incandescentcancer
@incandescentcancer
13 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 3 · Posts: 3294 · Topics: 45
new date etiquette (Page 2)
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Posted by aurora
🙂
LM unplanned pregnancies is something that is easily solved. Get birth control pills, drink them when you are supposed to, use condoms and keep track of your ovulation. There is no way to get pregnant and to get std either!
If you ask a man to go your house of course he will hope for some sex (well I learned this from my male friends lol). That's not a bad thing at all! But, if you offer him a good conversation, a pleasant time, he may forgot about his hopes and be like, well I'm glad I get to know you better (and then he'll want you even more lol).
🙂
LOL Aurora I know about protection from planned pregnancies.
I was using it as an analogy. Apparently a bad choice. 😄
I don't have a problem with inviting a man for dinner in my home. I have no problem with saying no and I know how to entertain and keep my clothes on. It's the timing and clearly her wariness that concerned me. Perhaps I'm just highly intuitive and knew this outcome before others whom have posted. 🙂
Good day all.
Posted by LunarMaiden
It's the timing and clearly her wariness that concerned me. Perhaps I'm just highly intuitive and knew this outcome before others whom have posted. 🙂
I still don't understand what's the problem with this outcome...she wasn't all that invested and hopefully she had a decent night.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
Come on now if you felt it was enough of your business to respond to her question why not follow through and give insight into how men think. We aren't talking about men cheating. Stay on topic please.
And I did...none of which involved her sleeping with him which she did of her own volition. I pointed out men cheating to show you how hollow your argument was about sensual environments absolving people of the need for control (atleast the ones who want to stay in control). I personally don't recommend all this unnecessary self-control for available adults.click to expand
I see I need to make that thread I have been wanting to make. The one where women and men totally misunderstand each others intentions. Self control is important and not unnecessary. Having standards and a line to cross is not childish. Making a decision is very adult. Can you explain your last comment in more detail please? Perhaps it's cultural or just a male vs female issue.
I remember you are from Europe. (Switzerland is beautiful BTW.) I had frustrations with my ex who was European and it was along those lines.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
It's the timing and clearly her wariness that concerned me. Perhaps I'm just highly intuitive and knew this outcome before others whom have posted. 🙂
I still don't understand what's the problem with this outcome...she wasn't all that invested and hopefully she had a decent night.click to expand
Apparently more than decent she wants more.
My problem wasn't with the outcome as it is what I expected.
Posted by LunarMaidenPosted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
It's the timing and clearly her wariness that concerned me. Perhaps I'm just highly intuitive and knew this outcome before others whom have posted. 🙂
I still don't understand what's the problem with this outcome...she wasn't all that invested and hopefully she had a decent night.
Apparently more than decent she wants more.
My problem wasn't with the outcome as it is what I expected.click to expand
I am sorry but you're making a lot of presumptions here about what this woman and her dude wanted.
Posted by LunarMaiden
I see I need to make that thread I have been wanting to make. The one where women and men totally misunderstand each others intentions. Self control is important and not unnecessary. Having standards and a line to cross is not childish. Making a decision is very adult. Can you explain your last comment in more detail please? Perhaps it's cultural or just a male vs female issue.
I remember you are from Europe. (Switzerland is beautiful BTW.) I had frustrations with my ex who was European and it was along those lines.
There is no cultural or male/female issue...it's simply my perspective that grown up adults should live more freely and stop whining so much about wanting this person or that. The world is full of wonderful and tremendously interesting people...why waste all 40-50 years on just one? This doesn't mean hurting or cheating anyone by pretending to be in a relationship. Quite simply be friends, get to know the wonderful things about them, have sex if you want to and live comfortably.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaidenPosted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
It's the timing and clearly her wariness that concerned me. Perhaps I'm just highly intuitive and knew this outcome before others whom have posted. 🙂
I still don't understand what's the problem with this outcome...she wasn't all that invested and hopefully she had a decent night.
Apparently more than decent she wants more.
My problem wasn't with the outcome as it is what I expected.
I am sorry but you're making a lot of presumptions here about what this woman and her dude wanted.click to expand
My responses are based on what she posted.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
I see I need to make that thread I have been wanting to make. The one where women and men totally misunderstand each others intentions. Self control is important and not unnecessary. Having standards and a line to cross is not childish. Making a decision is very adult. Can you explain your last comment in more detail please? Perhaps it's cultural or just a male vs female issue.
