Is this Aquarius Guy into me?

I recently met this guy (of course he is an Aquarius) and we totally hit it off. He's great. Funny, charming, smart, etc. I just can't tell how he feels about me. I think that he is into me sometimes. It's not like he calls all the time (and from reading this board, Aquarius don't talk on the phone much). We text/email, etc..but it's just annoying. And it drives me CRAZY! I can't stand that he is so ALOOF and hard to read. I don't want to be the one pursuing him, and I've been told not to and back off and let him come to me. But then I get worried and think if I don't pursue, then he will not be interested. Maybe I'm just too impatient? Is it even worth it? WHAT TO DO?? :*(

if you don't have patience, and you don't want to be the one pursuing... then this isn't the guy for you. that is all i have to say

Arrghhh! Patience. patience..boo-hoo!

It is quite funny though how everyone says it over and over again about all the characterisitics of Aquarius. Aloof, detached, unemotional, etc. And yes, they do throw out mixed signals. "I like you today." "Leave me alone tomorrow."
Crazy!!

Hey Ariesgirl....why do you want to be with someone who drives you crazy? RED FLAG....ALERT!

check internal systems...crazy people end up in uh....places I don't want to visit!

I don't know. Men drive me crazy! Does that mean I'm not supposed to be with a guy? 😛

Maybe you could try and turn the tables around with driving him crazy for a change. Be aloof, not so available, independent, busy. I'm sure he'll wonder what you're doing if he can't get a whole of you when he wants.

No, absolutely not...maybe you need to explore why guys drive you crazy?

Some guys will drive ya nuts and others will not. It is YOUR choice as to how you choose to experience your relationships. I have crossed "crazymakers" off my list years ago...they take too much energy and I personally would rather use my energy in a more positive place.

I am taking a step back and not contacting him. We'll see. The other problem is that we don't even live in the same city. So that makes it much more difficult and annoying.
Oh why does he have to be an Aquarius? Why can't he be an Aries like me—

I like you. You like me. Ok. that's it. no games. Games are dumb! 😢

I don't know why guys drive me crazy??😛

I suppose I would rather direct my energy to someone who is into me right away. But then I would be smothered..and I don't like that either! ahhhh!! relationships are so hard..

How do you communicate then since you don't live in the same city? Do you see each other once in a while? Do you converse via internet or phone/text message?

Well..we had texted/emailed for awhile..and then we finally met face to face about a month ago. So that was the big test whether we had "chemistry" or not. Cuz you can have this great "relationship" with someone via online and when you meet it could not work out. Anyhooo..we totally hit it off..and since we've met we've talked more than before. But it just doesn't feel that it's enough. I don't want to push it, cuz there is the obstacle of not living in the same city. But at the same time, he is very flirty with me and sends me mixed signals that he's into me..but then I don't hear from him for a while (ie. a whole week). And then I end up "giving in" and emailing or calling and then he gets back to me. Quite annoying! I think he should take it upon himself to make the effort to come out to see me. I saw him (but it was just cuz I was in his city that we met up.) But I think that he should (if he's truly into me) come and visit. Is that wrong?

"But it just doesn't feel that it's enough." and you are not trusting that feeling why?

Thanks GL 😉

"But I think that he should (if he's truly into me) come and visit. Is that wrong?" Ariesgirl, your feelings are never wrong - trust them!

When you are with the "right" guy, you will not be having these doubts - you will know in your heart that all is well and there will be no asking questions.

It's not enough cuz I want him to be pursuing me more. It's nice to have the guy make MORE of the effort to pursue the girl. I think the problem is that I don't get to talk to him as much as I would like. but when we do it's great..but then I feel, it's cuz I made the effort first. Know what i mean? It's a stupid game that men and women have to play. So dumb! 😢

That's true.. "if I'm with the "right" guy..then there will be no doubts.

Just a thought and please don't take offense...in your above comment you said, "I want him to be pursuing me more."

If he wanted to he would be - maybe he just is not that into you the way you want him to be. I'd say NEXT! and move on my friend....you deserve better treatment than that!

Thanks, Freebird. I don't take offense. But then reading all this message board about Aquarius and "how they take awhile to really get into you, they don't show their emotions, have patience, etc." Don't you think I should take that into consideration as well? I mean it's not like we are officially dating yet. I am keeping my "options" opened and really trying not to just hang on to him, exclusively.

