subject. I talked to my uncle about the stalker (he used to be a cop) and he said there isn't a whole lot I can do because catfishing people (creating fake FB profiles) isn't against the law in our state, the identity theft she's doing can't be used against her because I hacked into her email, which is a crime in itself, so that evidence wouldn't hold up in court. He said regarding getting her for stalking it would be difficult because she's never threatened me or said anything malicious directly to me. So frustrating.
My Aquarius still refuses to answer me on any of the messages or emails I've sent expressing my feelings and thoughts, except to tell me he knew the evidence I got in the email wouldn't hold up in court. I asked him to just let me know where his thoughts were - if he was willing to work it out/talk about everything or if I should just move on. I know, I know, everyone keeps telling me I should have dumped him months ago considering everything but it's hard. I love him. Still, even with that, just asking him to let me know where his head was at I saw he read the message but hasn't responded. He hates being pushed for answers, likes doing things when he's thought about them for awhile, and I understand, we both need time to reflect, but I'm the kind of person I only offer someone a second chance for so long before I disappear and then once that emotion is cut off they're pretty much dead to me. haha
My Aquarius still refuses to answer me on any of the messages or emails I've sent expressing my feelings and thoughts, except to tell me he knew the evidence I got in the email wouldn't hold up in court. I asked him to just let me know where his thoughts were - if he was willing to work it out/talk about everything or if I should just move on. I know, I know, everyone keeps telling me I should have dumped him months ago considering everything but it's hard. I love him. Still, even with that, just asking him to let me know where his head was at I saw he read the message but hasn't responded. He hates being pushed for answers, likes doing things when he's thought about them for awhile, and I understand, we both need time to reflect, but I'm the kind of person I only offer someone a second chance for so long before I disappear and then once that emotion is cut off they're pretty much dead to me. haha
If you know he hates being pushed then why are you pushing him?
Sounds to me your gathering more evidence to try to use against him, again this wont work.
Why coz you have no basis for anything related to these messages, or posts, or anything else on dxpnet.com or other virtual worlds where you may be lurking upon.
Save them but they can never be held against coz basically they have no basis.
This is why you write in a different way then what would be normal to deflect from who you really are.
Again there is no basis for your 'concern' in saving these messages or pushing for answers when its not welcome
Why coz you have no basis for anything related to these messages, or posts, or anything else on dxpnet.com or other virtual worlds where you may be lurking upon.
Save them but they can never be held against coz basically they have no basis.
This is why you write in a different way then what would be normal to deflect from who you really are.
Again there is no basis for your 'concern' in saving these messages or pushing for answers when its not welcome
I am merely questioning your typo's
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Posted by truecap
*Waves at aquasnoz*
hey hey truecap! 😄
@op: It sucks it really does, props to trying to make it work but I'm going with truecap here those are some major red flags you mentioned. Personally I never really trust people who have different online and offline personalities.
In another twist of oddness I received a message this morning from my stalker I even received a message on my blog admitting to everything, apologizing profusely, and begging me to not get the police involved. She said she was "going through a rough time" because her boyfriend dumped her earlier this year? So so weird.
@ceu He accidentally left his Facebook open one day on my computer and I saw the messages.
@mfwb55 I think you're not understanding what I said. I wasn't and am not gathering evidence against HIM. I'm gathering evidence against my stalker who has been using my photos and creating fake accounts to talk to my Aquarius and people I know. The only thing I'm trying to do with my Aquarius is talk to him about the situation in which he thinks I may have been responsible for, when I have solid evidence I'm not. And while I know he might not like to be pushed I don't think it's asking too much of the person I spent the past 8 months with in a serious relationship planning a future with to simply talk to me and discuss everything going on like adults.
@ceu He accidentally left his Facebook open one day on my computer and I saw the messages.
@mfwb55 I think you're not understanding what I said. I wasn't and am not gathering evidence against HIM. I'm gathering evidence against my stalker who has been using my photos and creating fake accounts to talk to my Aquarius and people I know. The only thing I'm trying to do with my Aquarius is talk to him about the situation in which he thinks I may have been responsible for, when I have solid evidence I'm not. And while I know he might not like to be pushed I don't think it's asking too much of the person I spent the past 8 months with in a serious relationship planning a future with to simply talk to me and discuss everything going on like adults.
Posted by size zero superhero
I can't believe this guy would react in such a drastic manner without hearing you out first, considering you've found evidence to suggest he sexts & asks other girls out in the past...and he wouldn't discuss it with you when confronted! But you forgave him nevertheless.
