Cancer man came back. How to deal with him now?
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by andrea13 on Sunday, January 18, 2015 and has 12 replies.
I am a Aries woman and I met a Cancer man 6 months ago and all was absolutely awesome. Our relationship starts really fast but it doesen't bother me or something. He is singer and it's very busy so our dates were not too many (once at two weeks). He is 38 years old and I am 19 years old(I know..big difference but doesen't seem to bother us). We haven't had sex because I am a virgin and this is my decision until I get married but we just had foreplay without intercourse. After 3 months I have a crisis because he doesen't contacted me for 2 weeks and I called him once he doesn't answer, i called him next day and again no answer, the next day i started to call him continuously for about 30 times and get NO ANSWER. After these calls I send him this message: "You make fun of me! For you it's just a game. You deserve nothing from me." and he replayed to me immediately: "For how aggressive you are I won't talk to you for 2 months."(He punished me) During the punishment I had texted him sometimes(1 message a month). A month ago I gave up on him and go on with my life and NOW 3 MONTHS HAD PASSED since he punished me and TODAY HE TEXTED ME! AFTER 3 MONTHS! I have no idea how to deal with this? How can I be? I really really still have some feelings for him... Tell me some advices...
Posted by aquavita2
Dont take my advice as a professional advice. I suggest that you seek therapy if 20 years age difference does not bother you!
You're right, I really have some daddy issues. My parents divorced when i was 3 yr old and since then I saw my father very rare. After this my mother get married with a man who's 17 yr older than she. I know age gap may be a problem because of the differences of the conceptions but I'm still straightforward to this. I had go to the psyhologyst some times and he told me the same..father issues.
He is 38 yr old and not married...He was talking about marriage when we were toghether but I don't want to be gullible or naive and I just stayed cool.
I loved this man...but after he started to use the silent treatment with me I started to repress my love for him...Now I'm more confused.
He's 38... You're 19..... He's 38.... You're 19...... Sorry, I don't get it... And he's playing games. A man won't do that if he's truly interested in you.
And punishing you?! He's already showing you that he thinks that you're nothing but a child. Tell him to leave you the fuck alone. Or better yet, have you parents tell him to back off.
Posted by Iwill
How come you go after these old guys andrea? This one and then the scorpio old guy too? I think you are mistaking old guys for being something safe, but you have to realize, that old guys when with such a young thing like you, s anything but safe. Their the opposite and probably in it for the sex. This cancer almost sounds like some sort of dominatrix man with his punishment!
The cancer man problem is and old problem, i was with him last year in june and after break up I go on with my life. The scorpio man is recent.
Rachelannthepisces I can qoute you're comment.
I understand your point of view. I'm not immature or naive, you don't even know the long story. I was just asking how to deal with him now? Me and this man had a great relationship, he was in love with me and sometimes obsessive with me. Having a cancer man who loves you it's the best thing in life(You really have to know how amazing is a cancer man, when he's in love sure, if he isn't he'll be a BIG DOUCHE). After i screw up with him I go on with my life and doesn't expected he'll come back and suddenly he contacted me.
I understand your point of view. I'm not immature or naive, you don't even know the long story. I was just asking how to deal with him now? Me and this man had a great relationship, he was in love with me and sometimes obsessive with me. Having a cancer man who loves you it's the best thing in life(You really have to know how amazing is a cancer man, when he's in love sure, if he isn't he'll be a BIG DOUCHE). After i screw up with him I go on with my life and doesn't expected he'll come back and suddenly he contacted me.
Posted by Arielle83
So it's about being in love with "you"? And then when they stop paying you attention, you act like a psycho and call obsessively? Do you like them for who they are or is it about the attention they give you? You're young and everyone is extremely egotistical at that age, so although you may think you're mature and one in a million, since these older guys want you over women their own age, you're not. Been there, done that. You're a plaything. It's apparent just like how you've been punished because you acted like a spoiled brat.
My reaction was an response to his actions. I don't think I was wrong calling him when he doesn't cantacted me for 2 weeks. As I said he is singer and it's very busy but I'm sure he has some little breaks to sent me a fucking message. I haven't done anything wrong.
now leave him...he's of no good
Could be the problem...you're...too clingy, too unclingy, not stimulating enough, used up, not emotional enough or too emotional, too dependent, got unattractive, good sex flopped or got stale, take too much or ask too much and give little, insensitive, immature, not understanding of his moods or personality,vindictive, you didn't reciprocate his love when he gave you his best,really lots of things
Or...
He's...not into you, played you, found more interest in someone else, afraid of commitment, going through tough shit in life, goikh through a mood, figured that you'll never change so he forfeited the relationship and gave up. Could be lots of things.
How to fix this? Figure out what you did wrong first and go from there
Or...
He's...not into you, played you, found more interest in someone else, afraid of commitment, going through tough shit in life, goikh through a mood, figured that you'll never change so he forfeited the relationship and gave up. Could be lots of things.
How to fix this? Figure out what you did wrong first and go from there
He probably for tired of playing games with you and gave up
Signed Up: Oct 29, 2014
Comments: 1 · Posts: 16583 · Topics: 222
Comments: 1 · Posts: 16583 · Topics: 222
Fuck if younger men are doing fucked up shit then the older men are really no different. Is that the real deal? Because I was really going open minded with a 5 year age difference than myself if you are determined and have goals like I do though. Goals are simple really. Almost like having standards are simplier.
Signed Up: Oct 29, 2014
Comments: 1 · Posts: 16583 · Topics: 222
Comments: 1 · Posts: 16583 · Topics: 222
Sounds like if you haven't talked to him for a while..You might want to run and go do something for your self? Are your grades up? Do you have a job? Do you have your own place? Do you have spending money after bills paid, check? Do you have a car? Then figure a goal for you and stick to it and while your figuring your life,
then if it's meant to be go back to him and see, then you have all your shit together and can make it work or you'll meet some one else..
What if you have kids by him? Can he support you? Or He doesn't want kids?
then if it's meant to be go back to him and see, then you have all your shit together and can make it work or you'll meet some one else..
What if you have kids by him? Can he support you? Or He doesn't want kids?
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