cancer man can u help plz—

cancer man is he still interested in a leo lady?

we had an argument regarding him wantin to go to his good friend who happens to be female in the earlier hours of the morning and he said he will come back, but l finished with him there and then, he texted to say he was sorry and we texted each other thereafter saying he misses me and l replied that l missed him too, so now he has not texted me for the past 3 day, what should l do, l know l dumped him but l still like him a lot, please help and dont make matters worse by saying l shouldnt have dumped him l already know that, what does this whole thing mean is he no longer interested??please l really need your help, l dont understand he will text me that he misses me and text me to find out what am doing and then disappear on me again—

This all happened in valentines day, so you can imagine how l felt!

This all happened in valentines day, so you can imagine how l felt!

This all happened in valentines day, so you can imagine how l felt!

No, it doesn't mean that he isn't interested but break ups are big deals for crabs, they do not take it lightly.

You need to talk to him, be assertive. Tell him you want to get together to talk. Calmly ask him about the situation with his friend (that is a girl). Tell him very honestly how it made you feel and apologize for making such a big deal about the situation (if in actuality you ARE sorry).

Crabs are indirect, and the more upset they are about something, the least likely you will hear anything about it. If you want him back you need to be DIRECT, honest and assertive. Did you overreact? If so, apologize. If not, then perhaps you don't really want to be with him in the first place. Why did he absolutely NEED to go over to a girl friend's house in the morning on V-day? Did he have an explanation? Or was he wishy-washy?

He said this was his good friend she had come over from Leicester to see her boyfriend on valentines but then this guy wasn't picking up his phone so she was stranded with no where to go and l said to him why could she get the next train home he then said he is there for his friend then l said surely if u told her you are with your girl am sure she would have understood, he asked me 3 times what he should do but l said l don't know but if he chooses to go then that's it...he texted me last week that he wants to see me but he never turned up some stupid excuse about the car and he was supposed to have come to my house yesterday he never called only a text to find out if am ok..am l being played here?? Or he is still too upset with me??

He even showed me the text this girl sent to her but the FAct that he wanted to go and help this girl it just pissed me off..and now l don't know if he still wants to be with me at all..

I wouldn't want to either if you were gonna be this catty over a long-time friend just because she is female. Would you still feel this way had it been a guy? How would you feel if you were in her shoes?

You're being go awfully selfish, self-absorbed, and incredibly insecure. Instead of throwing a tantrum why don't you create a solution? If it really bothered you that much maybe you could have asked that you may come along.

A very similar situation happened with me and my cancer some months ago. He has this childhood friend, that used to be his neighbor growing up, that happens to be a girl. They even had sex a couple of times. She's been married now for years and one morning we awoke to her calling. She was freaking out and in tears over a bad fight she had with her husband. So she called my bf to meet her at a coffee shop to talk (aka her venting). Now, why not any of her other friends? For one, she doesn't have many, if any, close friends besides him. She is a hot mess psychologically and no one sticks around long enough. Her other friendships are very shallow. Even he has to stay away from her most of the time but he'll always be there for her if shit goes down. She's more like a relative than anything. You can not like your sibling but you would probably be the first there if they were in trouble.

I was a little put-off because she had to call him of all people but I understood. I also found it admirable that he would drop everything for a loved one. It gave me hope that he would do that for me as well.

A little self-awareness and some empathy can go a long way!

^^ what she said.

Cancers watch to see how our partners treat other people. If they are concerned with other's well-being, are empathic, generous etc.

The fact you had a fit, didn't come up with an alternative suggestion AND dumped him... is you showing your true colors. You are probably not the person he thought you were. So now, even though he still has feelings for you... he has to think about whether or not he wants to continue his emotional investment in someone with your character traits.

He may forgive you... but he'll never forget.

Just give him some space & some time...He'll come back around...

Thanks everybody for your responses, Ninjamu what was that all about?? No need for all that to be honest but thanks.

He text me the other day to find out if am ok, this is really going to be hard for me so how long do l have to wait for until he s forgiven me then??

