To ALL Cancer MEN
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by canceroushugs on Sunday, November 5, 2006 and has 20 replies.
---i wanna hear from the cancer men.....what is your deal?? so many ladies complain about your lack of emotion and appreciation....id like to know why? and if there is any hope of change?
or if you want to defend yourself...please do. all us ladies want is to feel wanted and see some EFFORT!
or if you want to defend yourself...please do. all us ladies want is to feel wanted and see some EFFORT!
Possible factors:
-Trying not to be so clinging
-Low-esteem/Afraid of being put down or embarassed
-Fear of being betrayed/rejected
-Fear of not measuring up to expectations
There's hope of change. A cancer will always change if necessary, especially in a relationship. Analyze your cancer guy and try to see what will work. Assure him too. Good luck!
-Trying not to be so clinging
-Low-esteem/Afraid of being put down or embarassed
-Fear of being betrayed/rejected
-Fear of not measuring up to expectations
There's hope of change. A cancer will always change if necessary, especially in a relationship. Analyze your cancer guy and try to see what will work. Assure him too. Good luck!
my lack of emotion and appreciation? i have not had those complaints in any real relationship. my problem is making a move and getting into the relationship in the first place, which isn't necessarily fear of rejection.
i don't care if i'm rejected; that's life. my problem stems from this: i won't get interested in a woman unless i know her very well first. attraction is not substantial to me, so i generally have to be friends first--and very close friends at that. then, strangely, unless she hits me over the head trying to let me know how she feels, i'll feel like i could be burdening our friendship. my fears and insecurities are concerned with burdening people with my emotions. i can be pretty intense in my relationships and i know that it's not to everybody's taste, so i try to take peoples' feelings into account whenever possible, and tone it down. but in the end, it's pretty stupid on my part and i know i've lost out on some pretty great potential relationships.
as far as appreciation and emotional openness goes in relationships, i don't recall any instances of either being pointed out.
i don't care if i'm rejected; that's life. my problem stems from this: i won't get interested in a woman unless i know her very well first. attraction is not substantial to me, so i generally have to be friends first--and very close friends at that. then, strangely, unless she hits me over the head trying to let me know how she feels, i'll feel like i could be burdening our friendship. my fears and insecurities are concerned with burdening people with my emotions. i can be pretty intense in my relationships and i know that it's not to everybody's taste, so i try to take peoples' feelings into account whenever possible, and tone it down. but in the end, it's pretty stupid on my part and i know i've lost out on some pretty great potential relationships.
as far as appreciation and emotional openness goes in relationships, i don't recall any instances of either being pointed out.
huh?WHY da lack of emotion and appreciation?Lol wow. First time i'm hearing this. I think there's alot of reasons. One.... the fact that we observe first. We do not give our hearts so readily. Second... if while in a relationship the lady GIVES mixed signals then we would be very cautious goin ahead. I'll give an example" If a lady wants money burrowed and she says"I'll pay you back just remind me" and then after a few weeks pass waiting for u to ring her and ask for the money back and then u finally did,SHe then dissolves the close "relationship" due to u asking her for the money. In other words she was testing you. ANd LAstly.... we do show appreciation but we do limit it because some people take us cancers for granted so we kinda have a hard shell at times.
This topic is ridiculous. N/O
what hog wash
are u sure youre talking about cancer men (sounds more like cancer women
are u sure youre talking about cancer men (sounds more like cancer women
im an aries gal wi cancerien man, i dont think it is lack of emotion... they are the most emotional sign there is!!! it is lack of communication, secretive that bothers me. one minute very loving and next you dont hear from them for ages... times they are so romantic and want you til the day he die etc... then next nothing!
we are pretty secretive. i tend to lost interest for a little bit, then bam! i want you again
I think it might be because they are SO EMOTIONAL, but being a MAN they hide that emotion as much as possible because society tells us that men need to be strong. Same thing with Scorpio male. There's a ton of emotion going on behind the scenes, but take one look at their faces and you would NEVER know. Being a cancer female, It's easy for me to be emotional cos most women are and it's accepted (even though I know I am OVER EMOTIONAL at times which can be quite annoying to some)
YES, I WANT to kno wut is up with cancer men. I can't tell if hes telln me the truth when we are intimiate, or telln me the truth when he decides to be distant.
Please read my message board: is my cancerian friend just using me?
Please read my message board: is my cancerian friend just using me?