No, it's not wrong for you wanting him to come and visit you. He should do so but only if he wants to. You can't force the situation and it has to be his idea of wanting to visit you.

It's normal for guys to not take contact with girls. Sometimes it can go weeks before a guy will take contact. I've read someone wrote what seems like a week of waiting for girls is like a day for guys. Guys don't seem to have the need to be in as much contact as us girls would like. Then we start thinking when they haven't contacted us what's up. Probably nothing. I've gone through the waiting thing also with days and weeks going by before I heard from guys. It used to frustrate the living daylights out of me. Then I got tough and figured life goes on. If they call they call and if they don't they don't. I have a guy now who is something like your guy. I would hear from him every day for 2 months. Then he started to back off. I was like what's going on. Now he's back. I talked with him last weekend 5 times. Then I didn't hear from all week now. He called me early early Saturday morning. I was surprised to say the least.

I know what you mean about giving in when you haven't heard from him in a while that you either e-mail or call him. I've done this too. Big mistake. You shouldn't have to do anything like that. He should want to take contact with you without you having to take the first step. I learnt that as long as I didn't do anything they will take contact with you. It's hard but you have to stay firm. You see, I'm an Aquarian and I believe in fairness. I feel it should go both ways with who calls who. I don't see what difference it makes if I call or if he calls (the guy in my case). Well, I learnt that as long as I always took the initiative, well, then he didn't have to do anything. When I backed off then he finally got the hint. Of course there where times I was wondering what was wrong with the guy in my case like wasn't he getting the hint. The guy in my case went as long as 2 1/2 weeks before I heard from him.

Just hang in there. Don't do anything now. Live your life and when he takes contact with you just act natural.

I know. Either you're so into the guy and he's not quite into you. And then there are those guys who are so into you and you're like "whooaa! take a step back, dude!". 😛

Thanks, Mystical! 🙂 That was a good positive outlook and perspective on the situation. And yes, I have not brought up the conversation about coming out to see me anymore. I feel that if he wants to, he will.

It is very true how a week for a girl is eons, but to a guy it's like no big deal. And yes, it should be in fairness as far as if the relationship is going to go anywhere. BOTH parties need to take the initiative.

Ahhhhhh!! I have officially made today as the first day to stop pursuing him and just going on with my life as happy as can be. He's just a guy and I should not get so worked up over him.

So, since you are an Aquarius yourself, do you find yourself being aloof when you like someone? And finding it hard to express your emotions?

It's kind of interesting how signs really do indicate how a person is.

I am a TOTAL Aries..Very Impatient and wanting things Yesterday! hahaha! 🙂

Glad to help you out. I always try to look on the positive side of a situation. Sometimes I have been so frustrated in the past few months with the guy in my case but I learnt a very valuable lesson. The lesson is PATIENCE. You have to be patient so the guy can see you can live your life without them. No guy wants a girl to be dependent on them. I'm never dependent on a guy ever. Although I feel if the guy really likes you then he will pursue you. I sometimes get that mixed up if I'm going to be honest. I think why not call him since he's called me so much. As soon as I did that, then I didn't hear from him. That is why I backed off because I saw as soon as I wanted to be fair things went wrong. I mean waiting 2 1/2 weeks was annoying but I stood my ground.

Yes, I do find it difficult showing my emotions to someone I like. I think this has to do with I don't want to lose controll over myself. I know when I like someone I really like them but at times I have difficulty showing them. Then they think I don't like them which is not the case at all. You see, I want to make sure the guy is worthy of me and of course that takes a lot of time for me realize. If the guy doesn't want to take things slow then he's not the right one. Yes, I am a aloof. Sometimes to a fault. I can be doing so many different things that love does get put on the back burner. I do know that when I find THE ONE, he will be a main priority of mine because he has proven himself to me. I set friendship and loyalty very highly. Most guys I come across want to have sex first and then want to get to know me. That not what I'm about at all. Basically, I'm a challenge. The right guy will take the challenge and then I'll know he's the one.

I can tell you one thing regarding this Aquarian guy. Don't want to start a relationship with him now. Be his FRIEND. Aquarians are very friendly oriented. You might scare him away if you are too pushy. If he wants something more with you, he will let you know.

Yes.. I think that's the case. We are trying to get to know each other and I guess that's the first step that we need to take. To be HIS FRIEND first and see where that leads. He says really nice things to me.."how I'm such a NORMAL girl. I am totally cute..etc." I guess I shall take that with a grain of salt.

