I love you Aqua man, but you broke my virgo heart

This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by aquavirgo on Tuesday, September 3, 2013 and has 21 replies.
I have been in love with my aquaman for about 3 1/2 years now. I can??t even tell you how he knows me. Until now he won??t tell me anything other than he got my number from a mutual friend. It all started from a text and I thought it was a joke from a friend that changed her number perhaps. For months, he was trying to chat with me. He was chasing me again and again, always looking for me, always trying to chat with me. In the beginning, I didn??t always answer his chat messages, texts or emails right away or even at all sometimes. I just wasn??t that interested. But he persevered obviously and I brought up the idea of meeting. It was the first time I ever met someone like this. I arrived at the restaurant before him and needed a double gin and tonic to calm my nerves. I had no idea who I was meeting although we had photos of each other. When he sat down to talk he had an instant calming effect on me. I am a very nervous, anxious person normally and feeling a sense of calm around him was a relief. There was a moment when I told him to take his glasses off and when our eyes connected I felt this deep connection with him. Something I never felt before with anyone. I??ll never forget how practically feeling this love at first sight feeling was so strong from my side. Still, my aquaman said he loved me already a couple weeks before we met for the first time.
Over the next weeks I would accept several of his offers to meet again, but would cancel the day we were supposed to meet. I was still afraid of falling in love although it was what I really wanted. He still persevered and one day I just stopped running from him and decided to give him a try. He was so happy. I adored the constant attention he gave me, chatting from morning to night, everyday, always wanting to know how I am and where I am. We always have such a great time together, I am at peace when I am with my aquaman and feel like he is my home. Although I feel this man is my soulmate and he said he feels I am his soulmate too, still, there were many hiccups.
I quickly learned what he didn??t like because he would react in anger and shut down and give me the silent treatment for days or weeks. He hated me talking to any ex so those contacts were quickly disposed of in the first months of our relationship. he hated me posting certain things on FB so I deleted my FB account. I even changed my email account to give my aquaman the security of knowing none of my ex??s could reach me. I have
weird.... how come only part of my message posted????
(since the entire message I typed didn't post, I'll post it in pieces....)
I quickly learned what he didn??t like because he would react in anger and shut down and give me the silent treatment for days or weeks. He hated me talking to any ex so those contacts were quickly disposed of in the first months of our relationship. he hated me posting certain things on FB so I deleted my FB account. I even changed my email account to give my aquaman the security of knowing none of my ex??s could reach me.
I have made my life all about him, and I was happy to cater to his demands for the greater good of our relationship and our happiness.
It gets a little messy here and please i hope you will refrain from judging.
When we met, we were both involved with other people and each of us living with these other people. Let me be blunt??_. we were stuck in unhappy marriages. When we met I was married for 13 years and aqua man started chasing me a few months after he got married. He explained he was more or less pressured through her family to get married. He confessed that I am his dream woman and am exactly what he is looking for. I believed him and continued to allow myself to get closer and closer both emotionally and intimately.
I have since left my marriage, professed my love for my aquaman to my soon to be ex-hubby and his family and moved out so that aquaman and I can progress and move forward in our relationship. Until now, aquaman has not done the same. I expected he would move in with me and start our happy life. After all, aquaman says he loves me all the time, he tells me he wants me to be his wife and even says that I am now his wife even though not officially but in his heart he believes it. That is a sweet gesture on his part, but it does me no good when he still remains officially living with another woman whom he has a 3 year old daughter with. He says he is only like friends with the mother of his daughter whom he lives with and they sleep in separate rooms.
Truly, this is our only problem. On just about all other levels, we are perfectly happy. Aquaman doesn??t understand why I get so upset that he is not making the move to live with me and make a life with me. My point is I did it, I stood up for OUR LOVE so why can??t he do it too? He says I am his happiness so it really irritates me that he stays officially attached with the other woman. I don??t like the lies. I came clean in my own situation and stood up for my love with aquaman. Why isn??t he doing the same? I get so hurt seeing photos or chat messages with him and that woman and their daughter looking happy. Oh, this other woman is an aquarius too.
