IM GOING INSANE BECAUSE OF MY CANCER EX BOYFRIEND

Signed Up: Mar 02, 2014
Comments: 368 · Posts: 2669 · Topics: 7

Ohh wow LOL, no seriously this situation seems like a huge cluster fuq. You wasn't into him, so he found someone else who was. I mean if it was meant to be, you two would still be together. He's a Ex for a reason. Why chase after someone you know isn't freely giving you ANY attention. I sure wouldn't, because if a Crab really cares about you, it's hard to let go. Even if you lied or whatever. If the feelings are there, our Claws stay clamped on to you. If you screwed up with a Cancer, the only way to win a Crab back is with Actions. Words aren't going to get you far with a hurt Cancer. He with someone else now. So if you really care about him, let him be happy with who he wants

Signed Up: Mar 02, 2014
Comments: 368 · Posts: 2669 · Topics: 7

LOL & next time, you might not wanna spam the Crab with your relationship problems. We can get really Cranky if someone keeps forcing themselves on us OR being really pushy. So take it easy ok 😉

Cancerbabe

@Cancerbabe

Signed Up: May 24, 2013
Comments: 0 · Posts: 207 · Topics: 10

Posted by Ssasy
Cancers do NOT let go that easily unless they are totally fed up....

But even then, if you ignore him or dont even reach out he will get curious and reach out to you.

this!!!

Redd Scorcher

@ReddmannScorch

11 Years500+ Posts

Signed Up: Jan 19, 2014
Comments: 3 · Posts: 873 · Topics: 41

TRix are for kids, i like cereal.You sound like the typical flirty leo, it's sort of a disrespect to us cancers if you "WERE" really in a relationship. Better of as a fuck buddy........ seriously. If you with me when you drunk you should be ALL over me. Bump n Grind. And you janeirene can u cook up a spell for Spain in the world cup.OOOppss too late. They really disappointed me. Ah well still have france.

Redd Scorcher

@ReddmannScorch

11 Years500+ Posts

Signed Up: Jan 19, 2014
Comments: 3 · Posts: 873 · Topics: 41

he he he had tuh do this.... if i aint do it i aint name scorch,lol. Due to the title of this post

Signed Up: Jun 17, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 11 · Topics: 3

Thank you all for your words of wisdom. Ill contemplate on this. But should i still give him the gift i bought him a month ago? It is his birthday next week. It costs pretty much (for me). I want to give it to him because i saved up for that. But Im hesitating also because i dont know what his reaction will be. We are friends now. Though i still have deep feelings for him and he knows that.

cancerlady33

@cancerlady33

Signed Up: Jan 07, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 146 · Topics: 6

Yes you totally blew it. Cancers cherish trust. Once we are official (and sometimes even before that) we are FIERCELY loyal. So depending upon how much he likes/loves you, you either have absolutely no chance or you can possibly win him back (over a long period of time and through a whole lot of demonstrations of your "love"). What are you getting for his bday and how will you give it to him? And you should think about reasons why he can actually trust you ever again because you getting drunk and then flirting with other guys seems like a personality issue of yours (and those don't just go away overnight).

Signed Up: Jun 17, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 11 · Topics: 3

Posted by cancerlady33
Yes you totally blew it. Cancers cherish trust. Once we are official (and sometimes even before that) we are FIERCELY loyal. So depending upon how much he likes/loves you, you either have absolutely no chance or you can possibly win him back (over a long period of time and through a whole lot of demonstrations of your "love"). What are you getting for his bday and how will you give it to him? And you should think about reasons why he can actually trust you ever again because you getting drunk and then flirting with other guys seems like a personality issue of yours (and those don't just go away overnight).

I got him a DJ controller which is roughly around $ 900. We're friends and Im planning to give it to him next week with a heartfelt letter. Actually, he knows that I bought a gift for him even before we broke up coz he accidentally read it on my cellphone. How do you think would he feel about it? It is quite pricey. I dont want to let him feel that Im bribing him. He wants us to be friends, but now everytime I cook for him and bring him food (which he always requests before), he suddenly gets so cranky about it because he is thinking that Im still trying to win him back. Ofcourse, i want to win him back. but i told him that i can be his friend if that is what he wants. i want to gain his trust again by being his friend, can i still do that? and in the long run, i still want to be his girlfriend. how can i show him my "love" if he wouldn't permit me? i know he loves it when i cook for him, but he doesn't want to. after giving him my gift, i dont know what to do next? what do you think will be the best way to win him back? thanks. this is really helpful for me.

about me getting drunk and flirting, actually it was just a friendly talk but the guy was hitting up on me. but i didnt respond to it. he got jealous.

