(IT'S TRUE!!) CANCER ALWAYS COME BACK!! OMG!!

OOOOOOOMMMMMMMGGGGGGGG!!! OMG OMG!!
Today I got the BIGGEST SURPRISE in my life I never thought before.
Remember my ex...Mr.Cancer 2011 who broke up with me back in March 2011??
I was crying and hysteric about the sudden break up on this thread here
http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/cancer/HELP!-Cancer-guy-now-gone-need-a-break!!-sobs-2501758.asp
Well..after 6 months of breaking up with me..and recently we forgive each other....
Today..he was buzzing me online and asking to talk. He said it feels WEIRD to know that we are not BF-GF anymore.
He's missing US. I admit we had great memories. He is now living in a faraway city..he used to live 2 hours apart from me..now it's like 4-5 hours apart by plane...!
He said "If I send you tickets and we rekindle things again as BF-GF..would you visit me in XXX city and spend holidays here with me??"
He also keep calling me "MY GIRL" OMG...:o this is BEYOND my expectation...this is crazy! Time DOES change things!!

Anyways...my broken heart is already healing 100% ...and I am analyzing all this.
Now I remember the old posts here saying that "Cancers always COME BACK"
Yes indeed they do!! I am so excited now..!!! But I am being slow here..I have been badly hurt before...
I want to enjoy this friendship with him first..and take things sloooow...but HONESTLY..FOR MY ARIES EGO..the fact that Mr.Crab is asking for a come back..is such a HUUUGGGEEE STROKE on MY Aries EGO (LOL)....!!

From my case..I conclude the fact that he is mentioning a desire to come back to me..happens because :

- we are already in good terms with each other, no more anger and we can talk comfortably like friends
- we had great memories, happy memories that always make us happy thinking about them
- time heals

So yeah..Cancers do come back!!

LOL I guess I am back on the Cancer board agaiiiiiiiin! 😄
Wow..I was on DXP Cancer Forum because of him..and our break up..6 months ago and ...it's crazy how things are changing!

I'm happy for you but I was under the impression that you had closure, no desire to be with him(boyfriend) romantically because you had "changed"

Caution:

I don't want to burst your bubble but here is something you should remember.... This has also be posted on the Cancer board many, many times.

Cancers are nostalgic. He specifically said he is missing the "us" part... but not necessarily "you". kwim? A Cancer can pop back into your like to see if you have moved on, if you still have feelings for them because they don't like to be forgotten.

The fact he lives even farther from you now, he's in a new city and probably feeling lonely and you are now on good terms, is a perfect opportunity to return and re-live the good times. The loving feelings. This is not however reality... He may throw out hypothetical situations to see if you'll 'bite' and you can be a nice comfortable back-up plan to boost his ego. In reality, he'll gain more confidence to go out and meet people in his new city... knowing he has a plan B.

sad... but very possible

PiscesFebFish -- yes..I admit I am changed. The break up did hurt me so bad..that I am taking things very slow before deciding to get into a serious relationship again.
I do love him and care for him, always. He's the FIRST BF that I am able to stay friends with. With my other EX-es I always hold a grudge & burn bridges. With him..I have a mixed feeling of anger and love.

Our break up did hurt me so bad, but I always admit that he is a good person. Very loving, caring & kind.
Honestly, this is beyond my expectation. I decide now..to take things SLOOOW...begin with friendship..and see how it goes from there.

Posted by shellshocker
Caution:

I don't want to burst your bubble but here is something you should remember.... This has also be posted on the Cancer board many, many times.

Cancers are nostalgic. He specifically said he is missing the "us" part... but not necessarily "you". kwim? A Cancer can pop back into your like to see if you have moved on, if you still have feelings for them because they don't like to be forgotten.

The fact he lives even farther from you now, he's in a new city and probably feeling lonely and you are now on good terms, is a perfect opportunity to return and re-live the good times. The loving feelings. This is not however reality... He may throw out hypothetical situations to see if you'll 'bite' and you can be a nice comfortable back-up plan to boost his ego. In reality, he'll gain more confidence to go out and meet people in his new city... knowing he has a plan B.

sad... but very possible

I agree with shellshocker, do not throw caution to the wind here.

