Cancer man came back,but..

I posted here way back april. I was seeing this cancer guy for a month,everything was ok then poof! Vanished! One month no communication. Then out of the blue,he liked the video I posted on fb of me playing the piano. He seldom likes my posts so I was kinda shocked he liked the video and was happy he was still alive. But then the next day when I tried looking at his fb, I saw he deleted me! Like wth?! You never talk to me for a month,like my video then suddenly you delete me?! Out of impulse I txted him-hey what's up? Then we txted for hours,then I asked why he deleted me,then he said he was getting flooded abt gorilla comments on his newsfeed so he went crazy and deleted people. Thing is, I never posted anything abt the gorilla,and why did u like my video if you're gonna delete me on fb after?? Are you asking for attention?

And?

What else?

Don't try to understand them. He'll most likely never admit that his behavior is erratic or that's he's done anything that not a completely normal thing to do.

I had one do something similar to me and his explanation was something about me threatening his masculinity? the timeline went something like, he continuously blew me off, I let him know (gently) that I didn't think we wanted the same things, he agreed, a week later he deleted me from FB, I asked him why, he snottily wrote back that he didn't need to be FB friends with someone he wasn't going to talk to anymore(says the guys with over 1,000 Fb friends). Months later we reconnected and I made a joke about being deleted by him, and his explanation was the masculinity thing...

Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those emotions, so I say give up, go find a guy that has his shit together.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
What else?

@FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428 I have no clue...do you?

Attention seeking tactics

Posted by Shellyd238
Don't try to understand them. He'll most likely never admit that his behavior is erratic or that's he's done anything that not a completely normal thing to do.

I had one do something similar to me and his explanation was something about me threatening his masculinity? the timeline went something like, he continuously blew me off, I let him know (gently) that I didn't think we wanted the same things, he agreed, a week later he deleted me from FB, I asked him why, he snottily wrote back that he didn't need to be FB friends with someone he wasn't going to talk to anymore(says the guys with over 1,000 Fb friends). Months later we reconnected and I made a joke about being deleted by him, and his explanation was the masculinity thing...

Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those emotions, so I say give up, go find a guy that has his shit together.

@Shellyd238 exactly! I even asked him if I did something wrong (which I know for a fact that I didn't do anything) and I apologized if I did. He said that I didn't do anything wrong and it was him going crazy deleting people on fb,he even said that his fat fingers did it..like wth?!

With your cancer guy,is he insecure of his masculinity? Why is he acting like a girl?--agreeing that you didn't wanted the same things then deleting you on fb? He's like looking for attention from you. I agree with they do idiotic things coz they don't know how to handle their emotions. But they have this thing that makes a push and pull addicting thing..idk

I'd say try to forget him and move on...

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

Posted by cornflower2
I'd say try to forget him and move on...

@cornflower2 that's what I was trying to do when I didn't hear from him for a month,but then deleting a person on fb..is just immature..haha he can just txt me

@siopaowiks Yeah, I agreee about the immaturity! My experience with cancer men are not great either. Both were grown men but still acting very immature and weird... As a Scorpio I do not like these side stepping games or even worse their vanishing act, this is soooo not for me :-)

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

click to expand

I don't think it's that he wants to see you. He just wanted attention because his uppity self made such a difficult effort of liking a video.

Posted by cornflower2
@siopaowiks Yeah, I agreee about the immaturity! My experience with cancer men are not great either. Both were grown men but still acting very immature and weird... As a Scorpio I do not like these side stepping games or even worse their vanishing act, this is soooo not for me :-)

@cornflower2 their immaturity is sometimes cute but sometime is just annoying. They should jut grow up so people can understand them instead of hiding in their shells. I can't imagine how weird your Cancer guy acted though haha

Posted by Arielle83
Weird.

I deleted heaps of ppl because of the gorilla stuff.

Made me so sad that I couldn't see it anymore!!!

@Arielle83 well that was weird! Maybe Cancer people went on a deleting spree on fb. Lol. But why? If he eants attention, I can easily give it to him. He can just txt.

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

I don't think it's that he wants to see you. He just wanted attention because his uppity self made such a difficult effort of liking a video.

click to expand

@aquarius09 hahaha really? Liking a video for a cancer is of great effort from them? I didn't know that..hmmm should I do anything then? He should've just messaged me instead..but if he doesn't want to see me then seek for attention..

I'm sorry to be the first to break this to you, but social media interaction does not make for a real life relationship.

