Do you hold grudges?
This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by IAmMystified on Monday, March 10, 2014 and has 26 replies.
My immediate supervisor who I mentioned previously is an aqua and he gets along with everyone in the workplace and is good at treating everyone in a civil and professional nature. He had a colleague that he worked with well that was also a supervisor but in another department.
Scorpio Male supervisor has been the type of guy who never really took his employment seriously and would always be found schmoozing with the women in the company and being late on deadlines and Aqua Male supervisor who is usually doing things by the book never told the Scorpio Male supervisor to start shaping up before he gets in trouble.
Eventually it caught up with him and Scorpio Male got in trouble for not turning in a report and Aqua Male Supervisor who was trying to help his colleague and did the report for him. But Scorpio Male flipped out because everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him, you could tell by how the report looked (it was more professionally done than what scorpio male usually turns in) and Scorpio accused Aqua Male of being a traitor, stabbing him in the back and not having his back etc.
This originally happened over a year ago and it went from Scorpio male always yelling and blaming Aqua Male, then it turned into them avoiding each other and Aqua Male going about his day and being "over it".
I'm not sure what changed but anytime Scorpio Male is in the department next to ours and Aqua Male can hear him talking to someone, Aqua Male quickly goes to that department to gossip about what was talked about. Every now and then Aqual Male makes some snarky comment about Scorpio male to me or to people in our department.
My supervisor has always gotten over things quickly that he was frustrated by (usually within minutes) and is never one to gossip but I find it ironic that any chance he gets he wants to know what Scorpio Male is up to, quick to make comments and gossip about him. He doesn't want Scorpio to lose his job but why does it matter now when it didn't matter the past 8 months?
Do aquas hold grudges or become bitter? Its weird behavior to see someone who normally doesn't get involved in situations acting like this.
Scorpio Male supervisor has been the type of guy who never really took his employment seriously and would always be found schmoozing with the women in the company and being late on deadlines and Aqua Male supervisor who is usually doing things by the book never told the Scorpio Male supervisor to start shaping up before he gets in trouble.
Eventually it caught up with him and Scorpio Male got in trouble for not turning in a report and Aqua Male Supervisor who was trying to help his colleague and did the report for him. But Scorpio Male flipped out because everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him, you could tell by how the report looked (it was more professionally done than what scorpio male usually turns in) and Scorpio accused Aqua Male of being a traitor, stabbing him in the back and not having his back etc.
This originally happened over a year ago and it went from Scorpio male always yelling and blaming Aqua Male, then it turned into them avoiding each other and Aqua Male going about his day and being "over it".
I'm not sure what changed but anytime Scorpio Male is in the department next to ours and Aqua Male can hear him talking to someone, Aqua Male quickly goes to that department to gossip about what was talked about. Every now and then Aqual Male makes some snarky comment about Scorpio male to me or to people in our department.
My supervisor has always gotten over things quickly that he was frustrated by (usually within minutes) and is never one to gossip but I find it ironic that any chance he gets he wants to know what Scorpio Male is up to, quick to make comments and gossip about him. He doesn't want Scorpio to lose his job but why does it matter now when it didn't matter the past 8 months?
Do aquas hold grudges or become bitter? Its weird behavior to see someone who normally doesn't get involved in situations acting like this.
He probably wants him to be fired or relocated if he's acting that way.
I would be too if I had to pick up some else's slack when they make the same $ $ as me. Why should I do more work than him and we both get paid equal?
Doesn't seem fair to me.
I would be too if I had to pick up some else's slack when they make the same $ $ as me. Why should I do more work than him and we both get paid equal?
Doesn't seem fair to me.
Even though I'm not immune to negative feelings and thoughts, I've never held a grudge for that long.
I think he's just putting on a "over it" facade to keep things under control.
I think he's just putting on a "over it" facade to keep things under control.
Posted by Bsmurray
He probably wants him to be fired or relocated if he's acting that way.
I would be too if I had to pick up some else's slack when they make the same $ $ as me. Why should I do more work than him and we both get paid equal?
Doesn't seem fair to me.
+1
Yeah they do make the same amount and have the same title for their respective departments but the first 8 months it didn't matter. They ignored each other and Aqua male went about his day happily.
Then these past 3-4 months everyday he's consumed and irritated by the Scorpio Male.
