cancer men please help me
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by sinder on Monday, December 11, 2006 and has 11 replies.
i have been seeing this cancer guy for about 4 months. we only see each other about once a week because of our schedules and i am trying to determine what he wants from me (i am a pisces by the way and have never dated a cancer b4) when i see him he gives me little things like cd's that he has burned for me or writes me poetry but he never pays for my dinner or lunch when we go out. are we just freinds with benefits is what i am wondering. we slept together for the first time about a week ago and it was wonderful. we talk to each other just about everyday on the phone and i tell him i miss him. he says he was thinking of me but he won't say he misses me. and when i say i miss him he finds a way to cut our conversation and we hang up within a few minutes but he still wants to meet for dinner this week. this is weird. i dont; know where i stand.
please cancer men help me or women familiar with this! i am not sure what to feel so i feel like i want to clam up soon.
please cancer men help me or women familiar with this! i am not sure what to feel so i feel like i want to clam up soon.
Sinder:
Do you feel like he's not as serious about you because he won't pay for your dinner or lunch? I don't know if I would go as far as basing whether or not he is serious about you because he won't pay for lunch or dinner for you. Now if he was making you fit the bill for you both, umm big no no. You might need to see if you can have a talk with him regarding where you two are headed and where you stand right now. If you know you don't want to be labled as the "friends with benefits" then let him know this. If you need something more, let him know. Don't keep yourself in limbo and on pins and needles with your emotions- not good for us Pisces. The Cancer I'm with would do those same sweet gestures- burn CDs for me, only I wrote the poetry to him, lol.
Also too you have to understand with them they take their time when it comes to getting serious because I went through a period with my Cancer where I would tell him I loved him but he wouldn't say it back and it drove me nuts, BUT he was still coming to see me and calling me and showing interest in growing our love. We were a good 4 or 5 months, maybe even longer, before he finally started saying it back to me.
If you know for a fact that he is not seeing anyone else the same way he is seeing you,then you can start to feel more confident in where you two are headed becaues this is a good sign. Don't torture yourself by getting into something where it's "open" you know him not just seeing you exclusively . I can't stand these kind of things and for us Pisces we just can't deal with these kind of arrangements. Either someone is into us or they are not.
Sinder just communicate with him and try to be patient with a Cancer- if he building something with you in a genuine way, from his heart, no games, it will be worth it if it turns into something lasting.
Do you feel like he's not as serious about you because he won't pay for your dinner or lunch? I don't know if I would go as far as basing whether or not he is serious about you because he won't pay for lunch or dinner for you. Now if he was making you fit the bill for you both, umm big no no. You might need to see if you can have a talk with him regarding where you two are headed and where you stand right now. If you know you don't want to be labled as the "friends with benefits" then let him know this. If you need something more, let him know. Don't keep yourself in limbo and on pins and needles with your emotions- not good for us Pisces. The Cancer I'm with would do those same sweet gestures- burn CDs for me, only I wrote the poetry to him, lol.
Also too you have to understand with them they take their time when it comes to getting serious because I went through a period with my Cancer where I would tell him I loved him but he wouldn't say it back and it drove me nuts, BUT he was still coming to see me and calling me and showing interest in growing our love. We were a good 4 or 5 months, maybe even longer, before he finally started saying it back to me.
If you know for a fact that he is not seeing anyone else the same way he is seeing you,then you can start to feel more confident in where you two are headed becaues this is a good sign. Don't torture yourself by getting into something where it's "open" you know him not just seeing you exclusively . I can't stand these kind of things and for us Pisces we just can't deal with these kind of arrangements. Either someone is into us or they are not.
Sinder just communicate with him and try to be patient with a Cancer- if he building something with you in a genuine way, from his heart, no games, it will be worth it if it turns into something lasting.
obpisces
thank you for your input. this is giving me more a direction. i will see him wed for dinner and i don't want to pressure him but i do want to know where i stand. any tactful way to do this is appreciated. also, i just found out he may be moving to another state for a job that he is being offered right now. this is not 100 percent but it is on the table. i don;t want to get hurt. i have never felt for a man like i do for this man.
to antibling-are you a cancer male? how do you know about cancers being tight?
thank you for your input. this is giving me more a direction. i will see him wed for dinner and i don't want to pressure him but i do want to know where i stand. any tactful way to do this is appreciated. also, i just found out he may be moving to another state for a job that he is being offered right now. this is not 100 percent but it is on the table. i don;t want to get hurt. i have never felt for a man like i do for this man.
to antibling-are you a cancer male? how do you know about cancers being tight?
