"The one"

This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by pennystealing123 on Monday, March 21, 2016 and has 17 replies.
Hey Aquas, I see a lot of posts about aquas being sure when they have found "the one."

What does that mean to you?

What happens to you emotionally, mentally, when the person you have been with for so long isn't "the one" that you thought? Like that partner ends up cheating on you, or was lying about something, or their attitude changes (ex, they become less humble).

What's your plan of action then? Do you still hold on for dear life? Do you detach?

General question... Thanks for reading
Real Love for an Aqua is like finding out Santa Claus is real.
Posted by Gennie
Real Love for an Aqua is like finding out Santa Claus is real.

LOL! Indeed. So true.
Sometimes I think we just know the one when we see them. I never believed in knowing at first sight, but I do now that it happened to me. I saw a guy two years back at a coffee shop and something inside me said, "That's my guy!" I didn't take it to mean romantically because I don't believe in it and I was still skeptical. He wasn't my usual taste and even his walk screamed "lack of confidence/shy", but I just liked him. There was something about him I couldn't explain. Ironically, I did end up coming across him 2 days after seeing him at the coffee shop. I made it a mission to get to know him to see what he was all about and why something inside me thought he was the one. I did and what I find surprising is the things I ended up doing for this guy which I would normally not do. Nothing came of it. The end.

My point is basically the extent we would go to for the one is insane.
Posted by FutureSeeker
The minute I was able to figure out how to free myself from my toxic ex- I detached emotionally faster than I could blink.
We became strangers. My life had two parts- then and now.

I've dated, I've liked men, I've cared for a few deeply, but none have hit me as deep as I feel with my Cancer man. I've always felt suffocated in a relationship. Always been afraid of committing, that somehow it will "clip my wings" and I won't be able to be my "butterfly" self. With my Cancer man, my heart feels so full of love. I actually feel clingy. I actually miss him. Me, the woman who didn't miss anyone when she was deployed, misses her man during the work day. I miss his presence. I feel solid with him. I feel so fixated on him. I love him, and I would do anything to make him smile. He has brought a special sunshine to my life when it has been raining for so so long. That's just how I know.

Stupid cancer men and their knack of bringing a freedom oriented, unemotional and commitment phobe Aqua to her knees. I stay away from them. I don't like emotions because they make me feel weak and out of control. No Bueno! Cancies can do that to an Aqua and I just don't like that effect.
So aquas, have you ever felt like you were wrong about "the one?"

If so, how did you handle it?
Posted by aquarius09
Posted by FutureSeeker
The minute I was able to figure out how to free myself from my toxic ex- I detached emotionally faster than I could blink.
We became strangers. My life had two parts- then and now.

I've dated, I've liked men, I've cared for a few deeply, but none have hit me as deep as I feel with my Cancer man. I've always felt suffocated in a relationship. Always been afraid of committing, that somehow it will "clip my wings" and I won't be able to be my "butterfly" self. With my Cancer man, my heart feels so full of love. I actually feel clingy. I actually miss him. Me, the woman who didn't miss anyone when she was deployed, misses her man during the work day. I miss his presence. I feel solid with him. I feel so fixated on him. I love him, and I would do anything to make him smile. He has brought a special sunshine to my life when it has been raining for so so long. That's just how I know.

Stupid cancer men and their knack of bringing a freedom oriented, unemotional and commitment phobe Aqua to her knees. I stay away from them. I don't like emotions because they make me feel weak and out of control. No Bueno! Cancies can do that to an Aqua and I just don't like that effect.
click to expand

what is it with this combo? Brings me to my knees and yaaaaaa I want my otherside back lol but not really, but i do. GAHHHHH Wonder if its just cancer men/aqua woman. because i don't see the opposite combo much.
Posted by justagirl
Posted by aquarius09
Posted by FutureSeeker
The minute I was able to figure out how to free myself from my toxic ex- I detached emotionally faster than I could blink.
We became strangers. My life had two parts- then and now.