I have never seen him irritated by anyone that much, and that long. Its as if he was holding a grudge and wanted to punish the dude.
Its kinda scary LOL.
Then these past 3-4 months everyday he's consumed and irritated by the Scorpio Male.
I have never seen him irritated by anyone that much, and that long. Its as if he was holding a grudge and wanted to punish the dude.
Its kinda scary LOL.
Eh well that's just a couple of fixed signs that don't like eachother if ya ask me.
I'm confused bout this part?
"Aqua Male Supervisor who was trying to help his colleague and did the report for him. But Scorpio Male flipped out because everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him,"
then
" He doesn't want Scorpio to lose his job but why does it matter now when it didn't matter the past 8 months?"
sounds to me like sometime within the past months he TRYED to help Scorpio out by doing the report. If he did not care he would have not done so and I don't think he was trying to take credit either because as you said,
"everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him, you could tell by how the report looked (it was more professionally done than what Scorpio male usually turns in)"........ (so he never told anyone he did it,right?)Scorpio gets mad because he hears people talking about the truth and how slack he is
This is the part that is pretty immature in my opinion
"Scorpio accused Aqua Male of being a traitor, stabbing him in the back and not having his back etc"
I can tell you that Aquarius are very forgiving..
HOWEVER THIS PART IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAN
Aquarius people love to do things for others and help out in anyway that they can because that is what we live for to HELP. I had an extremely exhausting day at work today because I was doing work for 3 different departments to help out. We are sometimes work alcoholics But We love it as much as it kills us...Scorpio is probably to stubborn to see that Aquarius was only trying to help and not take over his role.
I think that Aquarius supervisor gossiping is only a reaction of hurt because he could not believe that Scorpio male accused him of being a back stabber when he was trying to help. It doesn't make him gossiping here and there right either
He is probably listening to everything Scorpio is saying because he feels Scorpio is being manipulative.
Did he get Scorpio's permission to do the report for him? If so, why would Scorpio say that Aquarius didn't have is back..
What am I missing here?..sorry for the long story..
One more thing...Sometime we Aquarius need to just mind our own business and leave people B...lol
"Aqua Male Supervisor who was trying to help his colleague and did the report for him. But Scorpio Male flipped out because everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him,"
then
" He doesn't want Scorpio to lose his job but why does it matter now when it didn't matter the past 8 months?"
sounds to me like sometime within the past months he TRYED to help Scorpio out by doing the report. If he did not care he would have not done so and I don't think he was trying to take credit either because as you said,
"everyone knew that Aqua Male did it for him, you could tell by how the report looked (it was more professionally done than what Scorpio male usually turns in)"........ (so he never told anyone he did it,right?)Scorpio gets mad because he hears people talking about the truth and how slack he is
This is the part that is pretty immature in my opinion
"Scorpio accused Aqua Male of being a traitor, stabbing him in the back and not having his back etc"
I can tell you that Aquarius are very forgiving..
HOWEVER THIS PART IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAN
Aquarius people love to do things for others and help out in anyway that they can because that is what we live for to HELP. I had an extremely exhausting day at work today because I was doing work for 3 different departments to help out. We are sometimes work alcoholics But We love it as much as it kills us...Scorpio is probably to stubborn to see that Aquarius was only trying to help and not take over his role.I think that Aquarius supervisor gossiping is only a reaction of hurt because he could not believe that Scorpio male accused him of being a back stabber when he was trying to help. It doesn't make him gossiping here and there right either
He is probably listening to everything Scorpio is saying because he feels Scorpio is being manipulative.
Did he get Scorpio's permission to do the report for him? If so, why would Scorpio say that Aquarius didn't have is back..
What am I missing here?..sorry for the long story..
One more thing...Sometime we Aquarius need to just mind our own business and leave people B...lol
@aquariuslove I just didn't put everything because it was a long story. Pretty much it boils down to this:
- Scorpio Male has this long history of not doing his job as a manager of his department. He's unprofessional, misses deadlines, basically has accomplished nothing. Why he still has a job? Because he has expertise in that specific department (field) that no one really else has even upper management so they "need" him otherwise they would have booted him long time ago.