To give you a better understanding, aquaman lives with me at my apartment from monday to saturday. I have no idea how he is able to make this arrangement seem non-suspicious, but what he does is pick up the other woman from work during the week and takes her back home to where he lives with her and her parents in her parents house. Then, he plays with his daughter until around 8pm and then he leaves that house and comes to my apartment that i call ???our apartment?? to stay with me, sleep with me, make love to me, and eat what I cook for him. And the next morning I send him off to work with a homemade breakfast and lunch made by me too. And this continues the entire week. He used to stay the weekend too, but because his business is going through trouble he has moved his selling used car business to the in-laws house as they have quite a large estate for him to utilize.
I have completely committed myself with aquaman, even financially where I have helped him with his own financial problems to the amount of over USD30,000 over the three plus years we??ve been involved.
I have TRIED so hard to ignore the other woman that he feels obligated to and to be patient, but I can??t get rid of the thought he is not completely with me, yet I am COMPLETELY with him. It bother me, really bothers me.
One day, on June 18, 2013 I may have stepped too far. You see, this other woman doesn??t know about me and I happened to see her messages on his mobile phone one morning and I must have ???snapped?? emotionally and so I updated his IM profile to a photo of aquaman and me, him kissing me on my cheek and holding me tightly against him. I also updated his status message to ???i love you forever, virgo?? (well, i put my name, not virgo, but for the sake of privacy on your blog ??_. hope you get that). My action was aimed directly at the other woman. But what I didn??t realize was that it actually cost him his job. He told me he was demoted because of what I did because his boss saw it and to avoid any future problems, his boss moved him to another department where he was assigned a lower data entry position and less pay. I was so shocked!!!!! Aquaman didn??t talk to me for almost two months, BUT he stayed in contact with my teenage daughter to get updates on me. I really thought we were over and done with. Aquaman has a lot of clothes at my apartment and I was ready to pack it all up. I couldn??t do it. I was a mess, sad and depressed and missing him so much. During the silence, I tried to text, his reply was cold. Then he tried to text a few times, I remained just as cold. This short exchange of words went back and forth a few times ever week or two weeks and then silence again.
Then, on August 8, 2013, aquaman sent me a text saying ???to my wife, virgo, please forgive me of my past actions??. I was so pleased to finally get news from aquaman, I replied with ???yes, of course, with open arms always for you. to my husband, aquaman, the man i was born for??_ please forgive me as well. i miss you. ?? and then we met. I cried so hard the next day, I felt so awful that what I did affected his job!!!! I never cried like that in front of him, and what set me off was he got a phonecall from the other woman saying his daughter wanted to speak to him. Aquaman held me so close and he even cried too because he couldn??t stand seeing me cry. It was his first time he saw me so upset.
Well, in the days after, to my disappointment, the same old routine happened all over again where he still has her and keeps me on the side. And when he??s at our apartment, he is still replying to all her chat messages, making me feel second best and unimportant along the way. When aqua man was in the shower, I read her messages and saw the messages were different now compared to the messages she sent before the 2 month silence between me and aqua man. She was trying to be romantic and expressing love. I never saw this before. I was really surprised. It seems me exposing my relationship with aquaman made her want to claim him and keep him as her own. She is an aquarius too so I don??t know what the heck she is doing, I really thought she would send him away. I really hoped she would so he would finally move in with me. I??m still confused why her finding out about me and aquaman didn??t seem to have ANY lasting effect on her at all except to make her try to be closer to him.
I tried a new approach. Instead of flaunting his love with me, when I saw the woman??s messages again I didn??t get upset, instead I encouraged him to stay with her. I even sent her messages on the IM chat window pretending to be aqua man and set up a date between them. When aquaman saw me supporting his relationship with her, he got mad at me and asked why I was pretending to be him in the chat. Well, why is he surprised? Aquaman told me not to complain about the other woman anymore so I sent messages as if I was aquaman answering her, setting them up on a date to go out.
He ended up going out to dinner on the date I set up and he asked me to make him something again when he came home to me. I said I was going to bed early and I did without eating dinner. I had idea what I had just done, not sure it was even the right thing, but I didn??t want to think about it, I just wanted to sleep and get if off my mind. Aquaman arrived before midnight and tried to wake me up, but unsuccessfully. He did wake me up around 2am again, but it wasn??t for food! Afterwards, he fell fast asleep and I was left wide awake!!!!! I was so hungry and I couldn??t sleep at all. I was really irritated with him.
