Nurturing cancers

This topic was created in the Cancer forum by jeane on Wednesday, October 18, 2017 and has 19 replies.
So I'll be the first to admit I know very little about cancers beyond the very basic "they're emotional" stereotype.

But I'm hoping you guys can further my knowledge when it comes to the nurturing side of cancer and cancer related people.

My partner (Taurus Sun) has a cancer mars. Now as a libra, I can find this combination at times frustrating however, I also find it endearing and very admirable.

He is fiercely protective as expected and more recently I witnessed the depths of his nurturing side as well.

Now to my question; do you guys like this aspect of your personalities? Do you wish you didn't have it and feel vulnerable to it being played with? Does it tire you out? Or do you get a feeling of satisfaction/enjoyment/fulfillment/? when you get to show that side?

I think I am quite insensitive and I don't come at things from a feeling perspective but more a colder, clinical and logical one so this is kinda foreign to me.

I like it but I would like to understand more about it.

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Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
so he's nurturing because he has one cancer placement on his chart


what are his other placements?
Do you think it's not down to that? Perhaps. Like I said, I don't know enough so I'm guessing here.

Taurus Sun, sag moon, Taurus venus, cancer mars, Gemini merc.
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Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
Posted by jeane
Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
so he's nurturing because he has one cancer placement on his chart


what are his other placements?
Do you think it's not down to that? Perhaps. Like I said, I don't know enough so I'm guessing here.

Taurus Sun, sag moon, Taurus venus, cancer mars, Gemini merc.
OOOOOOOOOO you might be correct in your assessment

i always think about it as environment.
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He is the eldest child.

However, I have an older brother (gem sun and moon, Taurus venus and Merc, aqua mars) and he is not in the slightest this way inclined. I'm not sure if it could be down to birth order.

I'm certainly open to suggestions and theories though.
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I love your avi picture - Free Melania - lol

I don't have a cancer mars but for what this is worth - my old bff - libra / sag - she was not the nurturing or the want to be nurtured type - she always described herself as very nurturing but I found her to be more the demanding "just do this and feel better" type described - and I was pretty much there with her husband and children so it's not like she just didn't show that to me - and I strongly feel that her upbringing had a lot to do with that.

What throws me is how to distinguish between the Taurus Sun and Cancer Mars when it comes to feels - as I have trouble differentiating sometimes with my Pisces Mars and Taurus. I can't tell from which angle this "behavior" is coming.


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Posted by tctao
I love your avi picture - Free Melania - lol

I don't have a cancer mars but for what this is worth - my old bff - libra / sag - she was not the nurturing or the want to be nurtured type - she always described herself as very nurturing but I found her to be more the demanding "just do this and feel better" type described - and I was pretty much there with her husband and children so it's not like she just didn't show that to me - and I strongly feel that her upbringing had a lot to do with that.

What throws me is how to distinguish between the Taurus Sun and Cancer Mars when it comes to feels - as I have trouble differentiating sometimes with my Pisces Mars and Taurus. I can't tell from which angle this "behavior" is coming.

See, I don't see myself as very nurturing. I am a problem solver. I don't have a great deal of patience for feelings beyond the "tell me how you are feeling and let me fix it" so I genuinely feel this side of him is refreshing and absolutely beneficial.

But yes, the depth of feeling may be Taurus but that casual ease at which he can just sit in the feeling, run toward it and embrace it even, support and emotionally provide when needed makes me think it's his mars. I've seen the Taurus feeling side, it's very different.
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Posted by jeane
Posted by tctao
I love your avi picture - Free Melania - lol

I don't have a cancer mars but for what this is worth - my old bff - libra / sag - she was not the nurturing or the want to be nurtured type - she always described herself as very nurturing but I found her to be more the demanding "just do this and feel better" type described - and I was pretty much there with her husband and children so it's not like she just didn't show that to me - and I strongly feel that her upbringing had a lot to do with that.

What throws me is how to distinguish between the Taurus Sun and Cancer Mars when it comes to feels - as I have trouble differentiating sometimes with my Pisces Mars and Taurus. I can't tell from which angle this "behavior" is coming.

See, I don't see myself as very nurturing. I am a problem solver. I don't have a great deal of patience for feelings beyond the "tell me how you are feeling and let me fix it" so I genuinely feel this side of him is refreshing and absolutely beneficial.