Now that the tables have turned and it's you who needs to clear the air, he absolutely refuses to give you the chance.
As much as I hate to be the bearer of bad news...how do you know he's not using this as some convenient excuse to actually follow through with the receiving end of those sexts and once he's had his fun, come back and say "okay, now I'm ready to talk". Not that farfetched considering the manipulation tactics he's employed thus far.
All I'm saying is, keep an eye out. Also, I genuinely hope you nip that stalker situation in the bud. That sounds terribly disturbing.
Maybe he's tired of the drama and this is the excuse to get out. ??
Just sounds like there's a lot of drama involved in this relationship, and I suspect there's a lot more that we haven't been told.
My stalker said the reasoning behind creating fake accounts and talking to me and my boyfriend and other people I know was "to make sure I'm in a good relationship and happy." What!? Kay, so why use my personal photos and pretend to be me on different websites? I'm so creeped out!
Posted by marchpisces7036
My stalker said the reasoning behind creating fake accounts and talking to me and my boyfriend and other people I know was "to make sure I'm in a good relationship and happy." What!? Kay, so why use my personal photos and pretend to be me on different websites? I'm so creeped out!
woah.
um why? Does she love you?
That's kind of a very ......interesting obsession. Lol
i've had that happen to me before, but in a different context.
Damn. I dont know how to take that though. Most say it's obsession and fatal attraction.
Screw your Aquarius man, it's the other woman that you have to look at.
He's just the totem to what's REALLY happening. O_O
Damn. I dont know how to take that though. Most say it's obsession and fatal attraction.
Screw your Aquarius man, it's the other woman that you have to look at.
He's just the totem to what's REALLY happening. O_O
Posted by marchpisces7036
My stalker said the reasoning behind creating fake accounts and talking to me and my boyfriend and other people I know was "to make sure I'm in a good relationship and happy." What!? Kay, so why use my personal photos and pretend to be me on different websites? I'm so creeped out!
That's just the stalker's misdirected rational of why she's doing it. They convince themselves they have a valid reason for what they do.
Naw there's way more to the story. He was looking for a way out & he found one.
@Ceu: You're absolutely correct about trust. There's no such thing as 1/4 or 80.6% trust lol It's either there or it's not. It can be restored sometimes, BUT 2 people have to get real about the truth & own it FIRST!
Let this guy go. I get that you love him, but love itself is not enough. The 3 major components that make relationships work & survive are communication, trust, & forgiveness. Your relationship was lacking all 3, therefore making that relationship more of a liability than it was an asset. Simply "loving" someone won't change that fact; it'll just make things worse
@Ceu: You're absolutely correct about trust. There's no such thing as 1/4 or 80.6% trust lol It's either there or it's not. It can be restored sometimes, BUT 2 people have to get real about the truth & own it FIRST!
Let this guy go. I get that you love him, but love itself is not enough. The 3 major components that make relationships work & survive are communication, trust, & forgiveness. Your relationship was lacking all 3, therefore making that relationship more of a liability than it was an asset. Simply "loving" someone won't change that fact; it'll just make things worse
If your stalker admitted in writing that she in fact did all of these things, then save it! When it's in writing from the original source, it's no longer he-said/she-said.
Get her to admit everything. Write her back & go down the list 1 by 1 & have her admit to everything. If you are just dead-set on still chasing your Aquarius (since you're gonna do what you wanna do anyways) then forward him the conversation. If he gets proof but yet still refuses to talk to you, then yeah he was already looking for a way out & if that's the case, then hold the door open for him. If that's the case, then he did you a huge FAVOR by walking away
It never hurts to save that proof anyway. Save it for a rainy day. Who knows, things might escalate in the future to her threatening harm on you & it'll help if you already had a paper trail on this chick.
And while you're writing her back, make sure to NOT mention that what she's doing isn't technically illegal. Let her think that what she's doing is illegal. She freaked out & apologized b/c she, like most people, automatically assume that doing those things are illegal. I'd even take it a step further & tell her that you've already got the authorities involved & that she will be arrested for stalking, false impersonation, slander, etc. if she continues. That oughta stop her =)
Get her to admit everything. Write her back & go down the list 1 by 1 & have her admit to everything. If you are just dead-set on still chasing your Aquarius (since you're gonna do what you wanna do anyways) then forward him the conversation. If he gets proof but yet still refuses to talk to you, then yeah he was already looking for a way out & if that's the case, then hold the door open for him. If that's the case, then he did you a huge FAVOR by walking away
It never hurts to save that proof anyway. Save it for a rainy day. Who knows, things might escalate in the future to her threatening harm on you & it'll help if you already had a paper trail on this chick.