I've dated, I've liked men, I've cared for a few deeply, but none have hit me as deep as I feel with my Cancer man. I've always felt suffocated in a relationship. Always been afraid of committing, that somehow it will "clip my wings" and I won't be able to be my "butterfly" self. With my Cancer man, my heart feels so full of love. I actually feel clingy. I actually miss him. Me, the woman who didn't miss anyone when she was deployed, misses her man during the work day. I miss his presence. I feel solid with him. I feel so fixated on him. I love him, and I would do anything to make him smile. He has brought a special sunshine to my life when it has been raining for so so long. That's just how I know.

Stupid cancer men and their knack of bringing a freedom oriented, unemotional and commitment phobe Aqua to her knees. I stay away from them. I don't like emotions because they make me feel weak and out of control. No Bueno! Cancies can do that to an Aqua and I just don't like that effect.

what is it with this combo? Brings me to my knees and yaaaaaa I want my otherside back lol but not really, but i do. GAHHHHH Wonder if its just cancer men/aqua woman. because i don't see the opposite combo much.
click to expand

What's up with this combo you ask? Well, it's the clash of the two complementary that need each other to survive. It's the perfect blend of emotions and logic. They provide what we lack and we give them what they lack. I don't know any real life cancer woman/aqua male combos, but I've seen quite a few on dxp.
My problem is I find someone I like then I make them go crazy by shaking them up constantly when they become comolacent, I need someone who is like organised chaos, someone who naturally keeps me mentally stimulated and has a grounding effect on me.

That feeling I get when I think someone is the one makes me so happy with relief, you know that feeling when you know everything's gonna be ok, it's that coming home feeling, security, being under the blankets rubbing your toasty feet together feeling and you let yourself feel that because it's nice, then you realise it's not gonna work out because that's not what you want and you're not right for each other and you're not getting any younger and there's plenty of fish in the sea.

I think my biggest problem is insecurity in a relationship, I'm floaty and not present, anything could happen at any moment, my whole grasp on reality is firm one minute I know everything the next the sky is falling
Posted by pennystealing123
So aquas, have you ever felt like you were wrong about "the one?"

If so, how did you handle it?

LOL! Perfect timing to ask this question because I'm going through that right now. I'm heartbroken even though I'm not showing any of it. Nobody would believe me if I told them that I'm nursing a heartbreak, but it's deep within me. Honestly, it sucks what I'm feeling right now. I normally avoid getting into pointless relationships because I dread heartbreak, but who would've thought that you can face the same kind of pain without dating the person. I feel like I just got dumped without getting dumped. LOL
Posted by BeAcancer7191
My aqua husband explained that he knew within three days of just day to day conversation with me. He thought he was nuts, and put it in the back of mind a- lot, but the more we spoke. The more vivid it became.

He fought it as he's never been one to be affectionate, or "mushy." Lol.

He literally would push me away for hours to a week, or he would become distant and keep to himself. One day he told me "I can't do this. I need to be alone."

After that day it has happened so many times. I was done. Within the same hour he was calling..texting..pleading forgiveness..

Nowwww an entire year later..we are married, he's stuck to me at the hip, and we have a baby on the way. Lol.

Love for an aqua person might be push and pull factor.

Even today he still has a distance about him, but we are so close now that if I do the same thing he says " you wouldn't like if I did that, let's talk."

I love him so much, everyday with him is definitely new. Only thing...he's more introverted than I am. So I have to sometimes drag him out the house lol

Aww this is a cute story. Yes, I do a lot of push and pull. I can't help it Sad
nfi, I'll let you know when I find them.
Posted by aquanib
Posted by aquarius09
Posted by pennystealing123
So aquas, have you ever felt like you were wrong about "the one?"

If so, how did you handle it?

LOL! Perfect timing to ask this question because I'm going through that right now. I'm heartbroken even though I'm not showing any of it. Nobody would believe me if I told them that I'm nursing a heartbreak, but it's deep within me. Honestly, it sucks what I'm feeling right now. I normally avoid getting into pointless relationships because I dread heartbreak, but who would've thought that you can face the same kind of pain without dating the person. I feel like I just got dumped without getting dumped. LOL

You flirted on a longer timeframe, ie not just once, thought too much of it and it kinda all went to shyte in the end? If so, never flirt without a condom! ;D
click to expand


NOpe. You got me confused with someone else.
Finding "the one" might also depend on probability. You never know...maybe your soulmate is on the other side of the planet. We're usually restricted to a small selection of choices based on our current location. Perhaps the one you were meant to be with existed thousands of years ago or somewhere far into the future.


