Scorpio Moon - trust issues

This topic was created in the Scorpio Moon forum by raad182 on Monday, January 30, 2017 and has 69 replies.
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Hey guys, its me again...


I've created a few topics regarding my relationship problems.


Now my girl wants to join a gym. I dont know how it is where you live but here the guys hit on the girls in the gym and they dont care if she is single, engaged or married. The point is, I know that she wont automatically cheat on me by just joining a gym, she could does this elsewhere but Im really not comfortable with the idea of other guys around her, she in tight clothes, small talking with random dudes and etc.



On the other side, I care for her health, astrologically speaking she has Moon conj Mars what would make one feel good about being physically active.


Should I just let this girl live her life, broke up and try to find a cure for my trust issues or should I just try to convince her to not join the gym?


She said that she wants but If im not comfortable with it, she wouldnt.


Sorry for this thread...I just wanted to hear different opinions
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Get a membership and go with her.
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I'm a Scorpio moon, so I too can be insane, some days but and maybe I've missed some other threads, but what has she done to make you so suspicious? If ppl hit on her, feel good about the fact that she's so hot and chose you. Speaking for me, I have to work at not carrying my past into my future, especially with trust.
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Im serious, im really thinking about broke up with her...Its not fair to just say " Hey, you cant have a life because I want it this way "


I can't go to the gym with her because her home is a bit far, to go there pick her, go to the gym and then go home.


Im not blaming my placements, I know that there are scorpio moons who are okay about trust in people but astrologically speaking (as we are in a astrology forum) I think that people with this placement would understand my feeling better.


I really love her but I dont know if I can just let her go...I would get crazy


I think its better breakup and let her in peace...She will find someone better
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Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
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OP are you an Aries sun?
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Now Im starting to know what the Moon opposite Venus in my natal chart means :/
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Posted by MyStarsShine
OP are you an Aries sun?
Yes...the wannabe superhero
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Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


click to expand
She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
details
Posted by raad182
Now Im starting to know what the Moon opposite Venus in my natal chart means :/
My moon and venus are opposite, the struggle is real, not as real as the ppl with squares but I get it. But there is a balance with us. I wonder what's going on that's making you feel insecure about this relationship and setting your trust issues off? What are her placements?
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Posted by raad182
Posted by MyStarsShine
OP are you an Aries sun?
Yes...the wannabe superhero
click to expand
I was with a guy that had this combo.....he was very possessive to the point of being stifling at times

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Posted by TaurusinTexas
Posted by raad182
Now Im starting to know what the Moon opposite Venus in my natal chart means :/
My moon and venus are opposite, the struggle is real, not as real as the ppl with squares but I get it. But there is a balance with us. I wonder what's going on that's making you feel insecure about this relationship and setting your trust issues off? What are her placements?
click to expand
Wow, someone understand me...And people say that its not a matter of Astrology...


Its not about this relationship especifically, im just like that...I feel that I cant fully trust my shadow.


Cancer Sun/Gemini Moon/Pisces Rising/Taurus Venus/Gemini Mars
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Personally, I'd be very flattered if someone hit on my girlfriend. Especially if she's never given me a reason to not trust her.


Posted by raad182
Im serious, im really thinking about broke up with her...Its not fair to just say " Hey, you cant have a life because I want it this way "


I can't go to the gym with her because her home is a bit far, to go there pick her, go to the gym and then go home.


Im not blaming my placements, I know that there are scorpio moons who are okay about trust in people but astrologically speaking (as we are in a astrology forum) I think that people with this placement would understand my feeling better.


I really love her but I dont know if I can just let her go...I would get crazy


I think its better breakup and let her in peace...She will find someone better
Looks to me like you haven't learned to compromise.


This is a point in your life when you will have to consider which is better, letting go of the control and being with someone you love and trust, or maintaining control and losing them.


At this point it seems like you are unwilling to give up that control, unwilling to learn to trust her. Unwilling to compromise.


You have to understand that you simply cannot control people, how they feel about you, what they say or do to you. Or say or do without you.


You can only control what you feel, how you react and/or how you deal with it.


I agree with @Unwording - this is definitely a control issue, not really about trust.


If you feel that you cannot compromise, then perhaps it would be a good idea to let her go.


