Why does it seem like...?

Other signs tread so lightly/walk on eggshells with us, when it's not the other way around??

Yes, we Aquas def. over-analyze a lot but I rarely see Aquas going crazy over people or feeling like we have to walk on eggshells or go through hell just to understand someone!

Even on these boards, I see it. These threads are like, "Omg help me understand my Aqua," or "Omg how do I get my Aqua's attention?" & I'm like whoa, why do people put us on pedestal's that we probably haven't even earned most of the time? Is it really that serious lol

It's like people have this natural patience with us that they wouldn't have for other signs. But the crazy thing is, we don't ask for it! If anything, we're more likely to hold the door open for you if you feel like running. I just don't get it

Why is this?

Is it b/c Aquas never go out of our way to gain approval, therefore making others naturally wanna tame, catch us or gain our approval??

Crazy thing is, I feel like if Aquas weren't so aloof, standoffish or hard to get, we wouldn't even be as intriguing or as worth going through the hell

I get that some people naturally gravitate towards something that seems challenging, but it's not like we Aquas go into situations like, "Ooh, I'm gonna be an aloof mystery today!" lol We're just being ourselves. We're not even trying to gain your approval, nor do we get any pleasure out of you walking on eggshells around us.

Aquas can be an energy drug for many people. Of course, you want to make sure that you don't piss off your energy supply...lol.

Posted by firewaterearthvenuspisces
Aquas can be an energy drug for many people. Of course, you want to make sure that you don't piss off your energy supply...lol.

Even though we may want to be caught, we sometimes come off like we don't want to be, which is why I think some people go the extra mile to gain our approval & tame us.

They use so much energy to have us that it seems they wouldn't use half that patience on others.

Then once they realize that what we're looking for is def. different BUT simple, they're like oh, that was all I had to do??!!! lol

I tell people all the time...don't try to appeal through your looks, money or status...just be able to have a conversation, have a sense of humor & appreciate the fact that we appreciate smart people & you'll have us in the palm of your hand! lol

We are not like the others so I wonder if people realize that in order to tame something different, it's going to take "DIFFERENT" to stand out. Just so happens that our "different" is simple

Do you really think people put Aquas on a pedastool?? Puh-lease.

I'm going to speak generally here, so no one take it personally.

The reason people have to work to understand you guys is because you guys ARE aloof. You guys ARE NOT going to be open with your thoughts and feelings. You guys are distant and disappear on people in a heart beat.

People sense the person underneath. People sense that you are loyal, but so many people give up on you guys because you're harder to get to know and mostly because you don't seem like you care. Note I said SEEM. You may care, but perhaps you should tell someone every now and then.

Yes, a lot of people write on here, "help me understand my aqua". Do you really think it's the other person's fault they don't understand you?

Then, they advice they get - "don't crowd them", "give them space", "don't tell him first you love him, you'll put him on the spot", "if he disappears, he will come back, he needs time to think", "if he disappears, he's not into you", etc, etc, etc. They are told to walk on egg shells, basically. This may all be true, but do you realize how confusing the actions are that pre-empt people to post the question?

However, you're right. People do try to continue to get to know yall. It is obvious you guys are good people. Your actions toward your family, animals, strangers is all showing that you are a quality person that is worth getting to know. You guys have a magnetism, a sense of adventure, little boyish/girlish charm and a charisma that draws people to you - it's like it guarantees that you're going to be fun to date and if you can get through to that inner being, one can experience a love and loyality like no other. That's the attraction.

I may or may not be qualified to make these statments, but I do know I have put some time into getting to know an aquaman and though it took a lot of patience to understand, and a little bit of frustration along the road, the journey so far has been well worth the ride.

I think just because someone wants to get to know you, get past all that phony exterior is a good thing that you shouldn't complain about (yes, the exterior shell is nothing like the person on the inside once you get to know them - as is the case with the human species). And, it does not mean they are putting you on a pedastool or walking on egg shells. It means they are interested in actually getting to know you.

I don't like the constant usage of "we"/"us". Like it's a fact that everyone in this forum feels the same way you do. Just wanted to point that out, because I find it kind of annoying.

