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Nov 03, 2013Comments: 6649 · Posts: 25219 · Topics: 78
Honesty hands down, even if it hurts. Hopefully I can learn from it to grow and improve. lol I have actually asked my friends what I do or say that might have offended them, I know my personality, I know I piss people off, what I don't know is what exactly it is I have done or not done, unless people are willing to tell me so I can work on that and hopefully correct it.
I find too many people are worried about hurting others so they don't speak up or they side step the real issues or blame it on a bad day, or bad mood. Not saying I haven't done the same to keep the peace, but sometimes it's enough to make you go WTF. That's when I typically say fuck it and make waves as I call it. I have lost friends over this, but that brings up another point, where they really friends if they cant handle what I have to say? I usually have those I call friend in my life because I respect what they have to say even if I don't agree with them. but if I don't get the same in return? Nawww, fuck that, they aren't friends.
I can feel or sense when others are being dishonest in what they are saying or when or if they are upset with me or perhaps others around, the lack of response sometimes is enough alone to confirm things. The walking on eggshells to not make waves or hurt folks feelings.. ignoring shit does not make it go away.
Tactfully honest is my thing. (Sometimes not so tactful, but hey , work in progress)
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Aug 18, 2017Comments: 1068 · Posts: 5048 · Topics: 2
Honesty ofcourse.
Being diplomatic carries a certain amount of fakeness with it. No bueno.
There are ofcourse exceptions when being diplomatic nets you capital of this and that kind but overall this is my rule of thumb.
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Jun 12, 2017Comments: 1971 · Posts: 4663 · Topics: 69
Too often people mistake brown nosing for diplomacy. If someone insults you and you ignore it for your OWN benefit or they do bad things and you ignore it for YOUR OWN benefit that is brown nosing and it's cowardly.
If you are being careful with words to build relations on behalf of a good cause or your country or another party. THAT is diplomacy.
My cousin is an advocate for terminally ill patients and constantly takes lip ...but she takes it for a higher purpose. That is being diplomatic.
I know another person who will literally let anyone he perceives to have influence to say shit about him...and sucks up to scum. But if you are a nice person with nothing to offer but that he will treat them like dirt. He will never be nice for no reason. THAT is a brown noser.
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Apr 23, 2016Comments: 512 · Posts: 2341 · Topics: 198
I would say honesty but in a diplomatic way. You can tell harsh truths without being so blunt and hurtful
You reek fella = bad
I dont want to say it in front of everybody but please buy a deodorant.
like trump. however sometimes bluntness is good to wake somebody up. I heard of a doctor who said to his patient: You either follow my prescriptions or you will be a dead fucker in two years and your children will grow up without their father. Unfortunately many people perceive diplomacy as weakness.
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Oct 08, 2009Comments: 1 · Posts: 6313 · Topics: 313
I’ve always been taught by my mum not to lie but having a Gemini for a mother I understand that the truth is elastic because we all have our truths and that knowledge is power and having the wisdom to know when and when to hold back that power can alter your reality for good or for bad.
The trait I look for in everyone is transparency, it’s a true test of humanity is being completely open and vulnerable is what I look for in awesome people not so much the truth.
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Oct 25, 2017Comments: 0 · Posts: 104 · Topics: 11
My Aqua broke up with me 2 weeks ago for 2nd time and once again over text and without giving an explanation. I tried to get her to explain it to me but she kept saying that wrong words are coming out, kept changing subject to other things (ie. saying good qualities of me, talking about her past relationships with nice guys, definition of being cruel, etc). I wanted her to be honest and direct but she couldnt. I did tell her that she cant even face me to say what's going on and she said she can see me if I wanted. I sent her a text taking her up on her offer but she never responded after that. Next day I had an accident and my phone died and right now with a loaner phone I don't even have her phone number anymore.
I plan on calling her after I get her number again and asking for us to meet face to face.
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May 04, 2012Comments: 4373 · Posts: 50653 · Topics: 564
i am married to a man who doesn't shy from conflict.
if i ask him a question he will tell me straight.
no getting angry over confrontation.
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Mar 27, 2017Comments: 1330 · Posts: 12920 · Topics: 29
Screw diplomacy. That ain't our thing.
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Jan 10, 2015Comments: 1877 · Posts: 16918 · Topics: 108
Honesty is only acceptable when it's me telling other people lol!