Aries Children

I was reading in a book last night that Aries children are often praised for being themselves for the cute, adult-like things they do. They are encouraged as children to be independent and praised for their thought processess.

At the same time, though, if the parent doesn't reign them in somewhat and teach them to restrain their impulses and attitude, then they can often grow up to be "bratty" and "spoiled" and "entitled" adults.

They get confused because they are appreciated for these traits as children, but as adults they are not as accepted by society. This book said, that if Aries children are not taught the ways of society, they become out of control as young adults and basically A-holes as older adults. Parents are left wondering, "but they were such a cute, promising, ambitious child....why are they on drugs/in jail/unemployeed/etc. now".

I have an Aries male teenager. I am trying to teach him that he can not just state his opinion as bluntly as he sees it, because he can not treat people that way. I am telling him his thoughts are his, but how he presents his thoughts to others needs to be considered because he is beginning to come across as rude.

This book said, if you don't teach them young to conform with society's expectations of acceptable behavior, that they will have problems as adults fitting into functioning roles in society.

Any thoughts on the matter? Agree? Disagree?

Any ideas on how to reach the boy? He tends to be condescending, rude and blunt, doesn't appreciate what he has, has this sense of entitlement (I know all teens have that), looks down on our family because what we have isn't up to his standards (like my new car isn't a BMW so he's constantly downgrading it), etc. We're not poor, we have a nice house, decent cars, food on the table, nice clothes, extra money to play with, but it feels that he thinks it's not good enough.

I applaud that he wants more out of life, but he's acting like such a little peckerwood. What I provide isn't up to his standards. Well, dude. It could be worse. He just doesn't get that. His car is nicer than 75% in the school parking lot, but because one or two people have something nicer, he appears to not be happy. He should be happy he has a nice car!!

I didn't mean this to bash the boy, all teenagers are probably this way. But I basically wondered if any of you would agree to this book. And, if it is on the mark, I'm afraid I am starting out a little late teaching him wh

what behavior and attitudes are accepted by society. I don't want to do him a disservice.

What's the title of the book, Truecap? I have an Aries child, he'll be 4 in April. He is a very sweet child...for now. But I'd still like to read up on them.

Plus I think it's an Aries thing to desire bigger & better. My son is still young but he already is very competitive, he cries when other children get bigger trophies than him at sport events. He loves sports & when he competes, he does it only for the "very big cup".. he doesn't always get it though & obsesses about the loss for a very long time. He has a scorpio moon too, btw. I'd love to learn how to teach him that winning isn't everything.

I think by you buying him a car, you only encouraged him. You saw his issue with entitlement, tried to reason to him, instead of being firm. You probably took the "What we have is good enough, we have clothes, food" reasonable stance, which he cannot respect because he shouldn't even have the nerve to complain about what he's given. He knows he can be as bratty as he wants, and you'll keep placate his behavior, which further encourages him.

If you do charity work, it would be nice to talk him alongside you, so he can actually witness for himself how poor some people are, and how hard it is to get by. He sounds like he was never exposed to this type of life, so he has no awareness about the reality around him.

You mentioned in a different thread, your ex husband kept living beyond his means. The Aries probably witnessed this behavior coming from an adult, so he thinks he can have the same mentality. What's his relationship with his Dad? Does he cater to the Aries or is he a firm figure?

Posted by WaterCup
What's the title of the book, Truecap? I have an Aries child, he'll be 4 in April. He is a very sweet child...for now. But I'd still like to read up on them.

I don't have it with me, I'll look tonight and post it.

Posted by Damnata
I think by you buying him a car, you only encouraged him. You saw his issue with entitlement, tried to reason to him, instead of being firm. You probably took the "What we have is good enough, we have clothes, food" reasonable stance, which he cannot respect because he shouldn't even have the nerve to complain about what he's given. He knows he can be as bratty as he wants, and you'll keep placate his behavior, which further encourages him.

If you do charity work, it would be nice to talk him alongside you, so he can actually witness for himself how poor some people are, and how hard it is to get by. He sounds like he was never exposed to this type of life, so he has no awareness about the reality around him.

