does one need 2 be tuff to get respect from aries?
This topic was created in the Aries forum by MelanieG on Saturday, October 13, 2012 and has 9 replies.
i'm starting to notice a pattern with aries. they only respect tough people. sure, they have big hearts and will go out of their way to assist the weak and powerless but at the end of the day, they only seem to respect those who are...
a)just as tough as they are
or
b)tougher than they are
i've been acting like a complete doormat all this time. i didn't provide him with any exciting drama or challenges. i'm starting to feel like the main reason he picked aqua over me is because she is tough and i'm not. it's that simple. why didn't i see this sooner?
by "tough" I don't neccessarily mean physical toughness although it can be but more like mental and emotional toughness.
so tell me guys. when everything is said and done do you only respect tough people?? how can i show an aries that i can be tough?? i'm a leo-influenced libra. i know i have it in me to be tough. i have moments where i'm super tough in my daily life but when i'm dealing with the crush i turn into a scared little girl. i dunno why.
a)just as tough as they are
or
b)tougher than they are
i've been acting like a complete doormat all this time. i didn't provide him with any exciting drama or challenges. i'm starting to feel like the main reason he picked aqua over me is because she is tough and i'm not. it's that simple. why didn't i see this sooner?
by "tough" I don't neccessarily mean physical toughness although it can be but more like mental and emotional toughness.
so tell me guys. when everything is said and done do you only respect tough people?? how can i show an aries that i can be tough?? i'm a leo-influenced libra. i know i have it in me to be tough. i have moments where i'm super tough in my daily life but when i'm dealing with the crush i turn into a scared little girl. i dunno why.
I suppose this is true to a large extent. The way I tend to think about it though is that Failure isn't the problem, failure to try is.
Having said that, if you don't care, then you don't care, I am fine with that. Where I have the problem is when someone apparently really wants something, but doesn't put forth any effort to make that something become reality.
I will admit that I admire and respect "toughness." I can also deeply empathize with weakness and not being able to do whatever. To put it another way, it is the spirit that I appreciate, not just the ability.
Having said that, if you don't care, then you don't care, I am fine with that. Where I have the problem is when someone apparently really wants something, but doesn't put forth any effort to make that something become reality.
I will admit that I admire and respect "toughness." I can also deeply empathize with weakness and not being able to do whatever. To put it another way, it is the spirit that I appreciate, not just the ability.
i agree with dofacc. i definitely find myself gravitating toward those with tough spirits. i don't like passivity or people who rely too much on outside circumstances to make things happen, people who blame others for all their hardships etc. you can definitely train yourself to become tough by facing difficult situations head-on instead of running away or making excuses. that's always a good way to start. you said you were a door mat and i gotta say i've yet to come across a happy door mat. cuz door mats are usually people who see a problem but don't do a damn thing about it. they'd rather remain passive than take action cuz it's easier. being passive requires no effort. but you know they're unhappy cuz they're always crying or complaining.
i understand there are some situations in life where you just have to grin and bear it for the time being but even in those instances you can always shift your attitude to a more positive one or work toward a solution instead of staying stuck in that poor me mode. know what i mean?
people aren't born tough. they train themselves to become that way. so anybody can do it if they wanted to.
i understand there are some situations in life where you just have to grin and bear it for the time being but even in those instances you can always shift your attitude to a more positive one or work toward a solution instead of staying stuck in that poor me mode. know what i mean?
people aren't born tough. they train themselves to become that way. so anybody can do it if they wanted to.
Signed Up: Mar 30, 2012
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Agreed a bit.
I don't have much respect for doormats. Mostly because they go on about their woes, which are rooted in the fact that they let people walk all over them like that. It's a circular problem that can be solved by growing a pair and not allowing people walk all over you. It's hard to respect someone who can't stand up for themselves/defend themselves.
As for you, work on your insecurities and low self esteem. It's usually the root cause when one allows others to walk all over them and allow themselves to be pushed around. As for developing "toughness" stop worrying about what others think. If you're fed up with a circumstance or tired of how someone is treating you, DO SOMETHING.
As for crushes, it comes with your age. Get some confidence and try to keep it real when it comes to situations. No more fairytale outlooks on guys and relationships.