If something like signing up for a gym membership can set off your paranoia and control issues, then maybe you're not ready for a relationship - not with her, and not with anyone else. Until you learn to deal with yourself.


I dread to think what you're like if she goes to the movies or to dinner with her friends, without you.
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Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




click to expand
Its obvious... " trust issues "
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




Its obvious... " trust issues "
click to expand
The trust issue is only a mask.


The control issue is the actual problem.
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The only person you need to trust is her.


No matter where she is someone could come unto her, the grocery store, work, the doctors office...etc. But if she is trustworthy and loyal she won't entertain any of these advances. The biggest mistake you can make would be to start to control where she can and can't go because of your insecurity. Eventually she will start to resent you and could decide to cheat out of spite.


Give her freedom. Give her your trust. In doing so she will love you more for it and be steadfast and loyal.
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Posted by blackphase
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




Its obvious... " trust issues "
The trust issue is only a mask.


The control issue is the actual problem.
So people with control issues do not actually have trust issues at all?

What qualifies as a trust issue then?
click to expand
Control issues are more complex and difficult to resolve (deep seated, tied with the ego, self-perception blah blah blah)


Trust issues are usually based on personal experiences, and just IMO, easier to resolve. You can have a lot of trust issues, and be broken, but you can see where you're broken and you can work towards mending it.


Control issues, however, the subject often may not even realise he/she is being controlling because it feels natural/normal. E.g To throw a tantrum because they have to work late in the office. You want everything your way, because you feel that is the right way and any other way is not good or not right.


Quite often both trust and control issues go hand in hand, but in OP's case, the root cause is not his trust issues. It's his control issues. He has displayed this very obviously in many of his threads.
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Thank you guys, all of you who give you sincere opinion.


Im feeling really sad now but as most of you said, its my problem and I cant blame her, im not ready for a relationship, its not healthy.


I will let her go, live her life, meet some " normal " guy who will make she happy.


Its better for me to stay alone as I cant trust/control anyone.


Thanks again
details
Posted by blackphase
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




Its obvious... " trust issues "
The trust issue is only a mask.


The control issue is the actual problem.
So people with control issues do not actually have trust issues at all?

What qualifies as a trust issue then?


Just curious as I always felt I struggled with both, trust and control.. How do you differentiate between the two?
click to expand
I have less of a problem with trust issues than I do with control issues. It took me a very long time to deal with my control issues.


As an Aries sun I have very few problems trusting people, but with a Scorpio moon the control issues were a major barrier for me.
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Posted by Ram416
Posted by blackphase
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




Its obvious... " trust issues "
The trust issue is only a mask.


The control issue is the actual problem.
So people with control issues do not actually have trust issues at all?

What qualifies as a trust issue then?
Control issues are more complex and difficult to resolve (deep seated, tied with the ego, self-perception blah blah blah)


Trust issues are usually based on personal experiences, and just IMO, easier to resolve. You can have a lot of trust issues, and be broken, but you can see where you're broken and you can work towards mending it.


Control issues, however, the subject often may not even realise he/she is being controlling because it feels natural/normal. E.g To throw a tantrum because they have to work late in the office. You want everything your way, because you feel that is the right way and any other way is not good or not right.


Quite often both trust and control issues go hand in hand, but in OP's case, the root cause is not his trust issues. It's his control issues. He has displayed this very obviously in many of his threads.
click to expand
You're right Ram...Im feeling like the truth is slapping my face really hard right now...


Today I learned the meaning of two placements on Astrology...

Moon opp Venus

Saturn transit through the 7th house
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Posted by raad182
Thank you guys, all of you who give you sincere opinion.


Im feeling really sad now but as most of you said, its my problem and I cant blame her, im not ready for a relationship, its not healthy.


I will let her go, live her life, meet some " normal " guy who will make she happy.


Its better for me to stay alone as I cant trust/control anyone.


Thanks again
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.


There is nothing wrong with you.


You're still a work-in-progress, like every one of us here.
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Posted by raad182
Posted by TaurusinTexas
Posted by raad182
Now Im starting to know what the Moon opposite Venus in my natal chart means :/
My moon and venus are opposite, the struggle is real, not as real as the ppl with squares but I get it. But there is a balance with us. I wonder what's going on that's making you feel insecure about this relationship and setting your trust issues off? What are her placements?
Wow, someone understand me...And people say that its not a matter of Astrology...


