Libra Male / March Aries Fem

This topic was created in the Aries forum by libragemmale on Thursday, September 1, 2011 and has 36 replies.
If you are in a happy marriage why are you even bothered?
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Tankyou BlueMoon ! you really drove it home with :
"wtf is he telling me this when he is married?" The whole thing about you being married and telling her this stuff is going to get to her head... and eventually, you risk losing her respect and probably the friendship.
I see it very clearly now , and I don't think I have lead on to her enough to think that I have allready embarrassed myself. Alot of it must be in my head only , it's like she has a spell on me. I'm just gonna be fun and friendly with her and ope for te best ! thanks all for all of your comments
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Again Id like to thank you all for your insights, If you want to beat me up on it that's fine too . I really needed some Aries opinion and I got it . She's a heavy flirter and so am I
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Bluemoon you in particular have been the most helpful ,so thankyou ! I guess all Libras are a little different but I think we are pretty harmless creatures who want peace .There's alot of love in us and sometimes it gets messy with the rest of the world when it comes out. And yep , we flirt Tongue
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As an Aries woman who has had a lot of attention from Libra men let me say that most of the flirting is really on your part. We may go along with it to some extent but from her side, she sees you as being a bit flaky. I truly don't mean to be offensive here but I've had this happen many times with a 'taken' Libra that was begging me to seduce him out of his relationship and I wouldn't bite. Why? I knew the game (wasn't involved with anyone at the time) and I knew he loved my energy and passion. Perhaps it was my selfishness that said, "What's in it for me?" In her case she may think, "I know what he wants but is it worth it?".
Address the issues you have in your 'happy' marriage so you won't look for more. Yes, opposites attract and it can be a wonderful thing. But remember, you are literally playing with fire which most likely will get you and those you love burned.
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Wow Donna I bet youre right , she very well may see me as flakey ! This is becoming embarrassing.I may have made a few foolish mistakes with her , but she popped up out of nowhere and took me by surprise .My imagination wandedred .I am so glad I found this website and got these questions in here. Talking to you Aries really helps to see me outside myself .I know how to handle this from here out , I am committing myself to become less warm with her even though It not my style . . Yes I am fully aware of the issues that could arise if anything between us became more involved.
Thankyou Bluemoon and Donna !! I might need further coaching and I hope I can continue coming to you guys for a bit untill I get it right . There's no way in hell I want to ruin my marrage that's for sure !
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No friendship is worth a marriage. The friendship is dangerous and the marriage is happy..... So what's your question?
Lose the friend. You didn't miss her for 20 years and you won't for the next 20.... but you would miss your spouse were something to go wrong because of this friendship.
It's blind stupidity like this that breaks hearts.
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Hold on for a sec Gemsra ,
I am confident -now that I have asked this group and thought hard about it , that the woman is not trying to seduce me.She wants to be my friend !! this is all I want as well . No one is tearing anyone's clothes off and I ave not cheated on my wife in our 22 yr relationship. I think it will all work out in the end , I just needed some guidence , self evaluation ,and an Aries point of view.
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Sure. Yeah, right. Ok. Whatever.
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Posted by libragemmale
Hey all , need advice - long story if you have the time ...
I have recently re-friended a drop-dead beautiful Aries woman that I knew 20 yrs ago , on a soc network site. I am a 40 something typical handsome smooth Libra Man if I don't say so myself. I have NEVER DATED AN ARIES GIRL so I am in the dark about their behavior. I am happily married (to Virgo woman) and so is this re-friended Aries woman (to Gemini man). Years ago we used to make major league googley eyes in the clubs at eachother but we both had other boyfriends/girlfriends at the time so we never dated or even spoke to eachother much. But there was this undeniable powerful sexual attraction !! I mean it was a force ! I am very sure we both felt it. She recently has made a point to come to meet us at parties... even took her hubby and kids to our house at a party we threw , and then we went to her house a month later. Both of our spouses obliged and may not be fully aware of our attraction.
On the social network site we have flirted back and forth a bit and i have sent her some private messages letting her know how I really adore her. When I do that sort of thing she really clams up. I guess she wants to do the chasing ? I'm not even 100% of her intentions , she is strangely coy for Aries , maybe it's a Piscies cusp thing . I don't want to cheat on my wife and I am pretty sure she would never cheat on her hubby . But I think we may both feel we missed-out on eachother 2(I know I feel that way at least -I can't speak for her).I know she likes my sense of humor and style ,because she has pursued this re-friendship and I am still as smitten of her as I was back in the day . We seem to hit it off very well and have several things in common.
My questions : Can we manage to be good friends or will the sexual tension drive us too crazy to even be able to manage that ? When our eyes meet it's still very intense and I admit i even have a hard time being my usual easy-going and fun loving self with her in the room but I am trying. I have not had any one-on-one time w/ her to clear the air with her . Should I ask her to meet me for lunch to talk it out ? or would that be too forward ? I know Aries women want to make the first move .Should I just try to play cool ? again I just want to be her friend because anything more would be fatal to us both , I can't speak for her but i think she would agree !! after
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Posted by libragemmale
Any tips or hints from you Aries gals out there would be appreciated ,being a Libra male I have befriended many types of women , but the Aries girls just leave me shakin in my boots ! I sometimes wish I would have married one

