when an aquarius sees an ex.....??

This topic was created in the Aquarius forum by stormywinds789 on Saturday, January 24, 2009 and has 27 replies.
wow it seems like everyone on this board are having major problems with aquarius men! Sad ok i have a wedding to go to in a month and my aqua ex will be there yikes!...i was only with him for 6 months but he hurt me pretty bad when he vanished on me and never came back to me...i havent seen or heard from him in 5 months and i wondering when an aqua guy sees his ex, how does he act? will they ignore you, will they say hi to you, will they rekindle old feelings? i plan on looking super hot that day lolol...what exactly happens? do they ever get back with an ex? or do they remain friends?? sorry for asking so many questions, i just want to know! and im nervous lol
Was this relationship defined or undefined? Are you hot? Do you still have feelings for him? Do you really want to rekindle something with someone who has "broken your heart" by just disappearing with no explanation? Is he seeing someone else? Are you even sure he will attend the wedding? Would you be able to be just friends with him if he was to be friendly towards you?
Im sorry, I too have sooooo many questions? eeek!
LOL ok it was a defined relationship...i dont mean to be conceited but yes ive been told by a lot of people that im a very attractive woman...im 25...i was really attached to him and started to really like him and i thought he liked me too...i really thought that there was a connection..honestly i dont know what went wrong lol...i would rekindle something with someone if they apologize to me and realize that they lost something good...then i would give him another chance...i do believe that a guy deserves a second chance if they realized that they messed up..from what i know, i dont think hes seeing anyone because i do check his facebook page from time to time (no im not a stalker) to see what hes been up to and it says that hes still single plus we have mutual friends and i havent heard anything about him dating anyone...yes i will be attending this wedding...shes a good friend of mine...i dont think i can be just friends with him yet because i still have feelings for him Sad...but if hes friendly to me at the wedding then ill be friendly right back to him since im a nice girl..thats why im so nervous...i dont know what to say to him...ok now can u please answer my questions?? lol smile
My style is a bit harsh and to the point. Perhaps you can wait for krysrenee for more details.
He'll be friendly, its not like he can really avoid you in such a confined space. We do like to stay friends with our ex's. We honestly dont really like people angry with us. He'll probably act like nothing happened and everything is fine.
This will probably leave you confused and hopeful with no real closure and such. Depending on the circumstances of his leaving, which I guess only he knows at this point, will determine whether or not he will be willing to get back together with you. Its also up to you; do you really want to get back with him and condone this type of behavior.
(Putting my "I know everything" jacket on) Winking
Seriously, if we're talking about 2 mature adults (regardless of the sign) then the 2 of you should do just fine seeing eachother. You guys will be attenting a wedding separately, & the good thing is that the focus won't be on just the 2 of you. I could see if you guys ended up going to the same club, bar or friend's house where the chances of contact would be a lot higher & more likely to happen. But when you to this wedding, say your "HI's" & Byes" & go on about your business. If this guy is a mature adult, he'll speak & keep it moving & shouldn't even get the chance to rekindle any kinds of emotions in you. One, there will be others there, & depending on what he's told others about his relationship with you, he might purposely try to keep the contact with you to a mimimum. And two, if this guy really wanted to rekindle something with you, he wouldn't do it in front of alot of others. Remember, Aquas cry in the dark AND rekindle in the dark. This guy will either call you BEFORE the wedding or after, but don't expect to feel "sparks" from him during the wedding when they'll be 100 nosy people watching his every move with you.
There's 2 types of Aquas when it comes to the "breakup."
1. If you & him left off on a BAD note, he wouldn't plan on speaking to you again. That would be HIS punishment to you for making his life hell or more complicated than it should've been during the breakup. If the relationship ended on bad blood, Aquas will completely detach from that person & make it a point to show that person that they're made of hard stone & cannot be tricked or wheeled back in. They will merely act like you don't exist. And if they speak to you it's b/c you spoke to them first. he will cut off 100% communication with you & will make it very clear with his words & with his actions that you are no longer a priority or option for him. To the woman, his actions & coldness will seem unreal but in HIS mind, he has to do this to you in order to move on. Aquas love just as hard as everyone else. BUT just like Aquas fear to be hurt, they also fear being the "vulnerable" & desperate person in the end who is so hurt, they can't even function properly (mentally with other new prospects). In his mind, if he sees you at the wedding, he'll secretely want you to lust over him but not b/c he wants you to want him again, but b/c it'll make him feel that he's atleast not the weaker one (emotional wise) between the 2 of you. Now I said all of this with the assumption that this is happening b/c the break up was very rocky
Now on the other hand, if your breakup with your Aqua was mutual & ended on "let's just be friends" terms, then he will be completely different. He will still communicate with you every once in a while, he will still be openly nice to you when by himself with you or when he's around others with you, b/c after all, it's not like you personally betrayed him. Even though he'll still be communicating with you on a "friend" level, he expects for you to know that he's already emotionally detached from you or any possibility of entering into "another chance" commitment with you. He will still talk to you every now & then b/c he has become content in his decision to let you go.
1. He could've let you go b/c he saw some flaws in you (things that he considers FLAWS, even though you may not) & decided not to lower his standards, not even for the person he already cares for.
2. He might've let you go b/c he could sense that you were getting too emotionally clingy for his liking & decided that he'd be doing you a favor by "dropping out" instead of watching you fall so head over heels for him when in his mind, you're still on level one with him (emotionally & physically).
3. He might still be emotionally unavailable from another woman from his past. He probably doesn't talk to this woman anymore, but he's still not selfish enough to let a woman fall for him if he already knows deep down that the chances of him falling for someone new are very slim to none. He got with you b/c he thought you would help him move on, but once he realized that things weren't that simple, he thought he'd do you a favor & let you go before those 6 months turned into 6 years.
There could be 1 million reasons for why the relationship didn't work out. But either way, you should be able to know if your Aqua despises you or just simply doesn't want you as his partner but at the same time wants you as his friend. One thing to know is that your Aqua will never "pretend" when it comes to his emotions. If he hasn't spoken to you in 5 months it's b/c the craving to hear your voice for all of those months wasn't there. And even if he knew how you still felt about him, nothing would change his mind. I hope things work out for you in the future with other men though. Good luck!