Posted by BeAcancer7191
My aqua husband explained that he knew within three days of just day to day conversation with me. He thought he was nuts, and put it in the back of mind a- lot, but the more we spoke. The more vivid it became.

He fought it as he's never been one to be affectionate, or "mushy." Lol.

He literally would push me away for hours to a week, or he would become distant and keep to himself. One day he told me "I can't do this. I need to be alone."

After that day it has happened so many times. I was done. Within the same hour he was calling..texting..pleading forgiveness..

Nowwww an entire year later..we are married, he's stuck to me at the hip, and we have a baby on the way. Lol.

Love for an aqua person might be push and pull factor.

Even today he still has a distance about him, but we are so close now that if I do the same thing he says " you wouldn't like if I did that, let's talk."

I love him so much, everyday with him is definitely new. Only thing...he's more introverted than I am. So I have to sometimes drag him out the house lol

Sounds exhausting!
Posted by FutureSeeker
Posted by aquarius09
Posted by FutureSeeker
The minute I was able to figure out how to free myself from my toxic ex- I detached emotionally faster than I could blink.
We became strangers. My life had two parts- then and now.

I've dated, I've liked men, I've cared for a few deeply, but none have hit me as deep as I feel with my Cancer man. I've always felt suffocated in a relationship. Always been afraid of committing, that somehow it will "clip my wings" and I won't be able to be my "butterfly" self. With my Cancer man, my heart feels so full of love. I actually feel clingy. I actually miss him. Me, the woman who didn't miss anyone when she was deployed, misses her man during the work day. I miss his presence. I feel solid with him. I feel so fixated on him. I love him, and I would do anything to make him smile. He has brought a special sunshine to my life when it has been raining for so so long. That's just how I know.

Stupid cancer men and their knack of bringing a freedom oriented, unemotional and commitment phobe Aqua to her knees. I stay away from them. I don't like emotions because they make me feel weak and out of control. No Bueno! Cancies can do that to an Aqua and I just don't like that effect.

Oh- I definitely agree- I loathe all the emotion and I cannot stand feeling this vulnerable
click to expand



Libra Sun, Aquarius Moon, Aquarius Mars. I can not stand nor tolerate Cancer men. I usually dismiss those sappy momma boys within the third date.
Posted by Librawoman77
Posted by FutureSeeker
Posted by aquarius09
Posted by FutureSeeker
The minute I was able to figure out how to free myself from my toxic ex- I detached emotionally faster than I could blink.
We became strangers. My life had two parts- then and now.

I've dated, I've liked men, I've cared for a few deeply, but none have hit me as deep as I feel with my Cancer man. I've always felt suffocated in a relationship. Always been afraid of committing, that somehow it will "clip my wings" and I won't be able to be my "butterfly" self. With my Cancer man, my heart feels so full of love. I actually feel clingy. I actually miss him. Me, the woman who didn't miss anyone when she was deployed, misses her man during the work day. I miss his presence. I feel solid with him. I feel so fixated on him. I love him, and I would do anything to make him smile. He has brought a special sunshine to my life when it has been raining for so so long. That's just how I know.

Stupid cancer men and their knack of bringing a freedom oriented, unemotional and commitment phobe Aqua to her knees. I stay away from them. I don't like emotions because they make me feel weak and out of control. No Bueno! Cancies can do that to an Aqua and I just don't like that effect.

Oh- I definitely agree- I loathe all the emotion and I cannot stand feeling this vulnerable



Libra Sun, Aquarius Moon, Aquarius Mars. I can not stand nor tolerate Cancer men. I usually dismiss those sappy momma boys within the third date.
click to expand

But in all fairness my 7th house - in sag so that explains alot. 7th House in Sagittarius
You want a partner who has their own life and won’t try to tie you down or hold you back from anything. Commitment is a hard thing for you in your early years, and you won’t settle down until you feel you’re truly ready, which will likely be later in life. In a relationship, you need space to do your own thing, and will run if your partner starts to get clingy