And while you're writing her back, make sure to NOT mention that what she's doing isn't technically illegal. Let her think that what she's doing is illegal. She freaked out & apologized b/c she, like most people, automatically assume that doing those things are illegal. I'd even take it a step further & tell her that you've already got the authorities involved & that she will be arrested for stalking, false impersonation, slander, etc. if she continues. That oughta stop her =)
@krysrenee7 I know you're right.
We talked a little bit about everything today and he wouldn't own up to any of the sexting and flirting with girls from the past. When I told him it just seemed like he was looking for a way out considering, to me, it seemed like our relationship had been going so great lately and I didn't understand why he would break up so quickly, he denied wanting a way out and told me he was planning on asking me to move in with him soon but said he just didn't trust me regarding the fake FB accounts. He said he'd only consider getting together again if the girl was in hand cuffs. Which, to be honest, after talking to the police today there doesn't seem to be a whole lot I can do as there are no laws against catfishing and she didn't use my identity to gain anything. So there it is. I just have to let him go. *sigh* Relationships are hard.
We talked a little bit about everything today and he wouldn't own up to any of the sexting and flirting with girls from the past. When I told him it just seemed like he was looking for a way out considering, to me, it seemed like our relationship had been going so great lately and I didn't understand why he would break up so quickly, he denied wanting a way out and told me he was planning on asking me to move in with him soon but said he just didn't trust me regarding the fake FB accounts. He said he'd only consider getting together again if the girl was in hand cuffs. Which, to be honest, after talking to the police today there doesn't seem to be a whole lot I can do as there are no laws against catfishing and she didn't use my identity to gain anything. So there it is. I just have to let him go. *sigh* Relationships are hard.
@krysrenee7 Definitely. I've been saving everything from her. I already told her I talked to the police and she begged me to not get her parents involved. She even offered to Skype or call my Aquarius and confess everything to him but he said he won't believe any of it until he sees a girl in handcuffs over it.
Set up a meeting with you, him and her and have her admit to him everything she did.
If he's not willing to do that, then he's not worth the effort.
If he's not willing to do that, then he's not worth the effort.
Wow.
If he expects for the law in your state to change just to cater to his trust issues with you, then he'll be waiting for a lonnnnnnnnnnng time!
Maybe he does realize this already & is just blowing smoke up your azz b/c he's asking you to do something that he already knows is impossible. OR maybe he doesn't realize that this stalker situation is literally out of your hands & control & that it will all come down to him either taking the risk of trusting you or not.
If the only way for you to restore his trust is to wait on the law (the law that says she can't be arrested) to change, then you're right, there is no hope.
I'm still not buying though that he wasn't looking for a way out. I think he was. I think he does what many cheaters do after they've been caught. They can't wait to find something on you so that they can say HA! See I'm not the only bad person here! They hate being the only ones facing the ridicule! They hate being the only 1 in a room for liars! They always want others in there too b/c it makes them feel better & less guilty about their own shortcomings.
If you telling him that it's out of your hands legally doesn't work, then just give it a rest. The issue isn't her being in handcuffs. The issue is him not wanting to take the risk of trusting you again b/c of his own lack of courage to do so. He just doesn't want you to know that smh
If he expects for the law in your state to change just to cater to his trust issues with you, then he'll be waiting for a lonnnnnnnnnnng time!
Maybe he does realize this already & is just blowing smoke up your azz b/c he's asking you to do something that he already knows is impossible. OR maybe he doesn't realize that this stalker situation is literally out of your hands & control & that it will all come down to him either taking the risk of trusting you or not.
If the only way for you to restore his trust is to wait on the law (the law that says she can't be arrested) to change, then you're right, there is no hope.
I'm still not buying though that he wasn't looking for a way out. I think he was. I think he does what many cheaters do after they've been caught. They can't wait to find something on you so that they can say HA! See I'm not the only bad person here! They hate being the only ones facing the ridicule! They hate being the only 1 in a room for liars! They always want others in there too b/c it makes them feel better & less guilty about their own shortcomings.