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^^^^^^^^^^ Just in case you forgot..... or if you decide you wanna hide stuff. smile

I totally spend all this time invested in a "friend" that I am not interested in. Researching their sun sign, sending PRIVATE flirtatious messages, hoping my spouse doesn't know about my "undeniable powerful sexual attraction"..... blah blah blah.

Moral of the story..... lose the friend. Not because of what she does or doesn't want, but because of you.

Men can be so childish about these things, because like always, they want it all.
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Thanks again GemsRa and Impress for all of your input ! I can see how foolish I must look but I wanted to tell the whole story and not hide anything . What I need is a gut check and you helped give it to me . As I was saying I don't know much about fem. Aries personality , which is why I am here. You saw me as childish and that's quite allright because i was !but I know me more than you do and I am not a cheater ,never was ,never will be . I trust myself in this and I am a stronger because of your input . No need to unfriend her , just learn how to deal with her on her terms.
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Most likely she is the one sending strong signals to you. Just stick to your virgo wife.. playing with fire gets people burnt. The Aries seductress is one of the most powerful (if not THE most powerful) when they want a man. There are two options: Play along, or go away. Either of the options will be your responsibility. You just have to know that.
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"On the social network site we have flirted back and forth a bit and i have sent her some private messages letting her know how I really adore her. When I do that sort of thing she really clams up. I guess she wants to do the chasing?"

Nothing about that ^^^^^^ says any of the following:
A. I'm married.
B. I'm married.
C. I'm married.
It also doesn't say anything about just wanting to be her friend.

If you've assessed the situation and feel better about it, good for you. I'd drop all the private messaging and chatting nonsense though. If she wasn't a close girlfriend before, if she and you have intense sexual chemistry, and you've just gotten around to becoming friends 20 years later there's no reason you should be anything more than casual friends. Ever.
Aries woman or not, her perusive powers or not, her intensions or not..... it just ain't right.
Oh, but I am an Aries moon after all. smile
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Ahhhh.. the Libra male's flirting and mental stimulation... gone too far. Can you SHOW your wife the conversations with this "friend" and your posts on DXP? And would she chuckle and joke with you about it? Would she agree it was harmless flirting, and fine? Or do you KNOW that showing her what's been going on would open a can of worms? You know right from wrong, Libra. Anything you cannot show your wife is WRONG. If she had the SAME thing going on with some other guy.. would that be FINE with you? Or is that a double-standard?
Case in point: I'm fine with the flirting Libra boys do, unless it crosses the line into propositioning, or secretive, inappropriate territory, like a borderline emotional affair.. I feel marginalized, devalued, unloved, disrespected. How DARE you put yourself in this position with some other woman! How DARE you not hold me as #1, in ALL ways, at ALL times! You'd have lost your damn MIND if I'd done something like this!
So my bitch side comes out and you come home one night to find your shit all neatly packed for you, cuz I'm DONE, adios baby. You realize what you've done, what you've lost, over "flirting" and funsies when bored... and you spend MONTHS busting your ass to prove yourself to the woman you've loved for years - to PROVE it won't happen again and she's your one and only, faithfully.
Six months later, you're a few steps closer and SORT OF working it out, but she's still hurting.. and no, she's not buying what you're selling. And the trust you broke isn't back, she still doesn't fully trust you like she did. And no, things will never be the same again, sorry Charlie. Maybe we can rebuild this in a new way, maybe we can't... and you truly regret what you did that messed up a good thing with the best woman you've ever known. It would have been SO much easier to just end the "friendship" instead of letting it go far enough for me to find out. But YOU did this, not me. Keep busting your ass, dear Libra... faltering now will be the last time, and I will be SO GONE that you will think I was a GHOST, a figment of your imagination all these years.
Don't do this, Libra man. Cut the Aries loose.
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Right now I'm about ready to jump off a bridge..
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thankyou Nefer
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Posted by libragemmale
Right now I'm about ready to jump off a bridge..


