Did I do something wrong? Im not a cancer but..
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by MrsLibra on Saturday, April 11, 2009 and has 6 replies.
guy I was talking to is.
Ive been lurking and decided to join cause this has been really bothering me with this guy. I'll try and keep things short
We started talking online in Dec. He gave me his number, we started texting and he'd call me from time to time. We arranged for me to go see him. I get there and he is so sweet. We climbed into bed and he just held me, kissed my nose and forehead. Yes, we slept together BUT it wasnt him that initiated it. It was me. Long story as to why I did.
I leave, we still talked ever so often. He'd text me early in the morning just being silly. We decided to meet up again last weekend. On April Fools day, I played a joke. I texted him saying I had burnt the cookies I had made him and then texted him back saying I hadnt and that it was an April Fools prank. I was due to fly out that Friday, the 3rd. Arrived at the hotel, texted and called him all that weekend. No answer!! I emailed him the day I left explaining how hurt I was and contiued emailing him up until a few days ago. Still no response.
Could my playing the April Fools joke, really caused him to start ignoring me like this?
Maybe I should back up a little. I lost my husband last Nov. Had no intentions on meeting anyone but for some reason me and this guy connected. I wasnt looking for anything serious and neither was he due to being hurt by someone he dated. It had been a yr and 1/2 since I had been with anyone intimately due to my husbands illness. He had brain cancer. So thats how it was I that ended up initiating us sleeping together. He would have been perfectly happy just laying with me all snuggled up like we were.
I drink, quite a bit now, so Id email him with everything that I was going through emotionally BUT the last time I did, which was about 2 or 3 days before we met up, I told him that I thought it was maybe a bad idea with us meeting again and he emailed me back, saying that we'd talk once I got there. Then like I stated earlier, things changed after the April Fools prank. I wasnt trying to insult him or anything.
I know I maybe shouldnt even , especially with my having to deal with the loss of my husband, but Im the type of person that doesnt like feeling like Ive hurt someone.
Ive been lurking and decided to join cause this has been really bothering me with this guy. I'll try and keep things short
We started talking online in Dec. He gave me his number, we started texting and he'd call me from time to time. We arranged for me to go see him. I get there and he is so sweet. We climbed into bed and he just held me, kissed my nose and forehead. Yes, we slept together BUT it wasnt him that initiated it. It was me. Long story as to why I did.
I leave, we still talked ever so often. He'd text me early in the morning just being silly. We decided to meet up again last weekend. On April Fools day, I played a joke. I texted him saying I had burnt the cookies I had made him and then texted him back saying I hadnt and that it was an April Fools prank. I was due to fly out that Friday, the 3rd. Arrived at the hotel, texted and called him all that weekend. No answer!! I emailed him the day I left explaining how hurt I was and contiued emailing him up until a few days ago. Still no response.
Could my playing the April Fools joke, really caused him to start ignoring me like this?
Maybe I should back up a little. I lost my husband last Nov. Had no intentions on meeting anyone but for some reason me and this guy connected. I wasnt looking for anything serious and neither was he due to being hurt by someone he dated. It had been a yr and 1/2 since I had been with anyone intimately due to my husbands illness. He had brain cancer. So thats how it was I that ended up initiating us sleeping together. He would have been perfectly happy just laying with me all snuggled up like we were.
I drink, quite a bit now, so Id email him with everything that I was going through emotionally BUT the last time I did, which was about 2 or 3 days before we met up, I told him that I thought it was maybe a bad idea with us meeting again and he emailed me back, saying that we'd talk once I got there. Then like I stated earlier, things changed after the April Fools prank. I wasnt trying to insult him or anything.
I know I maybe shouldnt even , especially with my having to deal with the loss of my husband, but Im the type of person that doesnt like feeling like Ive hurt someone.
cookies? ...cookies?
...YOU APRIL FOOLED ABOUT COOKIES!?!?!?!? WTF!?
LOL I'm just kidding with you. But any guy who is acting this immature (and ignoring you) about an April Fools joke like this, I wouldn't waste my time worrying too much about. There is clearly something else making him back off.
Maybe you told him too many things, about you, too soon. Not everyone is ready to learn about all of the bones
a person might have in your closet, until they're comfortable enough around you to know why/how those bones ended up there.
That's the only reason I can think of, that would be a halfway reasonable explanation for that kind of behavior.
If that's NOT it... I would just let it go. You probably have too many other things on your mind to focus all of your energy on someone who would ignore you. I think its very nice of you to be concerned. But if you're trying to make things right and they won't give you the chance... the hell with it. I will apologize for being wrong. But unless I'm reeeeeaaally at fault for something I shouldn't have done, I'll be damned if I'm going to chase you down to do so.