You mentioned in a different thread, your ex husband kept living beyond his means. The Aries probably witnessed this behavior coming from an adult, so he thinks he can have the same mentality. What's his relationship with his Dad? Does he cater to the Aries or is he a firm figure?

We are divorced and we have had to downsize a lot already. You'd think that would teach him a little about living poorer. The car is my Expedition that I allow him to drive. I didn't buy him one. I had to get a car that would be good on gas mileage and I drive a long distance to work, so I allow him to drive my other vehicle.

He has a job. I think that has helped a lot.

As far as I know, his dad doesn't cater to him.

When I sold the house his dad and I built, he kept saying we had to get a house as nice or nicer than what we had. When we went house shopping, I purposely chose some crappy houses for him to see so when I did find one, he would realize what we could have gotten. I'm on a single income now and found something nice, but smaller, that I could afford. I believe in living beneath your means.

He's probably not adapting well to the decrease in income. Does he help you with some of the bills?

Your parenting style sounds exactly like my Virgo Dad. He is my friend first and foremost but he always insisted on living within your means, or bellow them, so you can have some money stocked away for emergiences. He started a college fund when I was born.

How old is he exactly? He seemes to go through the motions of being a teenager. It's good he has a job.

My son is 19 and also an Aries 03/23. He was such a cutie(still is)when little. Could play any sport and excel in it. The kid was roller blading at the age of 3. Had lots of friends. He was the smallest in his class but was sadly underestimated by this one kid at school when he punched his lights out. Aries are generally quiet but have an explosive temper when pushed to far. He was not a confrontational child, loved to paly and get along with everyone until provoked.

Got his license at the age of sixteen and bought his first car at sixteen(grandmother left him some money)a Honda (sporty kind)Aries males love fast, sporty cars. He use to laugh at my shitty car.

He is quiet and a late bloomer. Didn't have his first girlfriend till recently, beautiful young lady too. My ex husband would pressure him to sew his oats but I knew he was one of those kinds of people that knew what he wanted and was willing to wait for it.

I love my little Ram!

Hey truecap,

My moms got a divorce too... and it was shitty. She had to file for bankruptcy because my dad was in so much debt that she was not even aware of (him pisces -_-). Filing for bankruptcy was the only way to circumvent his debt problem. She had to lose the nice house we had in the brick wall gated community we lived in when I was a child with big ass swimming pool, garden, roof high ceiling entrance, 6 bedrooms, etc. We had to move in with my grandmother lol! But we finally got a new home in an even nicer neighborhood. She makes good money but I doubt she is as good with her money as you. She made it out alright so.. I'm sure you will too... If you haven't already.

As far as your kid... I'm not sure what the best thing to do would be. You want to help your kid and show that you love them but making them work and earn what they have helps them to appreciate what they have more I suppose. On one hand I can totally see spoiling any kid of any sign could be bad. My little brother is soooooo spoiled to the point of being unaware of how selfish he can be at times. I don't know if she is still paying for "everything" but at one point she would shell out her last dime on him... and it affected his demeanor despite being Aquarius(one of the least likely signs you would think having that effect on them). She has sorta pulled the reigns I think recently sooo he has become slightly more responsible for himself dunno how it would have been were he an Aries.

I have dated an Aries girl who despite not coming from a wealthy family (her family was in fact poor) she was very VERY VERY selfish. Her parents would take care of all of her screw ups. She maxes out her credit card... mommy who cleaned houses would pay it off for her... just for her to go and max it out AGAIN!! -_-

It's never too late to try and teach him. Children have a life of their own ultimately and you can never have control of his choices or how he chooses to think and see the world. The best thing you can do besides tough love is to just keep doing what your doing... be his example. One day it will pay off whether you believe it or not. I used to really dislike my mom when I was younger but now even though she can be a nag sometimes ^.^ I truly respect and love her more than ever!

