Cancer man is suddenly acting distant and ignoring me, help!!!!!

Posted by emeraldgem

Damn if he wasn't such a fucking wizard in bed I'd kick his ass to the curb (again).

Posted by MysteriousDreamer

Are we talking about the same guy here? I’ve only been dating my Cancer for 2 months, but he has already become distant. He still initiates communication daily, but we used to talk nonstop for hours throughout the day. Now it’s just short responses and I’m lucky if I get 4 texts from him per day. It also takes him hours to respond to me now or sometimes I get no response at all and he used to get back instantly. When I asked him what was wrong? He just responded with he’s tired or busy with work. Which he does work crazy 12 hour shifts....nights, days and weekends. It’s frustrating though as he’s always been consistent before even with this work schedule. Here I am questioning if I got intimate with him too soon as right after that is when this started happening. Sigh...

Posted by Aries4

Guys, I have some updates on this situation, today I wrote to him is everything ok? He responded that he doesn't know himself, I said how can we figure out? and his response was that we need to see each other and talk. and he said that he did change but he doesn't know why so we need to discuss that. so we're meeting tomorrow, and I'm dying now, not knowing what to expect, what are we gonna talk. I guess this is going to be my longest night

Posted by Aries4

Guys, I have some updates on this situation, today I wrote to him is everything ok? He responded that he doesn't know himself, I said how can we figure out? and his response was that we need to see each other and talk. and he said that he did change but he doesn't know why so we need to discuss that. so we're meeting tomorrow, and I'm dying now, not knowing what to expect, what are we gonna talk. I guess this is going to be my longest night

Posted by emeraldgem

I have a term for it - call it "mini-ghosting" when he wants to do something and doesn't want to negotiate, he doesn't respond to texts and does it anyway. But look I need COMMUNICATION and would like something that says something like "Busy with the family this weekend, let's get together after that." And DONE! But no..............nooooooooooooo............too difficult I guess. Frustrating!

Yes...yes...I'm dick-whipped I know. But he IS that good! hahahhaha!

Posted by emeraldgem

"Why does he have to negotiate with you if he wants to do something that doesn't include you?" EXACTLY my point @saggurl88 - he doesn't! I have a feeling that he got negative responses for being upfront with women (from what he tells me) that he doesn't want to risk possible confrontation/bad reaction from me. But I'm not like that at all. Just tell me you got stuff to do because (guess what?) I have stuff to do too!

Posted by emeraldgem

I think we need to form a support group.

Posted by nikkistar

How old are you? How old is he?

Three months, and you guys are in love? Three months and you already deemed him the person to be your first sexual encounter?

Posted by Aries4

Thanks for your support. Currently, I don't know what to do, the worst and the most likely scenario is that he's going to ask to end things as it's what expected after his such behaviour. But I'm not ready for it. I've never felt this happy with a guy. He was all I wanted, and he was treating me so good, he was so loving and caring, he was telling me things that actually made me believe that this is it, it's what I was looking for all my life, in all relationships, and could not find. and now I'm afraid of what is coming next.

Posted by emeraldgem

And *sudden thought* WHY would a sign that is supposed to be sensitive and vulnerable choose to inflict pain on others with their own insensitive behavior? This is the burning question! Are they so worried about protecting themselves that they harm others in the process?

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

Posted by Brittnie

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

What happened? Are you ok??

click to expand

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

Posted by Aries4

Posted by Brittnie

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

What happened? Are you ok??

Thanks for asking, but I don't really know how I feel right now!

We met yesterday and talked about us, he said that he is confused and scared of commitment, he wants to be with me, he still loves me, and when he's with me everything is perfect and he doesn't even want to leave, but when we are apart he starts missing being single and free and he doesn't want to hurt me while cheating or doing something that might hurt me, but he can't be in a committed relationship because of his shitty personality (that's what he said). He said but he was always like this during all his relationships, however, he thought that this time would be different, something special that might change him and that's why he introduced me to his family and friends and said that it's a big deal for him and he did that only once before. He also added that it hurts him too since he does love me and might even regret doing so, but doesn't want to hurt me either so it's better if I find someone who will be ready to love me the way I deserve. Then he suggested us staying friends and said that he doesn't want to lose me. and what is the most strange thing that confused me, is that when we were about to part, he asked me to give him some more time to think and meet again, to talk, because after meeting me he is confused and wants to figure out what he wants.

So now, I'm more confused, I don't know, I still love and care about him, but I don't want someone who's not completely in, who's not 100% sure he wants to be with me, but on the other hand, I understand that he also can be confused since everything happened so fast. Though I want to win him back, I'd love to know that he fought with himself and realized that he is ready to commit to a relationship, to me, but I can't stick around till he decides. Please help me figure out what should I do that would work best for me.

click to expand

Posted by Aries4

Posted by Brittnie

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

What happened? Are you ok??

Thanks for asking, but I don't really know how I feel right now!

We met yesterday and talked about us, he said that he is confused and scared of commitment, he wants to be with me, he still loves me, and when he's with me everything is perfect and he doesn't even want to leave, but when we are apart he starts missing being single and free and he doesn't want to hurt me while cheating or doing something that might hurt me, but he can't be in a committed relationship because of his shitty personality (that's what he said). He said but he was always like this during all his relationships, however, he thought that this time would be different, something special that might change him and that's why he introduced me to his family and friends and said that it's a big deal for him and he did that only once before. He also added that it hurts him too since he does love me and might even regret doing so, but doesn't want to hurt me either so it's better if I find someone who will be ready to love me the way I deserve. Then he suggested us staying friends and said that he doesn't want to lose me. and what is the most strange thing that confused me, is that when we were about to part, he asked me to give him some more time to think and meet again, to talk, because after meeting me he is confused and wants to figure out what he wants.

