Whats up with Cancer Men sendin ''mixed'' signals?
This topic was created in the Cancer forum by PrettyBitterCancer on Friday, October 18, 2013 and has 12 replies.
Well first off im a cancer 7/11 and so is my friend 7/16..Basically we us to be fwb but he cut it off abruptly one day when I refused to come see hime due to his moody bad attitude. But we still texted and talked being mean to each then nice..u ko the emotional rollercoaster thing. Anywho he kno I have a new friend and so does he (im not stupid us cancers are very secretive) the issue is that when we talk he's always so mean and nasty but then turns around and say how much he cares for me and he will refuse to hang up until my mood is back happy. Also when i'm talking to him telling him I want to go back to the old times, I miss him blah blah..he would only respond by saying DONT U HAVE A NEW FRIEND..SMH..ANOTHER THING ugghh im all over place excuse me lol ....Back to what I was saying he keeps saying how he hates me stop calling/texting him...and yet he engages in the arguement everytime..We have this crazy weird unspoken bond. We have said the most hateful things to each other then 5 mins later we're back in each other face or texting like nothing happen. IDK if he's jealous, if he likes, me if he hates me..If I ignore him he goes nutz calling me..But when I start talking about feelings and cry he get pissed off saying how he doesnt feel like the mushy shit lol...smh I dont get it???
I say ask him right out. My advice may not be the best, because to me there are two types of cancer men. The mean ones that can pop off or blow up out of nowhere (perhaps they are mad about something they never mentioned and need to lash out all of a damn sudden), and then there are the really sweet ones that can get mean if pushed. I can deal with the 2nd one, because that??s how I am. Sweet on the surface, but don??t eff with me though, or I??ll will get cold as ice and shut you completely out.
Your cancer sounds like the cancer I just cut off. I cut him off every time he gets like that. True he always comes back, but if he acts out I will cut him off again. Life is too short, and I??m nobody??s emotional punching bag. I will tell him straight out, I don??t know what you want and I cannot read your mind whether you believe it or not! So open up your mouth, use your words, or I can??t help you or the situation. I don??t give him a way out, its either speak or leave. If he chooses to speak we talk it out, and we go from there. If he chooses to shut down, I leave him alone until he??s ready to talk. Like I said my advice may not be best because, I??m an air sign and I believe in giving people space whether they want it or not, because I??m not about to be emotionally abused because you??re going through something and don??t know how to talk about it. So that??s my take on it. Sorry if it didn??t help.
Your cancer sounds like the cancer I just cut off. I cut him off every time he gets like that. True he always comes back, but if he acts out I will cut him off again. Life is too short, and I??m nobody??s emotional punching bag. I will tell him straight out, I don??t know what you want and I cannot read your mind whether you believe it or not! So open up your mouth, use your words, or I can??t help you or the situation. I don??t give him a way out, its either speak or leave. If he chooses to speak we talk it out, and we go from there. If he chooses to shut down, I leave him alone until he??s ready to talk. Like I said my advice may not be best because, I??m an air sign and I believe in giving people space whether they want it or not, because I??m not about to be emotionally abused because you??re going through something and don??t know how to talk about it. So that??s my take on it. Sorry if it didn??t help.
Classic Cancer testing 101. To see how you react to certain situations or statements. Think of an elastic band, you snap it back and forth until eventually it will stretch beyond it's original form and snap.
That's how they see things when intrigued or interested in someone.
Nip that ish in quick cause it can go on indefinitely until they are sure about you.
That's how they see things when intrigued or interested in someone.
Nip that ish in quick cause it can go on indefinitely until they are sure about you.
Posted by insertyourquarters
Classic Cancer testing 101. To see how you react to certain situations or statements. Think of an elastic band, you snap it back and forth until eventually it will stretch beyond it's original form and snap.
That's how they see things when intrigued or interested in someone.
Nip that ish in quick cause it can go on indefinitely until they are sure about you.
when you say nip that ish you mean walk away and never look back? these cancer dudes don't listen when you try to reason with them usually....so it does go on indefinitely if you so choose to play their games
hah mine knows that he sucks but he still can't stop sucking even though he's promised many times to change but still...no change
@prettybitter so you either have to play their games or don't play at all. but if you're gonna play, don't be afraid of losing. gotta go about it fearlessly if you really want this guy. first you gotta figure out if you really want him or not. doesn't matter if he's playing games. figure out for yourself if he is worth it. once you know the answer to that then you proceed. why bother with this crap if you aren't going to want him in the end anyway. but if you only want him then why have another friend on the side. but if you really want him you gotta take all the ups and downs and mood swings and sulking and bitchiness.
for me..I think mine is worth it. he is testing me and my limits. i'm holding on but i'm not waiting around for attention or change in behavior. i know he's going to test me and I know he's going to wait and see if I still want him even though he's constantly pushing me away or not showing me any of his true feelings. when he does show them it's like finally bathing in a waterfall after being in the dessert for weeks without a drop of water. So is it worth it to you and other suffering ladies? you gotta be the judge. because when it is dry...heck it is dryyyyyy.....you can't let it take you to a new low just to finally get that high when they come back. if you can manage to keep your own emotions in check I think it is best not to get swept up on their roller coasters.