UPDATE

Thanks everyone who dropped by & posted here.. I will answer-comment your posts later on..But, a quick update first.

Mr.Cancer is going abroad this week for a few years regarding work contract. He is inviting me for a farewell dinner this week. He promised to be back. We are friends now..but I sense romantic longings from his part.
He's so sweet with me now.
This is a HUGE stroke on my EGO. And I am threading it slowly..very slowly...
I am just enjoying the positivity & sweetness..with my walls up 🙂

Cancers..always hold a soft spot in my heart...

Posted by shellshocker
Caution:

I don't want to burst your bubble but here is something you should remember.... This has also be posted on the Cancer board many, many times.

Cancers are nostalgic. He specifically said he is missing the "us" part... but not necessarily "you". kwim? A Cancer can pop back into your like to see if you have moved on, if you still have feelings for them because they don't like to be forgotten.

The fact he lives even farther from you now, he's in a new city and probably feeling lonely and you are now on good terms, is a perfect opportunity to return and re-live the good times. The loving feelings. This is not however reality... He may throw out hypothetical situations to see if you'll 'bite' and you can be a nice comfortable back-up plan to boost his ego. In reality, he'll gain more confidence to go out and meet people in his new city... knowing he has a plan B.

sad... but very possible

Wow, I soo agree. Trust me I used to do the same to all exes I had
I always was sweet and say stuff I wanted for our futures(i never meant it).
I just liked the comfort knowing that they still had something for me.

I knw other cancer guys that are the same way, so WATCH OUT.
If anything tell him you have moved on and met someone else.
If he backs off quick its cuz thats what he wanted if he doesnt its cuz
He wants to see if ull give into his lie.

TRUST ME, really hope u just tell him to back off, cuz hell just break ur heart again :/

My cancer boy friend broke with me yesterday,he has never done with any of his exes. i am so hurt because i felt like i made him to. He never let me explain anything and assumes a lot. we had a good time together,he loved me a lot. i just wonder is it possible to just end your love. yes he is going through a lot of problems. i was supposed to meet is parents but things turned out ugly and he thinks i dont support him.we had an argument one night and he says i made him so angry and hurt that he cant think of being with me anymore.i loved him and i still do,it is killing me to even think we are not together. i apologised many times but he says i am scratching his wounds more. he knows it i love him very much. he is very adamant when he takes a decision. i was just wondering if he would return.

sorry forgot to mention. It was before i even meet his parents we had a fight.

I don't think they come back. i hope they don't. I'm just really enjoying myself now and I don't want to be broken again.
Now I can easily do not pay attention to his visits on my professional site (you can check, who viewed). i don't care and I don't want to care.

I'm a broken aries. after the break-up I needed 5 f.cking months to move on. I never experienced this before. Now I'm seeing a cancer again. I don't know if this will work out or not. At least he makes me smile again.

Sneaky... yes you are right he is dramatic at times and i really wish him to be dramatic this time too.. but i am scared when he takes decisions very strongly. thanx anyways i will remember if he do that again yes i will move on..

My advice to you please don`t go back to someone who left you, disappeared and suddenly appeared.

This type of guys, when they leave someone in need of being someone, usually the one they know, they are available for them to heal their wound.
Please don`t go back, same thing will happen than you will hurt yourself for the second time.

I hope you keep that in mind..

Peri...thanx for the advice he said so many mean things to me yesterday,can't imagine if he is the same person i knew. well..trying to move on. hope i succeed in doing that.

I'm pretty convinced, that it's a crab shit to predict the behavior based on the past one (personally I do this in my work -in HR point of view) but in my personal life I never worry about things like if somebody did s thing to me...I am not expecting the others to act the same since all we're changing....e.g 3 months ago I was really into the idea my ex has to come (hoped to be) back. Actually I don't want it anymore. It 's not only because he hurt me a lot, then because I've changed. I enjoy myself without him too....if I'm not enjoying it much better by now 🙂.
I still think he is a great guy with a very nice personality, but he has no more role except "being buddies" (talking once quarterly).

Move on girl....!

hi agis...the same thing is happening to me,want him to be back but now i think its better off this way. he left me saying i leave in fairy tale and behave kiddish to be a part of his family which i wont be able to handle. little did he know,everybody hold on to some fairy tale being in reality..i very much know how things work around. then i realised he doesn't accept me for who i am.

