how do you get an aquarian back

My aquarian has lived long distance for the past 6 months. I was going to move in with him in another couple of months, but he recently decided that he wanted to end it. I know he has feelings, but whenever he thinks I care too much, his feelings just go away. He was being distant and broke up with me once in the beginning of December, but he came back by Christmas. I am afraid this time its for real, though. We havent talked in 2 and a half weeks. Our last conversation I was a bit irrational (emotional) and he hung up. I sent him a little note explaining that I got so upset because I needed to do that in order to be able to let go. I also apologized for yelling and asked him to please not call me. He hasn't. I am now ready to call him and talk rationally. The thing is, is that I want to know what to say in order to make things work. I am thinking that I should just tell him that I accept that we can't be together and that everything happens for a reason. I dont want him to think that I hate him. He is the type that will not go out of his way for anything, and if he thinks I would reject him, he would not admit it regardless of how much he missed me. The first time he came back he went for over a week trying to play it cool and not calling even though it was killing him inside, and eventually broke down and told me he was having a hard time and wanted to talk. Thats only because he knew I missed him too and would probably want to get back together as well. I was wondering if there was any advice for me.

Dear Scorp 28,

I too have a friend (male) who is an Aquarian. These species are very different, odd (in a very wonderful way). No sense in trying to understand them...just let it all fall into place. The best advice that I can give you is for YOU to follow YOUR heart and say what FEELS good for you to say. Reason is: so that you will not look back someday and have regrets...wishing you would have expressed your feelings. Just be you and if it is meant to be, it will be. If you love someone, you will have no problem letting them go. Can't stop real love...no way. It will catch up to you sooner or later.

My friend and I have gone back and forth as well....we always end up back because we miss each other...sometimes I think this is part of the "dance" we particpate in with relationships. It is how we discover each other.


My best to you and to your aqua man....

Freebird

Aqua Alert!!!!!!!

My aqua friend is acting distant again. I don't understand how he talks of friendship and being open and then when he feels like it, he disappears. No contact. The only thing that I can think of is the fight between mind and heart. Oh well, there is always tomorrow 🙂

He must have stuff to work out....I will move on to the next adventure....Brashing onward!

"free" bird

Honesty is always best.

Star,

You are so "right on"....honesty is ALWAYS the best! However, we first must be honest with ourselves and our feelings. Just walkin around learnin...just learnin...about life.

Happy Trails....

Who would want an aquarian back you are messing with the dark side.

Ohhhhhhhh James, you intrique me. The "dark" side. What is this all about?

darth vader...

I was born 15 jan the closer you get to the 20th of jan the the closer you get to evil. I thought everyone knew this. I am born so close that at times I find myself drifting toward the dark side. I must fight it all the time. One can not give in to it.

Dear James or Darth Wanna be......

I need for you to explain to me your perception of "evil"...and why is Jan. 20th considered the "evil" date? I have never heard of this before...

So, I will assume (gosh I really don't like assuming...you know what THAT does...) that if there is an EVIL date there must be a HEAVEN date—? Could you let me know what day that might be? OHHHHHHH...maybe these two forces can come together and create some excitement. 🙂

Another question for you....how do you fight it?

Tag, you're it!

OOOOOOOOh freebird It is always best to give the perception of evil talk when one has had a drink or two. By the by when I assume its always I make an (ass uf me). Back to the evil in the dark side 20 Jan the first day of the birth of the aquarian people. The closer your date of birth to this date the more likley you are to be evil. There is no heaven only hell. The aquarians all my life they have been tring to get me they will do anything to win you over buy you drinks, offer sex, I will not go beyond this its to spooky. I must go shower off now its got to me.

Okay-Frrrreak boy! Sounds like you have some rather serious issues....ever considered showering with Holy water, perhaps some shock therapy treatments or counseling? Or are you more inclined to take a cattle prod with 666 to your forehead? Whichever, your comments are always very enteresting...Homicidal? Suicidal? Or just a good ole' plain everyday frrreak boy?

Oh my goodness......

Frrrreak Boy. I would guess you are the one with issues txchic. But I doubt they are serious. Seems one must vent ones anger at times,grounded by the parents perhaps? Holy water priest make a move on the boyfriend and not you? I do try to be enteresting. Homicidal , suicidal just isn't me. Before you stomp the feets out of your jimmy jams try to get a grip on reality. remember I had CWAB deported.

