Help!!
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by Libracancer on Wednesday, April 20, 2016 and has 18 replies.
I'm a libra married to a cancer male. Been together for 4 years. Marriage started to go down hill for the pass 4 months. After marriage I discovered afew really bad habits and one was stealing. It got out of hand sometimes. Stealing at work mostly. Tried advising him to stop. But he'll always push me away. Communications between us is never good. Last week, out of anger from his coldness and mood swings, I asked for a divorce. He totally ignored me. I tried talking to him about our marriage but he refused as usual and said he wants a divorce too because he wants to do whatever he wants and he is done. I told him I was sorry but he doesn't respond. We're still living together. What should I do? He is ignoring me. I give him the space and not talk about what's happening. How should I go about? It's the first time he is doing this. Help.
He doesn't want a divorce, been all through this last year with my cancer hubby, hes just hurt you asked him, let him sulk, you've apologised, he wont talk until hes ready, wont listen to you, stubborn as mules! 😠I was desperate to leave him last year, really had enough (no joking) hadn't been near me for 8 years by that time, he did everything in his power to stop me leaving him when it came to the crunch.
Just leave him to sulk, read his moods, you'll know when he wants to talk, have a beer with him hell open up 😊
Just leave him to sulk, read his moods, you'll know when he wants to talk, have a beer with him hell open up 😊
Wow! Thats some amazing insight into living with a cancer man! Piscespoppy and Libracancer guess you need to help out the several women who need help figuring out these men. Maybe a new topic called "Married to a cancer man"
have been reading tbis forum to understand a cancer friend for a long time. Definitely given him the benefit of doubt but his behaviour is appalling! I thought this was limited to friends, girlfriends, partners and most the guys around here are cery helpful but it seems a tad bit selfish. Looks like things dont change post marriage either. Its not space or rejection, its them having their own way. This sounds like a rough ride!
have been reading tbis forum to understand a cancer friend for a long time. Definitely given him the benefit of doubt but his behaviour is appalling! I thought this was limited to friends, girlfriends, partners and most the guys around here are cery helpful but it seems a tad bit selfish. Looks like things dont change post marriage either. Its not space or rejection, its them having their own way. This sounds like a rough ride!
Lol! He met me today from work, I work in a sports and social club in the kitchen, we had a couple drinks and a chuckle, he'd brought me some karamel sutra ice cream as a treat, we've been kissing a cuddling like a couple kids 😠its not all bad, but everything is on there moods, you just have to learn to not take there moods personally 😊
Hes just showing me is poorley arthritic thumb poor boy, hes in a mother me mood today, I'm all sympathetic, he can be so sweet 😊
Props for handling the moods. My cancer ex use to drive me up the wall with his mood swings and his way of handling emotions. Silent treatment....
Oh, that's great sagiluv, yes it does seem to help if you have tons of loyalty and patience 😊
My husband is an extremely hard worker, very protective of us too. The godfather type husband they are, don't mess with their family 👪.
kleptomaniac
Piecespoppy: he told me again today that he really wants to leave. And that he has been unhappy for awhile and he doesn't know why. He said it isn't me but its him. He doesn't know what he wants now. He told me if I think he deserve happiness I should let him go. I just stared at him while he talk, trying to take it all in. I broke into a million pieces hearing those words. I asked him if I've done anything wrong and that if I haven done enough. He said I've done everything and was very patient with him. Always by his side but he is still not happy and he doesn't know why and pushed me away and says lets talk again another day. I was speechless and couldn't stop crying. He still sleeps with me though. What should I do? I'm devastated.. ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Told him we should start all over again and I could help him through it. And figure it out together. That we should at least try gg for marriage Counselling but he refuses. I gave him space and time. He still thinks he wants to leave even if I've done all I could and that I've been patient. This is so confusing and crazy. It's marriage. Desperate.
Why do Libras and Cancers keep falling into this train wreck?
He feels not good enough for you because you don't like the stealing and made it clear its got to stop, so hes probably feeling a bit insecure, talk to him again in a couple of days, give him some space, be nice to him no matter what he says, and go about your businesses as normal.
My husband did this to me once years ago when we were first living together, wanted to split up, he said he would hurt me, he wasn't good enough for me bla bla, I was upset obviously, so wrote him a lovely letter pointing out all the things I love about him, how good we are together and everything, packed my stuff and left him, went to stay with my mum. 2 days later with no contact, I got a text "come home please" and he hasn't done it since.
I'm not saying this will work for you, but perhaps you need some time apart to miss each other, its the best way to know what you really want.
My husband did this to me once years ago when we were first living together, wanted to split up, he said he would hurt me, he wasn't good enough for me bla bla, I was upset obviously, so wrote him a lovely letter pointing out all the things I love about him, how good we are together and everything, packed my stuff and left him, went to stay with my mum. 2 days later with no contact, I got a text "come home please" and he hasn't done it since.
I'm not saying this will work for you, but perhaps you need some time apart to miss each other, its the best way to know what you really want.
I totally understand what you're saying. We leave out of the country and we only have each other. There is no where to go u less he resigns and go home. I'm giving him space. I wrote him a couple of letters but he doesn't respond. My mum passed away afew months ago and I do not have anyone to go back to. She was my bestftiend, my mum, my confider.. My Husband has been the only one I turn to and now he wants to leave.. I'm lost and alone. Alone in a foreign land.. I dun even know where I can go.. Depressed.
Coincidently, I found that letter behind the picture frame last year of his favorite picture of me 😊 didn't know he kept it all those years.
I'm hoping that he is just going through one of his Super crazy mood swings and that he'll not leave. Been through too much and it's crazy how he can so readily let it go. I hope he'll get back to me soon and not leave.
That puts a whole new picture on it..? How old are you both.? And I'm sorry you don't have your mum around x
Hopefully its just a mood swing like you say, keep us posted, your welcome to private message me if you like x
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