supporting a cancer through a death

hi guys,

my cancer bf's grandma recently died. when it happened he called me and we talked about it for a very long time. i want to be there for him but i also want to give him his space...i just dont know what to do or when.

basically ive been calling and txting him letting him know i'm here...but then i try to keep the conversations short. the viewing was last night and i had planned on just dropping in for a minute to give him a hug. i was so worried that he'd be mad and think i was intruding, but when i walked in he had the biggest smile on his face, so happy to see me. he asked me three times to come with him to his friends house that night, so i picked him up and took him there. the whole night he left me with the girls and barely acknowledged me. i got kind of mad...ive been doing everything i can to be there, and he just leaves me at the table and does his own thing.

everyone at the party had been talking about going to another party tonight, and i hadnt heard anything about it. at the end of the night i was sitting with him and his friends girlfriend. she asked if i'd be coming...at that exact moment my boyfriend was like, "oh yeah, do you want to come?"

he's usually a very attentive and affectionate boyfriend so i'm willing to dismiss all this as just him being preoccupied with his sadness. what i'm wondering is if i should be doing more, if he needs me to shower him with love right now, or if i should back off, or whatever.

I can say I'm sort of a scatterbrain too you know. Like, when my girlfriends wear something new, I notice it, yet I seem to forget to tell them how nice they look e.g. It has nothing to do with being preoccupated with other things. Sometimes we just wonder of I guess.. I don't think he did it on purpose. Cause he wouldn't have asked you to come with him (to his friends), not wanting you to come with him to the other party afterwards. I think the best way to keep a cancer interested is to show interest without smothering him! greets