I kind of relate to the aloof part, because every single person I know have pointed that out to me. It's not like I don't look for acceptance and it's not like I don't care. No, I'm not a sociopath. But maybe I just come off as cold to people because it's simply not in me to be that "showy" of my emotions. That's me and some will not like that, but some other people will or at least will not mind. So I'm pretty much cool with it.

I don't see people putting me on pedestals, though. People have to be patient with me, because I can be a pain in the ass sometimes.

I don't think it's accurate representation to be honest. As others have pointed out. There's a few share of threads on other boards, replace aqua with another sign and it's still pretty valid. I'll just chalk it up to relationship and dating issues.

I've met a fare share of people that couldn't give two shits what I think and they're not wrong. Could be a mixture of everything that ended up with astrologers giving us the whole cold and distant and stand-offish labels but it never seems to be the case when we have an internal discussions about emotions and such.

*fair

oh and I think truecap raises a good point. The Aquas I personally know are very charming and magnetic in a fun way and we expose very little of ourselves outside of the friend circle so that could be a possible explanation.

Posted by krysrenee7
Is it b/c Aquas never go out of our way to gain approval, therefore making others naturally wanna tame, catch us or gain our approval??

Crazy thing is, I feel like if Aquas weren't so aloof, standoffish or hard to get, we wouldn't even be as intriguing or as worth going through the hell

I get that some people naturally gravitate towards something that seems challenging, but it's not like we Aquas go into situations like, "Ooh, I'm gonna be an aloof mystery today!" lol We're just being ourselves. We're not even trying to gain your approval, nor do we get any pleasure out of you walking on eggshells around us.

+1. Everyone loves mystery. Aquas come across as an elusive enigma. My bro's cancer bf went crazy over me back when I was 17 and a tomboy. This cancer guy was popular and had pretty girls throwing themselves at him, but he chose me. It was the whole "why is this girl so aloof with me" sentiment that got him chasing.

Eventually the intrigue dies down and the person walks away tired trying to figure is out.

I totally agree with what Trucap said. People don't put us on a pedestal. They sense that what lies beneath the aloofness and distance is a nice and loyal person. They want that person to come out and show themselves, but it's so harddddd to get aquas to open up. Once they do, it's sweet as a candy, but most get tired of figuring out an aqua.

As long as you take your partner's feelings into consideration there is nothing wrong with any of it.
The partner needs to know and hear how you feel and they need to be reassured that when you need space it's not because they've done something wrong. Just be aware of your idiosyncracies and eccentricities and realize how that comes across to your partner. Of course, if you really care about them, it will be a natural thing to make sure they are secure. If you really don't care about them, then keep on keeping on. 🙂

I say that as an outsider looking in.

Posted by truecap
I think just because someone wants to get to know you, get past all that phony exterior is a good thing that you shouldn't complain about (yes, the exterior shell is nothing like the person on the inside once you get to know them - as is the case with the human species). And, it does not mean they are putting you on a pedastool or walking on egg shells. It means they are interested in actually getting to know you.

I'm not annoyed that people put in the work. I'm also aware that we Aquas can def. be hard work to specific people/signs. My question was why does it seem like Aquas get more of a free pass when it comes to testing patience?

I've never been annoyed or complained b/c someone was putting in the work to try getting to know me. My curiousness is about why someone who can like 2 different signs at the same level will most likely usually have more patience with an Aquarius moreso than the other sign? Calm down people lol That was all I was trying to say

I agree with @Fela

Perception is everything. We live in a society where people are now suddenly offended when they can't have all of you up front. I won't knock you if you want to give me your all or tell me everything in the beginning. Cool. But don't knock me b/c I chose to do business a little differently

If I don't give you my heart, soul & emotions up front, there is nothing wrong with that. All you need to know is that IF I feel it's worth it & when I'm good & damn ready, I WILL give you my heart, soul & emotions. Sorry, if you're offended that you don't get it when YOU want it. Aquas don't love from your point of view & based on YOUR timeline. We love & give based on what/how WE see fit. And the problem with that is....?

What 1 may consider aloofness, another person might consider understandable caution. What 1 may consider overly-sensitive, one might consider greatness for being so in tune with their feelings (which no longer sounds like a bad thing, right?)

