temporary withdrawal

Profile picture of sassafras
sassafras
@sassafras
11 Years

Comments: 6 · Posts: 296 · Topics: 4
Yes! I always work and deal with people and at the end of the day I wanna chill all alone. Its like a social-stress. I need to de-socialize or ill blow up at someone. Its hard to do when I used to live with others. People take it personally when you just want to be left alone but it's never about *them*, its about me having to recharge. I just want to come home, chill, make myself something, maybe catch upon something or throw a game on, maybe listen to music, snug my cat and just be alone for a bit.

An Aries ex of mine would get so hurt and pissy when I would suggest he go hang out with his friends. I can see why people would feel hurt but no one thinks of the person coming home. Its like being a soda bottle that was shook up all day and then you get home, hoping for things to go down and BAM! Someone won't leave you alone. Now its a huge mess when it didn't have to be.
Profile picture of justagirl
SelenaKyle
@justagirl
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 6657 · Posts: 25221 · Topics: 77
Posted by sassafras
Yes! I always work and deal with people and at the end of the day I wanna chill all alone. Its like a social-stress. I need to de-socialize or ill blow up at someone. Its hard to do when I used to live with others. People take it personally when you just want to be left alone but it's never about *them*, its about me having to recharge. I just want to come home, chill, make myself something, maybe catch upon something or throw a game on, maybe listen to music, snug my cat and just be alone for a bit.



This, 100% . I get where I don't even want to chat via text, Skype or whatnot. Need ME time.
Profile picture of IAmMystified
IAmMystified
@IAmMystified
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 4 · Posts: 1030 · Topics: 51
Well i'm not talking about deepest feelings I'm talking about jsut wanting space/alone time.

At least the aqua i know, seems to let people that don't matter to him whent hey interrupt his "wanting alone time" he goes into entertainer mood.

But god forbid i interupt him I get half ass answers. I know its because I"m "different" as true cap is

But it still hurts 😢
Profile picture of aquasnoz
aquasnoz
@aquasnoz
14 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 362 · Posts: 10167 · Topics: 100
Alone time might just be getting out of the headspace. I can be happpily enjoying my alone time with a different group of friends. Happily sharing my alone time with my SO or whichever.

I don't like leaving the people I care about in the dark I make an effort to let them know if something is wrong. Or it could just be me wanting some time to do something. Either way I expect to go about my merry way with no further prying or interrogation.
Profile picture of aquasnoz
aquasnoz
@aquasnoz
14 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 362 · Posts: 10167 · Topics: 100
Also given your example.

Do you want to be the 'friend' that he just entertains so he can blow you off? In some sense I feel like he's actually viewing you more than some random friend because he had the expectation of you understanding his need for alone time.

Alone time is a selfish gesture so you can't view it anything other than being selfish. To me there's a balance between the need to be selfish and the need to be selfless.
Profile picture of The_eleventh_sign_11
Eleventh
@The_eleventh_sign_11
16 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 6313 · Topics: 313
I'm currently dealing with a friend who is seriously getting on my nerves and has got to be around me 24/7 and I feel like I want to crawl into a ball and die in a non dramatic way.

Its not enough for me to tell him I don't want to hang out today he always has to ask why I don't want to hang out to which I never have a suitable answer for him. He always trys to fix whatever problem I have that hinders him hanging out with me when I just want to say "Get a fucking clue I don't want to hang with you"!??_??_But I was raised right and was taught that if somethings not nice then don't say it so I try to be nice and tell him lies that i get caught out on and he gets all shitty and then I have to deal with him being a little shit cunt etc??_...

I tried talking to him yesterday that I needed to talk about him being over all the time and he started to cry and go into abandonment mode and I hadn't even begun to talk about how I feel.

people ask why we are detached but seriously this is what my human interactions are like.

I'm sick and tired of people being clueless and inconsiderate of other peoples space and feelings??_??_I may be detached but I am so considerate and thoughtful that it hurts and sometimes I feel like aqua is the most considerate because others don't give a fuck

Profile picture of The_eleventh_sign_11
Eleventh
@The_eleventh_sign_11
16 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 6313 · Topics: 313
Posted by Sugarfoot
What's so hard about telling someone you enjoy their company but you need time to yourself every now and then to recharge and relax? No need to make up lies.



Because id rather people think I were sky diving than sitting at home reading a book??_??_.Theres just a lot more to it as well I'm involved in community projects and I see him a lot and we have the same friends and stuff and its just that I may be his only friend at the moment and he's acting like drowning cat clawing anything he can get a grip on at the moment.

I don't want to lie but it just comes out its programmed in my brain to lie if someone asks me a question regarding my time. like working when your boss asks you what your doing so they can get you to work for them and you would lie on the spot to make up that I was busy.

Anyway its my problem that I'm dealing with and I've never taken the easy route in life have always done everything the hard way.

My only regret is getting caught up in my small lies which is just sloppy and pathetic I know but I think I need to give up trying to control the flow of people around me all together.


Profile picture of mz
mz
@mz
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 482 · Topics: 3
Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
Posted by Sugarfoot
What's so hard about telling someone you enjoy their company but you need time to yourself every now and then to recharge and relax? No need to make up lies.



Because id rather people think I were sky diving than sitting at home reading a book??_??_.Theres just a lot more to it as well I'm involved in community projects and I see him a lot and we have the same friends and stuff and its just that I may be his only friend at the moment and he's acting like drowning cat clawing anything he can get a grip on at the moment.

I don't want to lie but it just comes out its programmed in my brain to lie if someone asks me a question regarding my time. like working when your boss asks you what your doing so they can get you to work for them and you would lie on the spot to make up that I was busy.

Anyway its my problem that I'm dealing with and I've never taken the easy route in life have always done everything the hard way.

My only regret is getting caught up in my small lies which is just sloppy and pathetic I know but I think I need to give up trying to control the flow of people around me all together.


click to expand




tell the truth and it will be much easier...for you...as about the others...it's their business how they cope with it...