Pisces female and Aries male

This topic was created in the Aries forum by TurtleSoup on Tuesday, September 20, 2011 and has 29 replies.
Hello, I'm in dire need of some guidance and advice pertaining to a Pisces and Aries relationship.
Okay, so I am a Pisces female (on the cusp of Aquarious) and my guy in question is an Aries (right on the cusp of a Pisces).
We've been friends for a pretty long time, 7-8 years. We've always had lots of funny conversations, been there through some of each others relationships and we've just always gotten along really well. I've always considered him to be a really good friend. We've also liked each other for a really long time as well, but it just never happened for us until just recently.
We finally got a chance to be together. Things went GREAT for a short while and then the Aries started to get distant, and that worried me and I would ask him and he'd say things were fine and that I didn't need to worry. Well, we ended up having a discussion about it and he thought I broke up with him... so he got really mad and stopped talking to me for a little bit. We then made up, and continued to be together... but this time he was even more distant... and I again got worried and asked him about it and he said he didn't want to do this again, so I didn't bring it up again, I just kept quiet about it. Then we had a date set up, and he didn't talk to me most of the day that we were supposed to have our date, except for once to say that he missed me, and then ignored me the rest of the day and never went on our date. He then started to ignore me and we didn't talk for a week. I messaged him and told him that I was sorry for whatever I did and then he replies to the text asking me to go on a trip with him. I say that I can't and he goes silent on me again, until I reply back with how I might be able to go and I'll see what I can do. Then he starts talking to me again and planning the trip, and I find out that I really just can't possibly go, so he stops talking to me again.
So now, I tell him that I just want things to go back to normal and if we could at least just be friends, and then I asked him what he wants and he replies with "I want us to be together, but I don't want to be doubted". And I was fine with that, but I replied telling him that I need more communication in the relationship then. And he hasn't spoken to me since. I've tried to say everything I could to get him to talk to me again and he's just not talking.
I don't really know what to do at this point. I still really want him in my life.
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I hope so. Bat
He randomly texted me again, but as usual, he's gone silent again.
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Sad instead of the bat lol.
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Posted by impresswho
Pisces women are usually very feisty, so tap into your feisty and stop allowing him to run all over you. Say what you need and want and accept nothing less. Besides you??re a freaking Pisces for goodness sake use your intuition and feel your way around it. Your intuition is never wrong.


I think my Cancer moon overrules me a bit.
Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.
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Posted by impresswho
Posted by TurtleSoup
I hope so. Bat
He randomly texted me again, but as usual, he's gone silent again.


When you write ^^^^ what exactly does this mean? He has gone silent. Does that mean he doesn??t contact you for hours, days, weeks, months?
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Basically I usually get one text a day.
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Posted by impresswho
Pisces women are usually very feisty, so tap into your feisty and stop allowing him to run all over you. Say what you need and want and accept nothing less. Besides you??re a freaking Pisces for goodness sake use your intuition and feel your way around it. Your intuition is never wrong.


truth. although the intuition can get hazy when the issue is too close to us, know what i mean? like the instincts are so close to home you can't see the truth of the situation until you step back...
but +1 for the 'tapping into your feisty' bit. he's a scorp, so show him you mean business. don't play his games. talk to him when you feel like it, don't give in to the push and pull, it can be a neverending game if you let it get too far.
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Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by impresswho
Pisces women are usually very feisty, so tap into your feisty and stop allowing him to run all over you. Say what you need and want and accept nothing less. Besides you??re a freaking Pisces for goodness sake use your intuition and feel your way around it. Your intuition is never wrong.


I think my Cancer moon overrules me a bit.
Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.
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you can't feel your way around cos he's aware you're trying to and is blocking you.
but one text a day ain't so bad is it? if you want things to go further, be straight up. scorps love bluntness and respond to it every scorp i've known, it's the same thing. but they're quite happy to play dumb if you let it happen.
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like with the scorp i knew. flirting, talking up a storm, it was all good. but i couldn't get a 'read' on him. so one day i was like, 'what's going on with you? i get the sense you're not being 100% straight with me.'
and he ended up admitting he really wasn't up for a relationship. that he thought i had a rockadelic personality and he would like us to be friends. which made sense to me. if i wasn't trying so hard to figure him out, i would have seen that he was just biding time, playing around, and backed all the way off. but he was quite happy to play the game, because i was allowing it.
anyway, we're really good friends now. so i would say try dropping some truth on him, you might be surprised at the reaction you get. it's better than swimming in the dark, no?
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for god's sake, i just realised your guy is an aries. pay me no mind! *bangs head against desk*
insomnia is not kind to the old brain cells
seriously, i don't know what planet i'm on, lol.
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You have offended him and hurt his ego, therefore he is distancing himself from you. At this point, you should not do anything. The ball is in his court now, and if he wants to talk to you he will find a way to contact you.
Best of luck.
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Posted by impresswho
Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by impresswho
Pisces women are usually very feisty, so tap into your feisty and stop allowing him to run all over you. Say what you need and want and accept nothing less. Besides you??re a freaking Pisces for goodness sake use your intuition and feel your way around it. Your intuition is never wrong.