I remember you are from Europe. (Switzerland is beautiful BTW.) I had frustrations with my ex who was European and it was along those lines.
There is no cultural or male/female issue...it's simply my perspective that grown up adults should live more freely and stop whining so much about wanting this person or that. The world is full of wonderful and tremendously interesting people...why waste all 40-50 years on just one? This doesn't mean hurting or cheating anyone by pretending to be in a relationship. Quite simply be friends, get to know the wonderful things about them, have sex if you want to and live comfortably.click to expand
LOL Okay.......
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
Ok what do you recommend for the appropriate date to try a guy?
Why waist time only to find out two months later he is not good in bed?
We all guilty of falling with our hearts.... sticking with the guy out of pity.
Please.
You answered your own question.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
LOL Okay.......
You're very conservative, aren't you? 🙂click to expand
Yes I am 🙂
Posted by incandescentcancer
There is no cultural or male/female issue...it's simply my perspective that grown up adults should live more freely and stop whining so much about wanting this person or that. The world is full of wonderful and tremendously interesting people...why waste all 40-50 years on just one? This doesn't mean hurting or cheating anyone by pretending to be in a relationship. Quite simply be friends, get to know the wonderful things about them, have sex if you want to and live comfortably.
You need to realize that she's female and you're male. Women do not approach sex like men do. Men can go around fucking anything and everything and walk away without any emotional ties.
Women on the other hand, cannot do so as easily. Not all, but most. More emotion is tied to sex so they're always confusing it with the guy truly being interested, loving them, etc. So when the guy up and leaves without as much as a glance back, they're baffled.
This is what happend to this chick. The fact that you encouraged it, without warning her that this guy may want to go down that road, was rather irresponsible on your part. Who cares if YOU'VE been on second dates at the house. You're you and you control your dick. You can't really say the same for the average male. She can't either since she really didn't know the guy all THAT well. So to assume it was okay for her to bring him over, and not worry about something like "he thinks I'll want sex and am easy (whatever it was)" is failure on your part as a male giving advice on this situation. You were nothing but the mere devil's advocate suggesting she do something that really wouldn't benefit her at all.
She went into it and didn't say no, fine. That's her problem. But the problem is that initially you gave her naive self the okay to bring him over. That is not cool and you shouldn't be giving male advice to a female. You don't know what it's like to be one and are not aware of what women have to think about to keep themselves safe physically and emotionally.
I sure as fuck wouldn't want you as a male friend if that's how you approach dating advice for women. MY male friends tell me not to bother when they know it's likely that the guy is up to no good and wants to hit it and quit it.
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
Ok what do you recommend for the appropriate date to try a guy?
Why waist time only to find out two months later he is not good in bed?
We all guilty of falling with our hearts.... sticking with the guy out of pity.
Please.
It should be based on one's comfort level. If you wanna appear skanky and sleep with the guy on the second date, go for it. But you won't be winning any brownie points for doing so. Unfortunately, our society still perpetuates that a woman wanting to practice approaching sex like a man is bad and men carry this same attitude sometimes. They may say they don't care, but watch them start to treat you differently the second they get to play with your lady bits without having to work for it.
If a chick wants to wait 2 months and find out he sucks, fine.
If a chick doesn't want to wait and do it right away, fine. But to do so and expect the guy to be the same afterward and not go cold is plain ignorant and living in lala land.
The fact that you wanna jump in asap isn't shocking. Almost all Leo chicks that I know jump in way too fast and end up with tons o drama because they refuse to keep their panties on for a few more dates.
Rocky your posts are excellent.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
You need to realize that she's female and you're male. Women do not approach sex like men do. Men can go around fucking anything and everything and walk away without any emotional ties.
Women on the other hand, cannot do so as easily. Not all, but most. More emotion is tied to sex so they're always confusing it with the guy truly being interested, loving them, etc. So when the guy up and leaves without as much as a glance back, they're baffled.
