What is easy and what is right
This topic was created in the Aries forum by phoenixblaze26 on Wednesday, May 14, 2008 and has 18 replies.
So since I first started typing away my thoughts and questions on dxp, I've noticed out of all the boards the scorpio board seems the most productive... wtf!? Granted I've enjoyed their conversations and it's given me great insight into the scorpio mind (i.e. my bf) and i've learned how to move around certain situations into my favor, but still.
I was watching Harry potter 4th movie (something of fire?) last night and the last quote of the movie stood out to me. "there will come a time, where we must decide between what is right and what is easy'. Ever feel like you give the most useful advice and never find yourself taking it? I have a tendancy to put my foot right back into my mouth after a screwed up comment i had or moment of 'omg that didnt just happen'. I give fairly useful and realistic advice to others and due to my aries moon i've been able to go a lot farther in most adventures then i probably would've with my other timid side. How do you finally make yourself take your own advice? it's like i have good advice, and i know what i 'should' do, but thats not gonna always get the odds in my favor. maybe thats why people fear taking their own advice? Just curious, implusive behavior is an aries thing and im VERY implusive... how do you calm urself down?
i've done the same things sooooo many times
i'm very reactionary myself and impulsive as well. i've dropped relationships and friendships and business associations at a glance or because someone looked or didn't look, said or didn't say the right or wrong thing..etc. i tend to overreact to some things in my mind and not in person, thank god for that! i try to internalize and feel all positive and negative emotions and withdraw for a bit to gather my emotions in a safe place. then i figure out scenarious in my mind what that situation is and how it makes me feel. then i try to put myself in the other person's shoes and see how it would make me feel. then after i'm more in control of my emotional state i try to say a positive thing to another person pertaining the situation. i think 95% of time when i imagine that things are going to hell, they're not as bad as they seem or i just misunderstood things or they were misrepresented by another person. unfortunately, because of the past not so positive life experiences i tend to go into a negative mode with most of the situations. but i'm a positive person by nature and constantly struggle with that positive/negative push/pull analyzing/overanalizing reacting/non reacting situation. so, my advice is: try to give positive instead of negative reaction, or retreat when you're ready to approach the situation with a clear cool mind or anything else fails, exercise. usually, physical activity calms me down. hope it makes sense!
i'm very reactionary myself and impulsive as well. i've dropped relationships and friendships and business associations at a glance or because someone looked or didn't look, said or didn't say the right or wrong thing..etc. i tend to overreact to some things in my mind and not in person, thank god for that! i try to internalize and feel all positive and negative emotions and withdraw for a bit to gather my emotions in a safe place. then i figure out scenarious in my mind what that situation is and how it makes me feel. then i try to put myself in the other person's shoes and see how it would make me feel. then after i'm more in control of my emotional state i try to say a positive thing to another person pertaining the situation. i think 95% of time when i imagine that things are going to hell, they're not as bad as they seem or i just misunderstood things or they were misrepresented by another person. unfortunately, because of the past not so positive life experiences i tend to go into a negative mode with most of the situations. but i'm a positive person by nature and constantly struggle with that positive/negative push/pull analyzing/overanalizing reacting/non reacting situation. so, my advice is: try to give positive instead of negative reaction, or retreat when you're ready to approach the situation with a clear cool mind or anything else fails, exercise. usually, physical activity calms me down. hope it makes sense!
"How do you finally make yourself take your own advice? it's like i have good advice, and i know what i 'should' do, but thats not gonna always get the odds in my favor. maybe thats why people fear taking their own advice? Just curious, implusive behavior is an aries thing and im VERY implusive... how do you calm urself down?"
phoenix .. people would like to believe that there is a such thing as empathy, and there really isn't such a condition. If people were actually able to experience feelings of another person then all of us would be able to live/apply to our lives what happened to another because to have real empathy would mean we experienced it. We didn't experience it, that's why we can't apply it.
You have to experience life for yourself to make use of it .. but, that doesn't mean people aren't observant, logical or have enough wisdom to "see" another persons errors, or a wrong path. You just can't apply it to your life until you've experienced it for yourself, is all.
