Cancer Ex

Yup, it's one of those. Awesome.

My boyfriend of two years just recently broke up with me two days ago (I'm obviously devastated and still sobbing about it when I can/am alone). We've been going through difficulties for a few months now, but we'd been trying to make it work. He told me that it felt like it was "too late for us, we had our chance and we both blew it." He said that he's felt like he was forcing the pieces to work, forced to be with me, and that he'd been feeling like it was over already.

However, by the end of our breakup conversation, most of it hinged on how much of his issues stem from my family - namely my dad and second oldest brother. They'd been rude to him where he eventually came out and said he'd never felt this bullied since HS. I'd been working on defending and protecting him every opportunity I had (telling my dad and brother their form of joking/humor wasn't cool, it was really unfair to do that to my bf who has been nothing but polite and wonderful to them - up to a point where he just refused to shake my dad's hand the last time he came over), but it seemed like it wasn't enough for him. He said that we had issues and we can manage it, but when it came to the lack of love from my dad & brother (he did specifically tell me he needed their approval, that he needs to be accepted, and that he's not as strong as he likes to say he is) it just didn't seem like it could change. That was the major key to our break up. We'd been talking about having a family and children someday, where it wasn't something we planned our specifics but we'd had an idea of yes, we were going to have a future together.

We both eventually said we could be in one another's lives, but it would take time for him to reach out to me. I am giving him space and have no way to reach him through social media whatsoever. I want to be a better and supportive friend in the future, but the waiting/no contact is just completely devastating to me. I obviously want to give us another chance (should it happen), but I'm not even sure if that's possible - if at all. Any thoughts or inputs about cancer men and being friends with exes?

Posted by Black-Mamba

whats your sign? Friends LOOOL

I'm a Leo. I totally thought it was a dead giveaway, lol.

How old are the both of you?

Yup.... Dat crab dick strikes again.

Posted by TaurusBull1977

How old are the both of you?

Late twenties... I'm 27, he's 28.

Posted by Emhendo

Yup.... Dat crab dick strikes again.

Lmao I have no idea what that means but probably true if anything. I guess a good point of reference is we were both each other's first (nobody ever believes me when I say this, lol).

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

Yup.... Dat crab dick strikes again.

Lmao I have no idea what that means but probably true if anything. I guess a good point of reference is we were both each other's first (nobody ever believes me when I say this, lol).

click to expand

So if you are his first lover, he'll e eventually come in contact..

Just got to back off. I know it's hard..

Don't be on social media looking all sad and lost. Just live your life, show that you are happy that you got the chance to be loved by this man.. He'll notice your spirit, and it might make him miss you.

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks that I got to put up with.

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

click to expand

I wouldn't expect you to disrespect your father, or get vocal with him.. I'm sure he wouldn't expect you to do that either..

But when you saw how things were going between them, that was up to you to be like "you know what, my boyfriend isn't coming over here anymore."

And you should have not allowed your father to say anything to him at all, unless he's coming correct.. And that's if your boyfriend was to come by there.

Instead you made him come over there knowing the possibilities, and when your dad was rude to him - I hope that you said "Dad, how dare you? Let's get out of here, (insert boyfriend's name)"

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

click to expand

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

What's your background?

click to expand

100% Latino (dads from Central America, mom is Mexican)

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

What's your background?

100% Latino (dads from Central America, mom is Mexican)

What was the racist remark?

click to expand

He called him a terrorist, smh. My bf was nice enough to awkwardly laugh about it, but that's when I stepped in and said, "Dad, dont say that." Guess it wasn't serious enough (or he was drunk enough) bc he still thought it was funny to mention around me when it was just me & the family (my bf was never there to hear the recurring remarks).

He told me he doesnt hold me accountable for my family or how they are, but I told him that I do and that was something I intended to continue to reinforce. But by this point, we were done.

Posted by Black-Mamba

What's his moon? Mars? Venus?

Curious

Lmao all of this I hella dont know for sure but just a guess (using just noon), it says moon in Sag, Venus in Gemini, Mars in Aries

I know it's sad and hard but respect his decision and move forward.

Also talk with your Dad and brother so childish shit like that doesn't happen in the future with anyone you bring home.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Ladyleo18

My Cancer is friends with his exes. Most of them are married with kids now and he even went to some of their weddings so I think they can stay friends with exes. He's had a few try get back with him but he didn't go back. He says once the glass breaks it stays broken.