BTW..about the visting me, when we spoke awhile back, he did acknowledge that he "does need to come out and see ME, and also his buddies, etc.". So I guess he does know that he has to..But like I said..I haven't brought it up again. He is also a very busy guy with his job. He travels A LOT for work. So that's another problem. He always seems to be traveling to another city for work..or he seems to have friends visiting him all the time. He seems to be quite a very sociable person. And I think if I do truly want to be in his life, that I just need him to come to the realization that he does want me in his life. The challenge of course is that we live in a different city, so that makes it more effort for both parties to make it work. So I'll cross my fingers, but won't sit around waiting for the phone to ring and just continue to live my life as happy as can be!🙂

GeminiLover,

So since you are an Aquarius do you think Aquarius and Aries can be compatible? I know you are divorced from one. Just curious...

I dont mean to sound like a know-it-all, but if you cant take his easy detachment NOW, it wont work out. This is just a life we have. The longer you are with an aqua, the more detached they get. Sometimes, I feel like the ONLY sign that understands me is a Libra. No questions asked, it's always understood & never taken personally. //I completely relate on the phone issue. That's just another thing to tag me down. // Love is not the issue.. it's the BREATHING room. We are flowing free spirits. We dont have a problem being faithfull- it's not that. We just require lots of space to let our thoughts flow. Has this helped at all? As I said before, it's not something to take personally. He's not going against you & nothing is wrong if he pulls back a little. All will still be well. I wish more ppl could understand that

Aquarius_8i8-

Thanks! No, you do not sound like a know-it-all. 🙂

So I can take a "breather" and say that since I haven't heard from Aqua guy that he has not gone on to other girls? If he does, I can't really get pissed, cuz like I said it's not like we're dating. We've only just recently met. But I would like to think that he is into me and it is just gonna take us longer to get to know each other. I know, it's just my natural tendencies to think that he has forgotten about me. But as you and others have said, it's his way of having some space.

GL-

Thanks! And yes, "if Aquarius can show they care, then both can be happy!" 🙂 I like that! That's all I need to know from Aqua guy. Then I can relax..hahahhaa!

Arianlatay,

Well..what can you tell about your experiences?? Are you still dating your Aqua guy? Has everything that's been discussed true? Were you pursuing him a lot? Was he aloof? Emotionally detached? Barely called ya? Did you have to back off? Did he eventually come around? Was it worth the wait? You must like Aquarius cuz ya dated a few of them. Come to think of it..I think I also dated a few too. LOL! But this one seems to be the one that I actually care about to see if it's gonna work out! 🙂

Why are we so IMPATIENT?? But I have to say we eventually get what we want...most of the time! 😛

Arianlatay,
Hum..sounds like you got the Aqua guy figured out. So when you said..

"Did you have to back off?" Yeah but I think it made things worse. Thats another story.

What happened? You backed off and then he disappeared?

It's good to know that you are an Aries and know where I'm coming from as far as the impatient thing. I do not show that I am needy. And I am really trying not to get too frustrated. Ok. it's funny too, cuz it's not like that I like to talk on the phone all the time. But I think it's just a "reassurance thing" when he calls me that he's thinking of me. I think that's it. If he sends me a text or email, then it makes me happy. Even if it's the dumbest thing. Know what I mean? I think us Aries needs that "attention" from the other person to let us know that they're thinking of us. I don't know..or maybe that's just me. It definitely helps to know that I am not the only one that is going through this with an Aqua guy. 🙂

Primegan,

"I don't want to be the one pursuing him, and I've been told not to and back off and let him come to me."

Umm..a lot of friends have told this to me. Don't you agree?

Primegan/Arianlatay:

hahahhaha! Well, of course I want HIM. But to be chased is great! 😛

Primegan,

Ok..nice to finally get a guy's opinion on Aqua guys. 🙂

Well..fine I will have to just take it one day at a time and see how this whole thing plays out. But of course I guess I have to be patient. And i hate games too. And I'm not saying that I would do the "You chase me thing." But at the same time, I want to see if he is truly interested in me. That's all. And it's not only that he's an Aqua guy. In any relationship, I feel that a guy should have to come to the realization too that if he truly is into a girl then he'll make the move. It's always (most of the time) that the girl is all into it first. Did I just make any sense? 🙂

Arianlatay,

I suppose I do need attention. Blame it on my sign! 🙂 hahaha! 🙂 🙂 🙂

Arianlatay,

Re: smiley face.. um..just use the colon and parentheses. 🙂

"why do you want to be with someone who drives you crazy? RED FLAG....ALERT!
"

"That is only one of many ways to view the situation, far from the ONLY way."