A problem that I see in which arises quite often when trying to apply a situation in your life, in which you (third person) experienced but cannot make use of it, is when the negative is disregarded. People have this misconception that they will only acknowledge positive input and output .. and this is faulty .. this is what causes people to continue falling off the same ledge.
Negative exists in this world .. it has to be acknowledged. If a person doesn't acknowledge negative, then there can be no real growth in your life for inherently ... people err.
It doesn't mean you have to only embrace the negative .. but, if it's ignored, then errors are also ignored = stagnation in person growth.
phoenix .. people would like to believe that there is a such thing as empathy, and there really isn't such a condition. If people were actually able to experience feelings of another person then all of us would be able to live/apply to our lives what happened to another because to have real empathy would mean we experienced it. We didn't experience it, that's why we can't apply it.
You have to experience life for yourself to make use of it .. but, that doesn't mean people aren't observant, logical or have enough wisdom to "see" another persons errors, or a wrong path. You just can't apply it to your life until you've experienced it for yourself, is all.
A problem that I see in which arises quite often when trying to apply a situation in your life, in which you (third person) experienced but cannot make use of it, is when the negative is disregarded. People have this misconception that they will only acknowledge positive input and output .. and this is faulty .. this is what causes people to continue falling off the same ledge.
Negative exists in this world .. it has to be acknowledged. If a person doesn't acknowledge negative, then there can be no real growth in your life for inherently ... people err.
It doesn't mean you have to only embrace the negative .. but, if it's ignored, then errors are also ignored = stagnation in person growth.
((people would like to believe that there is a such thing as empathy, and there really isn't such a condition. If people were actually able to experience feelings of another person then all of us would be able to live/apply to our lives what happened to another because to have real empathy would mean we experienced it. We didn't experience it, that's why we can't apply it.))
well said.
well said.
Ariesgirl, I'm happy that every time I've posted something you've always been able to understand me... THANK GOD! Yay i don't feel like a total wacko!
Any who, i completely understand and have learned to walk away when im not in the right state of mind to talk or give advice, especially when pissed. Recently it's not that anything has been going wrong, its more like everything has been to 'right'. Ever feel uncomfortable with being comfortable?
p-angel, very true, i definitely agree. A libra / scorp once said it best. 'If you did not kno pain, how could u know joy, if not sorrow how could you feel happiness, without hate what would love be?'. Every thing's in balance, but its logical that a person would prefer more of one side rather the other.
Any who, i completely understand and have learned to walk away when im not in the right state of mind to talk or give advice, especially when pissed. Recently it's not that anything has been going wrong, its more like everything has been to 'right'. Ever feel uncomfortable with being comfortable?
p-angel, very true, i definitely agree. A libra / scorp once said it best. 'If you did not kno pain, how could u know joy, if not sorrow how could you feel happiness, without hate what would love be?'. Every thing's in balance, but its logical that a person would prefer more of one side rather the other.
On the topic, i feel confused really, it took me a while to review my thoughts, lifes good as far as work, friends, and family are concerned. Yet i feel like somethings missing. My mother always drilled into me that 'nothing is ever enough' (possibly because my moms a sag and always changing her ways), and now i feel that perceptions taking over me life. Yes, i finally got the promotion i wanted. Yes my sisters recent words of keeping better company have stuck in and made me look at my friends closely (you are who your friends are right?). Yes i finally got the guy i wanted and hes been wonderful and is coming home this week, and my walk-in closet has just been completed. Yet is that enough? Like obviously theres more to life then what I've mentioned, but those are the basics.
Is it better to have a stable life or risk it all again? I got a job offer else where, same position that i recently achieved, but it seems risky. The field is a lot bigger and I'm worried i wont have what it takes to do the job. I know i can do it with practice, but i already have so much cred at my current position. I've been working at my company for a year and i know everything here. is it better to take this risk or not?