If you telling him that it's out of your hands legally doesn't work, then just give it a rest. The issue isn't her being in handcuffs. The issue is him not wanting to take the risk of trusting you again b/c of his own lack of courage to do so. He just doesn't want you to know that smh
If you get him back, he's def. gonna cheat again
He went through all of that apologizing & swearing he'd never do it again when he 1st got caught, but amazingly now, he's not owning up to any of it, now that you're the one who's in hot seat?! Hmm...yep, that's the mark of a man who said sorry for something he wasn't really sorry for to begin with. He was sorry that he got caught, & not that he did it. People don't change what they refuse to acknowledge either to themselves or to others. Watch him girl
He went through all of that apologizing & swearing he'd never do it again when he 1st got caught, but amazingly now, he's not owning up to any of it, now that you're the one who's in hot seat?! Hmm...yep, that's the mark of a man who said sorry for something he wasn't really sorry for to begin with. He was sorry that he got caught, & not that he did it. People don't change what they refuse to acknowledge either to themselves or to others. Watch him girl
Posted by marchpisces7036
In another twist of oddness I received a message this morning from my stalker I even received a message on my blog admitting to everything, apologizing profusely, and begging me to not get the police involved. She said she was "going through a rough time" because her boyfriend dumped her earlier this year? So so weird.
@ceu He accidentally left his Facebook open one day on my computer and I saw the messages.
@mfwb55 I think you're not understanding what I said. I wasn't and am not gathering evidence against HIM. I'm gathering evidence against my stalker who has been using my photos and creating fake accounts to talk to my Aquarius and people I know. The only thing I'm trying to do with my Aquarius is talk to him about the situation in which he thinks I may have been responsible for, when I have solid evidence I'm not. And while I know he might not like to be pushed I don't think it's asking too much of the person I spent the past 8 months with in a serious relationship planning a future with to simply talk to me and discuss everything going on like adults.
my question to you is how did your stalker even know that you where researching her/ the fake sites? did you contact her to say " hey I know you have done this?" If you didn't, why the random message from her?
My thinking is your aqua was chatting her up and you finding these fake sites, freaked him out because he was going to get caught. He's covering his tracks. He's freaking out and cutting you off because he is hiding stuff and using this as an excuse IMO. Who else could have told her that you where considering the police, unless you told her of course.
Her and I went to the same college in Michigan and I still live in our college town. She moved after graduating, to LA supposedly and had told me she was living there this year. In her confession though she told me that was a lie, or at least that she hadn't been living there this year, yet she didn't state where exactly she was. She offered to meet in person to confess everything to me and my Aqua so I'm guessing she's living in my town still or visiting for the holidays.
She knew that I knew about the fake accounts because when my Aqua was talking to her on one of the accounts he started suspecting something was off and he realized it himself and blabbed his mouth to her that he knew the accounts were fake. She immediately deleted all of them but one when he said that. I found the email she had been using to catfish people with my identity by looking at the last remaining FB account she had and seeing the email that was listed on the profile. I was the one who told her recently, as of this week, that I would go to the police. As soon as I said that she changed her tune immediately from "this is the best for you" - in regards to me and my Aqua splitting to "omg, I'm so sorry, please don't get the police involved."
She sent me a very long email this afternoon (can't remember if I mentioned this earlier or not) confessing everything she's done over the past 2 years. She said she made SEVEN Fb accounts to be in contact with me under different names. When I asked her why she did everything she said she "was bored," it "was just for fun" and "didnt think it would get this far or anyone would get hurt.
The whole thing is truly crazy and I will be so glad when it's all over.
She knew that I knew about the fake accounts because when my Aqua was talking to her on one of the accounts he started suspecting something was off and he realized it himself and blabbed his mouth to her that he knew the accounts were fake. She immediately deleted all of them but one when he said that. I found the email she had been using to catfish people with my identity by looking at the last remaining FB account she had and seeing the email that was listed on the profile. I was the one who told her recently, as of this week, that I would go to the police. As soon as I said that she changed her tune immediately from "this is the best for you" - in regards to me and my Aqua splitting to "omg, I'm so sorry, please don't get the police involved."
She sent me a very long email this afternoon (can't remember if I mentioned this earlier or not) confessing everything she's done over the past 2 years. She said she made SEVEN Fb accounts to be in contact with me under different names. When I asked her why she did everything she said she "was bored," it "was just for fun" and "didnt think it would get this far or anyone would get hurt.
The whole thing is truly crazy and I will be so glad when it's all over.
Posted by marchpisces7036
Her and I went to the same college in Michigan and I still live in our college town. She moved after graduating, to LA supposedly and had told me she was living there this year. In her confession though she told me that was a lie, or at least that she hadn't been living there this year, yet she didn't state where exactly she was. She offered to meet in person to confess everything to me and my Aqua so I'm guessing she's living in my town still or visiting for the holidays.