The question she posed was sure as hell not about sex, she just asked about bringing a guy home for a date since it was too cold outside. I am tired of reiterating this very simple fact. So I am not entirely sure why I am the one being attacked here when her question was partial. I agree that "some" women and men look at sex differently, the blanket statement that all men and women look at it differently is pretty arguable. There are plenty of men who expect the same thing after a sexual encounter as women do. I hope you would give up the victim mentality that it's only men who leave women.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
This is what happend to this chick. The fact that you encouraged it, without warning her that this guy may want to go down that road, was rather irresponsible on your part. Who cares if YOU'VE been on second dates at the house. You're you and you control your dick. You can't really say the same for the average male. She can't either since she really didn't know the guy all THAT well. So to assume it was okay for her to bring him over, and not worry about something like "he thinks I'll want sex and am easy (whatever it was)" is failure on your part as a male giving advice on this situation. You were nothing but the mere devil's advocate suggesting she do something that really wouldn't benefit her at all.
Let me say this again, I did not encourage her to have sex with him. Just as no one cares what I do on second dates, I don't care if she decides to have sex with him after clearly stating that she just wanted him over for dinner. She is a grown up 30 year old woman and I would imagine she has sufficient clarity on what is good for her. As you say if she really didn't know him all that well, it's entirely her fault to have sex with him and grow expectations of the nature that she did. If you just want to blame someone for her decisions and that someone has to be me then so be it, I am tired of arguing this with people who seem to be happy in this world of victimhood they like to fantasize about.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
She went into it and didn't say no, fine. That's her problem. But the problem is that initially you gave her naive self the okay to bring him over. That is not cool and you shouldn't be giving male advice to a female. You don't know what it's like to be one and are not aware of what women have to think about to keep themselves safe physically and emotionally.
I sure as fuck wouldn't want you as a male friend if that's how you approach dating advice for women. MY male friends tell me not to bother when they know it's likely that the guy is up to no good and wants to hit it and quit it.
This is a message board, people should state clearly what they intend to do if they want advice. If you present half of what's on your mind and expect me to read your mind and come up with complete answers then you should find a psychic. Your overall attitude that I am somehow to blame is disturbing and perhaps you should read the entire thread and draw proper conclusions. I don't know what kind of male friends you have but my female friends (and I have plenty of them) sure as hell don't tell me half truths and expect proper advice. It's possible that maybe you have a different notion of what a male friend is supposed to be like in the US.
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
@rocky ... thank you.
I understand what you saying but i rather lose a "child man" who hasn't had his balls grown to the right size rather than spend two years loving a guy who does nothing for me as a man.
I did not play games with my cancer guy, i told him upfront i want to know his abilities as a man before proceedings further. He came on second day after sleeping with him. He wasn't the best i had but with some directions our bodies work well together...
Accept two month later he found out how hard a Leo woman can roar when someone play the games like Maiden here ...
Don't take me wrong I'm not this cold and i do love the guy ....
here is another question for you: when do you stop manipulating someone who already loves you?
And this is why I like Leo women, me favourite girlfriends have been Leos. I am always happiest with them simply because they are straight and don't play useless games. I can deal with honesty however harsh it might be rather than play silly games. I think the way you dealt with your Cancer man is the blueprint on how to go about it, tell him to take it or leave it but you will not step into his world of games. My compliments!
As an aside one of my Leo female friends seems to be hurt because she perceives that I am not giving her enough attention these days. Truth be told I am just very preoccupied with many issues and she knows it and she is still upset and withdrawn (sort of wounded). Any advice how to make her feel happier?
Well he text me yesterday. He said he was having a night out, and he hasnt been in touch because he assumed that when i said i ws getting bad vibes from him, it meant that i didnt want to see him again. Thanks for all the posts, wow!
I just told him that i hadnt wanted it to be that we slept together and BAM it was history, that my intention had been to go out again, but that i'd felt like he wasnt being clear if he wanted the same or was leaving it at the sex. He hasnt answered me since, so i dont know..hes probably thinking about how to keep me around until he decides what to do. I just wanted it off my chest..AMEN 🙂
I just told him that i hadnt wanted it to be that we slept together and BAM it was history, that my intention had been to go out again, but that i'd felt like he wasnt being clear if he wanted the same or was leaving it at the sex. He hasnt answered me since, so i dont know..hes probably thinking about how to keep me around until he decides what to do. I just wanted it off my chest..AMEN 🙂
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
@incandescent...