Him liking a post of yours doesn't really mean shit. For all you know he's doing the same with 10 other chicks posts on several other medians.

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

click to expand

There's no need for him to message you when with a simple like and no effort on his part you rush to text him yourself.

Posted by LadyNeptune
I'm sorry to be the first to break this to you, but social media interaction does not make for a real life relationship.

Him liking a post of yours doesn't really mean shit. For all you know he's doing the same with 10 other chicks posts on several other medians.

@LadyNeptune yep,haha I know that. That's why I didn't really put much thought in him liking my video,well tbh it kinda surprised me and that was it. What bothered me was the deleting part wherein after liking my video then you delete me after a few days? Doesn't make sense unless you're seeking for attention. Coz if he just deleted me without liking the video then I wouldn't notice,right? But if he deletes me after liking my video then I would surely notice. Me txting impulsively is just to check why he deleted me,nothing more nothing less. As a leo, I try to make ammends if I offended/hurt people without me knowing. But he said no,I didn't do anything wrong and we can still be friends..weird

Posted by Arielle83

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by Arielle83
Weird.

I deleted heaps of ppl because of the gorilla stuff.

Made me so sad that I couldn't see it anymore!!!

@Arielle83 well that was weird! Maybe Cancer people went on a deleting spree on fb. Lol. But why? If he eants attention, I can easily give it to him. He can just txt.

Well if I find things negative or sad, I don't want to see hear or talk about it. The gorilla thing really bothered me.

Social media is irrelevant to me. My actions have no meaning in it. Maybe you "liked" something and it was related to something he didn't want to see. If you like things via your friebds, it will still post even if you don't share it.

Also maybe u posted something he thought funny, and if you are both in the same network, he will see it. So maybe he just randomly saw something and randomly liked it.

I've actually done that and had weirdos trying to add me that I didn't know.

This is why I think it's all arbitrary.

Maybe he's checking in. I don't think he's trying to get attention.

click to expand

@Arielle83 you are so on point and knowledgable in this area. You're one of the people I always wait for comments haha Yeah,he's a gentle giant (cancer guy) and got really bothered about the gorilla on social media. But he did mention when we txted that he liked my piano playing video. I thought that was kinda nice of him to mention it while we were arguing as why he deleted me. Haha weirdos trying to add you,lol maybe you're that hot,that's why 🙂

I get the emotional part,he was really angry/upset with his ex last time we spoke-which was months ago.. I just don't know what went wrong..yeah,hope he is checking in. I just don't know what his deal is,he said he was soooooo busy. So cancer people recharge and go distant is it? It seems like when I'm okay and moved on already then he appears out of nowhere...

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

I don't think it's that he wants to see you. He just wanted attention because his uppity self made such a difficult effort of liking a video.

@aquarius09 hahaha really? Liking a video for a cancer is of great effort from them? I didn't know that..hmmm should I do anything then? He should've just messaged me instead..but if he doesn't want to see me then seek for attention..

click to expand

I refuse to believe that you're that naive. I'm clearly being sarcastic. There is little to no effort involved in liking someone's status or pic on any social media platform. Refer to lady neptune's first post.

Posted by Arielle83
My profile pic is Jean Claude van damme so they can't see me!!

I actually deleted 4 of my husbands friebds this week.

They annoy me. Hahaha

And this chick I knew ten years ago that keeps posting affirmations about herself. Like shaddup.

@Arielle83 hahaha nice touch with van damme profile pic € lol the deleting spree, well I do delete people who annoys me as well, i can relate to that. But sometimes I just unfollow them on fb. You are still friends but you just don't see any of their shit on your newsfeed haha

Oh the affirmations and photo of the day with deep quotes annoy me as hell! Like the quote doesn't even connect to the photo!

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09

Posted by siopaowiks

Posted by aquarius09
Attention seeking tactics

@aquarius09 that's what I thought. But he can just message me if he wants to see me..

I don't think it's that he wants to see you. He just wanted attention because his uppity self made such a difficult effort of liking a video.

@aquarius09 hahaha really? Liking a video for a cancer is of great effort from them? I didn't know that..hmmm should I do anything then? He should've just messaged me instead..but if he doesn't want to see me then seek for attention..