P.S. Freebird I would apologize for the rude interuption. You would think on a messageboard with the gentility or shall I say the decorum of our prestigious correspondents it would preclude this type of rude, insensitive, behaviour. My apology. One must always remember James Tate is the only neanderthal on this messageboard.

Oh James...apology accepted. I will always remember that you are the ONLY neanderthal on this here message board.

Thanks for keeping us all on track. The boards need to be swept every once in awhile 🙂

Hope all is well....

Free~bird

My dear freebird I may have almost missed it. Perhaps txchic is an aquarian perhaps it (male or female I am not sure) comes from the dark side. WHOOOOOOOOOOOO What do we have here? perhaps there are some who would like to guess what is txchic? I am going with an evil aquarian who lives under a Toad stool. Of course this is open for debate.

LOL! This is funny=)

James, I'm even closer than you are... and I know EXACTLY what you mean, he he...

If you are closer than I beware the great camel of life may leave a sawlog in your doorway.

JT only a camel in a zoo can leave that type of log. No breaks outs here, that we have heard about. : ] but carefull of the Eagle. : ]

I agree c-b but I would place a wager that txchic could leave one that large. By the By mr hand de cap the name sounds french but I would guess a play on words.

Scorpio pal,

so you want your aquarian lover back...I am gonna tell you how to win back every aquarian under the universe......I am female aquarius and I've been round the block (more times than I care to remember). I've had relationships with every sign under the sun or zodaic:c-) and I know for sure...(and I am not nit-opicking here that scorpions are naturally jealous and cling-ons! somewhat). You want to make your aquarian come back!...you simply tell him you are leaving...tell him you have to move on and cannot see him or her again in your life. Aquarians (me for sure too!) cannot stand being rejected of whatever nature (even if the person was the most ugly person on the universe (I hate the word ugly but am just using it here to emphasize what needs to be emhasized!) and was teling me they had come to a decision not to see me again) - I would fight tooth and nail to get them to ring, text, email, write, meet up again....I would spare nothing to get them back in my world again (ok once they are back, then I do the rejecting!! - sorry to be so honest and so close to the bone here ) but that's how most aquaians operate.....so just tell your aquaian mate you have come to the end of the line...and see him panickly get you back in his life....works all the time:-) 100% guaranteed>
Ciao Alana:-)

Really? Don't you get tired of the games? Do Aquas come back to the relationship because they do not like being rejected or for true love? Is there a difference for Aquarians? I have a very good Aquarian male friend but I must say, he sure can drive me crazy sometimes. He is sooooooooo busy and then tells me that I don't have time for him. Oh well. He also does not like to initiate things. Friends...that is all I can be to him.

Thanks Alana for your openess...

Scorp28~ straight up~ your question isn't very clear..but if you're asking for a relationship again with your aqua..I would say to keep a frequent check on your emotions..aquas don't do emotions.. you can be cool and calm for best.. drop in to touch base with him when you need to..but keep it light, razorsharp,crisp and then friendly..

~race him for his money mentally.. see him agile, full throttle in matrix style lights and speed..then kick in twist of deep evil flirtation ..then bring him back up for air_drive him like a rude sports car `swift..360 spin__ and sudden stop>. shift gears and look over...
he's powerless to resist that shift.. constantly freshly freakishly thrilled..always hooked..dark glasses now..full leather gear~~ darkangel. goodluck~~

mental speed..that is

..totter.. whups! D'near slipped.. Jaya, that works on Any Male.

🙂

good luck.

Alana~

I have a question for you. I am curious as why one would want to tell an Aquarian that you no longer want to see them and then they (aqua) tries to get that person back only to get rid of him/her again? I am confused.

My male Aqua guy has been acting very strange recently. I don't pay much attention to his behavior because I know it has something to do with him and his thoughts. His words do not match his actions. He says we are great friends and then he ignores me. I have NO clue where this has come from...does an Aquarian just stop communicating with a friend like this or have I landed on a new planet? When we last spoke about 4 days ago...all was fine (at least I thought it was) Sheeesh, help me to understand if you can...he must be trying to "twist" me up.