so wait stormy if you know how he'll react, then what?
following on M's million question Winking have you been waiting for him or dating others? I ask because if you've moved on, you really won't care how the hell he reacts, right? do you realise your readiness to offer him a second chance will mean he can pull that crap again whenever he wants, right? are you ready for that? cos if he really wanted you back, the wedding is not a catalyst... you're on facebook, he could make a move to you right? why wait till wedding?
are you sure he wasn't dating someone else when you two were dating? or he wasn't emotionally tied somewhere else? as you thought things were going fine from your end, but he obviously had other agenda... that's another common theme from male aquas I know.
where's tiki? Sad she always gives more unbiased stuff
zenal yes ive been dating others but its def a rebound relationship bc all i can think about is my aqua ex...i understand that he can pull the same crap on me but he can change right?? i know that aquarius people like a change and they r constantly changing their ways...no im not 100% sure if he dated anyone else after me but like i said i havent heard anything from any of my friends that he has and i noticed on facebook that hes still single..
ok wheres tiki?? or does anyone else have anything to say about this?? the more the merrier! lol
It's so hard to tell with these guys, they're confusing and annoying and need to be babysat constantly, major attention whores....yes he is prob going to act very nice to you, like nothing even happend does but don't be mistaken he prob just wants to make sure you are not mad at him. I have found that it absolutely kills them if they know you're angry with them. they can't live with guilt( and no not because they care so much about you, it's mainly because they have this need to be loved and liked) and as soon as they find out you've actually forgiven or what have you they either go away or expect you to fall head over heels for them and no not because they want you back, it's only to reaffirm their greatness. i have found aqua men, they ones i have known, to be very selfish and exhausting. i know it's difficult we've all been there but someone who just left with no explenation does not deserve so much of your attention. you prob only care because it's mysterious and because you just couldnt have him. find the courage to move on , trust me they're just not worth it, in fact nobody who pulls shit like that is worth it. imagine if he decided to leave when you have a life and a family with him.
go to your party , have fun, don't look at him, if he came over be nice but don't pay too much attention to him. have a great time and it will kill him to see you don't care which will probably make him wanna figure out why you dont care anymore for god's gift to women. and then you'd get a message or email or a call but ignore it, it's a vicious cycle. as soon as you pay attention he'll pull away again. listen to me i know from experience.
zenal yes ive been dating others but its def a rebound relationship bc all i can think about is my aqua ex
understandably because there was no closure emotionally. This is BAD but no different from someone verbally saying it. It wasn't said does not mean it has to be excused. Actions speak louder than words.
Air signs guys are not know for appropriately dealing with emotional situations... hell most guys are not.
you prob only care because it's mysterious and because you just couldnt have him bingo...
You dated him for 6 months only, is he worth hanging onto and missing opportunities? If you hang on enough to memories, they'll only grow into something that's bigger than reality, right?
What if you were his rebound the way the new guys are you rebound? apologies if this hurts your feelings, but you're doing exactly the same.
You can choose your closure how you want because now you're letting him jerk you about.
Aqua guys are very shrewd or logical and you may have served a purpose... hell I'm not Aqua and I do this... I know the life of a relationship and have things mapped out but the other person doesn't necessarily... if the other person starts to invest more or fell more, is it my fault? smile ok yea it is Confused Tongue
Facebook means nothing - I've never changed my relationship status on fb, most of my friends don't.
Oh I work with Aqua guys that are married or dating but most people don't know they're so if you think it'll be announced, forget it.
Take care of your business, never mind his... don't forget to keep your life moving.
Well how Aquas respond to their Ex's have really nothing to do with the new person they are dating. If he felt it in his heart to ignore you for all this time, he'd still ignore you rather or not he had a new girlfriend or a girlfriend the whole time or not. And if he's at peace with how things ended between the 2 of you, he'll always be true to himself. If he wanted to speak to you & catch up with you, he'd do it regardless of whether or not he had a new girlfriend. He might still be single b/c Aquas know how to be alone. Yes, we love love just like everyone else but we also know how to let love find us. We don't necessarily skip from one person to the next b/c believe it or not, even though we can ignore someone & act like they don't exist doesn't mean that we didn't feel any pain or heartbreak when the break up happend.
And yes Aquas change, but just like with others, we change on our own time. Aquas are loyal to you b/c they want to be, not b/c their partners begged them to be. Aquas will still communicate with their ex's b/c they feel they can do so w/o still having mixed or stirred emotions, and not b/c they are trying to play mind games with you (someone they decided wasn't the one for them, thus how the other person feels no longer has any effect on his decisions.) If he speaks to you at this wedding it's not b/c his feelings towards you changed. It'd probably be more out of common courtesy & respect for the peace during the wedding.
If his feelings towards you changed, you'd know it b/c he would reach out to you personally when it's just you & him (E.I. call you up, write you a letter, email, face to face). If he was really content in his decision to cut off all communication with you then that means him seeing you out at a formal event won't make him go home & change his mind again. Sure, you might be looking good & sexy at the wedding, but Aquas are not that shallow. When they've chosen to break it off with someone (physically, emotionally), they rarely change their minds. And usually if an Aqua does flip flop & doesn't know whether or not he wants his ex back, those wishy washy emotions will show in his behavior. One minute he'll call you & try to wheel you back in & the next he'll be completely distant. But no this Aqua cut off communication with you period & hasn't "slipped up" emotionally to the point where he felt the need or urge to talk to or see you & that's an indication that he's completely moved on.
so what happend?
"wow it seems like everyone on this board are having major problems with aquarius men!"
Im having the OPPOSITE problem!! It?sa bit weird..he (aqua) has become possessive and is coming close to cutting himself off from his friends. I dont know why, maybe because i am pregnant or something, but we are now togehter everyday and he?s sooo attentive and cari?oso, and asking me why i think he loves me, etc. Sorry to gush, but its physical and emotional perfection smile

