I don't even know where to begin if you say from the beginning well I don't think I know where that is? This Aries is driving this Cappy bonkers and he won't go away, what kind of game is he playing?
I met him on a dating site almost a year ago and we hit it off right away...I mean like a very passionate connection. He pursued me in the old-fashioned way..call, respond to calls, go for coffee and showed me around since I was new to the area. Then one day..out of the clear blue sky he texts that he loves me...I say ok then I love you too (I fancied him and I loved being with him is what I meant) but a text later he says i like you, i mean i like you so slow down. I'm like dude! you are the one texting me and blowing up my phone and using words I LOVE YOU...don't turn the tables and act like I'm the antsy one. He then begins to slow the texts down and not respond to calls so I said screw it and told him off via text and stopped contacting him. Of course that didn't last because then he would call or text out of the blue and say stuff like "sexy" or "i want you" or whatever a few days apart off and on....8 months later he is still doing this! we hooked up maybe 3 times and always had a great time together..I mean very steamy and connected and then the fool goes balistic again and tries to label me as clingy. Whaaat? Excuuuuse me? Me..a Capricorn woman...clingy? that is a curse word to this independent goat and obviously he doesn't have a clue what clingy means. I stay mad at him and tell him to stop calling and don't text me and he will get pissy and stop but 10 days later..."baby" or "sexy" or asking me to send him a pic. He says he wants to see me at least 3 times a week but never, ever makes a date. He asks me my schedule but never, ever capitalizes on it. One reason for that might be that I told him if planned on squeezing me into his otherwise busy schedule he doesn't need to bother making any dates with me.
I'm not a promiscuous woman and I don't like to "see" more than one guy at a time but I am sooooo confused and I am ready to venture out and I'm tired of turning down dates for mr "what's his problem?" The last text I sent him (which I fully expect him to get pissy about) was after he called me "sweety" and I texted (10 hours later) that I guess he intends on flirting with me until my womb dries up, then I called him a scared chicken!
What is the deal> I never dated an Aries and I'm thinking I'm missing something here. Help pleeeze!
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Apr 14, 2013Comments: 76 · Posts: 810 · Topics: 82
I don't think you're missing anything. It's sounds like you're his backup when he has nothing better on and a commitment phobic.
He probably thinks that by sweet talking and saying all the emotional bs he thinks girls wants to hear to emotionally connect with them and to soften them up ;-P and then once he manages to have sexual relations with you the cycle starts again. LOL
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May 02, 2012Comments: 11 · Posts: 1836 · Topics: 72
I'm confused about;
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say he never takes you on a date.
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say you are turning down dates for him.
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say you told him your womb is going to dry up and you called him a scared chicken.
I'm not confused about;
You gave it up too soon so he lost interest but it was probably good so he wants some more. It happens. I think you are clingly because you want more than he is willingly to give. It has nothing to do with the Zodiac or you being a Capricorn. It's called catching feelings. That's what happened. He is playing with you and you are letting him as a Capricorn this is not your game it is an Aries game so you cannot win. Heck you don't even know how to play it.
Find a Virgo and live happily ever after.
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Oct 02, 2012Comments: 2 · Posts: 2726 · Topics: 31
You skipped 5. And reading what happened with lildols ex he doesn't seem immature at all.. She just went overboard. He was constantly telling her to back off and she just kept riding him.. Telling him that she loved him.. He wasn't ready.. They were together for what 4 months.. I see nothing wrong with his behavior. Feby
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Oct 02, 2012Comments: 2 · Posts: 2726 · Topics: 31
Isn't febus dad an Aries? I'm pretty sure she said he was mature.
I don't think you're missing anything. It's sounds like you're his backup when he has nothing better on and a commitment phobic.
He probably thinks that by sweet talking and saying all the emotional bs he thinks girls wants to hear to emotionally connect with them and to soften them up ;-P and then once he manages to have sexual relations with you the cycle starts again. LOL
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Thanks for your response. If I'm his backup plan it is a pretty bad plan because I haven't physically seen him in months. We haven't been intimate in longer than that. This is why I want to know why he keeps contacting me. I can't be clingy because I never text, call or initiate. I answer a text hours later after he texts again shouting "he-llo" as if I didn't see the text. I just never know how to respond. If he is serious I would entertain him but to me, my thinking is why in the world would someone waste that kind of time? I suppose I'm the crazy one. I do think he is commitment phobic which I blatantly accused him of. I am not nice to him and I talk sharp to him and still he is there sending me hearts.
I love my cap lady friends but imo some (not all) can be a bit controlling even clingy and definitely dominant.
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Thanks for your response. I can be clingy if I feel insecure in a relationship...I mean a real give and take relationship. I am very dominant as everyday behavior but with someone I am interested in I am almost 100% submissive by default. In this situation I am very sure I am not or was not clingy.I haven't initiated a text message to this man in well over 5 months. I have known him since December. Once we had the clingy conversation I was insulted and went the opposite direction. If he doesn't call or text then he doesn't hear from me. That is not my idea of clingy on my part, at least not in this situation.
I'm confused about;
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say he never takes you on a date.
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say you are turning down dates for him.
You said you want him to leave you alone but then you say you told him your womb is going to dry up and you called him a scared chicken.