No need for thatSad
How about sending the saucy messages to your wife instead of Ms Aries?
Then report back with results.
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i send saucy stuff to her all day long and i can't keep my hands off her . trust me on that !
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Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Posted by libragemmale
Right now I'm about ready to jump off a bridge..


No need for thatSad
How about sending the saucy messages to your wife instead of Ms Aries?
Then report back with results.
click to expand


+1 x 1,000,000
No bridges, except the one you BURN with the Aries. Flirt with your WIFE, watch what it does for your marriage!
And Libra man, in case you were wondering.. my story there was absolutely true, and it's exactly what happened and we are STILL struggling with the ripple effect. Not cheating, never cheating.. just flirting gone way too far. I was unable to deal with my loss of TRUST in him, and me becoming this hurt and humiliated and distrustful woman I didn't even recognize. I HATED what I became, what this DID to me, what this TURNED ME INTO. And I STILL HATE that I cannot TRUST him, that he HURT me in this way after all these years. He's trying, OMG is he ever trying... but the warming up process is slow and painful, and I'm stubborn as hell. Maybe he can pull a miracle out of thin air.. but if not, I'm just fine without him, and that scares him too. But I DESERVE a man who puts me as #1, always. I will not settle for less. He STILL doesn't live here again, and I'm STILL "single" on FB. And that's the way it will be until I'm READY to trust him again. It SUCKS for him, our friends cannot believe he did this.. but admit he's definitely changed from it.
I see you starting on the same path HE did, and I already KNOW what it can do to a loving relationship. So I was compelled to tell you MY story, to warn you what I see coming, to warn you what it can do to your WIFE - and the havoc it would wreak on your marriage, perhaps unfixable damage. Six months ago, it was discussed an awful lot on the Libra boards. Today.. well, today I know that I LOVE him.. but I also know that sometimes I don't LIKE him very much. And it's still not fixed.. you can't undo the past, the damage is done. We're trying to move past it.. but it's hard, so hard. And he honestly wishes he'd never done this. Because I DON'T love him the same as I did, our relationship is NOT what it once was. It's changed forever. Please don't make the same mistake. Put your wife FIRST.
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"How about sending the saucy messages to your wife instead of Ms Aries?
Then report back with results."
Aries moon here.....I second this! lol
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The neverending physical/chemistry/attraction between Libra/Aries. I'm with the Aries ladies here.....your both MARRIED! If it needs to be spelled out for you it's M A R R I E D. Tongue
Is there something in your marriage that is lacking that you would want/try to get involved with this Aries lady? OR, is your Aries interest just the appitizer you "have" before going home and making sweet love down by the fire to your wife?
(This isn't a question that needs to be answered publicly....just something to think about internally)
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Once a Libra boss pursued me. I did not want to pursue him. I wanted to be friends with him because he was funny. He got a little obsessive trying to spend time with me. I could see exactly what he was trying to do. I was not attracted to him at all anymore, but felt bad for him. He asked me to make-out with him. I gave him a kiss... felt horrible.. and left.
Now I'm sad because I wanted to be friends with him, but it's awkward. And I've seen that all he really wants is sex (moved wayy fast) which makes me lose a lot of respect for him.
Aries girls can tell exactly what you are up to, but we like making friends with good people. Be a good person and make a friend. Be a bad person and lose a friend; those are your options.
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I'm an Aries Venus... and my (Leo Venus) Libra's inappropriate flirting was with a (taken) Leo woman. But even now he cannot escape the pull of my Venus on his Sun and the way our Fire Venuses mix... or the way our Earth (Virgo/Taurus) Moons mesh. Our chemistry and connection is UNREAL... The Mercuries are a bitch though.. Pisces and Libra. A lot of work and compromise to communicate effectively.
But I daresay there's probably nothing "lacking" in this Libragemmale guy's marriage.. truly, I feel it's just a bit of attraction that took him by surprise.. flirting and funsies.. exciting and stimulating, even though he's positive he'd NEVER actually cheat. (The deja vu is making me feel dizzy! haha) But it can come back to bite him in the ass.. and NO fun flirting is worth risking the destruction of your marriage!
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Does it really destroy marriages? I thought everyone just had their cake, ate it and stayed married.
Of course I have never been married, just an observation from outside.
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Hey guys I am taking every single word you say very seriously ! Thankyou all for chiming in .
one thing to note - I reread my story and I may have exaggerated a bit :I never sent any saucy private messages to her , except that I told her how much I admired her (not adored her) in private. Yes I know this is damaging enough! The rest was in public forums with light flirting , and quite obviously IN MY HEAD ! When we met in person I was nothing less than a gentleman and she was also very much a lady.