- 1 1/2 years ago he had a report due that was supposed to go to a much needed client and he was late on it or forgot (i dont rememebr the exact reason) the client was a friend of the company head and word spread to upper management what happened. As a solution they wanted my supervisor (Aqua Male) to work closely with Scorpio Male to fix the problems.
- Aqua male was told by upper management that Scorpio Male didn't turn in a report and Aquarius male covered for him and did the report for Scorpio male. Then upper management asked both of them to come up with a solution to fix the problems and Aqua male took it seriously and Scorpio Male didn't and so when meeting came to talk about the solution, it was pretty obvious who came up with ideas. So that's kind of when Scorpio Male yelled at aqua male several times and scorpio's own employees accusing everyone of being a back stabber traitor and etc.
- After aqua male tried to talk to him a couple of times to resolve the argument, scorpio male was being stubborn and didn't want to talk to anyone. So aqua male decided to just let scorpio male pout and did his own thing and aqua male focused on his own department. So that's how it was for 8 months, each man doing his own thing.
- Then about 3-4 months ago I just started noticing Aqua male being really snarky about Scorpio Male. Whenever he heard something about Scorpio Male he'd wanna know what was going on, if he heard Scorpio male talking to someone, he'd listen to the conversation. He'd make comments about it. He was doing so well ignore Scorpio male for 8 months, not sure what changed.
Plus I ignore my supervisor because Scorpio Male has always been narcissitic and stubborn (its nothing new) and Aqua male never did anything about it before so why is he so bothered by his actions now. Everyone always asked Aqua Male ages ago before things became problematic "Why do you even talk to him" and he wouldn't ever have an answer.
Its almost like I wanna say "I told
- Scorpio Male has this long history of not doing his job as a manager of his department. He's unprofessional, misses deadlines, basically has accomplished nothing. Why he still has a job? Because he has expertise in that specific department (field) that no one really else has even upper management so they "need" him otherwise they would have booted him long time ago.
- 1 1/2 years ago he had a report due that was supposed to go to a much needed client and he was late on it or forgot (i dont rememebr the exact reason) the client was a friend of the company head and word spread to upper management what happened. As a solution they wanted my supervisor (Aqua Male) to work closely with Scorpio Male to fix the problems.
- Aqua male was told by upper management that Scorpio Male didn't turn in a report and Aquarius male covered for him and did the report for Scorpio male. Then upper management asked both of them to come up with a solution to fix the problems and Aqua male took it seriously and Scorpio Male didn't and so when meeting came to talk about the solution, it was pretty obvious who came up with ideas. So that's kind of when Scorpio Male yelled at aqua male several times and scorpio's own employees accusing everyone of being a back stabber traitor and etc.
- After aqua male tried to talk to him a couple of times to resolve the argument, scorpio male was being stubborn and didn't want to talk to anyone. So aqua male decided to just let scorpio male pout and did his own thing and aqua male focused on his own department. So that's how it was for 8 months, each man doing his own thing.
- Then about 3-4 months ago I just started noticing Aqua male being really snarky about Scorpio Male. Whenever he heard something about Scorpio Male he'd wanna know what was going on, if he heard Scorpio male talking to someone, he'd listen to the conversation. He'd make comments about it. He was doing so well ignore Scorpio male for 8 months, not sure what changed.
Plus I ignore my supervisor because Scorpio Male has always been narcissitic and stubborn (its nothing new) and Aqua male never did anything about it before so why is he so bothered by his actions now. Everyone always asked Aqua Male ages ago before things became problematic "Why do you even talk to him" and he wouldn't ever have an answer.
Its almost like I wanna say "I told
Scorp's probably failed the Aqua's probation. I give a time limit on how long I let someone slack for a multitude of reasons and if things don't improve I'll get snarky too out the lazy person that isn't capable of managing.
Its almost like I want to say "I told you so."
@aquanoz but Scorpio Male has been a slacker for 3-4 years. Aqua male knew this. He's always known this. I even asked Aqua male supervisor, why even bother. Everyone asked him the same think at some point and he always just went along with Scorpio Male's lazy, narcissitic behavior but did nothing about it. Not even a "hey man, you should start doing your job..."
He did nothing, now look at where everything is.
He did nothing, now look at where everything is.
Well I'm not speaking for all aquarius here but perhaps others will share this sentiment.
