CANCER MAN I DONT' UNDERSTAND

This topic was created in the Cancer forum by sinder on Saturday, December 16, 2006 and has 24 replies.
I CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHAT IS HAPPENING. I HAVE BEEN GOING OUT WITH THIS MAN FOR ALMOST 5 MONTHS. I THINK HE CARES. HE WRITES ME BEAUTIFUL POEMS. I ONLY SEE HIM ONCE OR TWICE A WEEK BUT WE TALK OR TEXT MESSAGE AT LEAST ONCE EVERYDAY. WE JUST HAD DINNER ON WED AND THINGS GOT HOT AND HEAVY. WE HAVE BEEN INTIMATE TWICE. HE GAVE ME A CD AND WE SPENT ABOUT 2 HOURS JUST TALKING AND JOKING AROUND.

YESTERDAY HE MESSAGED ME HE WAS SWAMPED AT WORK AND I SAID I WOULD CALL HIM. I LEFT TEXT AND VOICE MESSAGES AND HE NEVER CALLED ME LAST NITE. I TRIED TO CALL TODAY AND THE VOICE MAIL CAME ON IMMEDIATELY LIKE THE CELL IS TURNED OFF. I EMAILED AND STILL HAVEN'T HEARD ANYTHING.
HE IS SUPPOSE TO LET ME KNOW ABOUT A VACATION DAY HE HAS COMING UP AND WE WERE GOING TO PLAN THE DAY TOGETHER AND I NEED TO KNOW SO I CAN PLAN THAT DAY IN ADVANCE AS WELL.
IS THIS NORMAL TO BE EXTREMELY HOT AND COLD? I KNOW HE WAS STRESSED OUT AT WORK. DOES THE STRESS MAKE CANCERS WANT TO KEEP TO THEMSELVES?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. SHOULD I JUST EMAIL HIM AND SAY I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS. THIS IS INCONSIDERATE BEHAVIOR. I AM TRYING TO BE UNDERSTANDING BECAUSE THERE IS SO MUCH ABOUT HIM. I AM A PISCES BY THE WAY IF THAT MEANS ANYTHING,,,THANKS ANY ADVICE IS SO APPRECIATED.
I think you should just chill and try to put your mind to something else for the next while. Getting upset and angry is not gonna get you anywhere and might just piss this cancer guy off. I'm saying this to you cos I should do this myself smile
Just don't think the worst of him. There's probably a very mundane explanation for why his phone went straight to voicemail.
THIS JUST SEEMS UNUSUAL BECAUSE HE USUALLY CONTACTS ME DAILY. I KEEP THINKING THERE IS SOMEONE ELSE. I AM TRYING TO CHILL. I JUST FEEL SAD LIKE I CARE MORE THAT THERE IS NOT AN EQUAL BALANCE HERE BETWEEN US. I DON'T WANT TO BE USED. MY FRIENDS SAID THAT HE MAY JUST TAKEN HIS TIME WITH ME TO HAVE SEX WITH ME AND NOW I AM THINKING OF THAT TOO. DOES ANYONE ELSE OUT THERE THINK I AM JUST BEING PARANOID?
You're being a bit paranoid. If you've been together almost 5 months.. you're in good shape. I'm not known to write poetry but if I did, it would be for someone I really cared about. Cancers are known to like their own alone time. I've always thought that when two people spend occasional time away from each other, it's even better when they do end up hooking up. Plus, if you guys have already had sex and it was good, you can really put your mind at ease.
Both of you guys, thanks for your advice. So this is normal for cancers to just duck out of site without warning? if this is normal behavior then i won't worry. i just can't comprehend ducking out in the people of a sentence..........
i am just so not like that. i like people to know whats up, to have a peace of mind and not feel any insecurtiy because i dont like the feeling of confusion (Pisces in me i guess)
SRG- Are you a cancer guy? He writes poetry like some people breathe, its so quick and natural to him. the sex was the best i ever had by the waysmile
Both of you guys, thanks for your advice. So this is normal for cancers to just duck out of site without warning? if this is normal behavior then i won't worry. i just can't comprehend ducking out in the people of a sentence..........
i am just so not like that. i like people to know whats up, to have a peace of mind and not feel any insecurtiy because i dont like the feeling of confusion (Pisces in me i guess)
SRG- Are you a cancer guy? He writes poetry like some people breathe, its so quick and natural to him. the sex was the best i ever had by the waysmile
yeah, i'm a cancer. Just relax and don't worry so much. Maybe even try a bit of playing hard to get.
And I thought > I < was paranoid smile lol Yours is one of the better stories here on dxp hehehehee I used to write my ex poetry too... which I, btw, ran into today! Aaaaaaahhhh he's as fine as ever! Its been so long since I last saw him... wowww my heart froze for a few seconds. Another cancer, yay, he's in town *claps hands* =D
Hey its me again
I finally spoke to him and he said he had a long day at work with so much work that he had to take it home and work on it over the weekend and he had a major migraine and just stopped taking calls etc...I feel like an A**! You guys gave some good advice. i am really liking this man because he is so different. i have been reading about signs etc...and want to try to roll with anything quirky for the sake of all the good stuff that is there.
SRG-the hard to get thing.....i will try it. i won't be so available
RAINING PEANUTS-yes i guess i do seem super paranoid. i am just realizing i really like this dude and don't want to lose it and it is making me act in ways i never felt cause i honestly never liked someone like this before. you know the characteristics like being a great cook etc...i never experienced any man that ever cooked for me before and he is do good at it. i was so appreciative. just the your ex.....hes hot!!!!
sinder, if this person has cooked for you.. you can forget about everything.. the guys in love with you.
"sinder, if this person has cooked for you.. you can forget about everything.. the guys in love with you."
you must be joking
Joking? I'm afraid not..
part of me was hoping you weren't Winking.
I couldn't be more serious.. a cancer cooking for someone is pretty much like telling someone you love them without saying it. Congrats sinder, if this is what you were after, you got it.
srg- Damn i feel lucky! he took me on a picnic and also made me breakfast in bed the first time we were intimate. he also said he would like to make me a real dinner some time soon. it this is love i am totally into it. i hope that this is how they always are and not just trying to impress me. i was going to get him a cookbook for christmas and fold over some recipes that look especially good (and you thought only you cancers were manipulative!smile
Just putting this out there------any recomendations on what a cancer guys really likes for a gift?
srg- Damn i feel lucky! he took me on a picnic and also made me breakfast in bed the first time we were intimate. he also said he would like to make me a real dinner some time soon. it this is love i am totally into it. i hope that this is how they always are and not just trying to impress me. i was going to get him a cookbook for christmas and fold over some recipes that look especially good (and you thought only you cancers were manipulative!smile
Just putting this out there------any recomendations on what a cancer guys really likes for a gift?
Gifts? Try something small, practical and meaningful. OR, just get creative with some lingerie if you know what I mean.. smile
He is into photography. Maybe some albums,that would fit your description of a gift. maybe i can give him a christmas card and say the other gift is not under the tree its under my clothes and have on some holiday lingeriesmile.........great ideas srg! thanks