...YOU APRIL FOOLED ABOUT COOKIES!?!?!?!? WTF!?
LOL I'm just kidding with you. But any guy who is acting this immature (and ignoring you) about an April Fools joke like this, I wouldn't waste my time worrying too much about. There is clearly something else making him back off.
Maybe you told him too many things, about you, too soon. Not everyone is ready to learn about all of the bones
a person might have in your closet, until they're comfortable enough around you to know why/how those bones ended up there.
That's the only reason I can think of, that would be a halfway reasonable explanation for that kind of behavior.
If that's NOT it... I would just let it go. You probably have too many other things on your mind to focus all of your energy on someone who would ignore you. I think its very nice of you to be concerned. But if you're trying to make things right and they won't give you the chance... the hell with it. I will apologize for being wrong. But unless I'm reeeeeaaally at fault for something I shouldn't have done, I'll be damned if I'm going to chase you down to do so.
Im the original author. Somehow I was having touble logging in and I know I was typing in the right password.
@ broken_shell - I know..Im not good at pranks, that was all I had. LOL! Maybe I did reveal a lil bit too much, too soon. I also wanted to add that he was about to deploy, which is why we agreed to meet before he did. Maybe he decided seeing me was going to be too much before I left.
@ lou.m. - This whole thing has been confusing and I try not to think about the situation but its hard cause my dang personality trait makes it hard for me to let go of something if I feel like Ive hurt someone. But being that he isnt talking to me, I dont know if I did. Im working on trying not to drink so much. I really am. Youre not the only person that has said this to me
Im just gonna have to pray about it and find a way to let it go. I went back and looked at my messages to him and the Very last one was a little after midnight, the Friday that I was to leave to meet him. It was about my feeling like whomever he met was going to be blessed to have him. Something deep down in me tells me he is with someone, which would be an issue for me, cause I dont mess with another woman, man. Maybe he was feeling guilty about us meeting again.
Thank you both for replying cause yall are so right. If I had done something, he should have told me and if I hadnt, all it took was an email just telling me what happened. I sent him a message via Myspace, which he could have read but didnt cause he did sign in the day after I sent it. Oh well!!
@ broken_shell - I know..Im not good at pranks, that was all I had. LOL! Maybe I did reveal a lil bit too much, too soon. I also wanted to add that he was about to deploy, which is why we agreed to meet before he did. Maybe he decided seeing me was going to be too much before I left.
@ lou.m. - This whole thing has been confusing and I try not to think about the situation but its hard cause my dang personality trait makes it hard for me to let go of something if I feel like Ive hurt someone. But being that he isnt talking to me, I dont know if I did. Im working on trying not to drink so much. I really am. Youre not the only person that has said this to me
Im just gonna have to pray about it and find a way to let it go. I went back and looked at my messages to him and the Very last one was a little after midnight, the Friday that I was to leave to meet him. It was about my feeling like whomever he met was going to be blessed to have him. Something deep down in me tells me he is with someone, which would be an issue for me, cause I dont mess with another woman, man. Maybe he was feeling guilty about us meeting again.
Thank you both for replying cause yall are so right. If I had done something, he should have told me and if I hadnt, all it took was an email just telling me what happened. I sent him a message via Myspace, which he could have read but didnt cause he did sign in the day after I sent it. Oh well!!
oops..Maybe he decided seeing me was going to be too much before I left.
That should read: Maybe he decided seeing me was going to be too much before HE left.
That should read: Maybe he decided seeing me was going to be too much before HE left.
@ lou.m - I really appreciate what you had to say. I guess when I was lurking and reading about Cancer men, I thought maybe he was 'hiding' cause I had hurt him in some way. When we talked, texted and met, he fit part of the "Cancer male" to a tee, which is part of the reason why I was taken aback by his actions.
I never really gave too much stock into Zodiac signs but Ive been reading mine and was like wow. Alot about my sign, Libra, is actually right. LOL!! Kinda scary in a way.
Hope you and everyone had a wonderful Easter and again, thank you for responding.
I never really gave too much stock into Zodiac signs but Ive been reading mine and was like wow. Alot about my sign, Libra, is actually right. LOL!! Kinda scary in a way.
Hope you and everyone had a wonderful Easter and again, thank you for responding.
It may be YOU flying to see him and initiating the relationship forward my be causing him to back off. Let him do some initiating. Let him move things forward. At his own pace you say? Um, yes, at his own pace. If he progresses in three month increments, he is trying to improve and move things forward. If longer than 3 months, back off and do your own thing.
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