Its not about this relationship especifically, im just like that...I feel that I cant fully trust my shadow.


Cancer Sun/Gemini Moon/Pisces Rising/Taurus Venus/Gemini Mars
click to expand
I'm torn here, I've had instances in my life that, I couldn't shake the not trusting issue and I was right in the end, like crazy little things set me off but ultimately it was because he was cheating and my intuition was going off and I wasn't in tune with it. So I wonder if you really believe that she's innocent and doesn't see that ppl are hitting on her? But I'm also just guessing here.


The other side is, if this is a perpetual deal with you, then you have to find the balance and peace within yourself because this will destroy every relationship. Maybe you need to physically write down what's truth and what's fantasy that your over active mind ran with, so you can see it and know your overreacting?


Like I said, I'm torn because I've lived both sides.
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Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Thank you guys, all of you who give you sincere opinion.


Im feeling really sad now but as most of you said, its my problem and I cant blame her, im not ready for a relationship, its not healthy.


I will let her go, live her life, meet some " normal " guy who will make she happy.


Its better for me to stay alone as I cant trust/control anyone.


Thanks again
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.


There is nothing wrong with you.


You're still a work-in-progress, like every one of us here.
click to expand
Im not feeling sorry, im trying to be mature and see the truth about me and my flaws.


My natal chart just shows what I've been thinking my whole life, im born to be alone.


Venus in the 12th

Moon opp Venus

Aries sun


Its like life screaming " You need to be alone mdfkrrrr "
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Most of the flaws are related to maturity at some point.


I've been a lone wolf most part of my life because I cant trust people.


I've tried to let my guard down and trust people but most of the times they betrayed me. I dont know if I attract this or If Im too emotional but I feel in peace when Im alone. Its like astrologers say, with Venus in the 12th you feel loved but some kind of superior power, you feel loved by God for some reason and thats the way I feel when im walking around alone but of course, nobody can walk through life totally alone.

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What could help me with these issues?


meditation?drugs?psychologist?travel?
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Posted by PootyButt
What this is really about is insecurity. You fear that if some guy hits on her, she'll like him more than she likes you, and she'll embarrass you or cheat on you or even leave you. The problem isn't her. You'll take this with you through every relationship if you don't come to terms with why you're so insecure. Why don't you believe that you could be good enough for her to be faithful to you?
Maybe you're right too...


I always think that im not pretty enough, succesful enough, cool enough, fun enough, intelligent enough...Not only about her but with everyone. I've always been looking for people's validations but its seems that people feel that and avoid to give me the validation. Even when I know that im good enough, I need people to validate that and they often refuse to do so, even when its obvious. Sounds imature but its just how it is
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Posted by cheekyfaerie
You've probably blocked me by now, but realizing you're your own worst enemy is a great first step to countering that. Realizing that thinking the worst of people is the best way to actually bring out the worst in people is a huge eye opener.


Communication is key.
At one point I thought he blocked me too lol.
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W o w
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Posted by raad182
Posted by PootyButt
What this is really about is insecurity. You fear that if some guy hits on her, she'll like him more than she likes you, and she'll embarrass you or cheat on you or even leave you. The problem isn't her. You'll take this with you through every relationship if you don't come to terms with why you're so insecure. Why don't you believe that you could be good enough for her to be faithful to you?
Maybe you're right too...


I always think that im not pretty enough, succesful enough, cool enough, fun enough, intelligent enough...Not only about her but with everyone. I've always been looking for people's validations but its seems that people feel that and avoid to give me the validation. Even when I know that im good enough, I need people to validate that and they often refuse to do so, even when its obvious. Sounds imature but its just how it is
click to expand
I get what you're saying here...


I'd just like to address your comments about self-validation or validation from others.


I grew up in an abusive household with a physically violent step-father and a mother who never protected me. It was always the other way around, I was the mom trying my best to protect her. I never understood as a child why my "step-dad" didn't love or accept me, and I was shipped off to multiple foster homes in my childhood. (which my mother stood by and allowed to happen)


Anyway... the point here, is that I've always sought validation from men which, has led me into bad relationships. That was something I came to terms with while in therapy. Could actually be the reason why I chose to be celibate for 7 years after my divorce 9 years ago. I took that time to focus on myself and being the best mom I could be for my son.