I think approval from your family is important to Cancer guys. They seem really traditional in that sense so it sucks that something like that would come between you.

I Dont think they give a fuk as long as their mothers are happy

click to expand

He says that he envies what one of his friends has with his own FIL... says he wants to at least be liked by my family. My mom absolutely adores him, as do my other three siblings. My brother is a Scorpio and hella jaded, so idk if that affects him being a jerk to him.

And his mom and I get along so perfectly. She is always excited when I come to visit and we work in similar areas so we are always talking, sometimes I even forget about my bf when I would go over to see him lol.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

What's your background?

100% Latino (dads from Central America, mom is Mexican)

What was the racist remark?

He called him a terrorist, smh. My bf was nice enough to awkwardly laugh about it, but that's when I stepped in and said, "Dad, dont say that." Guess it wasn't serious enough (or he was drunk enough) bc he still thought it was funny to mention around me when it was just me & the family (my bf was never there to hear the recurring remarks).

He told me he doesnt hold me accountable for my family or how they are, but I told him that I do and that was something I intended to continue to reinforce. But by this point, we were done.

I figured he was an Arab when you said west Asian

That's terrible..i would think the religion would be the issue seeing how Latin ppl are very Catholic

But to call someone a terrorist

Yikes

click to expand

We aren't a religious family at all, and neither is his. But yeah, those comments have always dug at me and still do.

Posted by Muderface

I know it's sad and hard but respect his decision and move forward.

Also talk with your Dad and brother so childish shit like that doesn't happen in the future with anyone you bring home.

Yeah, I have been waiting to get in a better mood to sit down and talk with them about it because I know if I would have done it any sooner (like yesterday) I would have blasted them all.

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

What's your background?

100% Latino (dads from Central America, mom is Mexican)

What was the racist remark?

He called him a terrorist, smh. My bf was nice enough to awkwardly laugh about it, but that's when I stepped in and said, "Dad, dont say that." Guess it wasn't serious enough (or he was drunk enough) bc he still thought it was funny to mention around me when it was just me & the family (my bf was never there to hear the recurring remarks).

He told me he doesnt hold me accountable for my family or how they are, but I told him that I do and that was something I intended to continue to reinforce. But by this point, we were done.

click to expand

Dude.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

Racist?

LOOOL i just can't

Yeah, I couldn't believe he said it and thought it was no big deal... I have told him off about it multiple times (my bf is from west Asia) and it just didn't seem to be a problem for him. I realized my mistake afterward and never demanded him to come around.

What's your background?

100% Latino (dads from Central America, mom is Mexican)

What was the racist remark?

He called him a terrorist, smh. My bf was nice enough to awkwardly laugh about it, but that's when I stepped in and said, "Dad, dont say that." Guess it wasn't serious enough (or he was drunk enough) bc he still thought it was funny to mention around me when it was just me & the family (my bf was never there to hear the recurring remarks).

He told me he doesnt hold me accountable for my family or how they are, but I told him that I do and that was something I intended to continue to reinforce. But by this point, we were done.

I figured he was an Arab when you said west Asian

That's terrible..i would think the religion would be the issue seeing how Latin ppl are very Catholic

But to call someone a terrorist

Yikes

We aren't a religious family at all, and neither is his. But yeah, those comments have always dug at me and still do.

So you can't even blame religion for the ignorance. Sad

click to expand

My dad seems to teeter on conservative so it's really messed up to see him parrot such stupid racist tropes and generalizations of people. I have the biggest problem with him thinking that bs is funny, bc his friends do, but I always get an eye roll with a "lol ok sweetie" remark when I say something back

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Emhendo

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by Emhendo

And you shouldn't have subjected him to your dad and brother if you know how they treat him...

Why would tell him to come over your house?

You couldn't meet him outside or at some place? You supposed to protect him, like he protects you.

I think every couple should have a favorite place and meet up spot.. Just a safe place where it's just you two.. Park, lake, field, the car, his house. It don't matter.

If I was him, I would have told you that you gotta meet me out - or we just not going to see each other today. I wish I would come to a woman's house knowing it's assholes waiting in the lurks.

