Any water signs feel like they could literally die going too long without love?

This topic was created in the Cancer forum by WaterDevil on Thursday, September 21, 2017 and has 6 replies.
I am hurting right now immensely so I'm reaching out.

Its been a while since Iv posted about my self loathing, but here it goes.

I was speaking with one of my very good friends this morning. And Iv come to a conclusion that I feel like I won't survive without romantic love in my life. Im "a catch" I guess, meaning I have a lot going for me, so my problem isn't finding "just anyone" to sleep with, or whatever, but the mere fact that I have no one to be mutually in love with that is killing me inside. I feel so lost. I work out almost everyday, and have skipped this entire week due to my depression of "things not working out".. at least to my favor I mean.

When push comes to shove, it's not even the rejection that hurts, it's the fact that the person in question just couldn't fulfill my emotional and intellectual needs. And Ill try to compromise if they seem genuine, but in the end of the day it just isn't a match, and I find my self depressed, pessimistic, and out of touch with humanity all over again. Ever since my recent disappointments, once I reach that entire "Im checking out of this person, back to square one" point. That's when the dark thoughts happen. The adrenaline I once had with someone who seemed like they had potential has faded. My endorphin none existent, and my dopamine out of whack. Finding my self wanting to leave this earth, not due to a person, but this darkness that is so difficult to live with. This happens Even when I reject someone that I once thought could be "the one". When it doesn't work out. Either way shape or form. I feel like I could die at any moment. No matter who was "at fault". The darkness always returns. I just don't feel whole.
But aren't you polyamourous? So looking at one person to fulfill all your needs is counterproductive and honestly unrealistic.
Relying on someone else to make you feel whole isn't healthy. Be at peace with yourself.
Posted by LadyNeptune
But aren't you polyamourous? So looking at one person to fulfill all your needs is counterproductive and honestly unrealistic.
I am polyamorous. But Im still "single". Poly just means Im open to loving more than one person at a time. And dating multiple people if opportunity presents it self. But it doesn't change the fact that Im currently not MUTUALLY in love with anyone. Not Even the pisces. Im in love with her, she loves me. But we arn't IN LOVE/TOGETHER get it. Shes kind of the same sort of polyamorous as I. Its a mindset combined with communication. For example, before I started seeing the libra I was open with her about my dating other people and potentially having different lovers. Still, Im lacking "love" right now. And it's causing me depression today. Yes being poly helps a watery water sign like me, "spreading the love" and all. But when there is no longer love to spread, and i check out, than I CHECK OUT. Does that make sense?
Posted by LadyNeptune
Relying on someone else to make you feel whole isn't healthy. Be at peace with yourself.
I think you are missing the point. I am at peace with my self.. its when things turn sour the darkness hits. And within a month, sometimes days depending, I feel whole again. Its a temporary pain. But agonizing when it happens. For example, I was over my ex girlfriend 3 months before she moved out (we were together for 4 years). But when she left I didn't feel excited for the horizons (considering she was toxic I should have). I felt extreme depression for no longer having someone to love who loves me in return. Not even a month later I was okay with being alone again. It's like a fucked up dance that happens every time no matter how secure i am with my self. Its a temporary loathing of humanity driven depression and yes, feeling like I could actually die without love.
Posted by LadyNeptune
But aren't you polyamourous? So looking at one person to fulfill all your needs is counterproductive and honestly unrealistic.
And I can be in love with more than one person at once, just throwing it out there. Just right now, I love someone who doesnt "love" me back. And feeling disappointment from the NRE I was getting from the libra that very quickly faded.

Leave Your Feedback

We'd love to hear your thoughts! If you're not logged in, you can still share your feedback below. Your input helps us improve the experience for everyone. To post your own content or join the conversation, please log in or create an account.