I think my Cancer moon overrules me a bit.
Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.


Cancers are intuitive and feisty too.
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Usually I would tell him off. And I have a few times. But I don't know, I just can't seem to let this one go. He wants all or nothing... and he wants it his way. And I'm trying to give it to him his way but I guess I keep making it seem like it's not his way because I'm kind of strong on where I'm standing with him. I told him I need more communication and he's not going for it? I don't know what to do. I'd like us to just be friends, but it seems like that's not what he wants. He wants me or nothing at all. But now I'm starting to think that he thinks I'm playing games with him.
I've asked several other people about this, and they think that it looks like I'm playing games with him and that's probably why he's backing off. That maybe he feels insecure and hurt. I'm not trying to play games at all though, but I can see how it would seem that way. But I really don't know how he feels or what he thinks, like I said, it's super hard to read this guy!
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I don't know if it helps at all, but I have a Cancer moon, and he has a Virgo moon. And we both have a Pisces Venus.
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Posted by firewaterair
You have offended him and hurt his ego, therefore he is distancing himself from you. At this point, you should not do anything. The ball is in his court now, and if he wants to talk to you he will find a way to contact you.
Best of luck.


Yeah, I know. I waited a week before.. and after that is when he invited me on the trip, but I think I've offended him again.
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Posted by impresswho
TS
Wait, you just want to be friends, and he wants all of you (relationship). Is that what you mean?


I'm willing to just be friends with him is what I mean.
I want to be with him, but it doesn't seem to be working out and I don't want to lose him as a friend as well as a partner.
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"I say that I can't and he goes silent on me again, until I reply back with how I might be able to go and I'll see what I can do. Then he starts talking to me again and planning the trip, and I find out that I really just can't possibly go, so he stops talking to me again".
He thinks you're a bit flaky and not true to your word. I've dated a Pisces for 5 years and although they mean well, their indecisiveness and false hope can really play a number on an Aries. We start losing faith and trust in them, and ultimately respect. There was always a miscommunication on our part, even early on, but my Pisces ex just could not let me go and played on my sympathy (which I had an abundance of due to my Pisces moon). Now that I can take a step back from the situation, I realized that if things weren't working out early on in the relationship, it's foolish to think they will smooth out years down the road. Best to save your efforts for someone who can truly understand you and accept you for who you are.
Also, you can't force him to want to be friends with you because to him, you were the cause of his unhappiness. I know it sounds terrible, but I would never befriend an ex simply because there's no point unless one of us still had feelings for one another. Maybe he feels like he would be leading you on when he just wants to end it.
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Posted by firewaterair

He thinks you're a bit flaky and not true to your word. I've dated a Pisces for 5 years and although they mean well, their indecisiveness and false hope can really play a number on an Aries.


i used to be guilty of this. until all the karma started coming back on me, so i fixed up
my ex was an aries, mar 24th. it was so on and off and we drove each other nuts. aries guys are pretty straightforward, the pisces nonsense can get a bit much for them and they'll back off. it's an ego thing, too. i mean, the trip issue would be frustrating for an aries-they appreciate direct answers.
so, he's sulking for a bit right now. i'm sure he'll get over it. just make sure you're being direct on your side of things
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Posted by firewaterair
Maybe he feels like he would be leading you on when he just wants to end it.