"and I'm Scorpio...or Libra if I don't want people to keep their distance"
lol Bling
Sinder:
Hmm that moving to another state deal could be very hard. I hope it's not the case but if so, gee- I speak only for myself but that would be too hard on me. The only way I can see being able to deal with that was if I knew without a doubt he wanted a future with me. Then I could even see the possibility of making a career move and going to the same place he would be. It's even more important now then that you have a serious talk with him. Don't worry about being tactful- speak from your heart. I don't see any reason why you would have a hard time being direct with gentleness. Let your heart speak. Just try to prepare yourself for the possibility that it may not turn out as you like- and believe me Sinder, fellow Pisces female here, when we want something to work out, I know how tortuous and hurtful that can be for us to deal with if it dosen't. So I am not saying this to you without knowing fully the hurt feelings and hardness that comes with facing that.
I hope for the best for you though and your Cancer and that it works out- fingers crossed
lol Bling
Sinder:
Hmm that moving to another state deal could be very hard. I hope it's not the case but if so, gee- I speak only for myself but that would be too hard on me. The only way I can see being able to deal with that was if I knew without a doubt he wanted a future with me. Then I could even see the possibility of making a career move and going to the same place he would be. It's even more important now then that you have a serious talk with him. Don't worry about being tactful- speak from your heart. I don't see any reason why you would have a hard time being direct with gentleness. Let your heart speak. Just try to prepare yourself for the possibility that it may not turn out as you like- and believe me Sinder, fellow Pisces female here, when we want something to work out, I know how tortuous and hurtful that can be for us to deal with if it dosen't. So I am not saying this to you without knowing fully the hurt feelings and hardness that comes with facing that.
I hope for the best for you though and your Cancer and that it works out- fingers crossed
obpisces
once again, i see you speak from experience. thanks for this advice. i will see him this wed and i will comment on the post as to how it went. honestly, i am not used to doing the pursuing like this and it really is difficult because i don't want him to think i am needy etc...(we know we feel that way at times and i really resent that part of my nature)
i have read some stuff about cancer and that they are very indirect. he actually told me very shortly after we met that he was cancer, like he really wanted me to know it, becasue he also said that he is trying to open up more because he had a tendency to hide in his shell because he is cancerian. matter of fact, that comment is what led me to study up on astrology and led me to this site
i have been trying to go by actions and not by words for his sake. but now i need to satisfy myself by him being direct. i just don't want to upset him because i know in the recent past that he gets either flustered or clams up when i dig a little deeper. i know he is very sensitive because of the poetry he writes. i know he has not dated much because he has focused on his career. he has been with 2 women before me. the last relationship ended only 2 weeks before we actually met with each other, it was almost a year long.
all i can say is there is just something about him that makes me melt and we both agree when we are together we feel really good. he told me he felt elated in my presence. i think he is as shocked as i am to have met someone and be strongly drawn to. he saw me and liked me for several months before he let me know. for me, this came just out of the blue. )we like to hold hands and cuddle. i feel like a pea in a pod when we are together and i never believed people really felt like this. just in movies. this is so new to me and i am afraid to lose it.
i have dated, gemini, aquarius, aries and capricorn and am finding out that astrologically speaking, i have been missing the boat all along. i feel like can relate to someone on a deep level for the first time in my life and now they may leave.
obpisces- i appreciate you listening to my thoughts and concerns and i will put your advice to good use tomorrow.
ps- i never answered the question about the dinner bill...we split it
once again, i see you speak from experience. thanks for this advice. i will see him this wed and i will comment on the post as to how it went. honestly, i am not used to doing the pursuing like this and it really is difficult because i don't want him to think i am needy etc...(we know we feel that way at times and i really resent that part of my nature)
i have read some stuff about cancer and that they are very indirect. he actually told me very shortly after we met that he was cancer, like he really wanted me to know it, becasue he also said that he is trying to open up more because he had a tendency to hide in his shell because he is cancerian. matter of fact, that comment is what led me to study up on astrology and led me to this site
i have been trying to go by actions and not by words for his sake. but now i need to satisfy myself by him being direct. i just don't want to upset him because i know in the recent past that he gets either flustered or clams up when i dig a little deeper. i know he is very sensitive because of the poetry he writes. i know he has not dated much because he has focused on his career. he has been with 2 women before me. the last relationship ended only 2 weeks before we actually met with each other, it was almost a year long.