Side note....they are blunt and won't really offer their opinions but when they do, they are usually spot on! Always take an Aries advice, if they care for you they wont steer you in the wrong direction. An Aries wont be your friend if they don't completely trust and respect you. They dont have to, they have an abundance of people who want to be in their presence. They are not manipulative or ego driven either. Not to mention an amazing sense of humor, the best out of all the fire signs, IMO.

Honestly, I would let him just figure it out for himself. If he has high standards for himself in terms of material wealth, whats wrong with that?

My son has a better car than me and I am damn proud he does, thats what its all about, for our kids to do better than we did.

Just let him know, he better get ready to work for all those nice things, cus it don't come cheap.

Haven't you come here asking about your son before?

Posted by champranger

Posted by truecap
I have an Aries male teenager. I am trying to teach him that he can not just state his opinion as bluntly as he sees it, because he can not treat people that way. I am telling him his thoughts are his, but how he presents his thoughts to others needs to be considered because he is beginning to come across as rude.

This cannot be taught. We are wired this way ... blunt and direct. It is only when he starts to lose people he care about due to his own harsh words/reactions, that is when it will truly sink in ...

click to expand

This is very true.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Haven't you come here asking about your son before?

Yes, that was a while ago. This time I'm asking about how to teach him about his attitude and how he comes across to others. It's hard being a single mom. I guess a lot of mom's wonder if what they're doing is good enough. I just wanted some input on how to raise such a strong personality so he can grow up with the right foundations to be successful in life - and social graces and attitude are a must.

When I read that book it made me wonder if I were teaching him the best way for his sign.

Every little bit of advice helps.

*shrugs*

Going to post this here, might be of help 🙂

The ARIES Child

"All I know is something comes at me , Like a Jack-in-lhe-box And I go up like a Sky Rocket"

While Papa is passing out the cigars, the crimson-faced little Aries baby will yell for attention in the bassinet. How dare you ignore him and talk to the nurse? Who's the boss around here anyway?

You won't any more than get him in the taxi on the way home before that question will be emphatically answered. Your Mars infant is the boss. Do you have any doubts? They'll fade away when he's old enough to sit in the high chair and bang his spoon on the tray if you leave him alone too long. He'll never tease you or be subtle about his preferred diet. There's not a subtle bone in his strong, active, broad-shouldered little body. The Aries tot will spit out his vegetables as if they were shot from a cannon, and rub the cereal bowl on his tiny, bald head to make it quite clear that this is definitely not the food baby likes. The girls will be as direct in their actions as the boys. Maybe more so, though you hardly expect such fierce determina?_tion from a soft, little miss. Did I say soft? April's metal is iron, and April's stone is the diamond, the hardest sub?_stance known to man.

He'll probably walk earlier than other babies, and cer?_tainly will talk earlier. He won't be easy to control. Say, "No, no," to an Aries toddler, and he'll shake his chubby little finger right back at you in defiance. Discipline should be started quite young. Be on guard against falls and injuries to the head or face. He's accident-prone, to put it mildly. Keep sharp knives out of reach, watch out for burns and scalds. If there's anything hot or forbidden around, you can just bet the Aries child will stick his curious fist in it impulsively. You think that will teach him a lesson? Not this youngster. He'll try to break his own record.

Teething time may be feverish and severe. Baby will come through the ordeal with little difficulty, but will you?

When he gets a little older, you may get the breath squeezed out of you with one of his loving bear hugs. Aries children are usually affectionately demonstrative, except for the few Mars youngsters whose early emotional experiences freeze their normally warm hearts. These are the sad, quieter little sheep. But their horns are just as dangerous.

Better not ask relatives to babysit without warning them.

If poor Aunt Maude bravely takes him while you have a brief vacation, things could become a little strained. She'll catch your Aries tot with his busy hand in the sugar bowl, and probably make the mistake of stamping her foot in displeasure. That will both surprise and outrage the little ram into stamping his own small foot, and bursting out with his first complete sentence, "Aunt 'Mod'-don't you tell me sumpin'." So quaint. Bet she won't "tell him some?_thing" again soon. (You might have to come home a little early. He broke his big toe when he stamped his foot.)