How you perceive an Aquarius' actions has a lot to do with how YOU perceive things, & is not necessarily reflective of how the Aqua really is. I'm not saying that you shouldn't trust the vibes you're getting. Just saying that you have to also be just as open to knowing that a lot of what you're guessing about Aqua's are just "guesses" & that you could be wrong

And yes I say "Pedestal" b/c any time you allow 1 person to get away with things that you normally wouldn't have allowed others to do, that means you are somewhat putting that person in a separate category, giving them special treatment or i.e. putting them on a pedestal. Doesn't mean they'll stay up there. Doesn't mean that you even realize you just put them on a pedestal. Lol let's not play semantics people

But it is semantics. The 'we' part just isn't accurate is what some of us are trying to get at. I've not witnessed this free pass in my personal life as an aqua.

Again replace Aqua with another sign given any relationship thread it is still valid. If anything I'd say pisces takes the cake on the amount of "help me understand" threads. When people face certain expectations and it doesn't match reality they are going to ask, this isn't an Aquarius problem.

e.g.

"We love & give based on what/how WE see fit. And the problem with that is....?"

I'm definitely take into consideration the other person's feelings. You can consider perhaps I'm walking on eggshells with them because I'm interested in them and I want to know more about them and understand them. Role reversal.

So if someone is interested in an Aqua and thinks the same, is it still a universal problem that only Aquas face.

Posted by feby16aqua
Honestly I'm getting pretty tired of people saying how cold and aloof we are. CAN SOMEONE HELP ME NOT TO FEEL EVERY GODDAMN THING??
I WISH I didn't feel. I WISH I didn't have people continually in my life who hurt me and abuse my kindness and walk all over my tolerance and generosity.

I don't vomit emotions and my heart all over everyone I meet, but with the few people that I let into my heart. Those are people who can hurt me the most. It's not about being cold, it's about being protective and selective. But when your selector is all fucked, then...welll...lol.

Agreed. This is why most of us do what we do when we're being aloof... The moment you let people in they can hurt you, and they often do. So we don't show a lot of emotion bcz if we did, we'd be stuck in our emotions all the time. We care, a lot! And we can't let others do that to our rational minds... It feels wrong when I can't rationalize anymore, if I can't do that anymore... The world makes no sense, even less than before.

All the Aquas I know thrive on messing with other people's emotions in some form. Some as experiments to see what will happen, others for intellectual stimulation and still other aquas use peoples' emotions as the tools to get what they want.

I think the putting of Aquas on a pedestal is a misinterpretation. More like handling them with kit gloves. Be very careful this thing will lash out at you if your not super careful.

Posted by miamivirgo
All the Aquas I know thrive on messing with other people's emotions in some form. Some as experiments to see what will happen, others for intellectual stimulation and still other aquas use peoples' emotions as the tools to get what they want.

I think the putting of Aquas on a pedestal is a misinterpretation. More like handling them with kit gloves. Be very careful this thing will lash out at you if your not super careful.

Ok. Have to admit... I do like to see what happens sometimes, but I make sure to not hurt anyone.

Posted by Helena88

Posted by miamivirgo
All the Aquas I know thrive on messing with other people's emotions in some form. Some as experiments to see what will happen, others for intellectual stimulation and still other aquas use peoples' emotions as the tools to get what they want.

I think the putting of Aquas on a pedestal is a misinterpretation. More like handling them with kit gloves. Be very careful this thing will lash out at you if your not super careful.

Ok. Have to admit... I do like to see what happens sometimes, but I make sure to not hurt anyone.

click to expand

Well sometimes people don't show you the hurt or they fear you can hurt them in the future. Just because you feed your lab rats well doesn't mean they don't know what your up too.

I never said that Aquarians were the only species on earth that encountered this scenario. My point was that as an Aquarius, I've noticed that others can sometimes be this way with me as I see they are always going the extra mile with other Aquas too. So I was wondering what the reason was...that is all...

I'm not saying that Aquas are this superior being that deserves to be on a pedestal. I'm not saying that only Aquas encounter this.

It just seems that even though Aquas don't really ask for patience, understanding, etc. it seems we're automatically given it. That's not a complaint. I'm just wondering why. If the answer is that others do it b/c they must really like us, fine I'll take that answer. It was just a question. That is all. Calm down