Cancer man came back..

I met a Cancer man back in February (I'm a Pisces). Sparks flew.. but by the end of 3rd week of March, he disappears. Mostly my fault, because I had made assumptions about things.. and had reacted badly when it turned out that we weren't on the same page. I was sorry, so I had mailed him a letter.. an actual handwritten letter, so it would show it was a heart felt apology. One month to the day, that I last heard from him, he contacts me. The contact is not exactly like nothing has happened, but it's been three weeks now, and we haven't talked about. He is different now though. I think he realized that his "charm" was too much for me. lol Or maybe I'm seeing the real him now, and I am being tested to see if I still want him.. I dunno, but I am trying to stay as positive as possible. It's hard, because it's very possible that he is seeing other women too, and I'm trying not to get my hopes up.. but Pisceans are dreamers. He and I have plans to go on a trip in June.. and also in August.. so, I hold on to that to stay positive. Am I on the right track? Stay positive and don't push? He knows how I feel..

I hope not, but that's why I'm trying not to get my hopes up, in case he disappears again. I will give ppl the benefit of the doubt the first time around, but do it to me again.. I can disappear just as easily, but permanently. I just get a sense that he is testing me.. see if I can stay on the roller coaster, as his moods shift from one day to the next. If I sense that he needs space, I will back off and give it to him. My active imagination is what I battle with, wondering if his mood has something to do with me, or if he is talking to someone else.. I try and stay busy, so I don't go down that road. I don't like feeling this way, because it's like I'm letting his moods affect my level of self esteem.. I'm not used to that. I think that is mostly because I am unsure of his feelings. He came back.. but I don't know if there is anything I can do to have him see me as more than a "friend", than just be patient and let him take the lead.

Thank you for your response.. what hefty price would I have to pay, that I'll end up regretting?

I know.. I don't know why I am doing this to myself. It's like I've turned into a masochist. lol I've never had a guy affect me this way..

Does the cat/mouse play ever end in a good way? The way I feel right now.. I will stand still and end contact.. and try my best to let him go.

I went and found your original topic, too. You said that he replied to your letter as he didn't see you guys being anything beyond friends, right? I think that speaks volumes. If he's been out with other women and told some lies, then that shows he's just not in to you. If I were you, I don't think I'd ever be able to trust him completely, especially in a relationship with him.
I know it's hard, but I think it's time you move on from him. I honestly see more bad things happening if you continue with this. I'm the paranoid type, but I could definitely see him being of the cheating kind.

Posted by rhaina
It's hard, because it's very possible that he is seeing other women too, and I'm trying not to get my hopes up.. but Pisceans are dreamers. He and I have plans to go on a trip in June.. and also in August.. so, I hold on to that to stay positive.

This is not good... he's dangling the carrot of a trip away to keep your hopes up... and keep you attached. The fact that's he's doubled it with a second trip date, when you haven't even spent time re-connecting, shows he's over doing it.

If he was interested in more than sex he'd probably want to see how things go..

Mmm Vin Diesel! 🙂

I second guess myself a lot when it comes to him.. it seems that in my relationships in my past, I was able to rely on my intuition. His moods make him hard to read some days (he's a cancer moon too), so my imagination takes over.. and from past experience, they're not good thoughts. I try to stay optimistic, but there are days I need to recharge.

I'm not going to do anything drastic, just step back and give my attention to myself, for a bit. He's probably got enough females giving him attention to not really miss mine anyway. lol

And of course, he calls me from work this morning, which he rarely does, unless it is during his lunch. So confused! lol

LOL.. I wish! 😉

I've been thinking about what I should do about the situation. I have come up with just letting things go as they are until after the trip June 7th. For months now, I've been pushing other men away that want to date me, so I open myself up to start dating again. The Aug 31st trip is to a concert that he really wants to go to.. I was able to get tickets for free (I have friends in radio that hook me up), so I will give him the tickets for his bday.. and he can take whoever he wants to. That's my plan. lol

When a Cancer says, "I do like the person that you are [my name], I do think you're cool 🙂".. is he saying that he does like me, but I'm not "the one"? I've heard good and bad things when a man tells a woman that.. but I wanted to get a Cancer's take on that. 🙂 Thank you!

That you've been given juuust enough line to dangle, and just enough for him to reel you back in.

He knows my plan, so that doesn't surprise me. If patience is all it took.. I could try my damnedest, but he isn't offering me any hope for more, so I have to take him for his word. If he is not willing to budge, that will be his choice, and for me to move on, will be mine. I have to be strong..