As he grows older and stronger, after having fought measles, mumps, chicken pox and scarlatina, and won hands down. (a battle with germs is no contest with the quickly recuperating Mars nature), your Aries child will begin to show a pattern of temper. You'll notice that he or she can be most unreasonable when thwarted, but the anger won't last long. After a periodic explosion, the Aries boy or girl will beam a large, bright and winning smile your way.

He'll share his toys with amazing generosity with you, his playmates, the mailman, the neighbor's bulldog and the alley cat. However, his generosity will end if one of them hurts his feelings or gets in the way of something he wants to do or somewhere he wants to go. Then look out for fireworks.

Aries boys and girls may fall into the early habit of neglecting homework, and using your more obedient little Capricorn, Cancer, Virgo or Pisces child as an example will hardly impress him. (I'm assuming you don't have more than one Aries offspring. The planets don't do that to parents very often.) Instead of shaming the Mars youngster into studying, challenge him. He'll lap up a challenge like that favorite stray alley cat of his laps up cream. Just tell him (or her) that he's probably just slow, or not as bright as the other students, inferior in some way, but you don't mind. You love him anyway. My God how the dust will fly off those schoolbooks, as he sets out to prove what a ridiculous theory that is. Someone who can top him? That will be the day-or night.

After you've watched the magic of such strategy at home, tip off his teacher. She'll get down on her knees and thank you. If she has more than one Aries student in her class, she may send you a five-pound box of candy. Actu?_ally, Mars youngsters can learn anything in nothing flat, never forget it, and breeze through their studies, if they apply themselves.

Not all parents know how to accomplish this. They may spend years wondering why Mike and Maggie test with such a high I.Q., and still manage to stay in the third grade for four years. They needn't worry too much, however, because little Mike and Maggie will make up for lost time with the speed of a bullet, once they get out in the world and find out people are smarter than they are. A couple of humiliations to the Mars ego, and they'll cram so fiercely, they'll skip a few grades.

Your April youngster will have a vivid imagination; he'll be as dreamy and sentimental as a storybook, but he'll know very well how to get his bread toasted at the same time. If there is such a contradictory thing as a hard, prac?_tical idealistic dreamer, it's your Aries child. He's as naive as he is tough; as gentle as he is pushy. All these conflicting traits are woven into his fiery little nature. You'll marvel at it and wonder about it. So will your friends later on, not to mention his boss, his future enemies and the unsus?_pecting soul he marries.

Aries children will take the lead with playmates, start new games and invent new ideas for the gang. They'll insist on having their own way or butt their heads against authority, so you'd better decide to set down some firm rules in the beginning. The Aries child who isn't trained to obey in his youth will be taught some crushing lessons in maturity. Remember that his heart is as soft as butter, and it hides deep-seated fears of being disliked and unloved, despite his brave front. Rejection of his bright dreams or dampening of his exciting enthusiasm will send him run?_ning home to you in tragic tears. Hold him very close when this happens. His heart will be broken. For all his rash domineering ways, the Aries idealism is sensitive and it bruises with the slightest bump. He'll be getting plenty of those bumps on his naive, hope-filled optimism during his lifetime, and he needs more protection against them than you might think.

He believes in fairy godmothers with magic wands, and giants who can topple over whole cities with one sweep of a powerful hand. Unfortunately, Aries children naively identify with these two omnipotent types. When they dis?_cover that there are giant killers out there in the brutal world and blunt realists, who can make those magic wands pathetically impotent, they'll take some hard tumbles. But they'll get back up, brush themselves off, and push forward again indefinitely.

They'll teach that dull, un?_imaginative old world a thing or two! There may be a few sears before it's over, but don't count your Mars child out of the fight, no matter how many times he's knocked down. Wait for him to holler "Uncle." You may have a long wait.