I refuse to believe that you're that naive. I'm clearly being sarcastic. There is little to no effort involved in liking someone's status or pic on any social media platform. Refer to lady neptune's first post.

click to expand

@aquarius09 tbh I didn't really know cancer people have difficulty in giving effort in liking a video. I have cancer friends who just like stuff randomly. I don't see any effort in liking,so I don't think it was a difficult effort for the cancer guy..anyways,it doesn't really matter. I didn't really care if he liked it or not,its just the fact that he deleted me..that's all 🙂 but thanks for your opinion €

Posted by Goldigold
Ok maybe I'm wrong

@Goldigold hey there! How have you been?! Oh what do you been by straight up lie? Which one is it? „

Posted by Shashkay
He isn't into you.

@Shashkay haha maybe your dad wasn't aware he deleted you or something. We liked eachother before he vanished into his shell for unknown reasons though haha

@Goldigold yeah,it kinda sounded like that. A bit sketchy,really. If you don't want to see anything from that person then just unfollow them,rather than liking then deleting..

Posted by thinktoomuch
Would one even want the cancer man to come back? He would still be the same person...
And if not, he would have to work a lifetime to build trust. And if there is something the cancer man I know does not do, it´s work.

Perhaps I´d even be insulted if he tried to come back, like wtf, you think I´m that easy?!?!!!!!!

@thinktoomuch yeah,you are right. I just kinda thought that maybe he came back or just too shy to tell/admit why he suddenly disappeared..and ofcourse I am not that easy. Thanks for this, a leo sometimes need harsh words to wake up from a situation haha

Posted by thinktoomuch
Well I can only speak for my own personal experience and situation, which is most likely different than yours. But because of all these 'cancer male came back' and 'how do I get him back' and all that, I´ve been thinking to myself, if I really wanted him to come back and how I would react.

The too shy to tell and admit excuses - I mean, how would that work out long term? If he cafn´t be honest, then how can anybody ever have an honest relationship with him anyhow? People change, but they rarely change in how they relate to you and how they see you. If he has used or played you before, then that´s how he related to you and always will.

@thinktoomuch yeah, I really don't know if I want him back,its ok wether he comes back or not. True about the excuses, I just thought he is too good to be true when we started dating..although he didn't play me,he just disappeared..thanks for yiur thoughts, he is my first cancer so I really have no idea. I keep on attracting water signs-cancer,pisces, gemini.. 😢

Posted by thinktoomuch
He probably is too good to be true. That was my experience - what cancer took from me emotionally, he only got because he lied.

@thinktoomuch oh dear,is it ok to ask what he did? And how long you guys dated? Yeah..maybe my cancer guy is too good to be true. He was very caring and nurturing when we dated,he cooked for me and was always happy like a kid whenever I stayed at his place. Really didn't know why it kinda faded away..

Posted by thinktoomuch
Actually the most disgusting thing he did, was making me feel like I was crazy for doubting him. He told me I was paranoid, thinking too much, making up things in my mind. He made me question myself. When I look at it now, he comes off as a complete nutter with serious control issues.

@thinktoomuch omg!!! No way!!! that is exactly how the cancer guy described his ex when I asked about her. The ex went crazy suicidal when the cancer guy went on vacation with his family,the girl being suicidal led to call off the whole engagement---this is the story according to the cancer guy! Ofcourse I kinda doubted the way he said it coz a girl won't get crazy unless the guy triggered those emotions. So he manipulated you then turned the table around!! Oh my word!! That's crazy of him,he's like an emotional rollercoaster! Why did he introduce u as a friend then? Is he too shy to admit you two are together? Why did he said all those things? I hope you're much better now. Hugs dear!˜

Posted by Shellyd238
Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those .

^^ I am a Cancer and I completely back this statement.

Often my feelings look like this (not a real scenario):

I wonder what he's up to, I really miss him.
**Looks at Facebook**
That's so cool that he got to go to that concert, I know he always wanted to.
**Likes post and logs off Facebook**
Maybe I shouldn't have liked that post. We stopped talking for a reason. I felt totally insecure when we were hanging out. I don't want to do that again.
**Logs back on and looks at his Facebook again**
He's talking to a ton of other women right now anyway. Ugh, I really don't want that self-created drama back in my life.
**Deletes him from Facebook**
Look at me, I'm already acting erratically just thinking about him. What in the world is wrong with me? Why did I delete him? I should have just liked the post and stopped thinking about it. Why do I do this to myself?
**He texts me the next day**
I really have missed him, we have such nice conversations it would be so nice just to talk again.
**Talks to him all day**

Often if I get it in my head that a relationship (whether romantic or platonic) is one that is meant to be I have a hard time letting go. But if I let myself feel insecure I will be too guarded to make it work. I just end up in some endless loop...