See, my dad and brother got along with him great during the first year or so of our relationship. My dad even told his friends and our family at a party how proud he was that he was my bf, how great he was, etc. But then my dad and brother said something racist once and I just kind of went "Dont say that." I'm not sure if I was supposed to get into a screaming match with them or not (given that my dad is even more vocal than i am, hes a Leo too btw). My dad can be a little too blunt too, which has always been an issue for me.

I have recently made greater effort to get into with my dad over his comments, but by that point, my bf had stopped coming around.

I wouldn't expect you to disrespect your father, or get vocal with him.. I'm sure he wouldn't expect you to do that either..

But when you saw how things were going between them, that was up to you to be like "you know what, my boyfriend isn't coming over here anymore."

And you should have not allowed your father to say anything to him at all, unless he's coming correct.. And that's if your boyfriend was to come by there.

Instead you made him come over there knowing the possibilities, and when your dad was rude to him - I hope that you said "Dad, how dare you? Let's get out of here, (insert boyfriend's name)"

Isn't once enough to know

relationships are hard enough without dealing with fuked up family members

click to expand

Nah I don't blame dude for getting the fuck out of dodge..

I would have done the same.

She can blame her family and her lack of solution for losing him.

Update: So my ex reached out to me yesterday night. He texted, asking how I was doing. I didn't want to tell him how hurt and sad I still am (Leo - still licking my wounds and pretending like I'm a HBIC on the surface), so I told him I was fine... thank you for asking. I asked how he was doing and he told me that he's not doing well - he said he thought he would reach out to me, just to make him feel better. A few minutes later he texted me that he was going to sleep and promptly said goodnight. I just texted him that I hoped he felt better & goodnight.

Hopefully I did okay. I don't want to hurt him but he asked for the breakup *and* space. He has yet to text me but I'm guessing that he will probably, if anything, go into hiding for a lot longer this time around.

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

click to expand

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

click to expand

Okay, well, he came over to my parents' home probably three times. I never forced him back over after anything went down. I never forced him to spend time with my family. I did stand up to my dad every time he made sly comments after my ex quit coming around. I have gotten into screaming matches with him and we're definitely on shaky terms and have been for years.

It's okay if he or anyone blames me for the lack of immediate and harsh response to family members. It was my f up.

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

Okay, well, he came over to my parents' home probably three times. I never forced him back over after anything went down. I never forced him to spend time with my family. I did stand up to my dad every time he made sly comments after my ex quit coming around. I have gotten into screaming matches with him and we're definitely on shaky terms and have been for years.

It's okay if he or anyone blames me for the lack of immediate and harsh response to family members. It was my f up.

click to expand

You are not gonna have any successful future relationship if you stick with your family. Cut loose whatever causes troubles. Move to a new city if you have to. If your cancer comes back , grab his hand and never let him go , go somewhere far away and start something new with him. Or go ahead and text him, let him know you are ready to drop everything. Communication is the key, always. Put aside your damn pride for once and think like a human being, not like a leo "still licking her wounds" , how poetic. Water couldn't care less about pride, talk to him before it's too late. If you wait too long he might think you didn't care enough in the first place and you sure don't want to lose him.

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

Okay, well, he came over to my parents' home probably three times. I never forced him back over after anything went down. I never forced him to spend time with my family. I did stand up to my dad every time he made sly comments after my ex quit coming around. I have gotten into screaming matches with him and we're definitely on shaky terms and have been for years.

It's okay if he or anyone blames me for the lack of immediate and harsh response to family members. It was my f up.

You are not gonna have any successful future relationship if you stick with your family. Cut loose whatever causes troubles. Move to a new city if you have to. If your cancer comes back , grab his hand and never let him go , go somewhere far away and start something new with him. Or go ahead and text him, let him know you are ready to drop everything. Communication is the key, always. Put aside your damn pride for once and think like a human being, not like a leo "still licking her wounds" , how poetic. Water couldn't care less about pride, talk to him before it's too late. If you wait too long he might think you didn't care enough in the first place and you sure don't want to lose him.

click to expand

I don't have a great relationship with my family and I even told my ex that he was my family. He told me that he didn't want an us vs them, but I told him that I didn't care if they wouldn't support me and us. It was a big deal for him because we were considering children. He wanted a relationship with my dad because he sees it with his friends and envies that. We had our own life far from our hometown, we rarely came up to visit family because I just don't care to see them (other than to visit my dogs, who I wasn't allowed to bring into my current apartment).