I had close relationships with 2 cancer guys.
The first one have been around for about 8 years, till now.
And he always gone and back.
He always back to me even when he has a gf and hit me up and all then leave again. Those crap always happening for EIGHT YEARS.
The second one seems more serious.
But when he was angry he would retreat and gave me a cold shoulder, then he would back again after a week or so or maybe months like nothing has happened before.
So i can say YES they're always back, and tries to remind you of any great feelings or sweet moments that happened on the past.
He needs attention, and has a fear of rejection. To me, its just showing me a low of self esteem they have.
They don't like to be lonely, yet they sometimes get into their cave and be alone.
I honestly feel care about them.
But the fact that they couldn't control their emotion in a healthy way and tend to be manipulative instead, just give me a big no no sign to not allow myself to follow their emotional game anymore, especially if they come back out of the blue after such a break up or silent treatment. So i would just treat em as a friend, if theres a chance to get closer then it might be a "friendzone" relationship.
Thats not a healthy relationship and communication.
Keep it lighthearthed, take it slower and easier.
Good luck.

hi aquaglass...there had been many fights between me and my ex bf but this time it went too far. i know we both had our own faults. i was ready to work out but he wasn't... and once he told me if he ever once walk away in a relationship,he will be gone forever,he doesn't look back.that is why i got scared and hurt when he walked away..and you are right there when u said they can be manipulative. i want to move on real bad..but there is also a part of me who wants him to come back..

He would be all nice and sweet and what not, and it makes people feel that he is awesome and adorable.
I understand if you feel hard to get over it, i've been there, done that.
When we broke up with someone then there might be a time when we miss him so d*mn.
But theres a chance that we actually just miss the hope that we built together before and the good moments that we had before, without count in the fact that the things didn't works out and without reassure ourself that he might be a good one for us.
Yes we have our own faults, but thats not an excuse to compromising over somethin that we strongly known not a good thing to live in, we made mistakes, so apologize for it, learn somethin from it to avoid the same mistakes again, and forgive ourself too (which is we often forget to do, and allow ourself to keep feel sorry of ourself instead).
I'm sure that deep down inside ourself, we absolutely know well what we deserve to get.
If you found it doesn't good for you and just makes you hurt, then whats the point to stay?
I would say just focus to yourself, embrace yourself, healing yourself.
We don't need anybody to told us all the nice thing, but the fact its just a gibberish.
If he said that he will gone forever, just let him to go ahead.
Sounds to me that he tried to be control your action with telling you that.
However i couldn't say thats the healthy way to mantain any relationship.
Not healthy for him and not healthy for you.
Time will shows you the truth.
Hope everything gets better for you.

I'm proud of you Aquaglass & Liamee. Moving on takes a lot of strength.

Reading all this is really disappointing. It hurts to know other women actually go through this:
To have some one
He gets upset & leaves
She waits.
He returns.
She says something hurtful to him
He disappears
He returns
He makes her smile again.
He walks away
She waits
He returns.
He's nice & sweet.
She thinks he's changed.
He gets upset.
He leaves for a month.
He comes back again
She lets him back in....

Where's the relationship? She spends most of her time WAITING ! No woman was BORN to go through this. There are so many GOOD men out there 🙂

hi aquaglass and virgo it actually is nice to see people listening to you. it feels good to hear from you when you are at the point so confused and can't see things straight. you have pointed out the right things. i appreciate you guys thanx 🙂