**i still am going to include that cookbook! If the cooking means love then i want to make sure we keep cookin!
He is into photography. Maybe some albums,that would fit your description of a gift. maybe i can give him a christmas card and say the other gift is not under the tree its under my clothes and have on some holiday lingeriesmile.........great ideas srg! thanks

**i still am going to include that cookbook! If the cooking means love then i want to make sure we keep cookin!
hehe.. just do something unexpected and original. Cookbook is a nice idea or a picture of yourself. Something simple is always good.
This will be our first christmas so i don't want him to forget it. you got me really thinking now.......................smile
Usually when a cancer goes cold something has happened to make us loose interest....sometimes it could be another person and have nothing to do with you (although it will affect you). However, in this case I think that it's too early for you to jump to too many conclusions....he could legitimately be busy. Thank GOD if you've found a cancer that both knows how to love deeply and completely and also give you a little personal space....the latter of the two is often a difficult lesson for us to learn. chill out for another day or two and see what he does...then we you do talk to him...see if he offers up an explanation without you saying anything...you'll know what to do from there.
Cancer LA-- i was thinking it could be another person as well but i didn't want to seem too paranoid. i know for a fact that his ex girlfriend is trying to get him back. it has been confirmed as of today. She keeps emailing and coming up with reasons for them to get together (forgotten items he needs to pick up, things that she wants to talk about in person etc...)
i think the reason we have so much personal space is because of our jobs, we can only see each other at night during the week and maybe on sundays. i will see him tomorrow and will fish around about his absence over the weekend. any tips on how to tell if he is truthful or not is most appreciated if you have the experience in that departmentsmile
Cancer LA-- i was thinking it could be another person as well but i didn't want to seem too paranoid. i know for a fact that his ex girlfriend is trying to get him back. it has been confirmed as of today. She keeps emailing and coming up with reasons for them to get together (forgotten items he needs to pick up, things that she wants to talk about in person etc...)
i think the reason we have so much personal space is because of our jobs, we can only see each other at night during the week and maybe on sundays. i will see him tomorrow and will fish around about his absence over the weekend. any tips on how to tell if he is truthful or not is most appreciated if you have the experience in that departmentsmile