Is it better to have a stable life or risk it all again? I got a job offer else where, same position that i recently achieved, but it seems risky. The field is a lot bigger and I'm worried i wont have what it takes to do the job. I know i can do it with practice, but i already have so much cred at my current position. I've been working at my company for a year and i know everything here. is it better to take this risk or not?
It depends on how important adventure is to you. Obviously it tempts you greatly but you have to weigh how far you've gone and what you're willing to lose versus what you might possibly gain. Some people have a destructive identity (they don't know themselves is everything is working smoothly). You'll need to closely examine the pros and cons of a life-changing decision and more importantly, be willing to take the consequences. Good luck!
phoenixblaze26 - "Recently it's not that anything has been going wrong, its more like everything has been to 'right'. Ever feel uncomfortable with being comfortable?" - omg! i'm going through the same exact thing!!! i'm overanalyzing things right now. if there is something even remotely not the way i'd do things or say things i start thinking there is something wrong. i know it's a total overreacting but can't help it i just want to get all the negativity out of me.
i just want to get all the negativity out of me.Is it better to have a stable life or risk it all again? I got a job offer else where, same position that i recently achieved, but it seems risky. The field is a lot bigger and I'm worried i wont have what it takes to do the job. I know i can do it with practice, but i already have so much cred at my current position. I've been working at my company for a year and i know everything here. is it better to take this risk or not? - i usually see if the money/status/growth potential worth leaving your current situation. another factor is the immediate group of people you're going to have to interact with.
Well the jobs a bit bigger in the sense a much larger selection of merchandise. I'm currently a inventory planner for a small company, but not exactly in my field, but still in the same type of work i was trained in. Now the job offer i've gotten is in the field i trained in, money is about the same, much more room for growth (considering larger company). But its a fact that the freedoms i have in my current position, will obviously not be the same in my new position if i choose to accept it. So it's like it would be moving in the direction i want, but i do enjoy my current position, but my current job is slightly unstable. There seems to be a move in my company, which might mean i'd have to relocate to Connecticut. Honestly i have no desire to move, its not a sure thing as of yet... but im kinda between the two.
And yea ariesgirl, i hate the comfortable, but im worried about the unknown. I feel like every things fine, but this thats rare so naturally i feel something has to be wrong.
side note, i went to a psychic years ago that said i'd come to a road in my life where i had to officially make a choice and it would determine the rest of the direction in my life. One would be a simple life and one would be a ever changing and hectic life. and i got my tarot done last night for the first time and the guy said everyones paving the road for me and that i've been trained to do take this on....im such a psychic junkie!
And yea ariesgirl, i hate the comfortable, but im worried about the unknown. I feel like every things fine, but this thats rare so naturally i feel something has to be wrong.
side note, i went to a psychic years ago that said i'd come to a road in my life where i had to officially make a choice and it would determine the rest of the direction in my life. One would be a simple life and one would be a ever changing and hectic life. and i got my tarot done last night for the first time and the guy said everyones paving the road for me and that i've been trained to do take this on....im such a psychic junkie!
"i hate the comfortable, but im worried about the unknown. I feel like every things fine, but this thats rare so naturally i feel something has to be wrong."- well, i'm glad i'm not the only one who's imagining things i, on the other hand, crave the comfortable and the stable at this point of my life. i've had so many turbulances, emotional ups and downs and all the unknown i can handle. right now, i want stablitiy and knowing in both personal and professional lifes.
re: your job - if you don't want to move take the job where you can stay where you are. if you want to move up in the job then take the job where the move is possible. smaller companies offer more freedome but it's like a dead end job really. i've done some merchandise planning before.
"im such a psychic junkie!" - me too! unfortunately, the ones i've seen were just mediocre or just not the real thing. if you have someone you can recomend that'd be great! i like the way they talk in abstract terms and nothing concrete those are the ones who are good at reading body language and making good educated guesses based on it. but there are some "real" ones and those are the ones i'm trying to get to.
i, on the other hand, crave the comfortable and the stable at this point of my life. i've had so many turbulances, emotional ups and downs and all the unknown i can handle. right now, i want stablitiy and knowing in both personal and professional lifes. re: your job - if you don't want to move take the job where you can stay where you are. if you want to move up in the job then take the job where the move is possible. smaller companies offer more freedome but it's like a dead end job really. i've done some merchandise planning before.