Thanks Alana 😉

Sweet~P...gotta agree with you on this one...I cannot figure them out. One minute they are so nice and the next...they don't know who we are. Go figure. I give up.

I am speaking ONLY of my experiences of the MALE species. I have no opinion of the female species.

HELP!!!!!!! Will my friend ever talk with me again? 😢

hmm.

Where is that post on the Bad Traits of guys signs that Phoenix posted?

Sweet~P you sure have enlightened me on something that I was not aware of. Do they really enjoy torturing other people? I THOUGHT my aquarian guy was honest and real. We have always had such fun together. I was talking and laughing with him one day and the next day he quit talking with me...avoided me when he saw me (which he has never done before). Quit calling, I emailed a short note and he did not respond...he was on IM and didn't say hi. Is this the type of torture you may be talking about? Why does one choose to treat another human being this way? Is this the type of "friend" that I want in my life? Is this a control thing? I can perfectly understand if someone can no longer be friends with me but they should have the decency to tell me instead of playing these games. I may take your advice and write a letter as well.

Thanks Sweet~P, I'll check out the other post.

Sweet~P I hope you don't mind if I send you an email?

You sure did and I Thank you very much 🙂

hey scorp28 where r u? let us know how it went..

Ah forget it...I don't want him back in my life...

"Circumstances don't make a man, they reveal him."

Saw a different side that does not work for me.

The End 🙂

"Alana~

I have a question for you. I am curious as why one would want to tell an Aquarian that you no longer want to see them and then they (aqua) tries to get that person back only to get rid of him/her again? I am confused."

Dear freebird, sorry only getting to answer your question now as I was away on my hols for a week or so.

Aquarians just don't like it when people decide to walk out of their life. I suppose the bottom vanity-line! so to speak is - how come someone just doesn't want me in their lives or world anymore?? That's what I would ask myself - I know it sounds vain but that's the way I feel. I can't believe that their world is not a better, more magical place when I am in it in some shape or form!!! So I seduce them back into my world or life and most times, I am happy to have them back and they are glad too and all is well, but if they have hurt me deeply, I seduce them back, they think all is well and then (here I hang my head now in shame!) I will suddently dump or get rid of them quite cruelly.

But as for your aqua guy not paying attention to you all the time - I wouldn't worry - sometimes I am glued in 110% to another and sometimes - I am off in my own little world, thinking thoughts, making plans and I am sure my partner thinks I have left the planet.....but it's just our way....so many thoughts to be thinking, so many plans, so much of so much:-) Hope you can understand my ramblings.
A x

Thanks Alana for responding to my post. Whew, you described him exactly. Somehow, unbeknownst to me, I must have hurt him or he "thought" that I hurt him (his perception) He doesn't ask for clarification if there is something he doesn't understand, he forms his own thoughts and that is that. He did bring me back into his world only to "cruelly" drop me. He quit calling and ignored me when he saw me. I did approach him and asked him if we could talk about this....he left. A couple of days later, I saw him again. He approached me and I let him do all the talking. The next day, I saw him again...he approached me, I was nice and said hi and proceeded to do what I needed to do. He followed me around and I payed no attention to him. At one point I walked right past him and completely ignored him...didn't know he was there. I suppose that was the kicker for him because he then left.

I am not one to play games and I know he is into the "mental, emotional cruelty" thingy. I see right through him by his actions. This is not REAL to me and us Aries admire realness, honesty, trust to name a few. I have lost respect for him. I also feel that he does not respect himself enough to be respectful to others.

Alana, I am only referring to HIM not to the Aquarius' in general. I hope you know this.

So, his he going to make another move?

Thank you so much for ALL of your insight, it has really helped me more than you know.

Freebird

I also hope that you had a great time being away...you were missed!

Hi Freebird once again my pal - hope you keep well today. I've read the comings and goings of Mr. Aquarius and your reactions to him. You are playing it cool and that is good, real good, and if you are really want him back, you are going about it the right way coz aquarians hate to be pressured back into anything - and remember this...."Forbid me something and its that which I desire" as one famous philosopher said!!! You are the forbidden fruit now:-) and this is very challenging to an aquarian guy.