You don't need to be validated by people. You need to value what's good in your life and choose people who value you for who you are. I'm not talking about love interests. I'm talking about your circle of people.


I would suggest that you soul search, get some counseling, and address the real reasons why you depend on others for your own personal happiness.





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Posted by Walkergrl
Posted by raad182
Posted by PootyButt
What this is really about is insecurity. You fear that if some guy hits on her, she'll like him more than she likes you, and she'll embarrass you or cheat on you or even leave you. The problem isn't her. You'll take this with you through every relationship if you don't come to terms with why you're so insecure. Why don't you believe that you could be good enough for her to be faithful to you?
Maybe you're right too...


I always think that im not pretty enough, succesful enough, cool enough, fun enough, intelligent enough...Not only about her but with everyone. I've always been looking for people's validations but its seems that people feel that and avoid to give me the validation. Even when I know that im good enough, I need people to validate that and they often refuse to do so, even when its obvious. Sounds imature but its just how it is
I get what you're saying here...


I'd just like to address your comments about self-validation or validation from others.


I grew up in an abusive household with a physically violent step-father and a mother who never protected me. It was always the other way around, I was the mom trying my best to protect her. I never understood as a child why my "step-dad" didn't love or accept me, and I was shipped off to multiple foster homes in my childhood. (which my mother stood by and allowed to happen)


Anyway... the point here, is that I've always sought validation from men which, has led me into bad relationships. That was something I came to terms with while in therapy. Could actually be the reason why I chose to be celibate for 7 years after my divorce 9 years ago. I took that time to focus on myself and being the best mom I could be for my son.


You don't need to be validated by people. You need to value what's good in your life and choose people who value you for who you are. I'm not talking about love interests. I'm talking about your circle of people.


I would suggest that you soul search, get some counseling, and address the real reasons why you depend on others for your own personal happiness.





click to expand
Thanks, I was raised in a similar condition.


Step father hated me, stepmother the same...Both of my parents were passive and I have to learn how stand for myself, it was a hard lesson but astrologically speaking I guess this is the point of hard aspects like squares and oppositions, its about getting stronger.


I have a Scorpio moon (the weakest) and its really challenged by hard aspects...A lot of times I thought about surrender and just hit the ESC button but I still here, stronger and I know life will keep pushing me to become stronger.


" Life wont give you more than you can handle "
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Walkergrl
Posted by raad182
Posted by PootyButt
What this is really about is insecurity. You fear that if some guy hits on her, she'll like him more than she likes you, and she'll embarrass you or cheat on you or even leave you. The problem isn't her. You'll take this with you through every relationship if you don't come to terms with why you're so insecure. Why don't you believe that you could be good enough for her to be faithful to you?
Maybe you're right too...


I always think that im not pretty enough, succesful enough, cool enough, fun enough, intelligent enough...Not only about her but with everyone. I've always been looking for people's validations but its seems that people feel that and avoid to give me the validation. Even when I know that im good enough, I need people to validate that and they often refuse to do so, even when its obvious. Sounds imature but its just how it is
I get what you're saying here...


I'd just like to address your comments about self-validation or validation from others.


I grew up in an abusive household with a physically violent step-father and a mother who never protected me. It was always the other way around, I was the mom trying my best to protect her. I never understood as a child why my "step-dad" didn't love or accept me, and I was shipped off to multiple foster homes in my childhood. (which my mother stood by and allowed to happen)


Anyway... the point here, is that I've always sought validation from men which, has led me into bad relationships. That was something I came to terms with while in therapy. Could actually be the reason why I chose to be celibate for 7 years after my divorce 9 years ago. I took that time to focus on myself and being the best mom I could be for my son.


You don't need to be validated by people. You need to value what's good in your life and choose people who value you for who you are. I'm not talking about love interests. I'm talking about your circle of people.


I would suggest that you soul search, get some counseling, and address the real reasons why you depend on others for your own personal happiness.





Thanks, I was raised in a similar condition.