all i can say is there is just something about him that makes me melt and we both agree when we are together we feel really good. he told me he felt elated in my presence. i think he is as shocked as i am to have met someone and be strongly drawn to. he saw me and liked me for several months before he let me know. for me, this came just out of the blue. )we like to hold hands and cuddle. i feel like a pea in a pod when we are together and i never believed people really felt like this. just in movies. this is so new to me and i am afraid to lose it.
i have dated, gemini, aquarius, aries and capricorn and am finding out that astrologically speaking, i have been missing the boat all along. i feel like can relate to someone on a deep level for the first time in my life and now they may leave.
obpisces- i appreciate you listening to my thoughts and concerns and i will put your advice to good use tomorrow.
ps- i never answered the question about the dinner bill...we split it
"when we want something to work out, I know how tortuous and hurtful that can be for us to deal with if it dosen't"
oh Jesus!(amen!) sooo true! watch your heart and hold on to it for dear life only giving it as needed,please! I went through the same thing with a cancer man, exact thing from the beginning..and he just never got around to committing which tore me up!
oh Jesus!(amen!) sooo true! watch your heart and hold on to it for dear life only giving it as needed,please!
I went through the same thing with a cancer man, exact thing from the beginning..and he just never got around to committing which tore me up!no I can't say that sinder, I'm sorry. I think life is about taking chances, and how much fun would life be if we all just held back everything, and not ventured into the "what if's" and "should've's"...that's the beauty of us pisces women, we take chances again and again, even if we've been burned before! and you should! good luck girl! I really hope he's everything you want! -nic
-nicHey piscesgrl
just like me you gave two opinions! i think you are right about going for it even though it might break my heart. i am going to tell him how much i really feel and see if we are on the same page. if he is quite or gets flustered about my wanting to know his feelings for me, i will drop it and figure out if i want to continue on. i already feel like i love him. i made love to him for the first time last week. if he is going to leave town, i am not sure if i want to do that again. i am very particular about that stuff out of curiousity, what signs did your cancer guy show that made you aware he was ready to end it? knowlege is power! especially for this guy who seems to have a lot of mysteries and things he keeps inside.
just like me you gave two opinions! i think you are right about going for it even though it might break my heart. i am going to tell him how much i really feel and see if we are on the same page. if he is quite or gets flustered about my wanting to know his feelings for me, i will drop it and figure out if i want to continue on. i already feel like i love him. i made love to him for the first time last week. if he is going to leave town, i am not sure if i want to do that again. i am very particular about that stuff
out of curiousity, what signs did your cancer guy show that made you aware he was ready to end it? knowlege is power! especially for this guy who seems to have a lot of mysteries and things he keeps inside."Canceras are tight ers with money though"
are we? i don't think so. i always am more than happy to pick up the check with anyone... friends, family, females...
however, i don't like to be taken advantage of.
are we? i don't think so. i always am more than happy to pick up the check with anyone... friends, family, females...
however, i don't like to be taken advantage of.
Hey piscesgrl
just like me you gave two opinions! i think you are right about going for it even though it might break my heart. i am going to tell him how much i really feel and see if we are on the same page. if he is quite or gets flustered about my wanting to know his feelings for me, i will drop it and figure out if i want to continue on. i already feel like i love him. i made love to him for the first time last week. if he is going to leave town, i am not sure if i want to do that again. i am very particular about that stuff out of curiousity, what signs did your cancer guy show that made you aware he was ready to end it? knowlege is power! especially for this guy who seems to have a lot of mysteries and things he keeps inside.
just like me you gave two opinions! i think you are right about going for it even though it might break my heart. i am going to tell him how much i really feel and see if we are on the same page. if he is quite or gets flustered about my wanting to know his feelings for me, i will drop it and figure out if i want to continue on. i already feel like i love him. i made love to him for the first time last week. if he is going to leave town, i am not sure if i want to do that again. i am very particular about that stuff
out of curiousity, what signs did your cancer guy show that made you aware he was ready to end it? knowlege is power! especially for this guy who seems to have a lot of mysteries and things he keeps inside.
There is this Cancer man who I think has an affair going on with a married woman. I can sense it, because whenever she sees me talking to him, she listens to everything. I love him but he doesn't know it. I believe he senses it, but doesn't reveal anything. Yes, we flirt often. I am curious though, does he love this married woman who has a child or is he with her for sex? She gets jealous whenever she sees us talking. Not to toot my own horn, but I am very sexy! Any insight? Thanks guys!
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