Hello all,
Pisces woman here. I was in a relationship for a year with an Aqua man and we've been broken up for 10 months now. I know I should be over it but the way we ended left me with so many questions that I'm still trying to understand how he could be so cold. We lived in different cities for a huge amount of our relationship and he would come and visit me monthly. He was so romantic and would send me flowers etc but also seemed reserved with his emotions and I felt like he never truly let me in. I realize after reading more on Aquas he was probably taking his time but I must admit, I fell hard for him. He met my parents, came home with me for Thanksgiving and took me home with him to meet his entire family at Christmas.
Upon returning, he got into an argument with his boss and was let go, become distant and we began to argue almost daily. I couldn't understand why he was so distant. The more distant he became the more I confided in an old friend as I felt abandoned. He ended up finding out and thought I had been cheating and just moved out, though he kept in touch and wanted to work on things. I was so hurt that I ignored him and told him to move on for me to be happy. I realize now that I was hurt andwantes him to fight for me or at least show he cared. I didn't wish him Happy Birthday on his birthday and ignored his text messages. A few months went by and I reached out to him and he told me to never contact him again and called me 'disloyal'. Apparently, he heard from friends that I had been dating while tried to each me but truly they were all distractions. I heard from a mutual friend that he is still in love with me though. Is he gone for good? How could he go from wanting to work it out to never wanting anything to do with me? Doesn't he understand his distance hurt me? Although it's been almost a year I do miss him a lot!
Is that a typical aqua trait? To just leave and never return? It almost feels as if he never really cared at all to be honest. Maybe it's the sensitive Pisces in me but I'm truly having a difficult time understanding it
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Jan 19, 2013Comments: 1552 · Posts: 9503 · Topics: 11
You shouldn't want him to reach out....!
I'm also a Pisces who once dated an Aqua, who lost his job after 6 months of dating me intensively. Soon after he moved 300 miles away and our relationship ended.
After almost one year of NC, he got in touch and practically pretended to be my friend for another year, while I was with someone else. Once a month we met for lunch/dinner, during which he made other feelings and intentions known, that he loved me, wanted to get back with me, in fact come back to my town and live with me!
Long story shot, my other relationship ended naturally, and I gave the Aqua another chance. It lasted about 8 months this time. It ended with the same old shit...he never moved here and blamed his new job for being too demanding and suggested us to be just friends. That made me angry.....so angry that I don't want to hear from him again, let alone be friends.
I suggest you get another guy asap.
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Jan 19, 2013Comments: 1552 · Posts: 9503 · Topics: 11
"I heard from a mutual friend that he is still in love with me though. Is he gone for good?"
Yes!
Being "still in love" with someone doesn't matter for an Aqua, if things went sour......they always put themselves first and so should you!
Thank you for all your replies. I never intended to hurt his feelings honestly! The constant arguing and the circumstances that we were in were very foreign to me. I wasn't accustomed to him not communicating and shutting me out. It just hurt that someone who would move over 1,000 miles to be closer to me, make time to spend with my family and myself multiples times and allow me to meet everyone close to him would stop communicating and become so cold. I'm not accustomed to that.
I ignored him because I was hurt too!! When he would text me or call and leave voicemails in my head it felt like why now? Why not a few weeks ago? It may sound selfish but it just felt like he was telli me what I wanted to hear at the time. After hearing your responses I see things differently.
As for his job, he was trying to start his own business and his boss found out and told him to shut it down or be let go, I guess he decided the latter. I've never dated someone who did those type of things which is why It was difficult to understand why he would cut off communication as opposed to speaking to me. You Aquas are AMAZING individuals but so complex in relationships ?
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Jun 25, 2012Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
OP, aside from a few things, what the Aquas wrote was on point. You tried to manipulate a situation vs trying to talk it out and understand his point of view and it backfired. You then took it further by trying to force a reaction that wasn't necessary (e.g. fight for you) when the man was clearly hoping to reconcile. Seriously, save that nonsense for the movies. I get you were hurt, but you really pushed it too far. It all sounds like a lot of unnecessary drama to me.
Take it as a life lesson and do better with the next guy.