I'm older now, so I think things through before I take action much more often than I did in the past and if I do react I am willing to admit the reasons why after I have had some time to think, but only if I trust you. But when I was younger I lived in a constant self-created mind f***.

Posted by thinktoomuch
Had to hide my post from before, ´cause it was too harsh. I´m fueled by hatred atm.
But to answer your question: he introduced me as a friend, because he didn´t see me as anyone he could ever get in a relationship with. ... He just forgot to tell me and told me lies instead.

@thinktoomuch no need to hide your post though, I don't mind. It's much better to release the anger so it will be easier to move on. Well he is crazy,why would he punish you for things you didn't do? Or did you do something to trigger him those emotions? I really think this is what happened to the ex fiance of the cancer guy I was seeing. There was hatred on his face while he was telling the story,they're not friends on fb anymore but their photos together are still there,same goes with the girls fb (well the girls photos was private, I can only see the past status haha) But they're in two different countries now, so I doubt they'll get back together especially after that incident. When did yours happen?

Posted by CybeleRising

Posted by Shellyd238
Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those .

^^ I am a Cancer and I completely back this statement.

Often my feelings look like this (not a real scenario):

I wonder what he's up to, I really miss him.
**Looks at Facebook**
That's so cool that he got to go to that concert, I know he always wanted to.
**Likes post and logs off Facebook**
Maybe I shouldn't have liked that post. We stopped talking for a reason. I felt totally insecure when we were hanging out. I don't want to do that again.
**Logs back on and looks at his Facebook again**
He's talking to a ton of other women right now anyway. Ugh, I really don't want that self-created drama back in my life.
**Deletes him from Facebook**
Look at me, I'm already acting erratically just thinking about him. What in the world is wrong with me? Why did I delete him? I should have just liked the post and stopped thinking about it. Why do I do this to myself?
**He texts me the next day**
I really have missed him, we have such nice conversations it would be so nice just to talk again.
**Talks to him all day**

Often if I get it in my head that a relationship (whether romantic or platonic) is one that is meant to be I have a hard time letting go. But if I let myself feel insecure I will be too guarded to make it work. I just end up in some endless loop...

I'm older now, so I think things through before I take action much more often than I did in the past and if I do react I am willing to admit the reasons why after I have had some time to think, but only if I trust you. But when I was younger I lived in a constant self-created mind f***.

click to expand

@CybeleRising finally! Another cancer to comment! Haha although I think female and make cancer have different emotional phase,though I wish what you said here was what he was thinking in the first place haha I enjoyed your little skit 😉 thanks for the effort of explaining it haha

Posted by Shellyd238
Don't try to understand them. He'll most likely never admit that his behavior is erratic or that's he's done anything that not a completely normal thing to do.

I had one do something similar to me and his explanation was something about me threatening his masculinity? the timeline went something like, he continuously blew me off, I let him know (gently) that I didn't think we wanted the same things, he agreed, a week later he deleted me from FB, I asked him why, he snottily wrote back that he didn't need to be FB friends with someone he wasn't going to talk to anymore(says the guys with over 1,000 Fb friends). Months later we reconnected and I made a joke about being deleted by him, and his explanation was the masculinity thing...

Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those emotions, so I say give up, go find a guy that has his shit together.

Wow sounds just like my bf

Posted by sparkle11

Posted by Shellyd238
Don't try to understand them. He'll most likely never admit that his behavior is erratic or that's he's done anything that not a completely normal thing to do.

I had one do something similar to me and his explanation was something about me threatening his masculinity? the timeline went something like, he continuously blew me off, I let him know (gently) that I didn't think we wanted the same things, he agreed, a week later he deleted me from FB, I asked him why, he snottily wrote back that he didn't need to be FB friends with someone he wasn't going to talk to anymore(says the guys with over 1,000 Fb friends). Months later we reconnected and I made a joke about being deleted by him, and his explanation was the masculinity thing...

Personally I believe that they really have alot of emotions going on in there but the have NO idea of how to deal with them so they do completely idiotic things instead. and until they mature they will never admit to those emotions, so I say give up, go find a guy that has his shit together.

Wow sounds just like my bf

click to expand

DANGER! DANGER! ABORT! 😄 Haha I joke, but not really...

It's weird how Sag/Cancer seems to be drawn to each other, but It hasn't worked out for me, and rarely for anyone else I've known... Actually 2 Male couples I know who have been together for years are Sag/Cancer, I guess it's just the femaleness of it, that fucks things up! 😛