But yes, the depth of feeling may be Taurus but that casual ease at which he can just sit in the feeling, run toward it and embrace it even, support and emotionally provide when needed makes me think it's his mars. I've seen the Taurus feeling side, it's very different.
click to expand
yeah, that sounds familiar - she was a problem solver and so was I but I was much more nurturing then she was - and again, perhaps our definitions are different - I go deeper, much deeper than that - because I do that with myself, I do that with loved ones as well ...

I find it amazing that you can differentiate - I can't seem to do that - maybe I just don't know enough

it sure sounds endearing - he is really opening up so he is definitely all yours !


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Posted by tctao
Posted by jeane
Posted by tctao
I love your avi picture - Free Melania - lol

I don't have a cancer mars but for what this is worth - my old bff - libra / sag - she was not the nurturing or the want to be nurtured type - she always described herself as very nurturing but I found her to be more the demanding "just do this and feel better" type described - and I was pretty much there with her husband and children so it's not like she just didn't show that to me - and I strongly feel that her upbringing had a lot to do with that.

What throws me is how to distinguish between the Taurus Sun and Cancer Mars when it comes to feels - as I have trouble differentiating sometimes with my Pisces Mars and Taurus. I can't tell from which angle this "behavior" is coming.

See, I don't see myself as very nurturing. I am a problem solver. I don't have a great deal of patience for feelings beyond the "tell me how you are feeling and let me fix it" so I genuinely feel this side of him is refreshing and absolutely beneficial.

But yes, the depth of feeling may be Taurus but that casual ease at which he can just sit in the feeling, run toward it and embrace it even, support and emotionally provide when needed makes me think it's his mars. I've seen the Taurus feeling side, it's very different.
yeah, that sounds familiar - she was a problem solver and so was I but I was much more nurturing then she was - and again, perhaps our definitions are different - I go deeper, much deeper than that - because I do that with myself, I do that with loved ones as well ...

I find it amazing that you can differentiate - I can't seem to do that - maybe I just don't know enough

it sure sounds endearing - he is really opening up so he is definitely all yours !


click to expand
After 3 and a half years together I bloody hope so! He just keeps getting better and better.

How are you and the Libra?
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Posted by jeane
Posted by tctao
Posted by jeane
Posted by tctao
I love your avi picture - Free Melania - lol

I don't have a cancer mars but for what this is worth - my old bff - libra / sag - she was not the nurturing or the want to be nurtured type - she always described herself as very nurturing but I found her to be more the demanding "just do this and feel better" type described - and I was pretty much there with her husband and children so it's not like she just didn't show that to me - and I strongly feel that her upbringing had a lot to do with that.

What throws me is how to distinguish between the Taurus Sun and Cancer Mars when it comes to feels - as I have trouble differentiating sometimes with my Pisces Mars and Taurus. I can't tell from which angle this "behavior" is coming.

See, I don't see myself as very nurturing. I am a problem solver. I don't have a great deal of patience for feelings beyond the "tell me how you are feeling and let me fix it" so I genuinely feel this side of him is refreshing and absolutely beneficial.

But yes, the depth of feeling may be Taurus but that casual ease at which he can just sit in the feeling, run toward it and embrace it even, support and emotionally provide when needed makes me think it's his mars. I've seen the Taurus feeling side, it's very different.
yeah, that sounds familiar - she was a problem solver and so was I but I was much more nurturing then she was - and again, perhaps our definitions are different - I go deeper, much deeper than that - because I do that with myself, I do that with loved ones as well ...

I find it amazing that you can differentiate - I can't seem to do that - maybe I just don't know enough

it sure sounds endearing - he is really opening up so he is definitely all yours !


After 3 and a half years together I bloody hope so! He just keeps getting better and better.

How are you and the Libra?
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we're ok - still the same - thanks - it's hunting season right now so I won't see him as much - he's out with his bow - just got 2 this morning

I am very nurturing with him and he loves it - maybe different placements cause he is a Libra - he said his mother was the same with his father - she was a Taurus as well - same birthday as mine

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I remember feeling relaxed and calm the first time I cuddled with him. Then he told me his birthday.
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Posted by juliettee
taurus is a very nurturing sign. maybe even more than cancers.
Interesting. Maybe it's the Taurus in him?
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Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature. I don't want to be cold to people but if I have to for self preservation I will be.
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I will take one please. Large and fluffy one to give good hugs.

kxthsbye


ohhh wait that isn't what this thread is about?