Nope, few weeks ago he send one of his buddies to "check" on me. I so wanted to kick his ass but decided to be a lady. (What ever that means nowadays)
I don't do fb and most of my friends have given up too. However we do use msngr and from time to time we send each other captured photos of things we see on our trips and "thought to share with you" ... not with everyone like we did on fb but more personal. The latest picture was of a guy fishing in northern Michigan all bundled up :-). A picture came with msg "I'm just as cold, miss the beach"
I don't get it. What part of my post were you responding to. Apologies for the confusion 🙂
Posted by incandescentcancer
The question she posed was sure as hell not about sex, she just asked about bringing a guy home for a date since it was too cold outside. I am tired of reiterating this very simple fact.
Are you seriously that naive or are you just whipping out the typical Cancer manipulation tactics here?
Posted by incandescentcancer
Let me say this again, I did not encourage her to have sex with him. Just as no one cares what I do on second dates, I don't care if she decides to have sex with him after clearly stating that she just wanted him over for dinner...
Now you're just making shit up. I didn't say that you encouraged her to have sex, I said you encouraged her to have him come over.
Posted by incandescentcancer
This is a message board, people should state clearly what they intend to do if they want advice. If you present half of what's on your mind and expect me to read your mind and come up with complete answers then you should find a psychic. Your overall attitude that I am somehow to blame is disturbing and perhaps you should read the entire thread and draw proper conclusions. I don't know what kind of male friends you have but my female friends (and I have plenty of them) sure as hell don't tell me half truths and expect proper advice. It's possible that maybe you have a different notion of what a male friend is supposed to be like in the US.click to expand
Oh come on, who's playing the victim card now? Everything you write is you trying to absolve you of the initial illogical "advice" you gave her.
However, I do agree that her coming in claiming intention x and then turning around and actually attempting intention y is ridiculous.
But, you encouraging that she bring him over, WHEN IT IS COMMON KNOWLEDGE THAT BRINGING A GUY OVER = SEX, is bullshit. You can sit here and claim that you didn't encourage anything, but as a male you know damned well that bringing a guy over leaves the impression that he may get some ass. To sit here and backpedal and make shit up about she being "victimized" is bullshit. You are a great example of male mentality when it comes to women and how they should be treated.
Nobody has victimized this chick and it's been pointed out what bs she did, however, it is not appreciated that your advice is NOT beneficial, which was the whole point of my reply. Nobody is saying that your advice is WHY she did what she did, but the fact that you gave it is what makes you look naive/devil's advocate here. It's like knowing the stove is hot, yet when someone asks you if it's hot before they touch it, and you say "no it's fine, go for it," that is not sound advice, is it?
Again, you cannot give women MALE advice when it comes to dating. I don't think you really get it or what it's like to be female in the dating pool.
I gotta ask, are you related to Mitt Romney by chance?
Again, you cannot give women MALE advice when it comes to dating. I don't think you really get it or what it's like to be female in the dating pool.
I gotta ask, are you related to Mitt Romney by chance?
Posted by Sola
Well he text me yesterday. He said he was having a night out, and he hasnt been in touch because he assumed that when i said i ws getting bad vibes from him, it meant that i didnt want to see him again. Thanks for all the posts, wow!
I just told him that i hadnt wanted it to be that we slept together and BAM it was history, that my intention had been to go out again, but that i'd felt like he wasnt being clear if he wanted the same or was leaving it at the sex. He hasnt answered me since, so i dont know..hes probably thinking about how to keep me around until he decides what to do. I just wanted it off my chest..AMEN 🙂
Glad you feel better since you heard from him. I wouldn't hold any major expectations from this guy though.
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
@rocky ... thank you.
I understand what you saying but i rather lose a "child man" who hasn't had his balls grown to the right size rather than spend two years loving a guy who does nothing for me as a man.
I did not play games with my cancer guy, i told him upfront i want to know his abilities as a man before proceedings further. He came on second day after sleeping with him. He wasn't the best i had but with some directions our bodies work well together...
Accept two month later he found out how hard a Leo woman can roar when someone play the games like Maiden here ...
Don't take me wrong I'm not this cold and i do love the guy ....
here is another question for you: when do you stop manipulating someone who already loves you?
On what planet does telling a guy I would like to get to know him better BEFORE sex equate to playing games?
I don't lead with my vagina when I am seeking something worthwhile and sex is not my only interest.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
whipping out the typical Cancer manipulation tactics here?