Hide birthday presents in a safe place. He'll be impa?_tient, and unwilling to wait for surprises. Don't destroy his faith in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny too soon. To first believe fiercely, and then leam not to believe, toughens his emotions. It's a necessary lesson. His allowance will burn a hole right through his pocket, but he'll cheerfully give you his last dime for the milkman. Your Aries daugh?_ter may pay the neighborhood bullies a nickel a day to stop stepping on ants. An Aries child handled harshly in the impressionable years can show a defensive cruel streak, but guided gently and wisely, he'll insist on his rights with less force, and show a gigantic generosity and sympathy for his fellow man. Don't give him orders, always ask him to do things with a cheerful smile, and he'll knock himself out to please you. Never destroy his confidence. It's as important to him as the air he breathes. He may run away from home; the Mars independence shows early, but he'll come back wiser. Teach him that it's unkind to dominate meeker youngsters. He truly does not want to be unkind.

Being around cold, negative people can wound him deeply, but nothing will ever break his spirit. (Remember the diamond.) He'll probably be wild about books and be an excellent reader, yet he may not be anxious to settle down to four years of college. Aries is too interested in getting into the action of chopping down all those chal?_lenging beanstalks. But don't give up too quickly. He can use the additional discipline of higher education to help his mind catch up with his flaming emotions and sudden, puzzling bursts of sharp intuition. The more he balks at the idea of a rigid scholastic schedule and prefers the freedom of trying out a few jobs, the more you can be sure he needs the schedule.

He'll have to leam responsibility, but you'll teach him this and other things faster through direct logic and honest affection. Both appeal to him. Parents and teachers should never forget that Aries children glow under praise and doggedly proceed to top their own efforts, but they sputter like firecrackers under attack and lose all incentive to try. Tell him what you like about him, and he'll do less that you don't like.

Aries youngsters live up to exactly what's expected of them, including those who hide their burning drive under a calmer personality. This child must always be kept busy, or hell wander into trouble. Idleness spells danger. He needs stacks of sleep to renew all that scattered, misplaced energy.

Hell love stories about brave, shining heroes who con?_quered new worlds. But he also believes in leprechauns and wishing wells, and he'll continue to believe in them long after you've bronzed those little Aries baby shoes and welcomed the first grandchild. If you lead your Mars child gently, with constant love, he'll grow up with the wonderful power to dream the impossible dream-and make it come true.

Yep. Thats my son, except he is good with money.

Thanks for posting that!

Haha damn that post makes my appreciation for Virgos grow 😄

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Haha damn that post makes my appreciation for Virgos grow 😄

Come to the ADKR side!

(we virgos have ocd)

This is interesting. I have an Aries female cousin who had always been bratty. Thankfully she is a smart girl who has applied herself, but she is still a brat. It is defiantly due in huge part to the way my aunt raised her, IMO. She is also an only child so this may also play a role.

My nephew is an Aries. At the age of 6 he is such an intelligent, funny, charismatic boy. I also think he could get into trouble with his characteristics but my brother is a great father and puts him in his place.

Oh, they have some kind of charm to keep themselves out of trouble!!!

When my son was nine, I got home from work and he hugged me and said "mommy, you've worked so hard today, you shouldn't have to cook. Lets just order pizza so you can take the night off".

At first, I thought, so sweet! Then, after I called in the order, I realized, he figured out a way into charming me to get what he wanted for supper, pizza. Lil stinker!!!

Truly want to get to this when I get the chance & it will be soon 😉

Possibly.

The older he gets, he thinks he can say what he wants to people without realizing how harsh or bratty he sounds. He wants to throw his little temper fits and say mean things, but he doesn't realize how this makes others feel. He needs to learn he can't act like that and expect people to want to do things for him. He doesn't think twice about hurting someone's feelings because he thinks "he speaks the truth" when, in fact, he doesn't have enough life experience to even know he's right. He only sees things from his perspective and, true to his age, he doesn't realize all the other factors that come into play. Plus, when he gets in the real world, I don't want him to run around alienating people like my dad does. The world just doesn't work that way.

One good quality, is after his little hurtful monologues, he will re-think and is good about coming back and apologizing and explaining his reaction in a more rational way. I think he is on the road to learning, but he needs to think before he speaks and I don't even know if that is possible for an aries.