Compassion for the weak
This topic was created in the Aries forum by loner on Saturday, September 8, 2012 and has 22 replies.
Do Aries tend to have a lot of compassion towards the weak? Like when people depend on us for strength and assistance.
I just don't seem to have it in me to ignore and reject those who are in need and flee the scene without at least asking them what's wrong
Especially if they don't have anybody else to turn to.
Any other Aries feel the same way? Do you find that your nurturing side comes out in situations like these?....or not really? lol
I just don't seem to have it in me to ignore and reject those who are in need and flee the scene without at least asking them what's wrong
Especially if they don't have anybody else to turn to.
Any other Aries feel the same way? Do you find that your nurturing side comes out in situations like these?....or not really? lol
Posted by loner
Do Aries tend to have a lot of compassion towards the weak? Like when people depend on us for strength and assistance.
I just don't seem to have it in me to ignore and reject those who are in need and flee the scene without at least asking them what's wrong
Especially if they don't have anybody else to turn to.
Any other Aries feel the same way? Do you find that your nurturing side comes out in situations like these?....or not really? lol
Yep. Definitely.
Posted by DazedScorp
Maybe their controlling nature leads them to the weak, because they can do just that... Control them.
I'm led to the weak out of compassion and empathy. It also makes me feel good to know I can help someone. It has nothing to do with control. If they don't want my help, I leave them alone.
i think when *we*(aries) help people it's usually 50% genuine compassion, 25% our desire to be right in the middle of some type of ACTION (or we may just be out for blood if there's injustice or violence involved cuz we hate that sh $ t. or us just being natural born fighters looking for any excuse to fight) and 25% pure impulse (we can't control it lol)
we might also be suffering from this lol:
Hero Complex
The Hero Complex is a compulsion to help others and make the world right. Although not officially considered a disorder or disease, there is an increasing number of people who 'suffer' from it. Many fictitious heroes and main characters seem to have this as well, but note that there is a difference between helping others out of choice and feeling compelled to. It may also be associated with Zoological Altruism- Instinctive cooperative behavior that is detrimental to the individual but contributes to the survival of close relatives, thus making it more likely to be passed on.
Traits
Those who have a "Hero Complex" tend to feel that the current life they live is insufficient. For most, the need will ebb and flow. There will be days where they will ask questions like why they have had the role thrust upon them, if what they're doing is really going to make a difference, and sometimes even why they care in the first place.
Many believe that they could do more if they had the means to, whether it is in terms of money, power, or something else held in prestige. Most wait quietly believing that someday they will find these means, although some go out to "find" them on their own. They also often ask the question 'is this really enough?' or 'am I doing the right thing?' Usually such questions have a demoralizing effect, but many who have the Hero Complex will be motivated to find these answers. They are very loyal and dependable, and when given a challenge will almost always find a way to complete it...if they see it as a useful challenge. These traits make them great leaders and friends, for their extensive thought process makes them great at giving advice and opinions in addition to lending their abilities and talents when they can. However, the universal respect societies have for such people leads many to ignore the negative implications. Their high standards might not only carry the risk of overextending themselves and causing depression and withdrawal, they might lead the individual to become destructive (see "Villain-Complex" below).
In fulfilling these desires, they will take on a more benevolent behavior, and 'unlock' the true meanings of themselves. This is the true need of those who have a Hero Complex. Excellent examples of this are David Dunn of Unbreakable, Harry Potter, Goku from Dragon Ball Z, and Batman.
Hero Complex
The Hero Complex is a compulsion to help others and make the world right. Although not officially considered a disorder or disease, there is an increasing number of people who 'suffer' from it. Many fictitious heroes and main characters seem to have this as well, but note that there is a difference between helping others out of choice and feeling compelled to. It may also be associated with Zoological Altruism- Instinctive cooperative behavior that is detrimental to the individual but contributes to the survival of close relatives, thus making it more likely to be passed on.
Traits
Those who have a "Hero Complex" tend to feel that the current life they live is insufficient. For most, the need will ebb and flow. There will be days where they will ask questions like why they have had the role thrust upon them, if what they're doing is really going to make a difference, and sometimes even why they care in the first place.
Many believe that they could do more if they had the means to, whether it is in terms of money, power, or something else held in prestige. Most wait quietly believing that someday they will find these means, although some go out to "find" them on their own. They also often ask the question 'is this really enough?' or 'am I doing the right thing?' Usually such questions have a demoralizing effect, but many who have the Hero Complex will be motivated to find these answers. They are very loyal and dependable, and when given a challenge will almost always find a way to complete it...if they see it as a useful challenge. These traits make them great leaders and friends, for their extensive thought process makes them great at giving advice and opinions in addition to lending their abilities and talents when they can. However, the universal respect societies have for such people leads many to ignore the negative implications. Their high standards might not only carry the risk of overextending themselves and causing depression and withdrawal, they might lead the individual to become destructive (see "Villain-Complex" below).