I think we are done talking here. I have been nothing but straightforward here and you have been slandering me. I don't need this kind of crap.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
But, you encouraging that she bring him over, WHEN IT IS COMMON KNOWLEDGE THAT BRINGING A GUY OVER = SEX, is bullshit. You can sit here and claim that you didn't encourage anything, but as a male you know damned well that bringing a guy over leaves the impression that he may get some ass. To sit here and backpedal and make shit up about she being "victimized" is bullshit. You are a great example of male mentality when it comes to women and how they should be treated.
click to expand
Inviting someone over for dinner might equate sex in your world, it doesn't in mine or most other people I know (male or female). Thank you for making my point about the victim mentality with your amazing rant about "male mentality".
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
@rocky
Bringing a guy over does not equate sex. If any guy here assumes this type... lol ... he'll be leaving hard
Lol ...
I have been repeatedly saying this in this thread to absolutely no avail. The two ladies have their mind set on this fundamental falsehood.
Posted by LeoVirgoGirl
There are many women out there who years into mrg or relationship realize they are living a lie, fall for another guy and ditch the poor conservative guy.... men who create the good girl fantasy end up exactly in the fantasy.
Please do not take me wrong. I'm not saying men should be used but i believe we are all old enough to respect eachother sexually.
Bingo! Guys who think their partner is the Virgin Mary (no disrespect meant) end up in their own little fairy tale world and ultimately alone. I am happy that you have it down so clearly. I expect women to decide what's good or bad for THEM and not for the society or some archaic social values. Women talk about equality but don't think in terms of equality in their own head. If you think a guy is judging you based on his archaic values then dump him and move on, there are 3,5 billion men on the planet and lots of them are pretty intelligent.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Again, you cannot give women MALE advice when it comes to dating. I don't think you really get it or what it's like to be female in the dating pool.
I gotta ask, are you related to Mitt Romney by chance?
Perhaps y'all should form a female sub-forum and ask dating advice only from other women, we all know how well that works.
The last part is just plain disrespectful.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LeoVirgoGirl
@rocky
Bringing a guy over does not equate sex. If any guy here assumes this type... lol ... he'll be leaving hard
Lol ...
I have been repeatedly saying this in this thread to absolutely no avail. The two ladies have their mind set on this fundamental falsehood.click to expand
I feel we are going in circles. It's beginning to look like I am throwing rocks at the handicap bus.
No one has said that absolutely in all cases having a guy over equates to sex every single time in all cases.
We are talking about the initial first dates and avoiding situations that would lead to sex too soon.
Posted by LunarMaiden
I feel we are going in circles. It's beginning to look like I am throwing rocks at the handicap bus.
No one has said that absolutely in all cases having a guy over equates to sex every single time in all cases.
We are talking about the initial first dates and avoiding situations that would lead to sex too soon.
Thanks for calling me an idiot. Avoiding those situations is generally managed by using two devices called common sense and self control. However my simple question is so what if she had sex and doesn't meet the guy again, she had no emotional investment, nobody cares except seemingly you and your buddy rocky.
Posted by LeoVirgoGirlPosted by LunarMaidenPosted by LeoVirgoGirl
@rocky ... thank you.
I understand what you saying but i rather lose a "child man" who hasn't had his balls grown to the right size rather than spend two years loving a guy who does nothing for me as a man.
I did not play games with my cancer guy, i told him upfront i want to know his abilities as a man before proceedings further. He came on second day after sleeping with him. He wasn't the best i had but with some directions our bodies work well together...
Accept two month later he found out how hard a Leo woman can roar when someone play the games like Maiden here ...
Don't take me wrong I'm not this cold and i do love the guy ....
here is another question for you: when do you stop manipulating someone who already loves you?
On what planet does telling a guy I would like to get to know him better BEFORE sex equate to playing games?
I don't lead with my vagina when I am seeking something worthwhile and sex is not my only interest.
I respect your opinion but sex is important in relationship. As women we are guilty pretending because we love with our hearts. We lie to men, fake orgasms , etc.
There are many women out there who years into mrg or relationship realize they are living a lie, fall for another guy and ditch the poor conservative guy.... men who create the good girl fantasy end up exactly in the fantasy.
Please do not take me wrong. I'm not saying men should be used but i believe we are all old enough to respect eachother sexually.
