Aren't Cancer men supposed to be affectionate?
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by lynn1329 on Tuesday, April 9, 2013 and has 8 replies.
I??ve been in a relationship with a Cancer man for 6 months. I??m concerned that we aren??t where we should be as far as affection is concerned. I??ve read that Cancer Men are like a breath of fresh air when in love, super romantic and affectionate. He will do cute things like put my dishes away and take out my trash when I??m not looking and always opens doors, kisses my hand, moves me out of the way of any kind of imposing danger etc??_ So I do feel like he cares for me, but he rarely tries to kiss me (Just a quick kiss when he does), never wants to cuddle, and doesn??t have a very high sex drive. He says he loves me, says sweet things all the time, sings songs to me, but for the most part it stops there. We do have sex, but it??s only 1-2 times a week and he??s not as affectionate as what I read Cancer men usually are. The other night I said, probably too harshly that I felt more like a friend to him than his girlfriend. He said he had no idea that I felt this way and didn't really acknowledge it as a problem. For the weekend he acted a little more affectionate, but I didn??t hear from him the following Monday at all. No calls, nothing. I??ve been carrying us a lot financially as far as dates etc??_ are concerned. I've also been giving him gas money to get to my place and interviews etc... I??m trying really hard to support him emotionally as well as I know how hard this must be for him. I send him cute messages, email him songs we share together etc??_ with loving messages. I usually call him often to be there for him, but as he??s not very affectionate I've stopped. I usually don't give this much, but I've read that Cancer men need that. I'm Just trying a new avenue to try to get him to open up. The low passion is driving me away from him. Everything is wonderful except the affection. Also, he is VERY flirty (always has been) in public with other women. He fishes for compliments from them, but not so much with me. Is this normal Cancer man behavior? I give him compliments all the time but he seems to shrug them off now. Should I stop calling him as much? Let him chase for a while to wake him back up? Should I not spend so much money on him even though he??s going through a lot right now? Also I??ll add that he is at my place A LOT. 5-6 days a week, can barely get him away so he seems obviously very interested. I'm just concerned on what level. I like affection and cuddling and maybe he just doesn't?
Hi,
I??ve been surrounded by cancer males. I??m best friends with one. Your cancer is pretty much staying very true to his sign from what it sounds like??_ They are homebodies, and apparently he feels that your home is his home along with everything else, because YOU set the stage that way. The woman sets the scene for how things will be from the very beginning, the man brings things to the table she either accepts or tell him it??s not enough try again. If he wants her he comes back, if not he??ll search for a woman that will accept either less or whatever it is he??s bringing.
In your case, he sounds affectionate. I know how you feel though. I??m currently dating a cancer and he has this brick wall up emotionally, but after reading about them I know why. They are soft as mush on the inside and scared to death if they open to the wrong person how long it will take them to heal from someone that didn??t deserve to see that side of them in the first place. I don??t think it was harsh of you to let him know how you feel, communication is key in any relationship no matter the sign. If he??s acting like its not a problem, then it??s probably because you brought it up and let it go. His time to fix is up, otherwise you would??nt have made the post.lol. Have you tried initiating the touches and more sex. By me being a Libra I??m very slow and come off extremely cool mannered in this department unless I??m 100% sure it??s desired or wanted by the other person, or unless I can predict to some extent how their reaction will be. If I have no idea how they will react, it??s pretty much a lost cause with me. Lol. (I should probably learn to take more chance huh)???maybe later. Lol. But shoot, if you want him try setting the scene the next time he??s over. Run his bath, come out massage his shoulders, play soft music, FEED HIM (they love to eat), and then drop the rob. He should be all over you, if not then we have much bigger problems O_0
I??ve been surrounded by cancer males. I??m best friends with one. Your cancer is pretty much staying very true to his sign from what it sounds like??_ They are homebodies, and apparently he feels that your home is his home along with everything else, because YOU set the stage that way. The woman sets the scene for how things will be from the very beginning, the man brings things to the table she either accepts or tell him it??s not enough try again. If he wants her he comes back, if not he??ll search for a woman that will accept either less or whatever it is he??s bringing.