I don't judge based of hearsay, I don't gossip or any of that in the workplace or personal life. If a person is labelled a slacker, I want to understand why and see it for myself.
I don't judge based of hearsay, I don't gossip or any of that in the workplace or personal life. If a person is labelled a slacker, I want to understand why and see it for myself.
It's easy to turn around at any given situation to say I told you so and fair enough sometimes people are stubborn. But when it comes to people in particular it's more my own that I don't want to pass off judgment and yes perhaps some of us are too lenient.
Given the position he was given from the higher ups no matter my own feelings it's still out of my control. The benefit of the doubt approach and leniency and setting by example has always been my thing and perhaps it's his as well. There does exist a threshold but once that threshold is crossed we lose all faith in that person.
And if you're wondering yes perhaps that process can take years.
Given the position he was given from the higher ups no matter my own feelings it's still out of my control. The benefit of the doubt approach and leniency and setting by example has always been my thing and perhaps it's his as well. There does exist a threshold but once that threshold is crossed we lose all faith in that person.
And if you're wondering yes perhaps that process can take years.
"Scorpio Male supervisor has been the type of guy who never really took his employment seriously and would always be found schmoozing with the women in the company and being late on deadlines and Aqua Male supervisor who is usually doing things by the book never told the Scorpio Male supervisor to start shaping up before he gets in trouble. "
ohhh he's jealous? Scorpio man gets all the women coming by, stalking his magnetic sexy ass, and Aquarius man is fuming silently because he can't help but do his job and fears getting fired and secretly wishes he could attract all the women so he can get their milkshake.
J/k.
ohhh he's jealous? Scorpio man gets all the women coming by, stalking his magnetic sexy ass, and Aquarius man is fuming silently because he can't help but do his job and fears getting fired and secretly wishes he could attract all the women so he can get their milkshake.
J/k.
LOL lisabethur
It was nothing like that. Aqua male always laughed at Scorpio Male when Scorpio Male would hit on all the ladies. Because it wouldn't always work, sure the women giggled but they were never interested in Scorpio Male. He's a nice guy but he's not really the type of person you can take seriously becuase of his reputation of being a slacker and narcissitic. Hell I never really liked him, yet I still am kind enough to feel sorry for him that ever since he went off on alot of people that worked for him, he really doesn't have much freinds at work.
He feels alone probably. But eh he caused it.
@aquanos is right Aqua Male is the type of guy to just let things be until it directly affects him and at the time Scorpio Male's lazy work ethic never affected my supervisor until he had to start working with Scorpio Male. Because he doesn't pass judgement completely. He'll just make fun of you.
Makes sense now.
It was nothing like that. Aqua male always laughed at Scorpio Male when Scorpio Male would hit on all the ladies. Because it wouldn't always work, sure the women giggled but they were never interested in Scorpio Male. He's a nice guy but he's not really the type of person you can take seriously becuase of his reputation of being a slacker and narcissitic. Hell I never really liked him, yet I still am kind enough to feel sorry for him that ever since he went off on alot of people that worked for him, he really doesn't have much freinds at work.
He feels alone probably. But eh he caused it.
@aquanos is right Aqua Male is the type of guy to just let things be until it directly affects him and at the time Scorpio Male's lazy work ethic never affected my supervisor until he had to start working with Scorpio Male. Because he doesn't pass judgement completely. He'll just make fun of you.
Makes sense now.
Posted by aquasnoz
It's easy to turn around at any given situation to say I told you so and fair enough sometimes people are stubborn. But when it comes to people in particular it's more my own that I don't want to pass off judgment and yes perhaps some of us are too lenient.
Given the position he was given from the higher ups no matter my own feelings it's still out of my control. The benefit of the doubt approach and leniency and setting by example has always been my thing and perhaps it's his as well. There does exist a threshold but once that threshold is crossed we lose all faith in that person.
And if you're wondering yes perhaps that process can take years.
Aquasnoz....i 100% agree(The benefit of the doubt approach and leniency and setting by example has always been my thing and perhaps it's his as well. There does exist a threshold but once that threshold is crossed we lose all faith in that person.And if you're wondering yes perhaps that process can take years".. this is how i am also..