Darn!
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Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature.
That's really helpful. I'm going to think on this. Thanks.
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Posted by blvckphase
Well.. I know that you are aware of a bit of the history with my Libra. I have a Cancer Mars & Venus.. if that tells you anything.. haha. Sometimes I do not like the influence that Cancer provides.. it allows me to put up with a lot of crap that I shouldn't because I deeply care and want to be there for the ones I love regardless. Sometimes it makes me feel weak.. or like a pathetic doormat. I have 2 shitty aspects to my Venus that really intensifies those qualities (make me hang on for dear life and want to nurture the crap out of my love).. but you know, I wouldn't change those placements for the world. Even though they can be tough to deal with, they make me who I am.. and although I may not receive much appreciation for being this way from the one I expend it all for.. I know he does appreciate it. And beyond that.. A LOT of other people notice this caring, nurturing trait within me almost instantly. It allows people to feel comfortable and at ease with me.. People seem to be able to open up to me even if they barely know me.. and I like that people can feel that way in my presence. smile
Yes my bull has that ability as well. He seems to attract people like a magnet to him. All the waifs and strays (me included) cling.

So your take away point is to make him feel that his nurturing is appreciated so he doesn't feel taken advantage of? It's common sense but something i will be extra conscious to do.
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Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature.
That's really helpful. I'm going to think on this. Thanks.
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no problem just feed him affection it fuels us.

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Posted by LentoBull91
Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature.
That's really helpful. I'm going to think on this. Thanks.

no problem just feed him affection it fuels us.

click to expand


I do. But i always want to do better, be better. I want to know I have turned over every stone so he is not left wanting. I don't want him to harbour any hurts or disappointments where I could have done better.

I'm forever trying to learn more so all this is incredibly useful, even the "turn back, you've gone the wrong way" messages.

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Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature. I don't want to be cold to people but if I have to for self preservation I will be.
you're adorable.
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Aww shucks thank you

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Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature.
That's really helpful. I'm going to think on this. Thanks.

no problem just feed him affection it fuels us.



I do. But i always want to do better, be better. I want to know I have turned over every stone so he is not left wanting. I don't want him to harbour any hurts or disappointments where I could have done better.

I'm forever trying to learn more so all this is incredibly useful, even the "turn back, you've gone the wrong way" messages.

click to expand


It's great to hear that Jeane he must mean alot to you then which is what we want from our partner to be valued/loved. If he's like me he doesn't need much to be content and if you've been with him for 3 years now you've been doing a good job.

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Posted by LentoBull91
Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Posted by jeane
Posted by LentoBull91
Being he's a sun taurus with a cancer mars you get a mix of a lover and nurturer all in one. What you describe sounds like me and I've got the same placements and it can get tiring for me. At times I wish I didn't have it because people do take advantage of it if we let them get too comfortable with it. Thinking we will always stay loving and nurturing even when we are not receiving it back. It's hurts knowing what you give to people they don't give it back in return makes me want to stop and just be cold but being cold is foreign to my nature.
That's really helpful. I'm going to think on this. Thanks.

no problem just feed him affection it fuels us.



I do. But i always want to do better, be better. I want to know I have turned over every stone so he is not left wanting. I don't want him to harbour any hurts or disappointments where I could have done better.

I'm forever trying to learn more so all this is incredibly useful, even the "turn back, you've gone the wrong way" messages.



It's great to hear that Jeane he must mean alot to you then which is what we want from our partner to be valued/loved. If he's like me he doesn't need much to be content and if you've been with him for 3 years now you've been doing a good job.

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Thanks. I hope so. Yes, I love, value, appreciate and respect him. I think you guys are phenomenal people. I know how lucky I am to be given his love.

I do sometimes worry though that if he was unhappy he wouldn't always tell me. He says he would and does when he is annoyed with me but I treat his love like a child carries a precious item. I see my job is to be the best partner I can be to him. Perhaps thats my Libra showing.

It's nice to know that this nurturing side to him, perhaps the cancer side, is freely and generously given as you all describe. I think that's a wonderful quality. I'm not sure I could say that of myself.

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