Being Aries I know you are into truth, honesty etc. and don't like playing games as you have said.....and that is very noble and a great trait of Ariens. But I am saying to you now:-)....you want to seduce or catch an aquarian....you've got to play the game..and play it well....aquarians love mind games....they are masters at it....it's a big turn-on for them in the game of love:-) You are mentally and intellectually stimulating your lover's mind and this itself is an aphordisiac to an aquarian!!! I know others signs don't like it and find it tiresome and irksome but to us aquarians we just love it....well I do anyway.....and I like to be one step ahead all the time and usually am:-) So that's my advice for what it's worth today to you my pal.

As for me enjoying my holidays...well....not really Freebird....me and Mr. Virgo finished. Oh...sigh from the heart....😢 So in the space of a month, I have lost my two guys Mr. Cap and Mr. Virgo - perhaps I got what I deserved all along for the way I double-dated them but....it hurts, it hurts hard.

Having said that, I met a guy last Saturday...a real sweety....he's way younger than me....but that's not a problem....but he just ain't no Mr. Virgo....and when I look into his eyes, I still see Mr. Virgo, dream of him all the time.....Mr. V. managed to work himself into my heart and soul like no-one else ever did in my life - he is the teardrop that will live in my heart forever.

Ciao my pal.
Alana x

Hi Alana 🙂 Thanks for responding and yes, I am doing very well thank you. I hope you are too. I am so sorry to hear about your Virgo man. I KNOW how you are feeling my dear and I feel your hurt. As you know, time is the cure and focusing on yourself and your needs.

I continue to be cool to my friend. Actually, I wonder if he really was my friend at all. His favorite saying was, "trust me". I would respond with..."you know what they say when a guy says, trust me don't you? it means do NOT trust him." I believe that proved to be true.

Anywho...we haven't seen each other and that is fine with me. What will be will be. Alana, I really am not meant to play mind games with people. I need security, to feel safe and trusting with someone that I can count on and that person can count on me too. Without the honesty and trust there is no basis for a truthful relationship with anyone. There is no happiness found in the mind, it is in the heart. These are just my thoughts and what I need. Mr. Aquarius and I are on different paths. We met, we learned, we experienced and now it is time for recess!

I so appreciate your kindness in explaining to me about you all. It is very helpful and gave me a better understanding. I also feel that a lot of what happened was not all due to his sign but also his background.

Take care of your special heart, Alana

Freebird

Only logging in now this week Freebird and thanks for your last posting to me - I am glad to hear that you are "so getting on" with your life after "Trust Me - Mr. Aquarius"!! YOu say you wonder if he ever truly was your friend. I feel that he was and still is......once your a friend of an aquarian...you will be for life....even if we/he go will opt out of yours from time to time......

Anyway, Freebird, on a lighter note....I got back with my Mr. Virgo last nite.....it was two weeks since the break-up.....I wanted him back badly and I guess I used my womanly wiles on him over that period and last nite to snare him!! He hurt me alot and I know I hurt him too but we have started afresh:-) and that is the best we can do for now. In between the "time off" or "cooling down period", I had a very nice liaison with a young Mr. Taurus - I was wined and dined and made feel wanted:-) - he was a perfect gentleman (well until he got to the bedroom:-)!!) but that is over for now and it's virgo time again:-)
Ciao for now.
Alana x

Whew....you sure get around girlfriend. Talents, you must have many talents. 😉 Are the male Aquas as "explorative" as the females? I admire your openess and freedom to be who you are. Mr. Taurus didn't do it for you? What is it about Mr. Virgo that brings you back to him?

Ya know, I do not feel that when people take time apart that it is always a bad thing. It gives us time to reflect on ourselves and what is going on. To see a clearer picture. And, when two people do get back after this time it usually will raise the intimacy level between them both.

Guess what I did last night? My Aquarian "friend" was on IM (actually for the past two and a half weeks we both have been on but neither of us will make the first move.) Enough! I thought...this is silly, he is my friend and I care very much for him. Life is tooooooo short to not communicate with those we care about. He did respond and it was very nice to chat with him. He said he is doing well and I was glad to hear that. I kinda felt that if he did not want to communicate with me he would not have been on IM....I think he was just a little nervous that I may not respond. Oh, the power of a woman. 😉

Good to see you back on the boards Alana.

