Need help with a Cancer
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by apples252 on Thursday, January 10, 2008 and has 8 replies.
I recently began having a friendship with a cancer male.In the beginning he called me everyday, he even wrote me a song.He introduced me to everyone all his friends and some of his family.Everything was great at first until I started being friends with an ex.I am not interested in my ex any longer but did not think it would be a problem with my cancer friend.He found out and was very upset.One day he asked me whats wrong and I told him.He did not care about my problem as soon as he heard the words, "me and an ex" he ignored everything else.I honestly did not think it was problem because me and the cancer were just friends but I knew my cancer friend was interested in me as more than a friend.I tried to tell him that I did not care for my ex romatically anymore but he seem to not care so I got upset and yelled at him.He ignored me for 2 weeks and then finally called but he still upset.I completely cut off all communication with my ex because my cancer friend means more to me than an ex-boyfriend.I really like him and its hard to talk to him because he analyzes everything and whenever I give him a compliment its like he does not have a lot self-esteem so he does not believe it.He acts like he's so upset with me but I can tell he's really hurt inside.When I first met him he told me he has a hard time trusting females.Now I messed up.I want to give him space but I don't want him to think I am leaving him and went back to my ex.Any advice?
be honest with him and tell him that you are not talking to your ex anymore cause yalls friendship means more. if he won't answer the phone then either email or text explaining to him you would have told him in person but he won't answer. your right he is hurt so after you tell him give him time to think of what you told him and i am sure he will come out of his shell. we cancers are screwed up in that we are very insecure yet we let pride sometimes stand in our way..
Yelling at him wasn't a good idea. Whatever cansir tells you to do - just listen.
oh - I should mention I say just listen because the best advice you will get will be from him.
Let him sulk...he'll be back. They are sooooooooo sensitive but don't let him manipulate you into giving up your friends even if they're an ex.
I haven't called him in a week because the last time I spoke to him, he was still upset.So I'll call him and see if he's still in his shell.I was wondering if I should bring it up or act normal?
don't bring it up - let HIM bring it up if he wants to. That's the best approach, since he may not want to talk about it at all and you bringing it up might make him feel put on the spot and uncomfortable.
thanks for the advice.I appreciate it.I called him and he called me back.I can still tell he's mad but he did not say anything hurtful.He didn't ask me anything,I did all the talking.Its a small improvement from the last time because he was very cold and distant.
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