New here and broken hearted

Hello everyone

I am new here and was hoping for some advice about the aqua man I have been seeing for a year and a half.

I met him at a local club we both went to.Over the next few months we saw each other several times a week and it was great.

We had the "where is this going talk" at a few weeks and agreed that we needed to get to know each other much more and longer before anything would get serious.We have seen others the entire time we have been seeing each other.
Sometimes this caused drama as other girls he met and dated even less time then me would get jealous when he told them the same thing he told me that he wasn't ready for a serious relationship and he would tell me I was the only girl willing to give him freedom and space and grow into a solid friendship and that was more important to him then anything.

3 weeks into the relationship I had heard a rumor he was in love with someone so I asked if i should step back.he got angry,not at me but at the other girl saying I don't love her.we only dated 2 weeks and she was so pushy.I don't love her! I don't love you! I don't love anyone! I was surprised he was saying that about me because at the point of course we didn't love each other ,we'd just met

Over the months we got closer and closer and he started opening up to me about family life,his hopes and dreams, things he held dear. This meant alot to me as he is a very private person.I was finding out that while he wasn't a kissy feely guy and didn't like showing emotions his actions were proving that I was important to him. He was very caring and sweet and loving when we were alone together,yet at the club he practically ignored me because of "club drama" He'd say hi and we'd speak but we both were careful to keep our private relationship just that..private

He started introducing me to other friends and his family.met my family. anytime one of us was down or sad we were there for each other.He started inviting me to hang out with his family all the time,we would have long conversations about all kinds of things in person and on the phone.Thinsg just got better and better.By this point we had had another talk about what we were to each other and he told me that I was a romantic interest and a very good friend and he cared about me more then he wanted to admit but didn't want a relationship with anyone because of his illness causing so many problems in his life plus he didn't rush things.That was fine with me and I honestly was ok with it although I was starting to fall for him

Both of us were still seeing others. a couple of times he saw me out with someone and was civil but would get this strange flash of "something" on his face when he saw me with someone else.he was seeing others too but we didn't reallytell each other who.he just saw me sometimes and I would find out who frankly because everytime almost the girl would try to get a committment from him within a month,he would say no and shed tell everyone what a player he was. To me I dont think he was a player because he was honest with me and the others that he ddnt want to be exclusive.

then came a stretch where we werent seeing others not by decision really ,but he'd say things like I'm not really seeing anyone else right now or make a point to say well that girl you saw me with at the club is a friend only nothing romantic.I had pretty much stopped seeing others without saying anything.I didnt want him to think i was tryiing to rush him but I didn't want to see anyone else by then so we had a few months of that.I should also say that after every time he started showing intense caring,tenderness or we seemed very connected he'd then dissapear on me a week or two.we'd talk on the phone some but a couple times not even that but I just tried to be patient and give him his space and every time just when i thought it was over he would come back and we would get even closer and he would get ev

My sentiments to you.

Hopefully, things will take an extreme change for the better and you'll be all smiles. But please do take care.

Elliot!