In fulfilling these desires, they will take on a more benevolent behavior, and 'unlock' the true meanings of themselves. This is the true need of those who have a Hero Complex. Excellent examples of this are David Dunn of Unbreakable, Harry Potter, Goku from Dragon Ball Z, and Batman.
The person suffering from true Hero Complex will have hullicinations of saving the people they care about most. They have day dreams that include saving friends/family from fires, drowning, etc. They can also get a feeling inside of them like their stomach dropped ten feet. This usually occurs when they view someone in pain. Whether its a movie, video game, or real life, their Hero Complex can be triggered by someone elses misfortune. Crying is a big weakness for those with Hero Complex. Even if the person in need is an enemy, a Hero Complex will try to help. As stated above, this is not just having a "big heart" it is a compulsion to help others. If they dont they feel horrid and think they arent good people.
Causes
While not everyone who has been disappointed at some point in their lives will develop a hero complex, almost everyone with one has been in some way or another. One cause may be trying to atone for a sense of worthlessness. This sense may be caused by underlying stress from the inability to complete certain everyday tasks. Alternatively, because of the lack of modern-day heroes, the sufferer may be trying to compensate for a loss of 'icons' in modern societies, and they look inward instead of outward for their own gratification. They may feel guilt for not helping others in the past, or they may have felt pain at a previous point in their lives and are motivated by fear of seeing that pain inflicted on others.
Coping
Although there is no "treatment", many look for ways to find release from their troubled worlds instead of having to confront it. Often, a release can be found in video games, because of their allowance for one to enact heroic roles, or in personifications of heroes (i.e. Movies and comics or role-playing). The effects are not permanent, but can lead to an addiction to false realities. Perhaps the best thing for "victims" to do is accept there are some things we cannot change and others just need time. At other times, the best thing to do is to try to make a change, as long as the goal is within reach.
Causes
While not everyone who has been disappointed at some point in their lives will develop a hero complex, almost everyone with one has been in some way or another. One cause may be trying to atone for a sense of worthlessness. This sense may be caused by underlying stress from the inability to complete certain everyday tasks. Alternatively, because of the lack of modern-day heroes, the sufferer may be trying to compensate for a loss of 'icons' in modern societies, and they look inward instead of outward for their own gratification. They may feel guilt for not helping others in the past, or they may have felt pain at a previous point in their lives and are motivated by fear of seeing that pain inflicted on others.
Coping
Although there is no "treatment", many look for ways to find release from their troubled worlds instead of having to confront it. Often, a release can be found in video games, because of their allowance for one to enact heroic roles, or in personifications of heroes (i.e. Movies and comics or role-playing). The effects are not permanent, but can lead to an addiction to false realities. Perhaps the best thing for "victims" to do is accept there are some things we cannot change and others just need time. At other times, the best thing to do is to try to make a change, as long as the goal is within reach.
Villain Complex
A few of those who have the Hero Complex may begin to turn towards the 'dark side'. This can happen to those who either have an objective so narrow (acquiring power, defeating a nemesis) that they lose sight of everything else, or those who become so powerful they begin to use might alone to set things right. The need to help becomes the want to hurt. They often lose sight of those they are trying to help, who they might even come to despise as weak and deserving of punishment. They become intolerable of weakness and anything that deviates from their vision of a perfect world, and before long, they become the oppressors when all they wanted was to set things right. Some, like Anakin Skywalker, do not even realize they are hurting those they were trying to help and do not see the negative impact they are having.
If left in this thinking too long, they may become unrecoverable. (i.e. Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII and Dr. Doom of Fantastic Four.)
A few of those who have the Hero Complex may begin to turn towards the 'dark side'. This can happen to those who either have an objective so narrow (acquiring power, defeating a nemesis) that they lose sight of everything else, or those who become so powerful they begin to use might alone to set things right. The need to help becomes the want to hurt. They often lose sight of those they are trying to help, who they might even come to despise as weak and deserving of punishment. They become intolerable of weakness and anything that deviates from their vision of a perfect world, and before long, they become the oppressors when all they wanted was to set things right. Some, like Anakin Skywalker, do not even realize they are hurting those they were trying to help and do not see the negative impact they are having.
If left in this thinking too long, they may become unrecoverable. (i.e. Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII and Dr. Doom of Fantastic Four.)
