A Ridiculous Update

After three months, Cap Sun/Cap Moon finally started a conversation with me that WASN'T about work. Two of them, actually! Politics and tarot/astrology/candles/allergies. The trade-off is we don't talk every day now (which I prefer, actually), but hey! I told him we were building friendship bridges! And he didn't rebuff!

I wager it's only four more years before we hang out again (jkomgnotreally).

I'm a cap sun/cap moon. I don't feel like I'm a good conversationalist. I don't have the gift of gab. Small talk seems pointless and a waste of time.
It's easy to talk about things that are going on in my life - and work is important, so it's always on the front burner. So much of my focus is on work (cap placements).
If I don't have something going on, then there's nothing to talk about - much like every one else.
And hobbies that I'm interested in, I assume no one wants to hear all about that. I mean, I don't want to have to listen to someone else going on about something I'm not interested in, so I assume no one wants to hear about my stuff either. Oh, a little is okay, but not to go on and on and on like some people do.

I wish I could be like my Sag friends and just ask question after question about someone's hobbies. It makes the other person feel interesting and important, but really, I just don't care to hear all about it.

Oh, the downside of that cap moon.

I know you're not looking for advice or really wanted to discuss. You're just following up.

It's good that he's gone to some other topics besides work- you're making progress!!

Posted by truecap
I know you're not looking for advice or really wanted to discuss. You're just following up.

It's good that he's gone to some other topics besides work- you're making progress!!

No, no. I really appreciate the advice. This whole experience has been a tremendous learning lesson, and I admit it's been one I have struggled with, or at least at first. He is so hot and cold, so distant, then close--I've stepped away from the idea of romance and am just looking at this as a friendship, some major karmic lesson that the Universe keeps pushing in my face no matter how many times I mentally walk away. Be the point patience or balance or acceptance, who knows? But it does help to know that Cap Sun/Moon is more practical and disappears or goes radio silent because there's nothing going on versus no interest, even platonically. So, thank you!

He has a Sag/Merc, so he flows with goofy talk sometimes, even instigates. It's just so rare. And he is busy with work, very stressed, I know. So I am trying to give him his space. I guess my biggest "fear" is that I don't want to be 1) used for my positivity/support or 2) used for flirty sex purposes (he is a sexter). My Leo sensibilites balk at the thought of being taken advantage of, but I am also realizing... if I think or feel he is, I can just tell him, and so be it. Watch the chips fall as they will. It won't be the end of the world, and it certainly won't affect my pride or image, ya know?

Also, for what it's worth, being able to fire off hobby questions and make small talk... it has major downsides. Sometimes it's cool and helpful, but then you will run across those people (about 1 in 3) who will drown you in THE most dull stories, all about them... then never ask you anything in return. Then you stew in the fact that you just wasted 20 minutes that could have been spent doing something fun. So, I think that Cap Moon might save you from a lot of party hellishness.

I really wish I had a strong Scorpio placement so I could just say, "Go away; you're boring." Ah, the dream 😉

Posted by truecap
I'm a cap sun/cap moon. I don't feel like I'm a good conversationalist. I don't have the gift of gab. Small talk seems pointless and a waste of time.
It's easy to talk about things that are going on in my life - and work is important, so it's always on the front burner. So much of my focus is on work (cap placements).
If I don't have something going on, then there's nothing to talk about - much like every one else.
And hobbies that I'm interested in, I assume no one wants to hear all about that. I mean, I don't want to have to listen to someone else going on about something I'm not interested in, so I assume no one wants to hear about my stuff either. Oh, a little is okay, but not to go on and on and on like some people do.

I wish I could be like my Sag friends and just ask question after question about someone's hobbies. It makes the other person feel interesting and important, but really, I just don't care to hear all about it.

Oh, the downside of that cap moon.

If you weren't you, you wouldn't be YOU and then you wouldn't be the TrueCap we know and love on here... 😕
So it goes both ways.