No, I mean call him out on it and tell him you won't put up with it.
You have to go about it the right way though as they won't take it seriously until you stay a certain way and don't budge.
These guys never come directly so you have to try and challenge them in way that almost will suit them but don't dance around it like they do.
You have to go about it the right way though as they won't take it seriously until you stay a certain way and don't budge.
These guys never come directly so you have to try and challenge them in way that almost will suit them but don't dance around it like they do.
I'm with a Cancer and know most of his moves now. 
I appreciate the advice everyone.. I hadnt answer any of his calls since Wednesday..since he thinks he's the only one who can answer when he wants. Also I left out that he's 24 im 30. Hes mature for his age unless whe have to discuss something about feelings..He shuts down then..He's always being mean and nasty to me but wants to see me then changes his mind..Emotional Rollercoaster.. He is like an angry grumpy Cancer while im the happy loving one..The only time he shows emotion is when I threaten to cut him off..We're always testing each other with these psychological mind games.
Posted by geminibunnyPosted by insertyourquarters
Classic Cancer testing 101. To see how you react to certain situations or statements. Think of an elastic band, you snap it back and forth until eventually it will stretch beyond it's original form and snap.
That's how they see things when intrigued or interested in someone.
Nip that ish in quick cause it can go on indefinitely until they are sure about you.
when you say nip that ish you mean walk away and never look back? these cancer dudes don't listen when you try to reason with them usually....so it does go on indefinitely if you so choose to play their games
hah mine knows that he sucks but he still can't stop sucking even though he's promised many times to change but still...no change
@prettybitter so you either have to play their games or don't play at all. but if you're gonna play, don't be afraid of losing. gotta go about it fearlessly if you really want this guy. first you gotta figure out if you really want him or not. doesn't matter if he's playing games. figure out for yourself if he is worth it. once you know the answer to that then you proceed. why bother with this crap if you aren't going to want him in the end anyway. but if you only want him then why have another friend on the side. but if you really want him you gotta take all the ups and downs and mood swings and sulking and bitchiness.
for me..I think mine is worth it. he is testing me and my limits. i'm holding on but i'm not waiting around for attention or change in behavior. i know he's going to test me and I know he's going to wait and see if I still want him even though he's constantly pushing me away or not showing me any of his true feelings. when he does show them it's like finally bathing in a waterfall after being in the dessert for weeks without a drop of water. So is it worth it to you and other suffering ladies? you gotta be the judge. because when it is dry...heck it is dryyyyyy.....you can't let it take you to a new low just to finally get that high when they come back. if you can manage to keep your own emotions in check I think it is best not to get swept up on their roller coasters.click to expand
Im an EXTREMELY emotional cancer, everything makes me cry lol..Its hard keeping my emotions in check they're on my sleeves and I feel as if I have no co
*no control
We as women are in touch with our emotions and feelings more so than guys, but in particular us water women. I myself am a Scorpio Sun.
As a moonchild guy, it's more difficult expressing themselves to people they are interested in. All you can do is have the patience and give them time till they are ready to come forward and share.
It is all worth it as I just discovered last week.
As a moonchild guy, it's more difficult expressing themselves to people they are interested in. All you can do is have the patience and give them time till they are ready to come forward and share.
It is all worth it as I just discovered last week.
Posted by insertyourquarters
We as women are in touch with our emotions and feelings more so than guys, but in particular us water women. I myself am a Scorpio Sun.
As a moonchild guy, it's more difficult expressing themselves to people they are interested in. All you can do is have the patience and give them time till they are ready to come forward and share.
It is all worth it as I just discovered last week.
that's exactly what he said to me that it was difficult for him to express his emotions especially to someone he likes....sigh...
Hope he comes around for you because I walked away from mine but we still talked and expressed unspoken feelings towards each other, I being the more stubborn moon in taurus pulled back until more recently. I wouldn't say I went about it the right way but now I know patience does really pay off with them.
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