Now i would like to ask you this question:
Would you get into a relationship with a guy who does nothing for you sexually?
Would you marry this guy?click to expand
LVG, let me correct you. Sex is important to YOU in a relationship.
Liking sex is great. No one is negating that.
Women choose men for various different reasons.
There are many women who choose men solely for financial reasons.
Some for companionship other for the physical prowess.
A woman married to a man for money and is not attracted to him better fake those orgasms if she wants to maintain her life style . Or find a way to please herself.
For those women faking it with a man they love there are numerous resources availa
Posted by Sola
Well he text me yesterday. He said he was having a night out, and he hasnt been in touch because he assumed that when i said i ws getting bad vibes from him, it meant that i didnt want to see him again.
You told a cancer male you're getting bad vibes from him and then you have the nerve to tell everyone here that HE is judging you. wow just wow, I think my head might explode reading all the bullshit posted here. I have to give credit to you for winding everyone up here with a series of half truths and late disclosures.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
I feel we are going in circles. It's beginning to look like I am throwing rocks at the handicap bus.
No one has said that absolutely in all cases having a guy over equates to sex every single time in all cases.
We are talking about the initial first dates and avoiding situations that would lead to sex too soon.
Thanks for calling me an idiot. Avoiding those situations is generally managed by using two devices called common sense and self control. However my simple question is so what if she had sex and doesn't meet the guy again, she had no emotional investment, nobody cares except seemingly you and your buddy rocky.click to expand
I don't think you are an idiot. I actually like you and find you intelligent but highly adept at mind psyche. I also think you are seeing things your way and not open to what women feel and think.
Ah see here is where we get to it. When a girl likes a guy we get emotionally invested way before the sex. SO when the guy disappears after sex it hits us hard. Not all of us of course but in many cases.
Yes I do care about people and giving them the right advice. I don't like to see others get hurt nor used. At this point I feel sucked into a round roller coaster that never stops.
Posted by scorchedearth
is this male cancer playing retarded? i feel like lunarmaiden and rocky are being pretty fair in their assessments. there's good advice then there's advice that mr male cancer gave. i understand that men like to look out for each other, but you shouldn't give MALE advice to females. it was entirely too soon for her to invite him over to her house especially if she wasn't actively thinking she wanted to have sex with him.
i'm not sure why he's arguing so hard against them.
I have my opinion and you lot have yours. I don't get personal and disrespectful despite the fact that I find your views archaic and I would hope you can return the courtesy. It's always easy to play monday morning quarterback isn't it after you have all the information on this thread laid out for you.
Posted by scorchedearth
you're awfully defensive in this guys favor. are you projecting yourself into the situation and getting upset because you'd hate it if someone said that about you? that's the only explanation i can come up with for why you're so hilariously defensive about this whole thread.click to expand
I am getting defensive because a bunch of women are accusing me of setting up this lady when I did no such thing. I wonder how you would react if similar accusations were leveled against you, perhaps you would accept them as fair and reasonable.
Posted by Sola
Well he text me yesterday. He said he was having a night out, and he hasnt been in touch because he assumed that when i said i ws getting bad vibes from him, it meant that i didnt want to see him again. Thanks for all the posts, wow!
I just told him that i hadnt wanted it to be that we slept together and BAM it was history, that my intention had been to go out again, but that i'd felt like he wasnt being clear if he wanted the same or was leaving it at the sex. He hasnt answered me since, so i dont know..hes probably thinking about how to keep me around until he decides what to do. I just wanted it off my chest..AMEN 🙂
i'm pretty sure i called this one.
Posted by LunarMaiden
I don't think you are an idiot. I actually like you and find you intelligent but highly adept at mind psyche. I also think you are seeing things your way and not open to what women feel and think.
Ah see here is where we get to it. When a girl likes a guy we get emotionally invested way before the sex. SO when the guy disappears after sex it hits us hard. Not all of us of course but in many cases.
Yes I do care about people and giving them the right advice. I don't like to see others get hurt nor used. At this point I feel sucked into a round roller coaster that never stops.
Look, I don't intend to drag you into a quagmire of circular logic either. I think that I am very receptive to female emotions and their thought process, I just don't take kindly to personal attacks when you should just be talking about my opinion or arguments. You made an awful lot of personal judgement about me when you don't know me at all.