Nefer if there is ANYTHING I can do to help you please feel free , I came here for help and I am getting it .I respect all of your opinions and i owe all of you and I thank you.
Nefer please be patient with your Libra man - remember he never cheated , which would take an entirely different mindset to have the nerve to do. I could never imagine cheating on my wife (or even kissing/holding another woman)and I would bet your Libra is very much the same. Us Libra men are not evil , we just love to love . You have no idea how much I love my wife of 20 yrs ! + 2 dating .
Nefer I am really soooo sorry to hear your story Sad
I'm wishing the both of you my best ,If you need to ask me Libra Man questions please don't hesitate !!
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I think you need to calm down...lol From my experiences Libra's have a tendancy to make a mountain out of a mole hill. You are probably right Nefer. I have Libra in my 7th....funsies and flirting are very natural/exciting for me smile
If you are CONFIDENT that cheating is not an option, then just enjoy the flirting/attraction for what it is.
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I just KNEW you'd be able to identify with him, libragemmale.. because you're both bigtime flirts, and neither of you ever intended to follow through on your bit of funsies. Your story just set off such strong deja vu in me that I felt nauseated. You and he are very, very similar I think. Flirts, not cheats. Totally in love with your woman, and would be absolutely knocked into the DIRT to lose her. I hope you don't need it to actually HAPPEN to know that.
I feel amused that you feel defensive of him.. you identify with him, you SEE how it could be taken all wrong, as more serious than the funsies it really was (to you).. and *I* am here to tell you the OTHER side, how your "harmless flirting" gone too far (to her) can WRECK a woman's trust in you. You don't want that, trust me.
I'm *incredibly* patient (Taurus Moon haha).. it's been his one saving grace. He has a CHANCE.. slim, but definitely there... but six months ago, it was DONE, OVER, and I would not even SPEAK to him or respond to his frenzied texts and calls and IMs, much less allow him to SEE me in person for WEEKS. He jumped through flaming hoops to get this second chance, and he really IS trying hard, really knocking my socks off. God, I sometimes feel SO BAD for what he has to go through right now.. then I remind myself that he brought this on himself.. and if he doesn't have the strength or desire to do everything in his power to rebuild this.. then he's not the man for me, period. And I won't apologize for demanding the absolute BEST this man can give me... the amount of "best" lurking in him that's suddenly gotten a violent shove into the light.. really took me by surprise. GOD, I love this man. OMG you Libra men are like Kryptonite... how the HELL do you do it?? You should all come with warning labels, damnit. :p
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Nefer there is alot for me to digest here , I might want to look up your story on the Libra board but generally I think its similar to mine. I can't stress how lucky I feel to have this group to talk things out . All of this is very heavy on my heart when i think of how things could go wrong. I would die if i woke up partnerless , Libras NEED a partner. We can't breathe without someone next to us , and it's touture when we suffer a love loss.It Hasnt happened to me in 22 yrs but i remember it like it was yesterday.
Nefer i can assure you when anyone mentions your name to your Libra , his heart literally drops to the floor , when he thinks of you (and i guarentee its EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY if he loves you) his heart thumps like a car wheel going over a speed bump. This is how Libras feel love and loss . I guarentee he cries himself to sleep like a baby without you IF he loves you. Libra men cry , and it's real tears- Ive done it alot lately . So please continue to be patient like you said you are , he needs to know he is still loved or he is hopeless.
Oh and ps thankyou for the Kryptonite note that was sweet , (but I am not flirting !)
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Sheesh.. if you weren't 45 instead of almost 39.. I'd swear you were him. It's positively eerie Tongue
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KK darling, I got one last thing for you.... I'm glad you are coming around and getting the advice you need. I know you feel that you got hit over the head with a big ole stick for a story that was accidentally over exaggerated.... BUT here's the thing. They were your words, from your thoughts. If they were exaggerated when you wrote them, they were exaggerated in your mind.
Spend some time on that and you'll understand the point behind it all.
Peace and chicken grease! smile
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Posted by libragemmale
Hold on for a sec Gemsra ,
I am confident -now that I have asked this group and thought hard about it , that the woman is not trying to seduce me.She wants to be my friend !! this is all I want as well . No one is tearing anyone's clothes off and I ave not cheated on my wife in our 22 yr relationship. I think it will all work out in the end , I just needed some guidence , self evaluation ,and an Aries point of view.