Primegen - don't believe I said it was the ONLY way but it sure is an indication of what is to come if it is already present in the relationship. Hey, for pete's sake Mr. - me thinks I read somewhere where you said if a woman's eyes look "crazy" you won't date her... What gives?

Relationships...the BEST advice is the advice of one's own heart. If we take the time to go within, we can find the answers. Others can only give us their perspective from what they have experienced.

Bottom line - if the relationship feels good to YOU then go for it and have fun 😉

"I have crossed "crazymakers" off my list years ago"

Really, then why do you keep coming here? 🙂

Well, Primegen....I don't recall saying or implying that the Aquas are/were "crazymakers" Are you saying you are a "crazymaker?" 😉

what are ya talking about onefineaqua?

ooooohhh! hahahahahhaa! sorry PrimegEn! 😛

aww Prime! I was missed? hehe

I would also like to add, DONT hunt him down with a phone, texting OR calling. As if I'm detached enough before? I get further away when someone tries to keep tabs on me. That's way too possessive. He is making his own decisions & if they are questioned or ridiculed, it wont feel the need to trust you with much else. He'll be glad he keot his distance.

Now, I need to say that his character is also involved here (ways he grew up, his other signs, etc) But I can tell you as an aqua, just let him flow- freely. When he comes back aorund, he'll make up for all the time lost.

It's not a sense of IGNORING either. It's just being mentaly & emotionaly independent.

Nope, the coffee house scene is really changing. I'm starting to despise it. You can tell who reads to many magazines or watches too much tv, lol!

I'm fine tuning my veganism to raw! I'm feeling great.

What's up with you?

ofq, I'm a scorpio rising so I know what you mean....

I feel so selfish a lot of the time because it's like I never treat someone the way I prefer things, but I would never push an aqua. I know how that feels.

aww prime, I hope you dont leave anytime soon?

raw is better NOT dehydrated. The fresher the better & NOTHING underipe because it becomes too acidic for your system.

I dont go by cookbooks to be honest with you. As boring as this sounds, I love simplisity (spelling?) I just eat some oranges in the morning, a big salad of mixed greens for lunch & frozen blueberries for dinner. I eat 2 cucumbers a day & blueberries everyday for the antioxidents. The cucumbers help to rid the body of toxins.

goodnight my dear Primegen


Goodnight, onefineaqua

But it's not like i'm "HUNTING" him down with phone, text, email..i'm just saying "What's up?" Is that so wrong?? Besides..most of the time.. i'd say 95% of the time he actually gets back to me. So if I were truly "buggin" him he could not respond back. riiggght— 🙂

aries girl,
My aqua was like this at the start, all the same traits-lucky for me we share very similar traits-and i felt he was worth it, so i stuck around. Not only has he taught me more about being patient,hes taught me a few more lessons-non verbal. It also helped me understand my sun sign-im an aqua too.
Tex messages are ok-to say im going to be ten minutes late or something, but ramdon whats up? maybe this makes him feel, like hes never going to be the hunter-let him track u down first.
Im not really into phone messages, neither is he. maybe thats an aqua thing. My friends will tex me whats up, and then it will have to go into a a texting conversation for 20 mins, id rather just pick the phone up, and speak, and thats it. Although i do use messaging on my phone, if im lazy to talk, or just want to say it quickly.
I have it prety good with my aqua man. Hes been missing for a week-not missing exactly-just we've not met up-just talked on the phone.
Im getting comfortable with this-as it give me loads of time for my work, early nights, my books and thoughts. I know that when we do meet it will be a fresh -i like it like that.
u can find alot of good avice from other people on this forem, so listen up! they are worth it, if u like puzzels.

hi sweetie!!! i was thinking about posting u! and was wondering how that situation was! well u sound much better! good girl. and it prob is not over-now u have shown him ur prepared to do the friendship thing, he'll feel easier to be around u ect....and if u feels its not over, it probably isn't!

Primgen, re -raw food diet, thats my diet-so if u want any book names, tips -id be happy.one good book is-prescription for energy.

Arian- "im so dumb sometimes bc i hardly think about the bad stuff" thats how u should be!! in anything, not just him, be positive-its the only way foward. never focus on bad, its all yesterdays news.