"im such a psychic junkie!" - me too! unfortunately, the ones i've seen were just mediocre or just not the real thing. if you have someone you can recomend that'd be great! i like the way they talk in abstract terms and nothing concrete
those are the ones who are good at reading body language and making good educated guesses based on it. but there are some "real" ones and those are the ones i'm trying to get to.lolz, see thats where my lifes becomes complicated, or not even complicated per se, its more like my upbringing. I was raised by a sag (i feel like i need to stress that), whos left me loving change. I once said it best to an ex, your stablity is not my stablity, my stablity in itself is instablity. Not saying im irrational and irresponsible, but more like im used to things being off. so when they arent i do enjoy those moments, but its still odd. I've lived my entire life with a woman whos so unstable, we consider her unstable habits stable. shes always broke and somehow always getting somewhere... i honestly have no idea how she owns property and has the ablity to travel so much.
The freedom at work is great, but yea it could be a dead end. the pays are equal, i recently have been doing research on the company who wants me just to find out their stock. so far every year they've been in production, they've doubled their profits. so it seems promising, i have til next monday to give them my answer, might see a psychic again.
Currently i know one psychic whos good, but shes very old and speaks only spanish. Otherwise i did some tarot cards at court the other night (vampyre guild my sisters into), it was fun and interesting (btw read the book psychic junkie to keep in check, lolz good book).
The freedom at work is great, but yea it could be a dead end. the pays are equal, i recently have been doing research on the company who wants me just to find out their stock. so far every year they've been in production, they've doubled their profits. so it seems promising, i have til next monday to give them my answer, might see a psychic again.
Currently i know one psychic whos good, but shes very old and speaks only spanish. Otherwise i did some tarot cards at court the other night (vampyre guild my sisters into), it was fun and interesting (btw read the book psychic junkie to keep in check, lolz good book).
i disappear for chunks of time and dont talk to anyone and just work and gym. it drives everyone crazy but i dont care
this is a great thread folks.
i find that for some reason, people are always coming to me for counsel. advice. and i'm always the soul of logic and sense. they often take my advice and it's usually the right direction. i am, however, often heedless of logic in my own decisions. much like some of you have confessed to. i dislike routine intensely. a rut is death. course, i'm aries sun, sag moon. my personal motto is "don't cage me, get outta my way." i can be so stubborn, obstinate and self focused. i will take the crazy risk EVERY time. guess that's why i ran off to china, sight unseen with my boyfriend at the time, no job, no nothing! we literally picked up and left everything. it's turned out well, i might add. we're married and stable and our financial picture is pleasing. but i know few people who would have done it. my stability involves risk, challenge and pressure. instability. i count on my cancer hubby to keep me safe!
and i too disappear for chunks of time. i need time to myself, to escape. i run off to thailand or singapore or london by myself and have adventures. people count on me too much to make them feel alive sometimes. i hear that ALL the time. i use my disappearances to recharge.
i find that for some reason, people are always coming to me for counsel. advice. and i'm always the soul of logic and sense. they often take my advice and it's usually the right direction. i am, however, often heedless of logic in my own decisions. much like some of you have confessed to. i dislike routine intensely. a rut is death. course, i'm aries sun, sag moon. my personal motto is "don't cage me, get outta my way." i can be so stubborn, obstinate and self focused. i will take the crazy risk EVERY time. guess that's why i ran off to china, sight unseen with my boyfriend at the time, no job, no nothing! we literally picked up and left everything. it's turned out well, i might add. we're married and stable and our financial picture is pleasing. but i know few people who would have done it. my stability involves risk, challenge and pressure. instability. i count on my cancer hubby to keep me safe!
and i too disappear for chunks of time. i need time to myself, to escape. i run off to thailand or singapore or london by myself and have adventures. people count on me too much to make them feel alive sometimes. i hear that ALL the time. i use my disappearances to recharge.