Hi Freebird, hey Missy...so glad to hear that you took that brave step and got in touch with Mr. Aq.!! Well done, as you say, life is too bloody short for all the huffing and puffing that we do, espec. between the ones that we really like....so Carpe Diam....(Seize the day in Latin! I am showing off here!) and well done!! - and I am sure he was delighted to hear from you - who wouldn't want a Freebird in their lives— And if they don't, then there is something wrong with them! a lacking! let's call it:-)

Yes, Mr. Taurus was a real sweety...very touchy, feely, complimentary....but I was married to a Taurus before...and even though they are beautiful people I find them a little boring and too "grounded" and practical for me. So when Mr. Virgo eventually rang and asked could we meet for a chat as friends!!, I knew in my heart and soul, that Mr. V. can never be just friends with me, it's his way of saying he wanted to get back.....I huffed and puffed for a few days telling him I'd have to think about the friend thing - maybe it was best we didn't see each other!!! (maybe like hell!!)....this drove him wild so eventually I relented......got dressed up to the nines, nice make-up,hair done, and went down to his house.....I had a bottle of water in my hand (to be honest I was neervous and my mouth was dry!) and when he seen me, I asked him if he wanted some....he replied he wanted a kiss from me first.....I gave him a nice kiss.....and we took it from there.....there was a lot of talking and analysing in between and for once, I was able make him stop talking and listen to me......he's still the jealousest guy!! I have ever encountered....but underneath he has a good heart:-)

Bye for now F.
A x

Alana~

So glad that your time with Mr. Virgo turned out so well. I am truly happy for you.🙂 Ya done good!

Well, Mr. Aquarius...IM me last night saying he needed to come over and talk with me. I said, it is too late, call me. He said I need to talk to you, to see your face. I said, okay let's plan something for tomorrow. He said, I need to see you tonight to tell you what I have been feeling. I said fine, come over.

It was not a good time for me at all. I realized that he is really messed up big time. I felt like I was under some microscope being grilled about everything. He was looking for something to blame me for something to say that I lied to him (which I never had). So, he comes up with this...."the reason that I left you was because you lied to me" I said, "about what?" he says, "you are taking blood pressure medicine and you didn't tell me. I thought we had an open and honest relationship here." Now mind you...my head is going in circles wondering what this has to do with the price of tea in china! I told him that I did not lie to him and infact, I am not taking BP bills anymore. A very weird night with so much to tell. Bottom line, he came over (he too had a bottle of water in his hand) We never kissed, he never made any advances on me. I suppose he could feel my distance from him. I was protecting my heart. I did not need a reason, it was my feeling to. Back to the bottom line...he wanted sex. I said, "no". You leave, you don't call, and you expect me to have sex with you? There are other woman out there for this purpose alone, I am not one of them. So, I think he now has his answer and I pray that I do not hear from him again. He said being with me was like being on a rollercoaster ride (as he is sitting in his car). I grabbed his seat belt and said, "here, you may need to buckle up because being with me is going to be a wild ride and only the strong will survive"

Emotionally, I am drained, this is not a good sign or a good feeling. I'm outta this one.

I am so glad that your experience was better than mine but I needed to go through this to see who he really is. I'll pass. His loss.

Next!😉

Chat soon Ax
FREEbird

F....hell Freebird....what a night....what a man....!!! Of course you are emotionally and physically drained today but I assure you that will pass.....Even I, am a bit baffled at his behaviour...but then again perhaps deep down I am not so......"the blood-pressure bit excuse"....I know deep down that I will come up with the lamest excuse or even lie now and again to get a reaction from the guy I am crazy about...it might be the most "out there" crazy idea but sometimes to get the reaction I want, I will use whatever crazy idea comes to mind. For example, once I accused mr. Virgo of having different girlfriends when I found a box of condoms in his press one night. Even though I knew and remembered we had used them ages ago, I accused him of having different girlfriends and said I couldn't see him any longer as I didn't come second to anybody!!!.....what a plonker I was that night - I just wanted to get a passionate reaction but was not prepared to share my true feelings and put myself on the line emotionally!!!...I know now how stupid it was ....but to get back to your mr. Aquarius.....I think this man deep down cares alot for you, big time...the fact that he wanted to come over straight away...had to!!!...that's so typical aquarian when they are in need!.....(they will never admit to needing you! but....) but the standard quip is - "I have to see you right now...no! not tomorrow or the day after...like now"...yes or no! up to you!" The fact that he ever made any advances or tried to kiss you...so bloody aquarian also......my body does be longing to kiss, hold, touch, reach out to Mr. V. after we have had a fight etc.(and even it's my fault), there is no way in this world tbat I will make the first move. I'd rather nearly die than have to make the first move on the other person....i'ts not a good characteristic, wish I could be different but I just can't. The other person just has to make the first move on me....it's all about rejection, fear of intimacy, etc. for the aquarian. Yes, I know that he wanted sex, and you were probably right in not giving in (for last nite) anyway...but I feel if you had of given in, then and only then will Mr. Aquarian open up to you. Aquarians after they make love (well, it's like they are differnet new people, only after the act, does their heart truly open, for a time being anyway!!, and they will tell you their deepest, hidden feelings, no matter what you ask them, they will tell you, it all comes tumbling and spilling out bit by bit, - only then will they reveal their true core being to you......so of course I am on your side my friend......but deep down I understand how Mr. Aquarius felt too......
But hey, I truly liked your seatbelt quip....that's gonna get him thinking and thinking and thinking....and the fact that he didn't succeed in having sex with you....well now my friend, you are a challenge to him once again, aquarians always want what they can't have......