In your case, he sounds affectionate. I know how you feel though. I??m currently dating a cancer and he has this brick wall up emotionally, but after reading about them I know why. They are soft as mush on the inside and scared to death if they open to the wrong person how long it will take them to heal from someone that didn??t deserve to see that side of them in the first place. I don??t think it was harsh of you to let him know how you feel, communication is key in any relationship no matter the sign. If he??s acting like its not a problem, then it??s probably because you brought it up and let it go. His time to fix is up, otherwise you would??nt have made the post.lol. Have you tried initiating the touches and more sex. By me being a Libra I??m very slow and come off extremely cool mannered in this department unless I??m 100% sure it??s desired or wanted by the other person, or unless I can predict to some extent how their reaction will be. If I have no idea how they will react, it??s pretty much a lost cause with me. Lol. (I should probably learn to take more chance huh)???maybe later. Lol. But shoot, if you want him try setting the scene the next time he??s over. Run his bath, come out massage his shoulders, play soft music, FEED HIM (they love to eat), and then drop the rob. He should be all over you, if not then we have much bigger problems O_0
I am in a relationship with a Cancer man. He is extremely affectionate. Very interested in everything I do. Wants to be with me all the time. He is handsome and women always try to flirt with him and he will deliberately pull me close or kiss me in front of them to show them that he is mine. I love that about him. He would never deliberately do anything to hurt me. I think if those things changed, I would think he had lost interest. I would not accept less than his loving treatment of me. If I had to support him for a while, I would. But I would expect that he would take care of me also in the future. We will be married at the end of this year. He is insisting on marriage. It is both our second marriage. We know what being with unappreciative partners is like. I can FEEL the love from him. When he talks to me its like a cocoon of warmth (corny, I know). Don't take any less than a man's all (not talking money here). If you feel it isnt right, then trust your instincts.
Posted by BikerCh1ck
Oh.. I am so happy for you THLadySagittarius. You are a lucky girl!
Thanx BIkerCh1ck!
@op your man is just bummed out because he is doing poorly financially. Poverty is always a fear amongst cancers. We want security. Financial uncertainty is a libido killer. That's why cancers excel at porn. Financial security and we get to be filthy.
Ive been with my Cancer for about the same length of time that you two have been together.
Yes. The affectionate side of him isnt as pronounced because he has you now and I guess men feel like they dont have to impress you as much... But hes still affectionate. He always falls asleep holding me, no matter what. He always wants to cuddle. If we have a spat we always solve it before bed and we always go to bed in each others arms.
Talk to him about it in a calm, rational, logical, and neutral manner. Tell him this and this makes me feel unwanted, or whatever. He will understand. Going tit for tat never works, youll just start a war so dont do it. If you guys talk he will try to improve if he loves you.
Yes. The affectionate side of him isnt as pronounced because he has you now and I guess men feel like they dont have to impress you as much... But hes still affectionate. He always falls asleep holding me, no matter what. He always wants to cuddle. If we have a spat we always solve it before bed and we always go to bed in each others arms.
Talk to him about it in a calm, rational, logical, and neutral manner. Tell him this and this makes me feel unwanted, or whatever. He will understand. Going tit for tat never works, youll just start a war so dont do it. If you guys talk he will try to improve if he loves you.
Sometimes feeling neglected can be more of a "me" thing more than a "him" thing. Look inside yourself, find out what is missing, what is wrong, what you need, and if there is a way for you to get over it yourself.. We women are emotional creatures, once something sets us off we become so narrow minded... No, look around. What can you do? And when youre done with that think of what you guys can do to help you feel more at ease together
My crab is very manly & loves that I basically glue my hands to him. I snuggle up under him like a baby anytime I want. He loves that I'm not afraid to grab him & love on him like i want. Being the super affectionate one is the role that makes ME most comfortable. He's most comfortable being super masculine & protective. We don't try to "change" that...We're true to ourselves. It works nicely.
My point, be true to yourself. If you want a man that snuggles, feeds you strawberries & caresses your hair until you fall asleep, seek one that enjoys doing it. Be with someone that fits YOU! Don't suffer if you don't have to
My point, be true to yourself. If you want a man that snuggles, feeds you strawberries & caresses your hair until you fall asleep, seek one that enjoys doing it. Be with someone that fits YOU! Don't suffer if you don't have to
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