no they dont want to be your friend. They want to use friendship as an excuse to get a step in the door and "seduce". When there is attraction there isn't really friendship. If you're so happy with your wife then why do you even think of straying? There is probably lack of passion in your marriage that you potentially see in the Aries.
And no, trust, she is seducing you, not the other way around. That's why you're so confused.
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The comments about my wife are hurtful .Is there a way I can remove this entire thread because i have had enough now.
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Nefer,
The Libra male who keeps looking and flirting is unstable and cannot be trusted. I can't tell you how many Libra men with girlfriends came on to me and would tell me how she doesn't do this or that...blah, endlessly. Now, maybe that was all bunk to try to seduce me but the one I knew from work for over a year had serious issues (according to him), yet he wouldn't take my advice to confront it and seek counseling, no, he just waited until they got into a huge argument where he had to leave. I think he felt more comfortable that the break-up be her decision.
I'm not saying Libra's are cheaters. My Mom is a Libra and she is extremely loyal and devoted. It's just that you are dealing with a man who is not comfortable making a uncomfortable decision. It's a double edged sword with a venus ruled person. They want to be nice and hate confrontation but will look elsewhere if they aren't happy to hopefully (in their mind) be so consumed with someone new that they can't help themselves. They won't act on it, they want us to do the dirty work. I didn't Winking knowing full well of the game he wanted to play.
Libragem shouldn't be thinking or caring about what another woman thinks about him or feels. Perhaps reality sunk in and he realizes it now. Venus ruled signs love the idea of being in love and need to feel it. Once the typical doldrums of a normal relationship set in, they are the most susceptible to being swept up in a momentary passion. Predatory females exist and none are more so than an Aries. I'll admit I enjoyed the idea but didn't want to deal with the consequences.
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^^^i agree with the above post.
i hate to trash talk my own sign but libras are unfortunately known for making others do their dirty work. i think there is a major difference between a love of peace and a fear of taking action (especially when it's so necessary) and a fear of being disliked.
i know some libras who complain about their lives like there is no damn tomorrow yet they do absolutely nothing about it.
they just sit there and wait for a magical situation to fall out of the sky.
i'm a libra and i do my own dirty work. i'm contantly getting things done on my own so nobody can ever call me lazy lol
as for the OP, it looks like he is regretting the fact that he even created this topic in the first place lol if he's so happy in his marriage like he says he is, then what's the problem? quit thinking about other women.
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