I know you feel p...sed off with him.......and you say he's out of the frame.....but is he really....why did you let him come over last nite even though you didn't really want it.....I laughed when you said he had the bottle of water in hand like me....must be an aquarian thingy:-)

You are so angry and drained now...my advice, don't think too much, don't feel too much....just drift the next few days....if he makes a move and gets in contact....then you know you have him....aquarians will always apologize after a few days if they know they have done wrong......

In the meantime......consider yourself hugged my pal.

A x

Hi! Freebird,

I am just an observer and maybe sometimes able to see things from a different perspective is helful.

You are normally very open and easy going and just a all around GREAT person. Lately, you seem coiled up and ready to strike like a rattler at Mr. Aqua. He has gotten to you and you are in defensive mode. Lighten up a little if you can friend.
Mr. Aqua needs a break from you. Give him one and maybe a couple of hugs. He is trying, it appears to me. Maybe he clashing with you and both of you timing is off. I think this could work if you step inside shoes and because you are the woman you are smarter at relationships and can understand the dance better. Try and understand him
freebird.

Thanks again Alana for your awesome insight on your sign ~very, very helpful information. And....thank YOU for the hug. 🙂 It gave me warm fuzzies....

I have moved on with my life and am enjoying myself and dating. A Cap/Aqua guy is taking me out to a movie and dinner. Why do I keep finding myself in situations with the "dark side" as JT would say? Another Aqua has come my way hmmmmm. "Try to understand him." as Alfie quoted.....maybe this is my mission: Learning to UNDERSTAND the Aqua...the greatest challenge of all. Actually, it is only a great challenge if I think it is.

Out of the frame? Yes, I do think he is. But, one really never knows. I do find that when we separate ourselves we are able to observe our situation from another perspective. Time will tell won't it?

Alfie~ I appreciate your view as well. I really had not looked at in that way. I'm not sure how you mean that I have been "coiled up and ready to strike". We both have been in defensive mode. We both have been pushing each others buttons and you know what happens when you push ALL the buttons in the elevator....it stalls out, it goes nowhere, it is at a standstill and needs to be reset in order to begin again. (I was once stuck in an elevator, it completely shut down...yes, I thought it was very exciting and cool) Mr. Aqua has his break he has mentioned before that he thought our timing was off and yes, I agree with him. For now, I am floating...he may contact me, he may not. Either way I know it is for the best and I am very grateful for having experienced everything that I have with him. Not sure I am able to give him any hugs....I don't see him.

Thank you also for your perspective of my situation. It is always good to see it from another's eyes. 😉

With MUCH appreciation,
Freebird

Alana~

Well, you were correct. The Aquarian has made contact by phone. It is as if nothing has ever happened. I am fine with letting by~gones be by~gones...forgive and forget. However, I will be coming from a different place concerning the decisions that I make with him. Alfie, I will also slip my feet into his shoes before I say anything. I will take nothing personally, I will travel on my path enjoying each moment that is presented to me. He did thank me for some of the moments that we shared and he realized that moments cannot be repeated so it is important to enjoy each one. I suppose we both are learning a lot.