are you an aries redhedgurl? "i use my disappearances to recharge" as well but i don't just get up and go. i tell people i'll be away. being a source for constant listening demands and advices can be exausting. particularly when they ask you for an advice and then start argying with you about it.
it's great that you have a stable and reliable partner and it's romantic what you did. i could never do it with a cancer. i had one cancer bf and the worst experience ever.
it's great that you have a stable and reliable partner and it's romantic what you did. i could never do it with a cancer. i had one cancer bf and the worst experience ever.
phoenixblaze26 - from my experience go with a stable company because if you don't like it you can always find another job while having one. sometimes stability is a really nice thing. i'm craving it at this point of my life. too tired to run around and be in 5 places at the same time. not to say i can't do it
hey redgurl, omg its sooo funny how you said you just up and left to china. not saying i'd go that far, but i've totally be the person to wake up one morning and head out to PA. I once was in such a rut i literally called my best friend in pittsburgh and asked to come over... hes like 'when?', 'um tomorrow'. lucky for me i have great friends who totally enjoy my spontaneous side.
and yea i've learned cancer's arent to bad with change, as long as you hold their hands throughout the change and obviously ask them about it. keeping them informed is key.
and ariesgirl, i wanna stay at my current position (due to it being located in my fav part of the city), but change is always good. ever feel like you've over stayed in a location? this is one of my longest positions since college and its so odd to me.
and yea i've learned cancer's arent to bad with change, as long as you hold their hands throughout the change and obviously ask them about it. keeping them informed is key.
and ariesgirl, i wanna stay at my current position (due to it being located in my fav part of the city), but change is always good. ever feel like you've over stayed in a location? this is one of my longest positions since college and its so odd to me.
oh and side note to the beginning of my post. I love the scorpio board, only because the topics change up all the time. Granted their have been some great topics on here, but why does it always have to be on relationships?
Aries men - traditional mans man, fact. There is no more words to explain it, i havent met a aries man who has ever been very emotionally or emotionally up front about certain things. They are amazing and wonderful people and i've grown to become close friends to a lot of them. if there are any problems in the relationship, its usually not to hard to figure out.
Aries women - straight forward and aloof. the aries girls i've met have been very aloof, but i've noticed the older ones are very wise. i'd actually compare a lot of the elder aries women to the goddess Athena. i guess the aloof nature changed and created a much wiser woman, either way warrior women til the end. If anyone has a problem courting one its because ur not challenging her, and dont quit just because u have to work at it. Because in the end, you'll have a strong woman in ur life who will run your household a lot better than you'd think. again if they're any problems, its usually solved by being straight forward or acting caveman-ish. /just club her over the head, sometimes its great to be treated like the little woman.
again why cant we have more conversations on the mental anxieties or the decisions between right and wrong? Why are their no conversations on trial and error? Sometimes i just feel like the underdog, but i always keep on fighting. I think its the determination that makes aries people wonderful. i mean whats the point of living a life not worth living?
Aries men - traditional mans man, fact. There is no more words to explain it, i havent met a aries man who has ever been very emotionally or emotionally up front about certain things. They are amazing and wonderful people and i've grown to become close friends to a lot of them. if there are any problems in the relationship, its usually not to hard to figure out.
Aries women - straight forward and aloof. the aries girls i've met have been very aloof, but i've noticed the older ones are very wise. i'd actually compare a lot of the elder aries women to the goddess Athena. i guess the aloof nature changed and created a much wiser woman, either way warrior women til the end. If anyone has a problem courting one its because ur not challenging her, and dont quit just because u have to work at it. Because in the end, you'll have a strong woman in ur life who will run your household a lot better than you'd think. again if they're any problems, its usually solved by being straight forward or acting caveman-ish. /just club her over the head, sometimes its great to be treated like the little woman.
again why cant we have more conversations on the mental anxieties or the decisions between right and wrong? Why are their no conversations on trial and error? Sometimes i just feel like the underdog, but i always keep on fighting. I think its the determination that makes aries people wonderful. i mean whats the point of living a life not worth living?
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