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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
..he's STILL in love with his ex I've recently been informed...even tho he's still talking of moving in with me..7mos of him.being here then going, getting scared coming back you know the drill..me being compassionate as f*ck!! Facepalm....I don't think I can live with someone who still pines for his ex....so..compassionate care or kick his ass to the curb? I kinda already know the answer but might as well weigh in anyway and have my ass handed to me. Cheers y'all..
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Well I WAS!! Til this bomb was dropped..Pisces yr still here yay!!
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
I know cancers have a hard time.letting go of the past..and I have no fucking clue why he'd wanna live with me...all he talked about was how scared he was to do so cuz he's afraid of getting hurt. But hmmm think I'm the one getting hurt here..
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
And completely change my plans and say seeyas!! Its rough..
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Girl logic has nothing to do with this. Turning off feelings for another human is difficult no matter what. Time invested, plans dreams etc...
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Mar 19, 2012Comments: 273 · Posts: 5457 · Topics: 33
It's nice that he was honest, but now it's time for him to face the reality of the situation. Sounds like maybe he thinks you're convenient for him or a stabilizer in his life? But once he finds someone who really ignites his feelings, I bet he'd end up leaving anyway. Not to say he doesn't actually care for you, but it's likely not an intense feeling for him. If you like him enough, I would hold off on anyone moving but ask to try to work on 'us'. Maybe he'll eventually fall hard for you. Or not. That gamble is up to you. Butttt, if he's not actively trying to move on from his ex and is instead sitting there wallowing in sadness and feelings, then he won't be changing any time soon and I would definitely drop him. Might want to have a serious conversation about all of your thoughts and feelings regarding this and depending on his responses and reactions, you'll have a better idea of what to do, imo.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Thanks you guys for all your input! I am a Pisces. He has actually on many occasions said he has strong feelings for me even loved me. And it is nice he is honest about it. I dont think hes using me. I know he is very confused. He has brought her up before and i thought he WAS making progress, I thought we were past it..but I was wrong! His strong feelings for me scare him, hes said many times. Hes clearly confused as fuck. I agree he prolly won't respect me if I still do it after hes said this..best to let him be and maybe he'll realize what he's done. Def a fuck boy move. I know he cares about me deeply this he has expressed many times...SIGH!!
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Selling dreams, I like that!! Ksam, dont you think it'll bite me in the ass??
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Oh you thought ksam was sarcasm...yea...i dunno..
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Yea I agree with both of you.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
It stil confuses the crap.outta why he'd wanna live with me if hes so confused/scared etc. I know he doesn't have ill intentions, hes not trying to be a prick. He is very sensitive sweet and compassionate. And he takes cues from me a lot, in order to determine how to proceed.. Hes really insecure I guess.
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Oct 08, 2015Comments: 2 · Posts: 1193 · Topics: 43
If cancers live in the past...won't she also become apart of his past?
Cancers yall are wrong just totally wrong for putting a new girl through stress knowing dam well yall ain't ready to move forward. Then have the nerve to leave the new girl all discombobulated and hurt...smh.
Please move on.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Ksam..ive definitely learned a lot from this already..he keeps saying he just needs time..but I don't think he's really working thru anything. I'm all but tapped out on the compassion.sigh. Shaniajam: Word!!!
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
I believe that's true...sigh..nope I'm not the one.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Oh that comment was for Ashley..that's cute ksam.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Well @goligold I knew it was a thing..i just thought he'd moved past it, but he clearly hasn't..i dont think I should stay and be a fool or second best anymore..how much more time can I give him? And even then...its still a crapshoot...
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
No..hes not talking to her, or making attempts to be with her..he just harbors these feelings that wont go away he says. He just tells me. Hes not cheating or anything..he just cant let go of the past and move on with me..hes scared shitless and clings to her memory.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Libwman he's afraid of his own shadow ffs! Ha..and yea it has been all him, but he has also felt genuinely bad about all this..he's cried etc..he doesn't wanna hurt me, he just can't get past it. Goligold maybe not in those words but you get the idea..
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Sep 07, 2014Comments: 0 · Posts: 497 · Topics: 31
I'm sorry you are going through this. The logical thing to do is break free and move on. Sounds easy right???
I say follow your gut. We all go through phrase in life and we certainly encounter ppl not by chance. We all play a role in ppl lives. You may be in his life to help him grow and move forward or to teach him what real love is. Only time and patience will tell. Follow your intuition and pray.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
@missgemmi good advice! Infinite8 you too!
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Man I totally agree with both of you so much!!! Its like they refuse to be happy..and yes being with me reminds him of happiness with her! Ugh you cant win!
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
They confuse longing with love.
What's love got to do with it? He said he is stil in love with his ex? What does he want to do with those feelings? What does she want? Is she involved or does she have the same feelings? I will always be in love my ex Nikki Carter. I will love her until the day I die but I won't marry or ever commit to her again.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
Thanks for the advice @blackmamba and yes it is..
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
That sucks impulsiv! They've been apart for a long time, I'm not a rebound he takes relationships very seriously he does not sleep around, hes very reserved and guarded. Unfortunately how strong feelings for me weren't enough for me to make the cut I guess...or I give him time indefinitely which is crazy. He just wants me to be happy he says.
You can continue your relationship but slow it down a notch. The evolution and dissolution of emotions are different for everybody. Many times when two people date one falls harder for the other at a different pace. Then after the break-up one partner moves on faster than the other... No biggie to me. People are all different, we process differently fall in love differently fall out of love differently... So find out where he is in the process, and then adjust yourself accordingly. Apparently he likes you a lot.
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Oct 24, 2014Comments: 1 · Posts: 2706 · Topics: 56
^^you have a good feeling about my situation?? I do see what you're saying..Arielle, he has a lot of mom issues I think he's a glutton for punishment, but believe me, he is INTO me..hes said how much it frightens him.sometimes..thats why he backs off...he is overwhelmed. I don't think he'd wanna live with me if he wasn't that into me..but maybe on wrong. I'm also one of his best friends.