My Cancer Girl left me a few weeks ago she called me up one night, out of the blue on the first day of Spring break the night we where going to see each other and spend time together. I pick up the phone and she says this over the phone "it's just not working out", which really means(I'm bored of you). After dumping me though she says she still wants to be friend's, which is something she threw in there to soften the punch in the face she already gave me. We only dated for 5 months 😢 and I did nothing wrong! I respected her and her family we never fought once everything seemed like a dream come true! We started out as friends but I was really madly in love with her. And she really liked me too, so She asked me out because I never had the guts to do it. But I said NO because I told her if we go out we are going to break up, and not be friends anymore. She said no we wont we will never break up and I bought that BS and fell for it. And it almost sounded like she was going to cry if I kept saying NO! Cancers are very manipulative! It was very hurtful that she did this to me. And I know shes never going to call me back again, we haven't spoken a word ever since that night she broke up with me. If she dose call me back which I highly doubt will happen I'm not going to pick up. I don't feel like getting hurt again I've moved, on and deleted her number from my phone. And this is my first Girlfriend by the way lol, But if she broke up with me that means she's already moved on and doesn't care about me any more, so it's what ever. I only wish the best for her and hope she finds a guy better then me and that makes her happy. 🙂 But That's life I just learned From this experience that cancer's are very hard to understand. I learned about their feeling's a little more from some really great people on this website 🙂 but yea if a Cancer breaks up with you, it's really unlikely that they are going to come back. But hey everyone is different so you might get lucky and they might come back to you. But if they do come back keep your distance, some Cancer's like to test people remember, you and your feelings come first. Trust your gut and instinct if you think they are going to hurt you again, get out of there because some Cancer's can be very unpredictable.

@ Air Soft, don't be her "friend" if she breaks up with you.

Just go cold turkey on her, and find yourself a new woman.

When a woman initiates the break-up, then don't bother talking to her ever again.

It's simply a waste of your time to pursue a woman who hurts you.

Good luck, and keep in touch.

Posted by shellshocker
Caution:

I don't want to burst your bubble but here is something you should remember.... This has also be posted on the Cancer board many, many times.

Cancers are nostalgic. He specifically said he is missing the "us" part... but not necessarily "you". kwim? A Cancer can pop back into your like to see if you have moved on, if you still have feelings for them because they don't like to be forgotten.

The fact he lives even farther from you now, he's in a new city and probably feeling lonely and you are now on good terms, is a perfect opportunity to return and re-live the good times. The loving feelings. This is not however reality... He may throw out hypothetical situations to see if you'll 'bite' and you can be a nice comfortable back-up plan to boost his ego. In reality, he'll gain more confidence to go out and meet people in his new city... knowing he has a plan B.

sad... but very possible

Bingo.

Well said.

The OP should keep her hard hat, safety goggles and body armor on until she meets him and learns what he really wants from his BEHAVIOR.

Email is one thing, phone calls are another. But actual, steady and regular physical contact will allow her to truly know what is going on. Analyzing his voice tone, body language and the eyes are very critical to knowing whether or not he truly wants her again.

Posted by piranhaparadiise

Posted by shellshocker
A Cancer can pop back into your like to see if you have moved on, if you still have feelings for them because they don't like to be forgotten.

My Cancer ex popped back in my life just yesterday and I told him I'm taken and happy...now delete my number LOL

click to expand

Hahahaha!!!

Posted by peri2013
My advice to you please don`t go back to someone who left you, disappeared and suddenly appeared.

This type of guys, when they leave someone in need of being someone, usually the one they know, they are available for them to heal their wound.
Please don`t go back, same thing will happen than you will hurt yourself for the second time.

I hope you keep that in mind..

That's good advice.

Round 2 could be even more hurtful with her feelings involved.

Agree.

You are 100% right ScorpioFish she hurt me really bad, and I'm pretty much over her now. I'm starting to do things in life that make me happy, 🙂 and being around others that appreciate me for who I am, and that care about me and don't want to hurt me. After she dumped me I felt so traumatized that I wasn't a good person in my life, because it was me that drove her away for some reason. But I talked to some friends and asked them if I was a good person, they said I'm a great person and that its her loss, they say she didn't even know what she had. And that made me feel a lot better inside and I'm just moving on as happy as can be, Because I know I did nothing wrong. When I think about it I drove her anywhere she wanted to go. I also paid for everything she didn't have to spend a dime, when she was with me because I loved her so much. And I was always there for her when ever she needed me. I always tried to see her even if I had plans I would put them aside for her. And what really makes me upset 😢 is that she never tried to come to see me. Just to stop by and be with me out of those 5 months, I just say these things to myself to say I'm better off without her. If she ever calls me back which I don't think is going to happen, because it's been almost 3 weeks already lol I'm not going to pick up. Just to let her know that I'm done with her and that I've moved on. I only said yes when she said she still wanted to be friends because I didn't want to hurt her feelings but I should have said No. I hate giving promises that I can't keep, that was very unlike me to do something like that. I guess I was still in love with her that's why I said yes that night. But what really makes me mad is that she broke up with me over the phone, she didn't even have the guts to face me to say she wanted to break up. Cancer women really confuse the hell out of me lol. 😛