In closing I will say this, as long as women continue to think of sex as some sort of control device for a relationship there will never be male-female parity. The last piece of wood men have over women is their sexual insecurity, take that away and you have a level playing field. That in a nut shell is my point.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
I don't think you are an idiot. I actually like you and find you intelligent but highly adept at mind psyche. I also think you are seeing things your way and not open to what women feel and think.
Ah see here is where we get to it. When a girl likes a guy we get emotionally invested way before the sex. SO when the guy disappears after sex it hits us hard. Not all of us of course but in many cases.
Yes I do care about people and giving them the right advice. I don't like to see others get hurt nor used. At this point I feel sucked into a round roller coaster that never stops.
Look, I don't intend to drag you into a quagmire of circular logic either. I think that I am very receptive to female emotions and their thought process, I just don't take kindly to personal attacks when you should just be talking about my opinion or arguments. You made an awful lot of personal judgement about me when you don't know me at all.
In closing I will say this, as long as women continue to think of sex as some sort of control device for a relationship there will never be male-female parity. The last piece of wood men have over women is their sexual insecurity, take that away and you have a level playing field. That in a nut shell is my point.click to expand
I don't mean to make you feel as if your advice is not appreciated and I apologize for what you may feel is a personal attack. Men often use sex against women. A woman withholding sex is smart not manipulative. What is wrong with wanting to know someone on a more profound level then having sex after she feels more secure with him?
Posted by scorchedearth
you've never been a woman. the rest of us have. our viewpoints are from the perspective of being female. you are a man. it's not a matter of being archaic. societies standards have always fallen in your favor, not ours. we're just acknowledging that the double standard exists which you seem unable to do. it's really easy for you as a man to say that the double standards don't exist just because you personally have never held those opinions. however, you're not every man in the world. and more men than not look down on women who have the morals of a man. just because you like more loose women and think that sex is all casual and fun and games and no one is judged doesn't make that the reality for the majority of women. you've never been on the bitch end of the double standard so you're opinion is really worthless as far as telling women how men react to them. you've never been in that position because you've always been a man.
Well then continue being an enable to those very same double standards. Mould yourself to suit those archaic attitudes....I don't really care.
Posted by LunarMaiden
A woman withholding sex is smart not manipulative. What is wrong with wanting to know someone on a more profound level then having sex after she feels more secure with him?
Timing sex is the mistake, it should be a natural event irrespective of a defined outcome. I don't plan sex with women, why shouldn't it be the same the other way around if we aspire for an equal society?
I didnt time my sex with this guy..its fucked up whether its the first date or the 10th..its just the way we are 😢
IC, are you saying you never planned for a seduction? You are pulling my leg aren't you? LOL
Posted by LunarMaiden
IC, are you saying you never planned for a seduction? You are pulling my leg aren't you? LOL
No, what I am saying is if I am interested in a girl I don't decide I will have sex with her on the 5th date for example. I let things take their natural course. I will however do my best to make the environment comfortable and enjoyable for her to get her into the happy place in her head. 😛
IC is sick!
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
IC, are you saying you never planned for a seduction? You are pulling my leg aren't you? LOL
No, what I am saying is if I am interested in a girl I don't decide I will have sex with her on the 5th date for example. I let things take their natural course. I will however do my best to make the environment comfortable and enjoyable for her to get her into the happy place in her head. 😛click to expand
LMAO Happy place eh? So you don't find delayed gratification to be wise nor a turn on?
Posted by LunarMaidenPosted by incandescentcancerPosted by LunarMaiden
IC, are you saying you never planned for a seduction? You are pulling my leg aren't you? LOL
No, what I am saying is if I am interested in a girl I don't decide I will have sex with her on the 5th date for example. I let things take their natural course. I will however do my best to make the environment comfortable and enjoyable for her to get her into the happy place in her head. 😛
LMAO Happy place eh? So you don't find delayed gratification to be wise nor a turn on?click to expand
I am saying I am ok if it comes on the 2nd date or the 14th, as long as I like a girl we are good, I won't push her for anything.
heheh, you're getting bashed. Its so cute.
Posted by Sola
heheh, you're getting bashed. Its so cute.
I got to thank yo for that you know. Everyone has made me the villain of your story, pretty unbelievable actually 🙂.
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