Then why would he ask me to go with him? And why would he also tell me he wants us to be together? I guess I don't get it if he's trying to let me go... I would think he would just let things go and not bring up trips and us being together.
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Posted by nimbue
Posted by firewaterair

He thinks you're a bit flaky and not true to your word. I've dated a Pisces for 5 years and although they mean well, their indecisiveness and false hope can really play a number on an Aries.


i used to be guilty of this. until all the karma started coming back on me, so i fixed up
my ex was an aries, mar 24th. it was so on and off and we drove each other nuts. aries guys are pretty straightforward, the pisces nonsense can get a bit much for them and they'll back off. it's an ego thing, too. i mean, the trip issue would be frustrating for an aries-they appreciate direct answers.
so, he's sulking for a bit right now. i'm sure he'll get over it. just make sure you're being direct on your side of things
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I guess it just confuses me because I know I'm not trying to be flaky. I told him up front that I might not be able to go and that I'll see what I can do. I guess I shouldn't have said anything at all unless I knew I could go.
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it's not your fault, just a difference in communication? probably he got his hopes up, then was disappointed when you couldn't go after all. just something to watch out for in the future smile

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Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by impresswho

Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.


I don't know about the cusp deal here, but for an Aries to be hard to read smells of trouble in paradise to me.
The only time I am "unreadable" is if I am not that into you, as they say. If I am really attracted/attached to you, there ain't much between what goes on in my head and you hearing about. I may have times when I am mulling things over, and that can come across as being distant. But, from what I am reading, this is about him creating distance, and not thinking things through internally.
Just doesn't feel like a positive deal here.
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Posted by dofacc
Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by impresswho

Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.


I don't know about the cusp deal here, but for an Aries to be hard to read smells of trouble in paradise to me.
The only time I am "unreadable" is if I am not that into you, as they say. If I am really attracted/attached to you, there ain't much between what goes on in my head and you hearing about. I may have times when I am mulling things over, and that can come across as being distant. But, from what I am reading, this is about him creating distance, and not thinking things through internally.
Just doesn't feel like a positive deal here.


Well, he is going through a lot right now. I'm guessing that could be a reason. We worked the trip thing out and now we're doing fine so far?
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Posted by dofacc
Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by impresswho

Usually I would use my intuition to feel my way around this, but this guy is the hardest person I've ever tried to read in my life. It's almost impossible. I'm in the dark with this one.


I don't know about the cusp deal here, but for an Aries to be hard to read smells of trouble in paradise to me.
The only time I am "unreadable" is if I am not that into you, as they say. If I am really attracted/attached to you, there ain't much between what goes on in my head and you hearing about. I may have times when I am mulling things over, and that can come across as being distant. But, from what I am reading, this is about him creating distance, and not thinking things through internally.
Just doesn't feel like a positive deal here.


Most Pisces males I know are hard to read. Maybe he's got a lot of Pisces tendencies?
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^^^Exactly
His processes may be different enough from mine that I really don't have any real insight. buyer beware, and all that.....
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Posted by dofacc
^^^Exactly
His processes may be different enough from mine that I really don't have any real insight. buyer beware, and all that.....



Yeah, he's like a few hours away from almost being a Pisces, so you never know lol.
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I think we've gotten passed things now though, but I'm not sure if we're completely fine yet, but it's looking better at least. smile
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Nevermind, spoke too soon.
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Posted by TurtleSoup
Posted by firewaterair
Maybe he feels like he would be leading you on when he just wants to end it.


Then why would he ask me to go with him? And why would he also tell me he wants us to be together? I guess I don't get it if he's trying to let me go... I would think he would just let things go and not bring up trips and us being together.
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He's not heartless and still has feelings for you. He's giving you another chance to prove yourself, but those days are numbered if you continue giving him false hope. From now on, be direct with him and give him reasons as to why you cannot go and offer a solution to reschedule the trip upfront.
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Posted by impresswho
Posted by TurtleSoup
Nevermind, spoke too soon.


Huh, what happened?
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Everything was going fine, I even went and made some sacrifices to go on the trip with him. And we talked most of the day that day, planning everything. Then something happened on his end and now he's not going because he's upset. So now that the trip is back off, he's back to being distant again.
I really couldn't take it anymore so I finally told him that I'm not doing this anymore, and that I'm just going to give him some space and if we're friends in the future then that's great, but I don't see that happening any time soon.
I don't know what is up with him, but I can't just keep throwing myself out there and letting him run all over me.
Thank you every body that tried to help me out. I really do appreciate it.
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All I am seeing is you getting whip sawed back and forth. I get the sense that you have put a lot of effort into trying to make this work, but he keeps sabotaging the whole thing.
Time to cut and run, little girly!!!
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