How to deal with every sign when you don't want to

This topic was created in the Astrology forum by Sn1p3r187 on Monday, February 10, 2014 and has 10 replies.
Aries: Don't give them what they want and crazy stupid arguments with them. They will soon go away when they realize that it's not worth the time.
Taurus: Tar-tar sauce. Just like how Minotaurs are allergic to tar-tar sauce. If you want to scare away a Taurus, open up a jar of tar-tar sauce and the smell will be so bad they will run scared like a dog who heard a dog whistle. Make them eat it? Their bodies will explode in a fiery blaze that will kill you if you're anyway near them when they blow up in an explosion compared to Hiroshima.
Gemini: Ignore them, just that simple. Don't address their existence and they're sure to fall into a emo stupor like that emo fucktard Shinij Ikari from Neon Genesis Evangelion, whom I know is also a Gemini.
Cancer: Be cold and mean to them, their little hearts will break and they'll run away. Or if not, then use every crabs weakness. FIRE!!!!
Leo: DESTROY THEIR EGO!! Shoot them down every chance you get and make fun of them all the time, and on one part- be like Gemini. Just ignore them, or destroy them.\
Virgo: You know how they're all perfectionist and shit? Well, do everything backwards in front of them. Live underwear all over the floor, drink their beer, never flush their toilet, replace the milk with Mayo, come through with no swagger or fashion sense what so ever and they will flip, and use improper grammar, they will in same matter as Taurus will blow up in a matter similar to Hiroshima, get clear of the explosion.
Libra: Same matter as Gemini. You just have to get aggressive with them and punch them in the jaw and knock their ass out, they'll get the message when you get aggressive.
Scorpio: Well the keyterm for Scorpio is "control". So, it's simple in theory but in practice- Good Luck. For Both Scorpios they can control through sex, so for men if they're being a complete Steve. Women simple, kick them in the ballsack and punch them in them in throat. Make them get up and put on a maid costume and cook food. If they fuck it up spit it in their face and throw the plate at their head and say- "BITCH THIS CHICKEN TOO COLD". And go insanely wild to the point where the dude will be in fetal position crying over the dignity he lost. And for the women, since they like you to be rough bring the whips, paddles, gags, and chains. You have to get very creative with Scorp women. But in the end it will be too much fun, except I was on the receiving end and I was the one getting whipped. The scars still hurt
Sagittarius: They're flighty, so simply hold them down and try to control them and they will break off harder the Lebron's hairline.
Capricorn: Ah, we're so greedy and shit. Simple, someone wants to get rid of us. Shred money, burn it, waste it, flush it down the toilet do whatever with it and we will get so distraught at the financial idiocy that we will fall over and have a heart attack or stroke and we will die, or better yet- come through with shit more expensive then their's and we will be so jealous and distraught our killswitches activate. And explode afterwards, damn what is with Earth signs blowing up? Do we have some kind of killswitch that say we blow up when we die.
Aqaurius: Be intellectually dumb and ignore their attempts to open your eyes to their truth. They will realize they're wasting time with trying to preach to the converted. Or to more extreme measures, make them give and they pull out their Wakazashis and commit Hara Kiri and they blow afterwards from a delayed killswitch. Damn, now Air signs are exploding.
Pisces: Make them face logic and reality. As soon as they realize how bad it is they retract away into a corner, have a complete mental breakdown and soon a stroke. They also explode with their killswitches as well. Damn, every Earth sign, one water, and one air explodes when they die. I'm removing my killswitch.
Anyway, this is simply for jokes and do not take it seriously. I'm just poking at them. No need to get butthurt. Winking
Posted by CluelessCancer
Hahhahah this is true, except you forgot, water signs mirror.

Cancer: Be cold and mean to them, their little hearts will break and they'll run away. Or if not, then use every crabs weakness. FIRE!!!!

But Crabs taste good cooked. Possibly with a side of cream cheese and steamed in melted butter.
Posted by Sn1p3r187
Posted by CluelessCancer
Hahhahah this is true, except you forgot, water signs mirror.

Cancer: Be cold and mean to them, their little hearts will break and they'll run away. Or if not, then use every crabs weakness. FIRE!!!!

But Crabs taste good cooked. Possibly with a side of cream cheese and steamed in melted butter.
click to expand



crabs taste good either cooked or uncooked(=raw).. :9
Posted by xxixxi
Posted by Sn1p3r187
Posted by CluelessCancer
Hahhahah this is true, except you forgot, water signs mirror.

Cancer: Be cold and mean to them, their little hearts will break and they'll run away. Or if not, then use every crabs weakness. FIRE!!!!

But Crabs taste good cooked. Possibly with a side of cream cheese and steamed in melted butter.



crabs taste good either cooked or uncooked(=raw).. :9
click to expand

Well that is true. But uncooked meat is never good for ya. So, I cook mine as a precaution.
Posted by Sn1p3r187
Virgo: You know how they're all perfectionist and shit? Well, do everything backwards in front of them. Live underwear all over the floor, drink their beer, never flush their toilet, replace the milk with Mayo, come through with no swagger or fashion sense what so ever and they will flip, and use improper grammar, they will in same matter as Taurus will blow up in a matter similar to Hiroshima, get clear of the explosion.


Only thing that will annoy me on that list is the grammar. I could care less about swagger and fashion.
Posted by Damnata
Posted by Sn1p3r187
Virgo: You know how they're all perfectionist and shit? Well, do everything backwards in front of them. Live underwear all over the floor, drink their beer, never flush their toilet, replace the milk with Mayo, come through with no swagger or fashion sense what so ever and they will flip, and use improper grammar, they will in same matter as Taurus will blow up in a matter similar to Hiroshima, get clear of the explosion.


Only thing that will annoy me on that list is the grammar. I could care less about swagger and fashion.
click to expand


don't know if it's a virgo thing, but, i kind of like swagger, not so much fashion... but i'm highly annoyed with consistent "you're being used as your"
their - they're. *shakes fist* Noooo.....the english language is being raped.
In my mind, as I have English as my second language..how can native speakers confuse those?
Let me show you 3 articles I treasure..on other words being misinterpreted a lot.
www.cracked.com/blog/9-sound-alike-words-you-didnt-know-you-were-screwing-up/
http://www.cracked.com/blog/9-words-youre-confusing-with-other-words/

http://www.cracked.com/blog/8-words-internet-loves-to-confuse-with-other-words/
Posted by Damnata
In my mind, as I have English as my second language..how can native speakers confuse those?
Let me show you 3 articles I treasure..on other words being misinterpreted a lot.
www.cracked.com/blog/9-sound-alike-words-you-didnt-know-you-were-screwing-up/
http://www.cracked.com/blog/9-words-youre-confusing-with-other-words/

http://www.cracked.com/blog/8-words-internet-loves-to-confuse-with-other-words/

I believe I misspelled leave with live. But that was an example, harharharhar. lol
Sagittarius: They're flighty, so simply hold them down and try to control them and they will break off harder the Lebron's hairline.
you got that right!

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