Signed Up: Mar 02, 2014
Comments: 368 · Posts: 2669 · Topics: 7

Well he told you, he wanted to be friends, & his actions reflects that. Its best to accept his wishes, & not try to change him. If you wanna stay his friend, that's kool. But don't expect nothing less ok. He got cranky when you cooked for him. So that lets you know that he doesn't want anything from you as far as giving stuff. I would take that $ 900 gift back, because you aren't with him anymore. You'll be pushing it too far by giving him that. Just respect his wishes for now & if it's meant for you to be together, it'll happen. You don't wanna get hurt

Signed Up: Jun 17, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 11 · Topics: 3

Posted by 2BlackIndian3
Well he told you, he wanted to be friends, & his actions reflects that. Its best to accept his wishes, & not try to change him. If you wanna stay his friend, that's kool. But don't expect nothing less ok. He got cranky when you cooked for him. So that lets you know that he doesn't want anything from you as far as giving stuff. I would take that $ 900 gift back, because you aren't with him anymore. You'll be pushing it too far by giving him that. Just respect his wishes for now & if it's meant for you to be together, it'll happen. You don't wanna get hurt

really? if you're in his shoes, how would you feel if your ex gave you that?! wouldnt you appreciate it? wouldnt you appreciate the person? we're still friends. i intended that gift for him. woaaaah... i am more confused now. 😢

Cancerbabe

@Cancerbabe

Signed Up: May 24, 2013
Comments: 0 · Posts: 207 · Topics: 10

Posted by Arielle83
You're setting yourself up for disappointment since he already senses your ulterior motives. Since you don't respect how he wants things you will ultimately push him away. You can't be friends because you want 2 be his girl and if he chooses anyone else how will that make u feel?
If i sense someone is trying 2 push a relationship on me wen ive been clear im not interested, i cut them out. Dont push too hard

i agree. turns me off

maomao

@maomao

Signed Up: Aug 27, 2013
Comments: 0 · Posts: 158 · Topics: 9

save your gift. you can give that to him if you guys are back again, but not now.
maybe your intention is pure, but have you thought about how he's supposed to feel?
he clearly told you he only wants to be friends, and certainly he can't accept your expensive gift "as a friend"
at the same time, he doesn't wanna hurt your feeling by rejecting the gift
you're just gonna put him in a bad spot. don't push it

cancerlady33

@cancerlady33

Signed Up: Jan 07, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 146 · Topics: 6

Arizona: let me give you some valuable advice when it comes down to cancers and trust. Yes, it is fact that gift giving to cancers is one of the best things you do to strengthen your bond, we will be absolutely delighted at the fact that you cared enough to honor the event/reason you gave the gift in the first place (bday,just thinking of you, anniversary, etc). We can get a simple card from someone and be just as impressed with that as with an expensive, high-ticket item. Why? Because it's all about the INTENT. Your intentions were good; your intentions were not manipulative in nature. We will understand that that act came directly from your heart (which equates to:this person genuinely loves and cares for me). Cancers are highly psychic and can sniff bs off of a person a mile away, so we will truly know your heart and your intentions before you even present yourself to us. Also, cancers are naturally highly intellectual and are natural pros at subjects like psychology. So trying to manipulate a cancers emotions or thoughts is a DEF NO NO because it insults our emotional and intellectual intelligence (1) and it makes you look like even more of a deceptive person (2). We will DEF shut you out of our hearts and after that, you may never be able to rebuild trust or anything like that because we will mentally consider you off limits (and sometimes this is a decision that will stick for life, no matter how much positive change or growth we see from you). We cannot stand fake people and we will not be fake with you, we will just dismiss your ass. SO! If you truly want to win him back, you're going to have to first chill out and be patient...because it's going to take awhile. You have to start as friends again, like you're doing. Do not try to pry into his business or his feelings for you-don't ever bring that up until he does. Don't be selfish and desire him for your own needs or of wanting a relationship with him. And don't get upset that he's not giving you what you want and run to other men and get yourself into foolishness (because even though he may be cold to you, trust me, if he is still interested in you, he is watching your every move and still testing you). I noticed your tactics to get him are to do things you think he likes or to get him things he wants. BIG NO NO. All manipulation that we can see through. How about you focus on the things that really matters to him, like the reason he dumped you in the first place. Focus on you and fixing any neg

cancerlady33

@cancerlady33

Signed Up: Jan 07, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 146 · Topics: 6