So now, I'm more confused, I don't know, I still love and care about him, but I don't want someone who's not completely in, who's not 100% sure he wants to be with me, but on the other hand, I understand that he also can be confused since everything happened so fast. Though I want to win him back, I'd love to know that he fought with himself and realized that he is ready to commit to a relationship, to me, but I can't stick around till he decides. Please help me figure out what should I do that would work best for me.

click to expand

Posted by Brittnie

Posted by Aries4

Posted by Brittnie

Posted by Aries4

My Cancer guy is driving me crazy. I'm an Aries woman and I'm trying to patient with him but it's hard.

We've been dating for like 3 months, we really hit it off right away. we just naturally clicked. the attraction was always there since we met. However, during this period we 've dealt with the problem of his mood swings when he had suddenly changed or disappeared for no apparent reason. But we went through it all thanks to my doing the first step, which led to his coming back and being as caring and loving as possible. So recently everything was just perfect, he would always tell me he loved me, that he had never felt like this before with anyone else, he always took me out on dates and out with his friends... I met his family. he always referred to me as his girlfriend. we spent a lot of time together, he always made time for me, even when he had work all day he came to see me afterwards. We've even been intimate together and he was my first, so it was a big deal for me and he knew it. However, this past week he has been very distant with me. He doesn't call or text like he used to and when I do he ignores my texts or responds with short answers without any enthusiasm. I asked what's wrong he said that nothing was wrong that he is loaded with work and is very tired. He actually is busy, since he's been working like 24/7 but being busy did not stop him before, and anyway I believe that if you care for someone you can find time for just one small sweer goodnight and good morning text. And his behaviour is very strange considering that he was completely different before and we were talking every single day. why this sudden change? I am very confused!!!

What happened? Are you ok??

Thanks for asking, but I don't really know how I feel right now!

We met yesterday and talked about us, he said that he is confused and scared of commitment, he wants to be with me, he still loves me, and when he's with me everything is perfect and he doesn't even want to leave, but when we are apart he starts missing being single and free and he doesn't want to hurt me while cheating or doing something that might hurt me, but he can't be in a committed relationship because of his shitty personality (that's what he said). He said but he was always like this during all his relationships, however, he thought that this time would be different, something special that might change him and that's why he introduced me to his family and friends and said that it's a big deal for him and he did that only once before. He also added that it hurts him too since he does love me and might even regret doing so, but doesn't want to hurt me either so it's better if I find someone who will be ready to love me the way I deserve. Then he suggested us staying friends and said that he doesn't want to lose me. and what is the most strange thing that confused me, is that when we were about to part, he asked me to give him some more time to think and meet again, to talk, because after meeting me he is confused and wants to figure out what he wants.

So now, I'm more confused, I don't know, I still love and care about him, but I don't want someone who's not completely in, who's not 100% sure he wants to be with me, but on the other hand, I understand that he also can be confused since everything happened so fast. Though I want to win him back, I'd love to know that he fought with himself and realized that he is ready to commit to a relationship, to me, but I can't stick around till he decides. Please help me figure out what should I do that would work best for me.

I'm sorry you don't know how to feel, I'm glad you both talked some though. I know it's really tough but I'm glad this guy is so honest with you, especially for a Cancer!!! It means he really cares about you, he wants to be close and he doesn't want to hurt you. I think it would be best to just focus on other things before you two talk again and I think that you should since he does really care about you. I have a commitment phobia as well so I understand where he is coming from. I watched a video a while back to figure out why I was like this "having a parent that controlled everything I do" I mean, a really over protective, narcissistic parents who only care about themselves and not about the child. So we grow up subconsciously thinking that no one has our best interests at heart or they will take our identity away (enmeshment trauma). Cheating also has nothing to do with whether someone loves you or not. Typically people have needs and they aren't aware of what they are because our society doesn't even begin to touch base on emotional, psychical needs etc. We grow up being taught to put everyone else first while being resentful in the subconscious. I really wish therapy wasn't expensive because we really all do have childhood wounds that need healing. You can look for that at where Chiron is in Astrology and the house.

If you do move on, I am sure you will find someone similar who won't cheat on you, who knows if this guy will ever figure it out but maybe you two can help each other. I would look into psychology and stuff, I became obsessed when my ex left and I was trying to figure out why I was such a fuck up. You can really learn a lot about yourself and your partner. I think he is worth you both trying to work it out but it's ultimately down to you 2.

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Posted by ReddmannScorch

If you gave him the pussy then dats one of the reasons you missing him. Aries tend to dwell on past fuck sessions or reminensce. Secondly cancers sense you hiding sumping he probably would not say it now but he will. Thirdly if we get close to you we pull back because something you did may have reminded him of a previous relationship that hurt him. Cancers love their space to think and reflect. Aries back off for now and go out with guy friends, let him see it on whatsapp or social media. He gonna quickly come out. If yall official tell him and just cook for him. Wow did not know cancers and aries had a thing.