I don't know how else I'm supposed to get through to him. He wanted space. He needed time away from me before he wanted to be friends. So now I'm supposed to double text him? Tell him I miss him? Tell him that I wish he would reconsider? He asked me to respect his space and that's what I did/am doing.

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

Okay, well, he came over to my parents' home probably three times. I never forced him back over after anything went down. I never forced him to spend time with my family. I did stand up to my dad every time he made sly comments after my ex quit coming around. I have gotten into screaming matches with him and we're definitely on shaky terms and have been for years.

It's okay if he or anyone blames me for the lack of immediate and harsh response to family members. It was my f up.

You are not gonna have any successful future relationship if you stick with your family. Cut loose whatever causes troubles. Move to a new city if you have to. If your cancer comes back , grab his hand and never let him go , go somewhere far away and start something new with him. Or go ahead and text him, let him know you are ready to drop everything. Communication is the key, always. Put aside your damn pride for once and think like a human being, not like a leo "still licking her wounds" , how poetic. Water couldn't care less about pride, talk to him before it's too late. If you wait too long he might think you didn't care enough in the first place and you sure don't want to lose him.

I don't have a great relationship with my family and I even told my ex that he was my family. He told me that he didn't want an us vs them, but I told him that I didn't care if they wouldn't support me and us. It was a big deal for him because we were considering children. He wanted a relationship with my dad because he sees it with his friends and envies that. We had our own life far from our hometown, we rarely came up to visit family because I just don't care to see them (other than to visit my dogs, who I wasn't allowed to bring into my current apartment).

I don't know how else I'm supposed to get through to him. He wanted space. He needed time away from me before he wanted to be friends. So now I'm supposed to double text him? Tell him I miss him? Tell him that I wish he would reconsider? He asked me to respect his space and that's what I did/am doing.

click to expand

Okay if he asked for it then you should respect yes. Sad, hopefully you guys get back together

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by thankyounote

Posted by pisceanloves

"I want to be better and supportive friend" - Irony.. You failed him

How so?

Seriously?? Why did you keep bringing him over your dads house? Why you didn't step up? my dad is more vocal than I am is a complete bs. What , all grown up woman afraid of your dad? Gee

Okay, well, he came over to my parents' home probably three times. I never forced him back over after anything went down. I never forced him to spend time with my family. I did stand up to my dad every time he made sly comments after my ex quit coming around. I have gotten into screaming matches with him and we're definitely on shaky terms and have been for years.

It's okay if he or anyone blames me for the lack of immediate and harsh response to family members. It was my f up.

You are not gonna have any successful future relationship if you stick with your family. Cut loose whatever causes troubles. Move to a new city if you have to. If your cancer comes back , grab his hand and never let him go , go somewhere far away and start something new with him. Or go ahead and text him, let him know you are ready to drop everything. Communication is the key, always. Put aside your damn pride for once and think like a human being, not like a leo "still licking her wounds" , how poetic. Water couldn't care less about pride, talk to him before it's too late. If you wait too long he might think you didn't care enough in the first place and you sure don't want to lose him.

I don't have a great relationship with my family and I even told my ex that he was my family. He told me that he didn't want an us vs them, but I told him that I didn't care if they wouldn't support me and us. It was a big deal for him because we were considering children. He wanted a relationship with my dad because he sees it with his friends and envies that. We had our own life far from our hometown, we rarely came up to visit family because I just don't care to see them (other than to visit my dogs, who I wasn't allowed to bring into my current apartment).

I don't know how else I'm supposed to get through to him. He wanted space. He needed time away from me before he wanted to be friends. So now I'm supposed to double text him? Tell him I miss him? Tell him that I wish he would reconsider? He asked me to respect his space and that's what I did/am doing.

Okay if he asked for it then you should respect yes. Sad, hopefully you guys get back together

click to expand

Thanks for understanding. 🙂 Our situation is pretty bleak and I still love & care for him very much. I would love nothing more than to text him and go word vomit (I stopped caring about oversharing a long time ago) but... I know it wouldn't be for the best.