Step father hated me, stepmother the same...Both of my parents were passive and I have to learn how stand for myself, it was a hard lesson but astrologically speaking I guess this is the point of hard aspects like squares and oppositions, its about getting stronger.


I have a Scorpio moon (the weakest) and its really challenged by hard aspects...A lot of times I thought about surrender and just hit the ESC button but I still here, stronger and I know life will keep pushing me to become stronger.


" Life wont give you more than you can handle "
click to expand
Surround yourself with people who love and value you for who you are. And please, get some counseling.


"To thine own self, be true."

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Posted by CanthalTilt
I bet @Teena goes to the gym and talks to all the dudes
Lol!! I actually did think about saying that in this thread. I do talk to guys in the gym. I made a Scorpio friend there. Two weeks after we started talking, he asked me to stop talking to the other guys or stop going to the gym(Really? How did he assume he owned me?)He has no reason to be insecure to start with. He's the hottest of all n stuff. N to not trust me is stupid coz I don't just fall for guys...not even him Tongue
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Posted by PootyButt
Posted by CanthalTilt
I bet @Teena goes to the gym and talks to all the dudes
What is this desperate bullying thing you're doing? Why must I keep seeing it?
click to expand
He's obsessed with me babe ...love it is?
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Posted by Ram416
Posted by blackphase
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
So you're afraid she might meet or fall for another guy.

You don't trust her.




Its obvious... " trust issues "
The trust issue is only a mask.


The control issue is the actual problem.
So people with control issues do not actually have trust issues at all?

What qualifies as a trust issue then?


Just curious as I always felt I struggled with both, trust and control.. How do you differentiate between the two?
I have less of a problem with trust issues than I do with control issues. It took me a very long time to deal with my control issues.


As an Aries sun I have very few problems trusting people, but with a Scorpio moon the control issues were a major barrier for me.
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can you help the @OP then - for gods sake this poor soul just runs away rather than deal with his issues - I just can't imagine that poor girl who he lets go because he has a problem and although he needs to work on that it will take time and much effort ...


I can see that trust and/or control in situations go hand in hand - he is trying to control her world so she isn't ever tempted but not realizing this is a fact of life and it's how you handle it - the incoming temptations - because they are and will be out there - I just ignore men who google me and want to talk to me and go on about my business and my man understands me because he knows I do not like the attention because he's been out with me and sees how I handle it

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Posted by PootyButt
Posted by Teena
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by CanthalTilt
I bet @Teena goes to the gym and talks to all the dudes
What is this desperate bullying thing you're doing? Why must I keep seeing it?
He's obsessed with me babe ...love it is?
Well, you are a cutie, but so is he. Move on, Ands!
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Yes!! Move on @CanthalTilt n nah...not adding any pages!! I like raad .. Can't do that to him!!
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Posted by CanthalTilt
Posted by Teena
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by Teena
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by CanthalTilt
I bet @Teena goes to the gym and talks to all the dudes
What is this desperate bullying thing you're doing? Why must I keep seeing it?
He's obsessed with me babe ...love it is?
Well, you are a cutie, but so is he. Move on, Ands!
Yes!! Move on @CanthalTilt n nah...not adding any pages!! I like raad .. Can't do that to him!!
I have moved on bye
click to expand
Ouch!!!!

?

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I think this is just him struggling with change, change can induce fear, fear of the unknown and the unwanted, fearing the worst of the worst. If your girl is going to cheat, she will cheat, whether it's at a gym or a local park.


Take a step back and check your feelings and see what is really bothering you. Go to the gym and workout together. Either way, don't try to control someone bc of your own fears and insecurities. You want her to be mentally strong and confident in herself. Don't be that guy to say "should I let her", you're not her keeper, you don't own her.


I go to the gym, I have been hit on, its obvious I don't want to talk. I'm there to workout.
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I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
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Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
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Posted by Teena
Posted by CanthalTilt
Posted by Teena
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by Teena
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by CanthalTilt
I bet @Teena goes to the gym and talks to all the dudes
What is this desperate bullying thing you're doing? Why must I keep seeing it?
He's obsessed with me babe ...love it is?
Well, you are a cutie, but so is he. Move on, Ands!
Yes!! Move on @CanthalTilt n nah...not adding any pages!! I like raad .. Can't do that to him!!
I have moved on bye
Ouch!!!!