Wow I've never heard of the hero complex! This is really interesting! This paragraph was frighteningly true for me....
------The person suffering from true Hero Complex will have hullicinations of saving the people they care about most. They have day dreams that include saving friends/family from fires, drowning, etc. They can also get a feeling inside of them like their stomach dropped ten feet. This usually occurs when they view someone in pain. Whether its a movie, video game, or real life, their Hero Complex can be triggered by someone elses misfortune. Crying is a big weakness for those with Hero Complex. Even if the person in need is an enemy, a Hero Complex will try to help. As stated above, this is not just having a "big heart" it is a compulsion to help others. If they dont they feel horrid and think they arent good people.-----------
When someone cries in front of me I feel soooooo bad and guilty even if the reason they're crying has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with me or my actions. I saw a man crying on the subway once and I gave him my favorite handkerchief to keep. I sat next to him in silence (he didn't look like he wanted to talk) I forgot to get off at the right station and was late for an important appointment...It was stupid on my part, I know.
------The person suffering from true Hero Complex will have hullicinations of saving the people they care about most. They have day dreams that include saving friends/family from fires, drowning, etc. They can also get a feeling inside of them like their stomach dropped ten feet. This usually occurs when they view someone in pain. Whether its a movie, video game, or real life, their Hero Complex can be triggered by someone elses misfortune. Crying is a big weakness for those with Hero Complex. Even if the person in need is an enemy, a Hero Complex will try to help. As stated above, this is not just having a "big heart" it is a compulsion to help others. If they dont they feel horrid and think they arent good people.-----------
When someone cries in front of me I feel soooooo bad and guilty even if the reason they're crying has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with me or my actions. I saw a man crying on the subway once and I gave him my favorite handkerchief to keep. I sat next to him in silence (he didn't look like he wanted to talk) I forgot to get off at the right station and was late for an important appointment...It was stupid on my part, I know.
Posted by Jesse91
i think when *we*(aries) help people it's usually 50% genuine compassion, 25% our desire to be right in the middle of some type of ACTION (or we may just be out for blood if there's injustice or violence involved cuz we hate that sh $ t. or us just being natural born fighters looking for any excuse to fight) and 25% pure impulse (we can't control it lol)
Yup. our impulsiveness definitely plays a huge role in this lol We don't think first. We just respond. But I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes the world needs people who are willing to dive in to a risky situation to save the day lol
i avoid them but if its unavoidable then i get in on it, if its someone i know ill definitely not let it go unintended
I am compassionate towards vulnurable people.
Posted by Jesse91
i think when *we*(aries) help people it's usually 50% genuine compassion, 25% our desire to be right in the middle of some type of ACTION (or we may just be out for blood if there's injustice or violence involved cuz we hate that sh $ t. or us just being natural born fighters looking for any excuse to fight) and 25% pure impulse (we can't control it lol)
i agree. even tho the sign of aries is not exactly angelic by nature we still hate seeing anybody being wronged.
if we're going by your formula my desire to help somebody is made up of 50% pure impulse, 30% looking for action and 20% compassion.
having a heart is considered weak where i'm from. growing up i was told that having a heart would just get in the way of survival.
----having a heart is considered weak where i'm from. growing up i was told that having a heart would just get in the way of survival.------
They told you that?
I think having a heart makes you a human...
They told you that?
I think having a heart makes you a human...
Don't listen to them, Dante
i have a theory. since aries are so tough and badass nearly 24/7 they can't stand it when they see a person that's refusing to fight for themselves so they think, "well if YOU won't fight for yourself i'll do it for you!" lol
aren't you guys generally turned off by passive, weak people? at least that's what i heard...
i could be wrong lol
aren't you guys generally turned off by passive, weak people? at least that's what i heard...
i could be wrong lol
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Yes and no.
If they seem like perfectly nice people who appear to need someone on their side, fine. I've met plenty who were total sweethearts and their personality just attracted assholes and they could use someone in their life who's on their side.
But if they're one of those types who are a total lost cause (read: issues and their problems will just suck the life out of you), fuck. That.
I've become a bit more selective as I've gotten older. I learned quickly that a lot of people who appear to need someone in their corner soon revealed why they were always in such a "needy" state. More like "user" status. Oh okay. Have a nice life, asshole. I'm gone.
If they seem like perfectly nice people who appear to need someone on their side, fine. I've met plenty who were total sweethearts and their personality just attracted assholes and they could use someone in their life who's on their side.
But if they're one of those types who are a total lost cause (read: issues and their problems will just suck the life out of you), fuck. That.