Maybe it was lack of sleep, maybe it was hunger, but what happened next was an escalation into the biggest argument we ever had. This happened several days ago on the morning of August 31st. It started out with me irritated he didn??t care that I ate or even try to help me get something to eat. I made a snappy comment that he had eaten dinner already and why didn??t he THINK about whether I had eaten or not. I accused him of not showing that he cares about me. The argument spun out of control on my side and it got so bad I told him I was tired of being the other woman on the side that he comes to only to get what he needs and then in the morning he leaves again. I reduced our relationship to a very rude comment by saying he only wants to f*#k me on our bed and leave me until he needs me again. Of course I don??t believe it, but I am so tired of committing to aquaman and him not making the serious step to be with me. I then proceeded to accuse him of playing with me all along while he keeps this ???real life?? in tact while ruining my life. I also added I don??t believe anything he says and I believe he is a liar. OMG, it was like a wrestling match with no holds barred. He was so confused and couldn??t grasp the reason why I was upset. Aquaman tried to twist it to blame me for sleeping and not waiting up for him to make him something to eat like he asked earlier in his text. Duh, I told him I was going to bed early! When that didn??t work, he said he doesn??t know how to cook and it is my expertise, just like if my car was broken down, he wouldn??t ask me to fix it! Oh, for crying out loud, there is absolutely no way to argue anything with an aquarius man.
Aquaman has a key to our apartment, but on that morning of August 31st, he walked out on our argument and he left his key in the door. I was behind him and I saw him pause for a moment and then he walked out. He always came back before, even if weeks after an argument, but he came back. He has his own key, he can come back anytime. This time, when aquaman left, I saw he intentionally left his key in the keyhole. I asked, ???what about your key???. He quickly replied, ???I??m leaving!??. I then slammed the door as hard as I could as he walked down the hallway towards the elevator. I was furious. His action, in my opinion, was officially showing me he is done with me.
In past, mostly, I always let him have his space and remained quiet. I always waited for aquaman to make the first move. I rarely ever made a first move to break the silence, it has always been him. I don??t know if it??s my stubbornness or if it??s respect to give him space to think, maybe both. We usually chat all day and I do miss him very much. Aquaman is still online right now, in the chat program we always use, just for us. I??m online too. We are just not saying a word. Normally I would change my profile pic and status message to something anti-aquaman if we fight. But this time I have left it, my status still says ???I am your angel, but you are my hero??. aquaman knows it is about him. I put it there the day I saw him after our nearly 2-month silence period.
I really don??t know what to do now. All I want is to be aquaman??s wife. It feels so impossible now. I struggle so much. I hurt so much emotionally. The emotional roller coaster makes me crazy, but love keeps me next to him. In the moment of anger out of this argument, I have packed all his clothes and even ripped up two shirts, but I just can??t bring myself to send the boxes of his clothes to the house where he stays with the other woman and her family.
I really am lost as to what to do now. I love him so deeply. I know he loves me deeply too. I just don??t understand why he won??t make the move that will bring him happiness. He??s even told me himself, that being with me is where his happiness is.
It??s my birthday today, Sept 4th, and I have been hoping aqua man would reach out to me. He did. At 4am this morning he sent me a chat message saying happy birthday, no emotion, just wishing me good health and lots of blessings. I replied with one word - thx. He then asked who else wished me a happy birthday so far. Seriously? Is he worried he was replaced so quickly? I thought my love and devotion was clear. This man is my everything and I know he knows this!
I hope you have some helpful advice for me. Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I tried to summarize the best I could, forgive the longevity as I tend to go on and on. I am really glad to find your blog and others like me who are going out of their minds trying to come to terms of how to deal with Aquaman.
Do you have no boundaries??? *smh*
I have no advice for you, other than we reap what we sow.
My EX-husband had an affair with a virgo. Thanks for giving me insight into a virgo homewrecker's mind.
Sorry, I can't support you on this.