She knew that I knew about the fake accounts because when my Aqua was talking to her on one of the accounts he started suspecting something was off and he realized it himself and blabbed his mouth to her that he knew the accounts were fake. She immediately deleted all of them but one when he said that. I found the email she had been using to catfish people with my identity by looking at the last remaining FB account she had and seeing the email that was listed on the profile. I was the one who told her recently, as of this week, that I would go to the police. As soon as I said that she changed her tune immediately from "this is the best for you" - in regards to me and my Aqua splitting to "omg, I'm so sorry, please don't get the police involved."
She sent me a very long email this afternoon (can't remember if I mentioned this earlier or not) confessing everything she's done over the past 2 years. She said she made SEVEN Fb accounts to be in contact with me under different names. When I asked her why she did everything she said she "was bored," it "was just for fun" and "didnt think it would get this far or anyone would get hurt.
The whole thing is truly crazy and I will be so glad when it's all over.
she really was "obsessed" with you. Perhaps she's one of those women who wants to be LIKE you, wants to have an exact life like yours. She desires to be in your place, not exactly but perhaps very similarly so. It's a Dr.Phil moment here.
^
want to add, in part of this:
consider it a compliment. Freaky but alot of filmstars/celebrities have this kind of thing happening to them all the time.
but it's also very scary and very intrusive. Celebrities don't like this happening to them either. So take some measures. Usually these people leave you alone, but if they don't, and it gets out of hand,
you know what to do.
want to add, in part of this:
consider it a compliment. Freaky but alot of filmstars/celebrities have this kind of thing happening to them all the time.
but it's also very scary and very intrusive. Celebrities don't like this happening to them either. So take some measures. Usually these people leave you alone, but if they don't, and it gets out of hand,
you know what to do.
I agree with Ceu (as always lol). Don't just give up b/c you got 1 opinion from 1 police officer. If nothing else, get a restraining order & include modifications in it that include her not only not being able to contact you or anyone affiliated with you but also her not being able to impersonate you. At the least, you can sue her for defamation of character.
Do some research online & see what your other options are. She may not qualify as a "stalker" in your state, but she might to other charges so don't give up b/c statistically, stalking tends to escalate & get worse over time
Don't meet up with her at all. Stop trying to make sense out of non-sense. Stalkers think irrationally. Meeting with her won't change that. The only thing that can kind of "tame" that whole situation is the police.
Do some research online & see what your other options are. She may not qualify as a "stalker" in your state, but she might to other charges so don't give up b/c statistically, stalking tends to escalate & get worse over time
Don't meet up with her at all. Stop trying to make sense out of non-sense. Stalkers think irrationally. Meeting with her won't change that. The only thing that can kind of "tame" that whole situation is the police.
I love Ceu!!!
And yes, you should also provide documentation (emails, text messages, emails, etc.) that detail any altercations or arguments b/w you & your boyfriend so that it helps you to prove your emotional distress or defamation of character case, if you were to go that route.
I think it's SO important that you not underestimate the severity of this stalking situation b/c you & this lady. If she's done this to you, she's probably done or is doing this to others & it's a good thing that she's afraid of the police b/c she'll never actually stop until the police get involved. Trust me, you don't want to wait until the stalking escalates (as it might the minute she finds out that you didn't really call the police OR that her doing that caused distress in your relationships).
Please go through with it & protect yourself b/c you just never know. Plenty of stalking victims who have been harmed or killed can attest to the fact that it's better to be safe than sorry & not even take the chance.
And yes, you should also provide documentation (emails, text messages, emails, etc.) that detail any altercations or arguments b/w you & your boyfriend so that it helps you to prove your emotional distress or defamation of character case, if you were to go that route.
I think it's SO important that you not underestimate the severity of this stalking situation b/c you & this lady. If she's done this to you, she's probably done or is doing this to others & it's a good thing that she's afraid of the police b/c she'll never actually stop until the police get involved. Trust me, you don't want to wait until the stalking escalates (as it might the minute she finds out that you didn't really call the police OR that her doing that caused distress in your relationships).
Please go through with it & protect yourself b/c you just never know. Plenty of stalking victims who have been harmed or killed can attest to the fact that it's better to be safe than sorry & not even take the chance.
The boyfriend is a loser and should have been dropped once his internet discretion's where made known.
I do not believe there is a stalker, just a frantic girlfriend gathering information by proxy.
Either way there is no hope for a lying cheating internet addicted boyfriend. He demonstrated there was no hope when lied and cheated.
I do not believe there is a stalker, just a frantic girlfriend gathering information by proxy.
Either way there is no hope for a lying cheating internet addicted boyfriend. He demonstrated there was no hope when lied and cheated.
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