If I declare my love to a Cancer man, will he look at me like I am crazy?
virgos have emotions?
ha! the virgo comment, great. cancer men, i'm married to one, have ton's of deep emotions. and alot of insecurities. it's like they're just waiting for the world to look at them and say, "hey, you aren't good enough for the rest of us, begone!" as an aries, i of course don't feel anything of the sort. my guy has been accused of the aloof thing in the past by other women. but if you look into those eyes, there's soooo much going on. heck, HE was the one weeping during our wedding ceremony!! i think it's protectiveness. although, he is secretive and shelled up sometimes. and he'll fib about things that he knows will set me off. i just leave him alone or go off without him and have fun while leaving him at home. that'll bring his butt right back around to center, that's for sure.
hehe! Redhedgurl you seem to have the right atitude to handle your cancerman. I might start taking a leaf out of your book.
ha. thanks mellow dee (cute handle) one of the biggest gifts you can give a cancer, esp. a man, is to accept him. all the way. period. no changes or manipulation if you can do it. and trust me, these guys have some quirks!! but they long for acceptance and validation. they seem to have some deep seated insecurities. so, when he seems to need it, i shower him with my sunny lovin' smiles. i let him be who he is, and i give him space when he needs it. or, when he's ticked me off and needs some time out time! see they have a tendency toward negetetivity sometimes, and can say some of the stupidest, mean stuff. just critical. well, i just let him simmer all on his own. and he hates being on his own more than anything. when he's ready to play nice again, then i'm all his. i don't push. i never yell. i fight fair, and i don't play drama games. seems to keep the balance in place.
i am a virgo woman, and for the past 5 years, thats all ive been meeting are cancer men. are they connected in some way? its pretty freaky.and they all act the same. insensitive,arrogant,and mean. i still love me a cancer tho.
merc - what are are blathering about ? to say the very least at least moon and I listen to you - but then again you don't care if I listen to you - only moon...so what are you complaining about?
i LOVE my cancer man. i am an aries and we are the most incompatable 2 signs you can put together. i have read this somewhere, but it also says that if we survived the 1st year then it would be a lasting relationship.
i met mine on internet a year and half ago. the first year he was very secretive and hardly phoned or txt me... but i gave him the benefit of the doubt. and now he is the perfect boyfriend (soon to be fiance) all he wants is to set up home and start a family, even tho he is 14yrs younger than i. he always tellin me how he loves me, that he was put in this world by god to find me etc., so cancerians are very emotional and sensitive. he does not buy me gifts often but last week he went to spain and came back with heaps of designer gifts
cancerians have high tastes me thinks. what i sayin, once the cancerian realise he can trust you and you genuinely care for him, he will respond by being the most loving and loyal and faithful man. my bf loves me so, that he admit he dont mind that i wear the trouser and is happy for me to be the boss, but this is not to say he is soft and that i take advantage of this. i have high repstect for him that i would not take him for granted. i have earned his trust and he clearly shows he loves me in public and we get lots of attentions cos he is also very gorgeous looking guy. i think cancerian men are beautiful looking . if you want to last with the cancer man, then be patient and once he sussed you really do love him and wont hurt him he will reward you. all my bf ever does is talk about me to his friends, family and even shop assistants.
i met mine on internet a year and half ago. the first year he was very secretive and hardly phoned or txt me... but i gave him the benefit of the doubt. and now he is the perfect boyfriend (soon to be fiance) all he wants is to set up home and start a family, even tho he is 14yrs younger than i. he always tellin me how he loves me, that he was put in this world by god to find me etc., so cancerians are very emotional and sensitive. he does not buy me gifts often but last week he went to spain and came back with heaps of designer gifts
cancerians have high tastes me thinks. what i sayin, once the cancerian realise he can trust you and you genuinely care for him, he will respond by being the most loving and loyal and faithful man. my bf loves me so, that he admit he dont mind that i wear the trouser and is happy for me to be the boss, but this is not to say he is soft and that i take advantage of this. i have high repstect for him that i would not take him for granted. i have earned his trust and he clearly shows he loves me in public and we get lots of attentions cos he is also very gorgeous looking guy. i think cancerian men are beautiful looking . if you want to last with the cancer man, then be patient and once he sussed you really do love him and wont hurt him he will reward you. all my bf ever does is talk about me to his friends, family and even shop assistants.oh....she finally got me....moon hit me with a revived thread....... damn....
i dated a cancer for several months, and i found him to be the most loving and attentive guy i've dated yet. the one problem i had was his fear to commit, but i'm guessing that may be due to an afflicted planet in his chart...so in general, i think most cancer men really are loving. i haven't met one yet that wasn't, even if it's hard for them to open up at first. you just have to make them feel secure in your love...which was easy for me to do, as a scorpio. good luck!
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