I've become a bit more selective as I've gotten older. I learned quickly that a lot of people who appear to need someone in their corner soon revealed why they were always in such a "needy" state. More like "user" status. Oh okay. Have a nice life, asshole. I'm gone.
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Also, might I add, on a more general level-
Emotionally weak people annoy me.
Women who stay in physically abusive relationships piss me off. What the hell? Get some damned common sense and LEAVE.
Yes, I know there's all sorts of complex bullshit involved, but the fact that these women can't even have the self respect to get their shit together and LEAVE, annoy me to no end. "Boo hoo, he abuses me!" but they do NOTHING to fix the problem. When the excuses come pouring out, pathetic ones at that (controlled by estrogen, btw), I just can't be bothered to give a fuck.
Compassion? Limited in these scenarios.
Emotionally weak people annoy me.
Women who stay in physically abusive relationships piss me off. What the hell? Get some damned common sense and LEAVE.
Yes, I know there's all sorts of complex bullshit involved, but the fact that these women can't even have the self respect to get their shit together and LEAVE, annoy me to no end. "Boo hoo, he abuses me!" but they do NOTHING to fix the problem. When the excuses come pouring out, pathetic ones at that (controlled by estrogen, btw), I just can't be bothered to give a fuck.
Compassion? Limited in these scenarios.
Posted by MelanieG
i have a theory. since aries are so tough and badass nearly 24/7 they can't stand it when they see a person that's refusing to fight for themselves so they think, "well if YOU won't fight for yourself i'll do it for you!" lol
aren't you guys generally turned off by passive, weak people? at least that's what i heard...
i could be wrong lol
Hmm...perhaps lol
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Yes and no.
If they seem like perfectly nice people who appear to need someone on their side, fine. I've met plenty who were total sweethearts and their personality just attracted assholes and they could use someone in their life who's on their side.
But if they're one of those types who are a total lost cause (read: issues and their problems will just suck the life out of you), fuck. That.
I've become a bit more selective as I've gotten older. I learned quickly that a lot of people who appear to need someone in their corner soon revealed why they were always in such a "needy" state. More like "user" status. Oh okay. Have a nice life, asshole. I'm gone.
lol Yeah I know what you mean. You can only help those who are willing to help themselves.
Posted by glassblowing
I bet dazedscorp is as dazed as he appears to be.........yeeeeeeaaaaah right! I hate scorpio men......always putting on a false front but a barrel full of liesssssss.......showed the last one the door
lol It's ok. Everyone is welcomed here. Maybe he had a bad experience with an Aries and the pain hasn't gone away yet...?
I can perhaps add something. I'm a scorpion with twin aries children a boy and a girl. I'm recently.. yeah right.. for the last couple years I've been involved in a grand chase of a taurus woman (without the use of my scorpion bag of tricks mind you) and have again and again run up against the unmovable will of the "bull". Irresistible force meets immovable object kinda thing. Anyway, as a scorpion I'm pretty good at the "cover up" when it comes to most people, however my children know me well enough to read me like an open book and they never miss a chance to pick me up when I've allowed myself to fall. I say that I allowed my own fall because truth be told, I've always been very good at the scorpio thing and if I truly wanted to own this woman I simply... would.... so here I sat, wondering if perhaps just being raised by a scorpion could have caused my kids' uncanny ability not only to see my pain, but to address it so effectively. I came across this post and suddenly I couldn't take credit for their reaction to my plight. I know now that ther are by their own nature, compassionate and for whatever reason, they do love to help you up, brush you off and send you forward with a renewed spirit. I thank god for my Aries kids and no doubt!! Keep it up!!
Aww your kids are awesome and as for this Taurus woman wow. Has she really grabbed your interest, because if you intend not to play games and marry her lol then I'd say use your Scorpion tricks. Anyways good luck and yeah we Tauruses are pretty
un-movable which is a trait that comes in handy sometimes.
I have no intention of ever letting her go, once I get her that is. We are and have been best friends for some time now as she's married. That's comming to an end though and we've discussed tackling life together and that's where it's headed. Could my bag of tricks speed things up? Oh yeah, sure they could. But I've no need of tricks. Simple, honestly, hard work and just genuine love for her has broken all the walls so far and shows no signs of failing me. I'll stick with what works, because I want it to last. I've too much invested that the payoff would only be cheapened if I force movement. When I think of us I think of the irresistible force (me)meeting the immovable object(her). Yes her "stubborn"(as we call it) can be handy but also "could" be trouble as well. I've learned to pick my battles and more importantly that whatever she's stuck on is really no issue anyway. If I take a breath and support the stubborn, whatever it is falls off pretty fast and is done with without a single shout fired!
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