Scorpio Mars - suffocated by saturn!

Hi

I am a Cap rising, Mars Scorpio, Saturn Scorpio, Taurus mercury Leo moon, Gem Sun, Gem venus.
I am extremely passionate due to my leon moon and mars scorpio.
However my cap rising I feel holds me back from expressing myself whole heartedly. As a result I regulariy bottle up, and explode internally.

I understand Saturnians relax as they grow with age (and from attaining their goals) however I'm now in my mid thirties am quite challenged by these positions.

I read through many sources that indivuduals with mars and saturn conjunct in scorpio are prone to feelings of defeatism . having my ascendent in cap I feel amplifies this.

I'd love to hear your opinion/experiences with any of the above

cheers 🙂

Exxtasyx thanks for opening up mate. Your stories inspiring means alot. cheers

Tauromale

Shadow manifestation and conscious expression!! funny you mention ed this..I just read about it the other day.
You've simplified it greatly here, thanks

My father also has leo moon with sag mars.
I feel he still needs to master his Leo moons need for approval and admiration.
He's very giving but overly expressive with my way or highway attitude. typical leo
i too crave more attention than most due to my leo, but again am held back by capricorn saying "attention, what for!!?"

I focus on his positive giving traits and practice self admiration, trying not to be dependant on others approval.
but it sure is a challenge.

I'm keen to know more above saturn and what allows it to relax. feeling secure and achieving goals...could that be on the right track?

thanks again

hey SDNA

very true...my leo is in the 9th house. that together with gem sun and gem venus....ive learnt the extreme hard way and still learning to not play myself.

if you don't mind...what are your experiences?

Hmm so because your rising is Capricorn, your Saturn is your dominant planet and hard aspects to your Saturn is not good?

I have mars conjunct Saturn too but my rising is Cancer.

I think you explode also because of your moon-mars square?

Rumil
very true with moon and mars squaring - you said the message is hidden?
not sure what you mean. I'm new to this site

Interesting SDNA, thanks for sharing
My mars is scorp mars is retrograde too in 11th house together with saturn.

interested to know what you mean by it turning direct later in life?

cheers

I am same year
nice, ill look into progressions.
I feel its loosened its grip in terms of my goals and work life. But social challenge of having cap rising with leo moon, square mars scorp is a work in progress.

quite serious socially....and anxious (my capricorn rising is at 0 degrees).

My recent ex is Cap rising, Saturn in the 1st house, Gem Sun and Venus. His Mars is rather positively aspected, though.

He got his first serious girlfriend when he was about your age, married her and had children in his forties. He accomplished everything he wanted in his forties and retired in his early fifties. I wouldn't say he ever relaxed though. He goes about his hobbies with the same drive he went after his business.

I, on the other hand, have Mars conjunct Saturn in Aries. My whole life was a string of high accomplishments followed by self-sabotage (professionally). I'm at the end of a self-sabotage period, which was largely spent serving others than my own interests. I have now Saturn transiting my first house and my career (and finances) become my focus once again.

@ exxtasyx

Being what you have been through and coming clean is an extraordinary accomplishment. I admire that about you, as well as the fact that you are very articulate and intelligent.

Your body and outlook...Do you have any idea how these will change over the next decades? How they will change, it's not 100% dependent on your will, but let's say.....about 70% is. Which is still the vast majority.

Hey Undine

thanks for sharing

self sabotage - I'm guessing due to Saturn in aries?
serving others than your own interests....pisces—

I too like your ex am determined with my work and hobbies having mars and suturn in scorpio in 11th house and cap rising.

But can understand serving others rather than self too due to my gemini sun, venus, mercury being in 6th house together with leo moon...Giving is a fantastic thing but serving others is different right!!? theres such a fine line between the two i feel.

Bwaaahaha

SDNA...i'll stick to just smoking weed

cheers