?

click to expand
That Scorpio - Taurus connection.


*hears wedding bells*
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
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Because sometimes you have fail, after trying, to understand what winning really means to you.

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Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
click to expand
....
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Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
Because sometimes you have fail to really understand what winning really means to you.

click to expand
Now thats different...Im not afraid to fail, I really love taking the risks.


But get into something that I have zero chance of winning?! I guess that nobody would have any motivation to do so. Unless its something for fun, of course.
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You're trying, but you're also planning to quit because you don't think you can win this one.


Quitters never win because they never learn the whole process.


Failures eventually win as long as they keep trying, regardless of how much shit gets thrown at them. Because they learn from their mistakes and they experience the whole process.
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Posted by Damnata
Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
....
click to expand


" Hey dude, lets play the finals on Sunday...We will lose for sure, do want to drive for 5 hours for that? "


" Sure, I would love to know how does it feel to lose "
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
Because sometimes you have fail to really understand what winning really means to you.

Now thats different...Im not afraid to fail, I really love taking the risks.


But get into something that I have zero chance of winning?! I guess that nobody would have any motivation to do so. Unless its something for fun, of course.
click to expand
Unfortunately you don't seem to want to take the risk with your gf.


It's your insecurities and controlling nature telling you that you can't win this one.


Because winning this battle would mean you'd have to let go of your nasty habits and learn to compromise.
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
Posted by raad182
Posted by Skye
I don't know your story.


News flash: there are men everywhere lol. Are you going to accompany

her to the gas station, the grocery store, the mall, etc. ? You're being ridiculous

and she's free to talk to whoever she wants!



I dont mind and I know there are guys everywhere...


but in the gym, there are the same people, at the same time, almost everyday...And its like, the guys will see her on a daily basis, will try to know her, try to become her friend and etc...She is kinda of ingenuous and dont catch second intentions, So im afraid of guys trying to manipulate her etc...
Manipulate her into doing what?

How old is she?

Give me an example of what you think might happen.


She is an adult but kinda innocent...


For example, lets say there is a dude that find her attractive, he will keep around, small talking and stuff like that...One day we will have fight (what is normal for every couple) she comes to the gym sad, this dude comes " Hey, whats happening..."


I guess you got the picture...I've seen that happening with friends.
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That kind of situation would have nothing to do


with naivety, and everything to do with her


being petty, shallow, and a little skanky.


You sure you're not just looking for an excuse


to break up with her?


Straight Face




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Posted by Ram416
You're trying, but you're also planning to quit because you don't think you can win this one.


Quitters never win because they never learn the whole process.


Failures eventually win as long as they keep trying, regardless of how much shit gets thrown at them. Because they learn from their mistakes and they experience the whole process.
I totally agree with you but when I already know where I could fail and " quit " to work on that, to fight another day...I think this is the correct attitude.


You don't need to break your leg to know how that hurts.
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Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
....


" Hey dude, lets play the finals on Sunday...We will lose for sure, do want to drive for 5 hours for that? "


" Sure, I would love to know how does it feel to lose "
click to expand
This is an Aries moon who played, and lost, a soccer match early last year.


"We didn't stand a chance at winning, we are playing people who have years of experience and train other teams. But at least we tried. And at least now I know we can work well as a team."


I swear sometimes Aries moons have more balls than the suns.

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Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Ram416
Posted by raad182
Posted by Damnata
I think you should just give up.


#AriesGoals #ZeroDrive #WhyEvenTry #Can'tWinI'mOut


What a waste of an exalted Sun.
Does it look like im not trying? Seriously?


And yes, If I cant win...Im out...Why bother?!
Because sometimes you have fail to really understand what winning really means to you.

Now thats different...Im not afraid to fail, I really love taking the risks.


But get into something that I have zero chance of winning?! I guess that nobody would have any motivation to do so. Unless its something for fun, of course.
Unfortunately you don't seem to want to take the risk with your gf.


It's your insecurities and controlling nature telling you that you can't win this one.


Because winning this battle would mean you'd have to let go of your nasty habits and learn to compromise.
click to expand
Im really ashamed but you're making sense here...
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