Im glad to hear Sola!
We need some aqua guy myths debunked.
hahaha - or just some successful stories at least...
Nah. They move on. It can seem harsh but at least they are doing you a favor by not giving any false hope that they may want you again. It's hard when your going though it to see that but it's so MUCH better than being jerked around. I like aquas.
yea S89, Star's right, they do not severe ties...
--- they keep it open like Libra... look again on these boards... push-pull that's why very direct independent minded women suit them... no time to decipher the head games.
No, If we DO NOT like you AT ALL ties will definitely be severed.
Oh man do I know all about this one...
I'm assuming you parted on good terms and the decision was atleast partially mutual - in that you didn't chase after him, you just let him go. (You haven't mentioned any harsh words or resentment.)
Most likely he will be quite friendly. He will definately talk to you: ask you how you've been, see what's new, make some other meaningless and awkward conversation & overall act like nothing ever happened between you two.
This will make you crazy. But please, don't let him see that. Don't give him the satisfaction, seriously.
No, If we DO NOT like you AT ALL ties will definitely be severed.
but if we don't like you 'a little bit', we'll keep you hanging till we find better? Tongue
sorry couldn't resist
We have our reasons. smile
Peoples perception of things just b/c you talk to them cordially after a breakup is not our fault.
Who knows...maybe most arent used to be treated or treating others civilized after a break up, so it leaves a few people confused in some cases causes them to hope and pine a bit.
just saying...

Sometimes people read too much into little/simple things.
"Thats wrong too, Aqua's supposely like honesty and all that..But they would not like it if it was done to them..And would have a problem with you should you do it.."

oh, I was just being tongue in cheek along with zen, but if there are reasons usually they aren't malicious. Most often then not it's a personal struggle.
lol yea I owe you one of these M Tongue
Aqua's supposely like honesty and all that
I have come to realise that 'honesty' is very different for everyone - there's just no one 'truth'

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