I don't have much respect for doormats. Mostly because they go on about their woes, which are rooted in the fact that they let people walk all over them like that. It's a circular problem that can be solved by growing a pair and not allowing people walk all over you. It's hard to respect someone who can't stand up for themselves/defend themselves.
As for you, work on your insecurities and low self esteem. It's usually the root cause when one allows others to walk all over them and allow themselves to be pushed around. As for developing "toughness" stop worrying about what others think. If you're fed up with a circumstance or tired of how someone is treating you, DO SOMETHING.
As for crushes, it comes with your age. Get some confidence and try to keep it real when it comes to situations. No more fairytale outlooks on guys and relationships.
It's not just aries. A lot of guys appreciate not necessarily toughness, but a women who knows what she wants and will stand up for herself and her beliefs. I've made mistakes in the past in letting guys "break" me and then wonder why I wasn't getting the results I wanted. Hate to say it, but most of these guys are boys on the inside. They don't want a women who's gonna get onto them every 5 secs, but they do want a women who will hold to what she says no to. So if you aren't okay with him getting into your nickers don't eventually say "well okay" after he's tried for so long, especially an aries. They like a challenge, and you're taking it away from them, as well as their respect for you, when you let them have their way so easily.
Honestly I'm not the most sound women, but I've found a man I can handle. Someone I can be honest with and tell no when I don't like something. And who I don't feel pressured to give what I don't feel should be given out. Also a true gentleman won't keep pestering you for something you don't want to do.
Guard your heart and good luck with your next man.
Honestly I'm not the most sound women, but I've found a man I can handle. Someone I can be honest with and tell no when I don't like something. And who I don't feel pressured to give what I don't feel should be given out. Also a true gentleman won't keep pestering you for something you don't want to do.
Guard your heart and good luck with your next man.
Astrologers are always saying that libras are the toughest, strongest when they are finally married.
the velvet gloves comes off. Once you find that special someone, and hopefully it is that Aries you're looking for, he'll be surprised that you are a hell-fire once married. And will be scratching his head wondering, wow, i thought she was sweet and soft? But hey i got two for the price of one! Sweet/soft and Hell-fire too.
Hope that helps
the velvet gloves comes off. Once you find that special someone, and hopefully it is that Aries you're looking for, he'll be surprised that you are a hell-fire once married. And will be scratching his head wondering, wow, i thought she was sweet and soft? But hey i got two for the price of one! Sweet/soft and Hell-fire too.
Hope that helps
generally speaking nobody really wants an overly delicate weak ass person who will cry or panic at the drop of a hat to be tagging alongside them like some sort of baggage. being tough also means you have self dicipline. i got so much respect for people with good self control and dicipline and i try my best everyday to emulate that.
thanks guys. your advice was helpful. now its time for me to actually implement all this lol
as for the crush, i think its time for me to let go of him. i need to accept that he's with someone else now. i have a stubborn taurus moon so once i get an idea in my head its hard for me to give it up without at least a fight...lol that's what was happening. when i spot something that looks safe and secure, i tend to stick to it like glue no matter what anyone says lol. in this case he was like my comfort blanket and i didn't wanna let it go. but i'm starting to see how unhealthy this all is. especially now that he has a girlfriend whom he seems to like a lot. and i don't have the right to disrupt whatever they have going on. i've woken up to reality and i'm finally ready to move on. i really mean it this time too.
as for the crush, i think its time for me to let go of him. i need to accept that he's with someone else now. i have a stubborn taurus moon so once i get an idea in my head its hard for me to give it up without at least a fight...lol that's what was happening. when i spot something that looks safe and secure, i tend to stick to it like glue no matter what anyone says lol. in this case he was like my comfort blanket and i didn't wanna let it go. but i'm starting to see how unhealthy this all is. especially now that he has a girlfriend whom he seems to like a lot. and i don't have the right to disrupt whatever they have going on. i've woken up to reality and i'm finally ready to move on. i really mean it this time too.
Don't worry Melanie. Nobody is tough all the time. As Aries, we definitely strive to be tough but we break down and cry sometimes too. What's important is to keep on going!
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