Posted by airsofting12kid
You are 100% right ScorpioFish she hurt me really bad, and I'm pretty much over her now. I'm starting to do things in life that make me happy, 🙂 and being around others that appreciate me for who I am, and that care about me and don't want to hurt me. After she dumped me I felt so traumatized that I wasn't a good person in my life, because it was me that drove her away for some reason. But I talked to some friends and asked them if I was a good person, they said I'm a great person and that its her loss, they say she didn't even know what she had. And that made me feel a lot better inside and I'm just moving on as happy as can be, Because I know I did nothing wrong. When I think about it I drove her anywhere she wanted to go. I also paid for everything she didn't have to spend a dime, when she was with me because I loved her so much. And I was always there for her when ever she needed me. I always tried to see her even if I had plans I would put them aside for her. And what really makes me upset 😢 is that she never tried to come to see me. Just to stop by and be with me out of those 5 months, I just say these things to myself to say I'm better off without her. If she ever calls me back which I don't think is going to happen, because it's been almost 3 weeks already lol I'm not going to pick up. Just to let her know that I'm done with her and that I've moved on. I only said yes when she said she still wanted to be friends because I didn't want to hurt her feelings but I should have said No. I hate giving promises that I can't keep, that was very unlike me to do something like that. I guess I was still in love with her that's why I said yes that night. But what really makes me mad is that she broke up with me over the phone, she didn't even have the guts to face me to say she wanted to break up. Cancer women really confuse the hell out of me lol. 😛

Don't worry so much about what she is doing with her life. When a woman does something really hurtful to you, the best thing you can do is stay away from her. Your sudden absence from her life will make her realize that she has lost contact with a wonderful person (through her own bad behavior), and she will miss you. She may even try to call you, but you have to decide for yourself if you are going to answer or not when she calls.

Your right ScorpioFish I Just want to say thank you for all your advice and help I really appreciate it. 🙂 But I don't think she is going to call me back ever again, it's almost been 4 weeks this Friday coming up. I think she is over me But its what ever I'm over her, if she ever dose call or text me in the future I'm not going to pick up. I just say to myself why would I talk to a person that hurt me for no reason. I can get over things pretty quickly I learn to just let go, but the only thing that bothers me about this past relationship, and that keeps me up some nights and ponder over is that what did I do wrong? If she told me over the phone what I did to upset her I would have said OK I understand you found a flaw in me, we weren't meant to be together I'm moving on. I would have totally understood and would have fixed that problem in me, so I don't hurt the next person that comes into my life. But I'm just going to have to live with it I don't even care anymore. I just hope the next person that comes into my life isn't a Cancer and hurts me the same way this one did. Its going to be a very long time before I share my heart with another girl, after what this one did to me. 😢

I don't know how cancers act because I only had one in my life, but he is more than confusing. After several months he called me and texted me, and texted again.
Nowadays he is liking a lot of pictures and comments etc. I don't know if is a try to be friends, or does he wants more? I guess he is nt over but I'm not sure since he didn't say anything like that.

Posted by agis
I don't know how cancers act because I only had one in my life, but he is more than confusing. After several months he called me and texted me, and texted again.
Nowadays he is liking a lot of pictures and comments etc. I don't know if is a try to be friends, or does he wants more? I guess he is nt over but I'm not sure since he didn't say anything like that.

They are the most confusing people in my opinion Agis. My girlfriend just kept telling me how much she loved me when we were going out, mean while she dumps me for no reason at all. They are so strange they say Cancers like to play games with other peoples feelings. I really don't know if that is true but If my girlfriend dumped me to see how I would react, and to see if I would chase after her then shes only digging a hole for herself. If she calls me back I'm just going to say its over even though she said the night she dumped me that she still wants to be friends. I'm not the type of person that plays games like that when it comes to other peoples feelings. I'm not a child I'm an adult and she's acting like a little kid. I have no time for that in my life I'm moving on. I'm taking Scorpiofishs advice never go back to a person that hurt you, its just going to be a waste of your time, and your only going to get hurt again. But my advice to you agis is to keep your distance if he still has feelings for you, he would just tell you out of the blue. That's what my Cancer girl did to me, but I could be wrong about that when it comes to guy Cancers. It could be different I'm really not sure how men Cancers act. If he calls you or texts you to hang out or something like that, then that means he still has feelings for you. If you ignore a Cancer they will get really upset and try to reach you as much as possible. When a Cancer is angry they will ignore you to see what you will do next. But you know he's not mad at you so he has something planed out, so just watch what he dose next. Keep in touch 🙂