Ninjamu was exactly right. It doesn't matter if he forgives you or not if you stay the same. You have to evolve, that's all. I certainly would not give you another chance. I'd just stay emotionally attached against my will for a while until I can cut you off for good. Have a nice day, Princess.

Thanks Mr.crabby..it sounds like I wouldn't get a chance anyway, l mean u could be wrong and things end up really good I don't know but what l know is l clearly don't know what to do.yes l do admit I over reacted but who doesn't when u r in this situation its hard, I really liked this guy but one thing I wouldn't do is to force the situation when in theory its no longer there..now his on my BB messenger, do I delete him or not— It does hurt sometimes seeing all his updates as it feels his moving on but because I can see all that he still puts messages like what his doing during the course of the day and he doesn't really put any nasty messages or anything indicating his seeing someone..plz help

1. You were wrong in making him choose b/w you & his friend. You made his friend's battle/circumstances about YOU. If this guy has given you reasons in the past NOT to trust him and/or his friendship with her, that'd be 1 thing but so far you haven't talked about any valid reasons (other than you being selfish) for why your man being there for someone was technically wrong.

2. I get that you wanted to see him on Valentine's day & that you should've been #1 in priority, BUT what would you have done persay his mom or sister needed the help? Would you have made him choose? If this guy's story about his friend being stranded is really true, understand that he can't control the fact that she just so happend to be stranded on Vday. The day it happened was out of his control.

3. You don't trust him. You're so focused on wanting him back just for the sake of having him back that you're completely ignoring the fact that you need to fix ALL insecurities/trust issues within yourself before trying to invite him back into your life. If you don't trust him, that's fine but be honest with yourself about why you don't & from there, start thinking of fixes for that, vs. just wanting him back as a whole.

4. No man likes ultimatums. No man likes to choose. And if he really was telling the truth about his friend being stranded, you just earned yourself the "selfish chick of the year" award. It probably took this situation for him to really realize that you are more selfish than he originally thought. And YES, some men will ABSOLUTELY leave & never come back if they get the sense that they'll only have a peaceful relationship with you if they have to surrender their friendships with everybody else who is ALSO just as important to him.

5. If you don't feel like you were wrong, don't apologize. Don't say something you don't mean. Sure, I'd advise you to maybe recognize that you were more in the wrong than him, BUT if YOU don't see it that way, there's no use in you pretending like you do.

6. Give him some time & space.

7. He probably disappeared b/c instead of texting him that you were sorry, you were texting him that you missed him. Although your "I miss you" texts may have felt good, you still hadn't touched up on the real issues of why you 2 broke up to begin with. He may not agree to come back or to atleast talk to you again until (and not a second before) he sees that you can admit your wrongs & apologize.

8. Personally, I think something's NOT right about his story. But hey, I could be wrong. I'm sure there's way more to the story.

9. I believe his story about his friend, but I don't buy his excuses for why he disappeared & all of the sudden became inconsistent, especially if he's never done this to you in the past.

10. Maybe he is seeing someone else on the side. I mean we can't ignore that some of the excuses he's given you thus far have been excuses that went down in the "Player's Hall of Fame" & that have been used since the beginning of time by men who actually ARE playing their girlfriends!

11. Either way, if him being there for this "friend" of his bothered you THAT much, that indicates to me that you ALREADY DIDN'T trust his judgement for which he calls someone his "friend." Well, I'm hoping that it's his judgement you don't trust vs. this all really being about you being so selfish. If this is all about you being selfish, then I agree with what someone said above...you DON'T deserve him back until you learn what it means to compromise, be selfLESS, be understanding AND be able to handle the fact that everything isn't always going to be about YOU (even on Vday)

12. Are you sure you'd want a man whose quick to ditch/dodge all his friends for you? That wouldn't be a GOOD thing. You hate when he's not there for you or when he ditches you w/o a valid explanation so why are you so ok with him giving his own friends that same feeling?