What have you done?!?! That is so crazy!
I know you are devastated at this time but you'll get over it sooner than anyone else would do but dear lord, that was so pathetic.
I'm a Virgo too and one thing I learned about having a relationship with Aquarius is that you can never own them.
Move on he is not coming back.
This could be turned into a lifetime movie.
Leave him now and don't look back. It hurts like hell but get out now. I see the other posts & I get cheating is totally wrong but I hear you & read everything. Get out...get out now. He's not the one and even if he was he'll always cheat on you. Please, with everything in me get out. Change the locks, delete his number, get off the chat & any chat or social network site with him. Get out! You did put your big girl britches on & got divorced. Now do it again & get out of this toxic relationship with him. I say this with a truly sincere tone but I'm also being firm...get out now. Find yourself again...without him or any man. It will totally suck for a while but you'll be glad you did - mark my words, you'll be glad you did. Hugs!!!
Ah, the unevolved Aquaman harem. Girl, this is only gonna get worse and trust that he probably has a 3rd or 4th woman stashed away somewhere.
Your bricks of text gave me a headache.
But you are a lovely woman and that's all that matters.
This story was nice & very entertaining! OP, what do you have in your natal chart? I sense a whole lot of scorpio.
Aqua's can be like that sorry sweetie. I know, I'm an excellent liar and if I get afraid I can convince you that the moon is pink. It's because we want to understand everything, if we understand you, then we can tell you exactly what it is you want to hear.
Time to cry your tears and move on. I must admit I didn't even get half way through the wall of text. From what I read, you gave all the giving and he did all the taking. You may need to give him an ultimatum, if you want me, this is the way it's gotta be. It might help you, see him for what he is. A scared little boy, who??s good at manipulating people, to cover for being deeply unhappy with himself.
My first love was a Virgo and I??ve got a soft spot for Virgos. If you need a friend, feel free to message me.
Love and compassion x
Posted by firewaterearthvenuspisces
Ah, the unevolved Aquaman harem. Girl, this is only gonna get worse and trust that he probably has a 3rd or 4th woman stashed away somewhere.


Any man no matter the sign, no matter the bday is like this, stay away from him.
They love harems and it feeds their ego.
Having to feed an ego is perfectly normal in many cases, however, in some cases, it is very unhealthy. Especially when they begin to hurt other people and take advantage of you.
Posted by truecap
Do you have no boundaries??? *smh*
I have no advice for you, other than we reap what we sow.
My EX-husband had an affair with a virgo. Thanks for giving me insight into a virgo homewrecker's mind.
Sorry, I can't support you on this.




thanks for your comment. it takes two to tango honey. i wasn't alone in this dance with my virgo and he did chase me continuously, never giving up until he got what he wanted.... me. I understand your pain. I had a husband that loved the company of women, enough said on this. I'm sorry your ex husband hurt you. I hope you have since found a better life filled with happiness and love.
thank you everyone for your comments and advice. we are done and he reminds me of this every single day through messages. even though we are done, he still sends me dramatic texts blaming me for HURTING him. He seriously can not see that he is the one that hurt me.
Posted by whiterebbit
Aqua's can be like that sorry sweetie. I know, I'm an excellent liar and if I get afraid I can convince you that the moon is pink. It's because we want to understand everything, if we understand you, then we can tell you exactly what it is you want to hear.
Time to cry your tears and move on. I must admit I didn't even get half way through the wall of text. From what I read, you gave all the giving and he did all the taking. You may need to give him an ultimatum, if you want me, this is the way it's gotta be. It might help you, see him for what he is. A scared little boy, who??s good at manipulating people, to cover for being deeply unhappy with himself.
My first love was a Virgo and I??ve got a soft spot for Virgos. If you need a friend, feel free to message me.
Love and compassion x



thank you for the insight!!!! I really appreciate it. Aqua did convince me the moon was pink and what a beautiful shade of pink it was. hahahaha, sorry for the long dramatic life story, thank you for reading at least half of it. I agree with you, I did give and give and give while he happily took and with not much gratitude I must say sadly. I'm taking it day by day now, alone, and getting back to me.

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