Focus on you and fixing any negative relationship traits he has problems with or that are there. Focus on bonding with him on a soul level (this does not involve giving him things or executing acts you think he likes-it means get to really know him. Let him open his heart and mind to you. Enjoy more experiences together. Make him feel like you are investing in him...because you genuinely care about him and not what he can do for you or how he makes you feel.)

Signed Up: Jun 17, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 11 · Topics: 3

Posted by Jynja
My gosh! The desperation is rather off putting. And the condescending thought that you could somehow bribe him back is quite sad. Let go with a little dignity. You will win him back better that way.

I bought the gift a month ago, before we even broke up. I said awhile ago that I dont want him to think that im bribing him, that's is why im having second thoughts on giving him the gift. i just think that it is such a waste if i dont give it to him.

Signed Up: Mar 02, 2014
Comments: 368 · Posts: 2669 · Topics: 7

Well I agree with Ariel. I give up here lol. I wouldn't give someone a gift after I just broke up with that person lol. That dont sound right to me. I'll take that shyt back & get my money back. He only wants to be friends. Don't push a Crab into anything. Either respect his wishes or move on.

maomao

@maomao

Signed Up: Aug 27, 2013
Comments: 0 · Posts: 158 · Topics: 9

Posted by Arizona
Posted by Jynja
My gosh! The desperation is rather off putting. And the condescending thought that you could somehow bribe him back is quite sad. Let go with a little dignity. You will win him back better that way.

I bought the gift a month ago, before we even broke up. I said awhile ago that I dont want him to think that im bribing him, that's is why im having second thoughts on giving him the gift. i just think that it is such a waste if i dont give it to him.
click to expand

did you not see the words I said to you? it's not about wasting the gift
don't think about things only from your end, consider for others! gez

Signed Up: Jun 17, 2014
Comments: 0 · Posts: 11 · Topics: 3

Posted by cancerlady33
Arizona: let me give you some valuable advice when it comes down to cancers and trust. Yes, it is fact that gift giving to cancers is one of the best things you do to strengthen your bond, we will be absolutely delighted at the fact that you cared enough to honor the event/reason you gave the gift in the first place (bday,just thinking of you, anniversary, etc). We can get a simple card from someone and be just as impressed with that as with an expensive, high-ticket item. Why? Because it's all about the INTENT. Your intentions were good; your intentions were not manipulative in nature. We will understand that that act came directly from your heart (which equates to:this person genuinely loves and cares for me). Cancers are highly psychic and can sniff bs off of a person a mile away, so we will truly know your heart and your intentions before you even present yourself to us. Also, cancers are naturally highly intellectual and are natural pros at subjects like psychology. So trying to manipulate a cancers emotions or thoughts is a DEF NO NO because it insults our emotional and intellectual intelligence (1) and it makes you look like even more of a deceptive person (2). We will DEF shut you out of our hearts and after that, you may never be able to rebuild trust or anything like that because we will mentally consider you off limits (and sometimes this is a decision that will stick for life, no matter how much positive change or growth we see from you). We cannot stand fake people and we will not be fake with you, we will just dismiss your ass. SO! If you truly want to win him back, you're going to have to first chill out and be patient...because it's going to take awhile. You have to start as friends again, like you're doing. Do not try to pry into his business or his feelings for you-don't ever bring that up until he does. Don't be selfish and desire him for your own needs or of wanting a relationship with him. And don't get upset that he's not giving you what you want and run to other men and get yourself into foolishness (because even though he may be cold to you, trust me, if he is still interested in you, he is watching your every move and still testing you). I noticed your tactics to get him are to do things you think he likes or to get him things he wants. BIG NO NO. All manipulation that we can see through. How about you focus on the things that rea