I am notorious for giving someone the benefit of the doubt....great example
Posted by IAmMystified
Its almost like I want to say "I told you so."
thanks...i understand much clearer now...an try not to rub it in Aquarius boss face to much
Posted by lisabethur8
"Scorpio Male supervisor has been the type of guy who never really took his employment seriously and would always be found schmoozing with the women in the company and being late on deadlines and Aqua Male supervisor who is usually doing things by the book never told the Scorpio Male supervisor to start shaping up before he gets in trouble. "
ohhh he's jealous? Scorpio man gets all the women coming by, stalking his magnetic sexy ass, and Aquarius man is fuming silently because he can't help but do his job and fears getting fired and secretly wishes he could attract all the women so he can get their milkshake.
J/k.
Maybe if Scorpio boss wasn't so busy trying to taste the milkshake he could get his real job done...lol...
Tighten up Scorp
I speak for myself when I say yes I do hold grudges....holy fuck do I hold grudges....but I'm not a gossip queen and I have a more direct approach when dealing with someone that pisses me off....and its always the case of them needing to be gone or I will go
@aquariuslove no worries. I said I told you the first time, but he's been whining and gossiping about it for 3-4 months. These days I just stay out of his conversation, and if he brings me into it, I usually just say "Just ignore him." but he never listens lol.
@aquariuslove re: Scorpio trying to get milkshake. Whatever he thinks his tactic is, it hasn't worked. He has friends and close family but no one really from the company. He's the type of guy that has interesting stories cause he's well read and watches the best news programs but when it comes to his stories, interesting as they are we doubt its even true. He's also the kind of guy to talk about things as if he knows what he's talking about when he really doesn't.
Plus if he doesn't think your hot, then he's not necessarily as nice/charming with you unless he needs your help. So as much as he was an asshole to me over time, I am at least still kind hearted enough to treat him with civility, I just won't seek him out for conversation.
Plus if he doesn't think your hot, then he's not necessarily as nice/charming with you unless he needs your help. So as much as he was an asshole to me over time, I am at least still kind hearted enough to treat him with civility, I just won't seek him out for conversation.
Posted by IAmMystified
@aquariuslove re: Scorpio trying to get milkshake. Whatever he thinks his tactic is, it hasn't worked. He has friends and close family but no one really from the company. He's the type of guy that has interesting stories cause he's well read and watches the best news programs but when it comes to his stories, interesting as they are we doubt its even true. He's also the kind of guy to talk about things as if he knows what he's talking about when he really doesn't.
Plus if he doesn't think your hot, then he's not necessarily as nice/charming with you unless he needs your help. So as much as he was an asshole to me over time, I am at least still kind hearted enough to treat him with civility, I just won't seek him out for conversation.
lol..poor scorp...Iv seen some of these traits in a scorp I knew..especially the story telling part...
I'm a scorp and I love telling stories too! I like shocking people or getting a reaction out of them.
Weird things usually happen to me so I have always got weird stories to tell.
Weird things usually happen to me so I have always got weird stories to tell.
No but I won't forget what's been done either. Ever. What will happen is that I'll give the person 2 more strikes. After the 3rd he/she is out. Fair enough, no?
I think its fair.
Everything is a choice in life. If you are choosing to hurt someone. Suffer the consequences!
Everything is a choice in life. If you are choosing to hurt someone. Suffer the consequences!
Posted by IAmMystified
Do aquas hold grudges or become bitter? Its weird behavior to see someone who normally doesn't get involved in situations acting like this.
Sure, Aquas can be very easy-going & forgiving when the person making the mistake isn't someone they went out of their way to help. But it's another story when the person you put your heart/job on the line for turns on you.
Remember, Aquas are still human lol
If a person I've never helped or invested myself in does something foolish, I'll leave all the office gossip up to all the others. Of course I'll notice, listen, & sit back & watch b/c I'm always "curious" but that's about it.
But when I get punished/crucified for trying to help your hard-headed azz, yeah the human comes out in me & I def. take it personal.
To me, choosing to no longer entertain someone & holding a grudge are 2 very different things. You'd have to seriously like slap my mother or do something insanely deal-breaking for me to hold an actual grudge. But if you've shown me your cards & those cards were ugly, I'll accept that. But that doesn't mean I'll ever talk to you again lol
I can be civil, but smiling all in your face just for the sake of proving a point that I'm not a grudge-holding person is just silly.
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