I'm not confused about;
You gave it up too soon so he lost interest but it was probably good so he wants some more. It happens. I think you are clingly because you want more than he is willingly to give. It has nothing to do with the Zodiac or you being a Capricorn. It's called catching feelings. That's what happened. He is playing with you and you are letting him as a Capricorn this is not your game it is an Aries game so you cannot win. Heck you don't even know how to play it.
Find a Virgo and live happily ever after.
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Thanks for your response and I'm sorry to confuse you. What I am basically saying is that I am interested enough to entertain something if he is interested but if he is not then he needs to go completely away and I will be ok with that too. I am not sprung on him, I just see so much potential that I am willing and I like him enough at this point to try something real. But we don't have to. So he either needs to stay or go away but the lines need to be clear.
I don't date because I'm still not clear about the Aries and I only date one at a time...serious or not serious. It's all I can handle on my plate.
I asked him what I asked him about my womb because he has no children an we discussed children early on. I have not been intimate with this man in months but during those months all he has been doing is flirting with no date plans that he blames on me an my work schedule. I said it to be mean...like I have been doing for the past few months...being mean so he will go away. I called him a coward because I was being mean and letting him know at the same time that I recognize his commitment phobia. I haven't heard a response so I know he is upset...which is what I was going for so he would bounce.
About me giving it up too early...I don't have those kinds of hangups on time and I don't know what the proper limits are anyway. I have been celibate for more that 8 years and not dating at all. he was my first interest and I for one wasn't going over in my mind how long I should make him wait.
and repeatedly reminds me of it and I don't know why. If he is so bored then he should stop contacting me is my reasoning, so I think it's more than that. I was hoping some Aries men could help me.
My brother is a Virgo and much too beta for my taste and I am just not that clean....so no thank you on the Virgos. I am attracted to the fires...usually leos though.
Most Capricorns I've met are the furthest thing from clingy. However, OP, you gave it up to him and his ego too soon here (or at least by his interpretation that you did):
Somehow I get the feeling that he is manipulating this case here for his ego.Anyway, OP, I think you should pull back much more (he technically asked for it). I think if he wants a date with you, he definitely would have arranged date, time and everything!
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Thanks for your response. I have several Cappy friends and my best friend is one also We make fun of clingy people And it's an insult to is to be called one. I can be clingy and when I am I am in a very insecure situation where my heart is deeply involved and I feel like I have much to lose. This is far from that.
He could be manipulating me for his ego like you said because he keeps mentioning my looks and my height to his friends and saying his friends want to meet me now that I think about it, in fact every time I've seen him (4 times) he called his friends up on the phone to come by and meet me and I am too shy for that.
We aren't intimate And I told him we were no longer going to be because I wanted to get to know him.
I never initiate contact but now I'm going to block his number which I hate to do because it's too rude. But he's too persistent and it confuses me.
Thanks everyone for responding. I didn't want to make a mistake and move forward if I was just pegging this guy wrong. He swears he likes my "crazy arse" and that he misses me and that he's attracted to my body also and won't make apologies for desiring me. I told him great but that's not enough And he said to let it develop. How can anything develop if all he talks about is my looks my body and my sex? Like I said he's working on pure memory because we haven't seen eachother or been intimate in months. I Mentioned that he was using me and he asked how when we don't have Sex. He messages me "sexy"
And I respond "go to hell"
Most Bizaar thing I ever experienced. Why does he get so angry when I accuse him?! I guess because he's guilty.
I got it Now. He needs to exit my life.
To be honest, I Thought he was interested but confused and that's why I came on here. .. but I guess he's not so thanks again all!
Update:
I blocked Mr crazy from sending me any more messages. I later received a phone call from an unknown number which I answered answered and it was him. See this is what I don't get at all. Why go through the trouble if this is only for his ego or to only use somebody? It seems like a ton of wasted energy to me. He wanted to know why I was treating him like a stalker and he was insulted.
I give up. He can send all the text he wants because I'm too tired to put any more mental energy into it. I won't be answering them and further more. ..I accepted a date from a very exciting Leo guy and plan on keeping it.
Aries woman here. You are letting yourself get played. Please stop it. No more turning down dates. Go out and rock your life. A man worth your time would not conduct himself in this manner.
Aries woman here. You are letting yourself get played. Please stop it. No more turning down dates. Go out and rock your life. A man worth your time would not conduct himself in this manner.
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Thanks for your response: I am meeting people left and right since I made the decision to block him. I am not in love with him so it wasn't a hard decision, I am just a person who gives people the benefit of the doubt and didn't want to be wrong about him before I changed direction. I am still not sure because now it seems like he is stepping things up an texting and calling but I have already moved forward and am excepting dates. I really hope I didn't make a mistake. I think some people are too quick to throw people away but I try to understand why a person does something first before I let my ego get to me and head for the hills. I was married once and one lesson I learned is that everyone has a wall and it takes time and effort to get past a person's wall. I needed to be sure Mr aries wasn't just showing me his wall instead of being a butt wipe, which seems to be the general consensus on this forum. I am still not convinced because of his recent behavior, however it doesn't matter anymore, I have turned the page now. It's done.
He knows what buttons to push to turn you on and off. I would stay away from this one. He will keep you around as a play thing until he meets someone he really likes.