sometimes ..all the time?
hey. im an aquarian male. believe it or not i keep in touch with a lot of my ex's. ive had many conversations regarding out past with each other etc... Ive also talked to the more recent women in my life, and it seems like they have all had the same 1st impression of me across the board. it seems as a lot of ladies see me as some sort of "conceited-player", type guy. either that or they felt that i was purposely being "stand-offish" for the 1st couple of months of meeting me. Some even said that they felt a little intimidated. even close friends of mine both male (although i dnt care about them) and female have said that it was kinda hard to get to know the "real" me.
I guess i just want to know why? i dont think im that un-approachable. it hasn't stifled my sex life, but i fear that it may pose a problem when i try to find a person i'd like to have a serious relationship with. im very busy with school and work etc.. and i have to say thats where my mind is at most of the day, but i dont know if thats making me a difficult person to know exactly (if that made any sense).
i like to look nice (kicks & stuff) and i do have a good amount of friends, but im far from a player... i like playing world of warcraft and talking about geo-politics (more of a cool nerd). what should i do to heat up this chilly persona im constantly givin' off. Can i? is it even in my "nature".
ohh yea I have both my sun and moon in aquarius if it means anything
andecant in Sagg
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Sep 30, 2007Comments: 92 · Posts: 5629 · Topics: 56
People tell me I give off an unapproachable vibe from time to time. That's either because I'm out of my element or I'm busy scanning the room and watching everyone else, talk to me after I've run for 20 minutes on a treadmill or finished crossing over every mofo on the court and it'll be like we've been best friends since grade school.
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Feb 26, 2008Comments: 0 · Posts: 8735 · Topics: 522
Well, are these people thinking these things because you are confident OR because they weren't confident enough to step to you in the moment? There's always 2 sides. Sure, alot of Aquas kind of have a "standoffish" or intimidating stance, but if only others knew, we aren't purposely wanting to wear a sign on our heads that says "Don't approach us."
Aquas have a different air about them & half of the time, our uniqueness & "oddball" mentality projects onto others before they even meet us or speak to us. And sometimes they mistake this unexplainable vibe from us as conceitedness and/or being too good for others. And hey, of course there are conceited Aquas out there too. For the most part, Aqua's main goal is not to be the cocky one that no one can't stand or won't approach. We don't see any gain from being that way. Sure we like to stand out, to be different AND to appear off-limits from the people who aren't on our level, but if only people would gain the confidence to step to us & THEN make their assessment of us, they'd be suprised at how opposite we really are from what they initially thought.
Alot of people say, "Wow, you're nothing like I thought you were!" And I respond by saying, "Seems like that's more YOUR problem then it is mine."
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Feb 26, 2008Comments: 0 · Posts: 8735 · Topics: 522
When I am walking somewhere, (especially in public) I always look straight ahead. Alot of people mistake this for me being conceited. No, I don't stare at the ground while I'm walking & NO, I don't look from side to side all the time to see whose staring/looking at me. I literally look straight ahead as if I'm the only person in my world. And hey, according to body langauge experts, this type of walking sends out the message of confidence to confident people & conceitedness to insecure people.
Now, if I started meeting people who were confident to step to me because of the confidence in themselves, & not neccesarily based on over-analyzing me to make that decision to step to me, & if these types of people were telling me I came off as arrogant, then maybe I'd take a look in the mirror & start wondering why more than 1 person keep saying the same things. But it's normally only the people who are insecure & non-confident that always have something to say about how unapproachable I am. The confident people never have this problem with me. And since other confident people are the ones I prefer to mingle with, only their opinions matter, if at all
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May 21, 2006Comments: 0 · Posts: 21685 · Topics: 138
"Alot of people say, "Wow, you're nothing like I thought you were!" "
Same here and even if it's not spoken you can definitely see there demeanor change.
I always say, "The weak need not apply."
There's not much else I can do about other peoples assumptions. *shrug*
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Feb 26, 2008Comments: 0 · Posts: 8735 · Topics: 522
Exactly. Nicely put Lady M