Cancers are nostalgic. That's true but he's also going to be geographically unavailable for years, which means you're getting your hopes up for nothing. Well, not nothing. You love this man and now have confirmation that he genuinely cares for you. That's something but it's not enough to keep you warm at night. Try, try, try not to go all in on this one. I've known women who put their lives on hold for years for men who were not really committed to them and/or geographically unavailable.

Well, well, well.....it's been a busy weekend.
I had a few drinks on Friday night and I wanted to poke him on FB. Sine it didn't work I sent him a message saying "poke function seems to be not available on iphone so here is a POKE".
He replied very very nice and sent me virtual flower to "make your day shiny". We texted the whole weekend. At the end I told him, gonna be around (he mentioned a trip and I assumed he won't be in the city!) and he immediately asked for an appointment. I don't know what to do, when he asked what my plans were I told him on Friday night we'll party because of my birthday, and he said he is going to arrive late, but he'll do his best to get to my party. He also said, if he won't show up we still can meet on Saturday, although he has plans for Saturday night.
He confused me again. I don't know what to do how to act (or react) he seems to be far far away....

Posted by airsofting12kid
Your right ScorpioFish I Just want to say thank you for all your advice and help I really appreciate it. 🙂 But I don't think she is going to call me back ever again, it's almost been 4 weeks this Friday coming up. I think she is over me But its what ever I'm over her, if she ever dose call or text me in the future I'm not going to pick up. I just say to myself why would I talk to a person that hurt me for no reason. I can get over things pretty quickly I learn to just let go, but the only thing that bothers me about this past relationship, and that keeps me up some nights and ponder over is that what did I do wrong? If she told me over the phone what I did to upset her I would have said OK I understand you found a flaw in me, we weren't meant to be together I'm moving on. I would have totally understood and would have fixed that problem in me, so I don't hurt the next person that comes into my life. But I'm just going to have to live with it I don't even care anymore. I just hope the next person that comes into my life isn't a Cancer and hurts me the same way this one did. Its going to be a very long time before I share my heart with another girl, after what this one did to me. 😢

Yeah, don't go crazy and play it cool. Women hate crazy men, and they hate desperate men. Chill out, and someone better will come along. Are you in college? That is a good place to meet girls.

Yea I go to college its a community college its my first year there. There are a lot of pretty girls there but I have know time to talk to them, I'm really not crazy about going out with anyone right now. I'm just sitting back and relaxing I'm really not a big girl chaser lol. I met my first girlfriend where I worked, I started to talk to her because ever time we were near each other, we would just look at each other and not say a word. So I ended up breaking the ice I just wanted to be friendly and not feel awkward every time we worked near each other. I really had no intention of going out with her. I kind of liked her but just wanted to be friendly. But she really ended up liking me a lot and asked me for my number and asking me out. I really didn't see that coming, she acted really desperate on the phone, because when I kept saying NO I just want to be friends she sounded like she was going to cry. So I ended up saying yes because of her forcing me to feel bad. I will never again let someone do that to me, I have no time for that. I really learned from this mistake never go out with a desperate girl they just end up breaking your heart. They probably say to themselves "hey I feel wanted so I'm going to break this person's heart, not give a Sh $ % and find some one else". I really feel like I've grown stronger from this experience of what a break up feels like, especially one when the person breaks up with you for no reason at all. My ex is in her last year of high school she probably found a really good looking guy in her school to go to her prom with, and broke up with me and didn't want to tell me anything because she didn't want to hurt my feelings. That's what I feel happened but I'll never know so it's whatever, I have no Facebook, twitter , Instagram and other social media things, I feel like they are a big wast of time 😛 I'm happy now 🙂 and moving on.